Feeling lost and hopeless

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jcl1904

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Hello
I am 24 years old and I was raised and brought up in a very good, large catholic family and even though I have been further away from the physical Church in recent years, I still feel very close to God and pray to him.

I am starting to feel as though my prayers are going unheard and unanswered. I have been battling depression for 3 years now, due mainly to a very mentally abusive relationship I was in. And although I have made much progress in my self esteem and overcoming this abuse,
I still have feelings of nobody really caring about me very much, even including my own family.

One of my biggest causes for lack of faith is that I have been praying to God for years to bring someone kind, caring, and loving into my life and it has yet to happen in any form. I have only had 1 serious relationship in my life which is the one which I was mentally hurt badly. And since that relationship I haven’t dated a single person, its been a few years. I know the for a long time I wasn’t ready, had not healed from this and my self esteem and confidence was not ready for me to be able to be in a relationship.
But I truly feel ready now and have for a long time now and I pray to God for it to happen. I recently met someone whom I truly believed could have became someone wonderful, and again it happened where when I was open and willing it feels like God is just slamming the door in my face saying haha, this is what you would like but too bad, it isn’t happening.

I just have little faith left that God will ever give me happiness and feeling of worth or worthy of real care and love.

I know to some this will seem very insignificant, but I just need some uplifting words.

I apologize if I put this in the wrong forum, I couldn’t find another one for advice or encouragement.
 
NAB Jeremiah 29
11 For I know well the plans I have in mind for you, says the LORD,** plans for your welfare, not for woe! plans to give you a future full of hope. **12 When you call me, when you go to pray to me, I will listen to you.
13 When you look for me, you will find me. Yes, when you seek me with all your heart,
14 you will find me with you, says the LORD, and I will change your lot; I will gather you together from all the nations and all the places to which I have banished you, says the LORD, and bring you back to the place from which I have exiled you.

I will say a prayer for you.
 
I hope that you will return to the Mass and Sacraments where Jesus is waiting for you with love! ❤️ Is there a Eucharistic Adoration Chapel nearby where you can visit Him?

Praying for you …

:blessyou:
 
Welcome! 🙂
There is nothing insignificant about the loneliness and sadness you are feeling.
I’m sure the Lord is longing for you to return to the Sacraments of Reconciliation and Eucharist as much as you are longing for a loving person in your life!

What you long for, and the seemingly fruitless waiting, I’ve seen my sons go through and it has taken some years before each found someone who loves him in return for his love. One has suffered a great deal of abuse in various forms from a previous relationship, but has finally found a wonderful person whom he hopes to marry. They are all some years older than you.
Knowing what my boys have gone through I understands something of your pain.

I’ll keep you in my prayers, Love.
Please take good care of yourself. :grouphug:
 
I think part of the problem is that you, like most of us (myself included) are looking for fulfillment in the wrong place. This small piece by a famous Catholic Priest and author gives who had many of his own personal bouts with loneliness and depression really put things into perspective for me when I was starting to struggle with similar feelings of desire for a significant other.
We live in a society in which loneliness has become one of the most painful human wounds. The growing competition and rivalry which pervade our lives from birth have created in us an acute awareness of our isolation. This awareness has in turn left many with a heightened anxiety and an intense search for the experience of unity and community. It has also led people to ask anew how love, friendship, brotherhood and sisterhood can free them from isolation and offer them a sense of intimacy and belonging. All around us we see the many ways by which the people of the western world are trying to escape this loneliness…. But the more I think about loneliness, the more I think that the wound of loneliness is like the Grand Canyon – a deep incision in the surface of our existence which has become an inexhaustible source of beauty and self-understanding… The Christian way of life does not take away our loneliness; it protects and cherishes it as a precious gift. Sometimes it seems as if we do everything possible to avoid the painful confrontation with our basic human loneliness, and allow ourselves to be trapped by false gods promising immediate satisfaction and quick relief. But perhaps the painful awareness of loneliness is an invitation to transcend our limitations and look beyond the boundaries of our existence. The awareness of loneliness might be a gift we must protect and guard, because our loneliness reveals to us an inner emptiness that can be destructive when misunderstood, but filled with promise for him who can tolerate its sweet pain… We easily relate to our human world with devastating expectations. We ignore what we already know… that no love or friendship, no intimate embrace or tender kiss, no community, commune or collective, no man or woman, will ever be able to satisfy our desire to be released from our lonely condition. This truth is so disconcerting and painful that we are more prone to play games with our fantasies than to face the truth of our existence.

-Father Henri Nouwen
Click to expand...
I also recently turned 24 and in the same boat so I can sort of relate, but you still have a lot of life to go and one of the most helpful things you can do in reconnecting to God and finding social connections is becoming involved in a Church community. Not just going to mass either, but finding a program to take part in as well if possible.
 
Dear jcl1904,

I have been praying for a friend for twenty some years. Someone I can talk to about God, the Bible, Church History, music, politics, art, and movies. Someone who will not laugh at my sometimes juvenile questions that I ask. Someone who will answer those questions and guide me in my understanding. Someone I can just “chew the fat” with on a nice summer’s evening. In my praying, I haven’t acquired a physical friend but I have grown closer a true friend, God. I don’t resent God for not answering my prayer the way I thought it should be answered; I have, in all the praying, grown closer to what is really important in life. I pray you will find your friend soon too.
 
  1. What God wants for you is not always what you think you want.
  2. Maybe God is trying to teach you patience. 24 is still very young. There is lots of time. In the meantime, you should try to grow closer to God and be the best person you can be, so if/when the right person comes along, you will be ready.
Sometimes, especially in our culture, we get so wrapped up in our own lives that we forget why we’re really here: to serve God.
 
I too suffered from depression at your age with few relationships and I can relate.

Whatever it is in your life you yearn for - to overcome fear of the social aspects of a church (a big one for me), to begin school for a degree (another biggie for me), or to search and obtain a job interview - write it on a 3" x 5" index card and fold it in your wallet. Write it as a personal contract to yourself, a promise to overcome that obstacle, and take it out and read it when you’re down. Add it to your Rosary each night and ask God to help you claim its’ promises by meditating on the decades and comparing your sufferings to Jesus’ suffering on the cross.

Remember that God owns the world and everything in it (Ps 24) and that if He wants you to have something, and He does, He will simply give it to you without navigating through confusion or making compromises. That includes the relationships that have brought you mental pain. When we ask something of God, He doesn’t give us a snake for a fish or a stone for a loaf of bread (Matt 7:9-10). His final rewards are not broken and need ‘fixing up’. But He does demand patience that sometimes overwhelms us.

Pray the Rosary each night and ask for Holy Mary’s interceeding prayers to help you through your struggles.
 
Lord, please move the heart of Jcl1904 to return to You in the Sacraments, where You can offer him/her the much needed healing and nourishment his/her soul truly needs. Please help Jcl1904 to know how important it is to You to have us attend the Mass and confession. May Jcl1904 come to find in Your Church a community of family to call his/her own. Bless Jcl1904 with good friends who care and love Jcl1904 in a great way. Thank you, Lord, for hearing my prayer. Amen.
 
Holy Mother Mary we pray

Hail Mary, full of grace.
The Lord is with thee.
Blessed art thou among women,
and blessed is the fruit of thy womb,
Jesus.
Holy Mary, Mother of God,
pray for us sinners,
now and at the hour of our death.
Amen.
 
Remember Jcl1904, WE are your family. I meditate on the Scourging at the Pillar whenever I feel my faith flagging or my attention wavering. Seek confession and the Bread of Life.

Sing to him, sing his praise,
proclaim all his wondrous deeds.
Glory in his holy name;
rejoice, O hearts that seek the LORD!
The Lord remembers his covenant for ever.
 
Thank you all for your Kindness and words. I went to Mass today for the first time in a while and found myself feeling much calmer after praying with God. I will be attending regularly in order to regain my closeness with God.
 
Since you have posted this in prayer intentions, I am going to say a prayer for you …
 
Hail Mary, full of grace.
The Lord is with thee.
Blessed art thou among women,
and blessed is the fruit of thy womb,
Jesus.
Holy Mary, Mother of God,
pray for us sinners,
now and at the hour of our death.
Amen.
 
Hail Mary, full of grace.
The Lord is with thee.
Blessed art thou among women,
and blessed is the fruit of thy womb,
Jesus.
Holy Mary, Mother of God,
pray for us sinners,
now and at the hour of our death.
Amen.
 
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