Feeling sick

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seekingone

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This is my first time here, I stopped by my church to see if I could talk to my priest, but it’s the Easter Season and there was no priest in the office. I did something that I thought was the right thing to do. A woman that lived in my neighborhood was losing her house in the middle of a divorce and had two children I got her a job with the help of my brother who recommended her only on my advice, I helped her moved, had a baby shower for her daughter because I thought she could not afford it and got her daughter a job at the school that I work for because I thought it would it would be good for the family. The mother that I helped, wreck a van that she was driving, failed a drug test and is looking forward to unemployment! I did not tell anyone about what I did for this family, but I did ask my brother for outside help, that I think might hurt him in the end. What should I do, feeling very sick to my stomach!!!
 
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seekingone:
This is my first time here, I stopped by my church to see if I could talk to my priest, but it’s the Easter Season and there was no priest in the office. I did something that I thought was the right thing to do. A woman that lived in my neighborhood was losing her house in the middle of a divorce and had two children I got her a job with the help of my brother who recommended her only on my advice, I helped her moved, had a baby shower for her daughter because I thought she could not afford it and got her daughter a job at the school that I work for because I thought it would it would be good for the family. The mother that I helped, wreck a van that she was driving, failed a drug test and is looking forward to unemployment! I did not tell anyone about what I did for this family, but I did ask my brother for outside help, that I think might hurt him in the end. What should I do, feeling very sick to my stomach!!!
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Hello and Welcome…

You sound very hurt and I can understand that…please try and find someone who knows you that can help…maybe a friend at church or someone close…Remember to pray…that will help…

God Bless
 
you didn’t do anything wrong. you were trying to help. it may have spiraled downward, but i think you are in the clear. sometimes situations just end up stinking. not your fault.

my 2 cents.

happy Easter.
 
God judges us on our intentions, not the result.

Your acts of kindness may seem to have failed, but this woman may remember it when she is sober–it might change her life.

You treated this woman as if she was the least of your sisters. You saw Christ in her. You ministered to Christ through her.

Jesus is pleased. Jesus is more than pleased with you.

Pray, pray, pray for this woman.
 
Yes, I agree with the above two. In fact you are probably to be praised for your charity. I would not worry about it a bit. You probably learned to be more careful next time though.
 
Thank you all for responding to me, I broke down last night and just cried all night, I don’t know if I was crying for myself or for this family. I felt better this morning, and pray that I will again help someone if I can. I don’t want to be like so many people and ignore the plight of others because it’s safer, even though this time was a very painful experience. Thank you again, I’m glad I found this site.
 
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seekingone:
This is my first time here, I stopped by my church to see if I could talk to my priest, but it’s the Easter Season and there was no priest in the office. I did something that I thought was the right thing to do. A woman that lived in my neighborhood was losing her house in the middle of a divorce and had two children I got her a job with the help of my brother who recommended her only on my advice, I helped her moved, had a baby shower for her daughter because I thought she could not afford it and got her daughter a job at the school that I work for because I thought it would it would be good for the family. The mother that I helped, wreck a van that she was driving, failed a drug test and is looking forward to unemployment! I did not tell anyone about what I did for this family, but I did ask my brother for outside help, that I think might hurt him in the end. What should I do, feeling very sick to my stomach!!!
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Seekingone:

You did nothing wrong. You saw someone in need and you tried to help them as best as you could.

*Then the king will say to those on his right, ‘Come, you who are blessed by my Father. Inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world. For I was hungry and you gave me food, I was thirsty and you gave me drink, a stranger and you welcomed me, naked and you clothed me, ill and you cared for me, in prison and you visited me.’

Then the righteous will answer him and say, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you drink?When did we see you a stranger and welcome you, or naked and clothe you? When did we see you ill or in prison, and visit you?’

And the king will say to them in reply, ‘Amen, I say to you, whatever you did for one of these least brothers of mine, you did for me.’ Matt. 25:35-40*

We can almost never know that someone is going to screw up the chance we give them, only that they look like they really need some help.

Let your brother know what happened so that he can limit the damage to himself, but you did nthing wrong. The lady you tried to help - She’s the one who blew it. You did exactly what our Lord would have wanted you to do.

Peace be with you.

In Christ, Michael
 
Naievety is not, thank heavens, a sin. You got worked, and you may be feeling ashamed of it; but you have lots of very good company.

One should not become a raging cynic because of this, but perhaps next time you might want to do a little discrete invesitgation before you charge off “saving” someone.

Charity is all well and good, and I do not suggest otherwise, but particularly if you are involving others in the charitable action towards some third party, you might make sure that the need is genuine, particularly if you are going to such lengths.

The Gospel mandate of being “wise as serpents” comes to mind.
 
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seekingone:
Thank you all for responding to me, I broke down last night and just cried all night, I don’t know if I was crying for myself or for this family. I felt better this morning, and pray that I will again help someone if I can. I don’t want to be like so many people and ignore the plight of others because it’s safer, even though this time was a very painful experience. Thank you again, I’m glad I found this site.
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Seekingone:

Most people don’t help because it’s just easier not to, and it’s also less risky. Unless you’re used to dealing with drug addicts, yo had no way of knowing wheher or not this woman was a drug addict or whether or not this woman would betray the trust given her.

Please, don’t let that get to you. Tell your brother what happened and apologize to him if you have to, but I really don’t think you did anything wrong.

In Christ, Michael
 
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