Feeling angry about not making it to mass

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Galnextdoor

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I am allergic to antibiotics. If catch something like strep-throat, it takes me a month to get over it. Intellectually, I know I can’t go to mass and it’s not a sin, but emotionally I feel guilty and angry. I have no one to help me out. I live about 15 miles from church. I don’t know anyone who lives out my way who is Catholic. I have a 17 year old with numerous disabilities. When I can’t make it to mass, he doesn’t make it to mass either. Part of me is really angry that I can’t make it to Church and wonders why God allows this to happen to me.
Any suggestions about what I can do to get rid of this anger and guilt?

Also, I am pretty sure that I am getting sick from working in the church’s food pantry. I work the desk where I hand the food to the people. Nobody wants to work this desk because the people coming in for food often have mono, pneumonia, strep-throat, the flu and everything else. I had someone tell me she had a temperature of a 102 and then coughed in my face. I came down with what she had.

No one wants to work that desk. If I’m not there, the pantry frequently wont open and the needy don’t get food. If I go, I end up sick and miss mass.

Any suggestions about what I should do? I thought about wearing a mask, but I have to ask people questions and it’s difficult to be understood through a mask.
 
If you can’t make it to Mass, you can’t make it. You can be frustrated but God is in charge not you. I live for Mass so I hate to miss it too.:hug1:

I work with children and I developed a remarkable immune system over a few years. I am wondering if your immune system is weak for some reason. So wearing a mask may be an option? You can just say “I have a weakened immune system.” Just a few thoughts.😉
 
Galnextdoor said:
I am allergic to antibiotics. If catch something like strep-throat, it takes me a month to get over it. Intellectually, I know I can’t go to mass and it’s not a sin, but emotionally I feel guilty and angry. I have no one to help me out. I live about 15 miles from church. I don’t know anyone who lives out my way who is Catholic. I have a 17 year old with numerous disabilities. When I can’t make it to mass, he doesn’t make it to mass either. Part of me is really angry that I can’t make it to Church and wonders why God allows this to happen to me.
Any suggestions about what I can do to get rid of this anger and guilt?

Also, I am pretty sure that I am getting sick from working in the church’s food pantry. I work the desk where I hand the food to the people. Nobody wants to work this desk because the people coming in for food often have mono, pneumonia, strep-throat, the flu and everything else. I had someone tell me she had a temperature of a 102 and then coughed in my face. I came down with what she had.

No one wants to work that desk. If I’m not there, the pantry frequently wont open and the needy don’t get food. If I go, I end up sick and miss mass.

Any suggestions about what I should do? I thought about wearing a mask, but I have to ask people questions and it’s difficult to be understood through a mask.
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You might want to check out some immune boosting vitamins that are now readily available in most stores and drug stores. It’s becoming very common to treat as many people get sick as they fly on airplanes, etc.
 
OP, hugs! I feel for and with you. I have a long term illness which means my immune system is down and anywhere where there are folk in a confined space is dangerous. I went to my landlord;s oldest daughters First Communion a while back and was ill for several weeks, The following year I had to explain I could not attend. Your health must be protected. My family has a saying when one of us is tempted to do something unwise" You are no use to is dead!" It has taken me years to drop the guilt re mass, but now I am relieved and at peace about it, I shop on the rare occasions I am out early in the day and stay away from crowded places. Easy to do in rural co Kerry, I live alone in an old farmhouse in the mountains as I am also allergic to chemicals eg perfumed cosmetics and cleaning materials. Sorry but it is madness to do the work you are doing; not heroic… There are so many ways to serve without risking certain illness. So many ways to live the love of Jesus. I lived many years housebound and then where it was impossible to get to Mass… TV helped and I learned the love is wherever I am. Psalmist say " Beware of anger; it only leads to sin…" And are we not taught about seeking martyrdom? Remember Little Flower also. Accept your limitations and respect your needs and your body… would say yes re a mask BUT it might affect the dignity and needs of the ones you are feeding… Thank you for posting as I have only recently myself dropped any guilt re missing mass and the relief is huge… Thank you and blessings and peace. Oh I am well over 70 by the way… working still to feed others by knitting and making rosaries to sell…semi bedbound but deeply fulfilled and in His love.
 
First of all you may want to consider a flue shot and a pneumonia shot each fall. This is not medical advice, but just good sense and good precautions to take unless there is good reason not to. Secondly a positive attitude is a necessary medicine to ward of many communicable illnesses. A smile and a happy outlook is often better than any pill or shot in the arm. If you miss mass through no fault of your making, then why get angry about it? Our ancestors missed a lot of masse back in the days of making America. As far as your son is concerned perhaps you could both watch mass on EWTN and make a little “retreat” or joyful day of it. I am pretty sure God will not smite you with a bolt of lightning if you miss mass due to illness. I think your anger is misdirected. Peace and prayers.
 
Galnextdoor,

Do not feel guilty when, through no fault of your own, you cannot make it to Mass. You can set aside about a half-hour or more for slowly reading the Gospel and/or a rosary during that time. Or there may be a televised Mass on and you can take part that way, and make a spiritual communion.

God bless you,

Dorothy
 
There are a few things you can do about this.
For starters, talk with your parish priest. He can help you mare than anybody on this forum can, and he can possibly give you communion after mass.
Secondly, you can wear a mask to the church. Ignore what other people think. This is GREAT for practicing humility. “Blessed are the meek, for they shall inherit the earth” - Matthew 5:5
Of course, you can always watch the mass on TV, or read the scriptures at home if you don’t do any of the above. But remember, only miss mass and communion if you REALLY have to. Be hard on yourself, but not too hard.
God bless you and I hope you get through this.
 
In several places, but for sure in Mike Aquilina’s book Mass of the Early Christians
(amazon.com/Mass-Early-Christians-Mike-Aquilina/dp/1592763200/ref=sr_1_sc_2?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1457069654&sr=1-2-spell&keywords=auilina)

there is an account of Christians who, on their way to death, are asked why they meet for Mass, it is recorded that one said “because it is that which we cannot live without.” This is perhaps why you feel separated, etc.

Whether you attend Mass once a week or every day or just when you can, it should not be boring, it should not be a chore, etc. (and I’m not reading you as saying that, by any means).

If you haven’t already, read over the meditation of Mother Theresa (warning: explicit image of Christ suffering) mcpriests.com/03_I_thirst_PrayerEN.htm

Sure, wear a mask, use hand sanitizer, etc.
 
sirach2v4 said:
In several places, but for sure in Mike Aquilina’s book Mass of the Early Christians
(amazon.com/Mass-Early-Christians-Mike-Aquilina/dp/1592763200/ref=sr_1_sc_2?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1457069654&sr=1-2-spell&keywords=auilina)

there is an account of Christians who, on their way to death, are asked why they meet for Mass, it is recorded that one said “because it is that which we cannot live without.” This is perhaps why you feel separated, etc.

Whether you attend Mass once a week or every day or just when you can, it should not be boring, it should not be a chore, etc. (and I’m not reading you as saying that, by any means).

If you haven’t already, read over the meditation of Mother Theresa (warning: explicit image of Christ suffering) mcpriests.com/03_I_thirst_PrayerEN.htm

Sure, wear a mask, use hand sanitizer, etc.
Click to expand...
Thank you for your links. The “I Thirst” reflection was consoling.
 
Speaking as someone who once walked to church in an icestorm, and got a nice broken arm as my prize –

You are serving God, and you need to tell Him to get you some help! He doesn’t expect you to do everything, and sometimes He lets you realize that you really can’t.

There is no reason why you should be the only person working the desk, too. I agree that you need to talk to the priest about sharing the load with others, and recruiting more help.

Practically speaking - when you are sick, your son probably is carrying it too. You wouldn’t want him to make other people sick, right? In any case, he’s excused from Mass so that he can take care of you, and also because of impossibility of going.
 
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