Feeling uncomfortable in "face to face" confession

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westcoast

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How do you avoid feeling uncomfortable in the face to face confession? I have to do it and feel weird about seeing the priest later that day and talking to him “normally” because now he knows who I am and all the sinful stuff I do! I know everyone sins, but still, it’s uncomfortable to me. The “screen” is not an option.
 
The screen should always be an option. It’s a requirement of the Church. Could you ask your pastor about it?
 
the screen has to be an option, and no, the priest does not remember you or what you said if you meet him later. do you think your doctor is thinking about what you look like naked if you meet him socially. get over it, meditate on the wonder and grace of this sacrament, and give thanks for it.
 
I’ve been told that most priests are gifted with the ability to completely forget what was told to them in confession. Also, if I was a priest, I think I would be really glad to see that person and think “Hey, they were just in confession! Their soul must be so nice and white right now. Isn’t that awesome?” or “Hey, that guy! He was really brave yesterday, confessing what he did. He must feel great, getting that off his soul.” or something else like that. But that’s just me. 😛

Also, I think you have the right to request an anonymous, screened confession.
 
It might be good to befriend the priest you are confessing to, or find a permanent confessor. By doing this your natural inclination of nervousness should decline, and you will feel more comfortable. It took me along time to be able to confess some sins, but with persistence and understanding it became a lot easier.
 
westcoast said:
How do you avoid feeling uncomfortable in the face to face confession? I have to do it and feel weird about seeing the priest later that day and talking to him “normally” because now he knows who I am and all the sinful stuff I do! I know everyone sins, but still, it’s uncomfortable to me. The “screen” is not an option.
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Speaking ONLY for myself, I have full faith and trust in “The Seal Of Confession”. My very first confession, at age 62, was last February. An hour long session, face to face, with a very non-judgemental Priest, who said I had done well for a first time. :o
 
westcoast said:
How do you avoid feeling uncomfortable in the face to face confession? I have to do it and feel weird about seeing the priest later that day and talking to him “normally” because now he knows who I am and all the sinful stuff I do! I know everyone sins, but still, it’s uncomfortable to me. The “screen” is not an option.
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Why is a traditional confessional not an option?
 
because it’s at a big gathering outdoors, lots of priests available and they have different languages and there aren’t any booths since it’s outside… thanks for alll the replies. I know, I need to gt over it.
 
Well, if it’s a large gathering, many people will be confessing, and I’ll bet everything just runs together for the priest and he won’t be able to connect anyone with their sins, even if he wanted to, which he won’t. (Just like this huge run-on sentence!) Believe me, no matter how much you may think so, your sins are not unique.

Betsy
 
westcoast said:
because it’s at a big gathering outdoors, lots of priests available and they have different languages and there aren’t any booths since it’s outside… thanks for alll the replies. I know, I need to gt over it.
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Go to confession at another time, in the Church, in a confessional.
 
westcoast said:
because it’s at a big gathering outdoors, lots of priests available and they have different languages and there aren’t any booths since it’s outside… thanks for alll the replies. I know, I need to gt over it.
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I’m with you…I MUCH prefer the screen and will travel across town to find one if I have to!

At a gathering like you describe, the priests will often sit in a corner with a chair in front AND behind them to give people the option. Or a kneeler will be placed behind his back. Or you could kneel on the floor behind the priest and ask him if it’s OK for you to confess that way. They’ve heard it all.
 
westcoast said:
How do you avoid feeling uncomfortable in the face to face confession? I have to do it and feel weird about seeing the priest later that day and talking to him “normally” because now he knows who I am and all the sinful stuff I do! I know everyone sins, but still, it’s uncomfortable to me. The “screen” is not an option.
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My confessor happens to be a good friend of mine…and I have told him things that I never thought I would tell anyone. Once I had to tell him a real biggie and was so embarassed and felt he would think of me differently and not want to be friends anymore. It took me a few weeks before I got the courage. He knew I wanted to make an embarassing confession and even suggested that I go anonymously to another priest but I trusted him. Still I was afraid. That was 7 years ago and we are still good friends, in fact we are closer now than we were 7 years ago. I think we make ourselves anxious. The priest is there to reconcile you to God and he is happy when that happens, and it should not affect how he feels about you, no matter how bad the sin is that you confessed…unless maybe you confess stealing his car.😉
 
Hmm, I used to be so intimidated by confession, but lately I’ve found it’s one of the most peaceful activities!

The reason I am uncomfortable with face to face is, maybe it’s ADHD, maybe just oversensitivity, but I find I can’t stop wanting to socialize and connect with the priest instead of focusing on confessing to God. I’ll find myself thinking about the watch he’s wearing, or how his day was, etc. 😃 :o
 
Just had a wonderful experience. I was at the National Shrine of the Immaculate Conception and priests were hearing confessions in many of the little side shrines. So as you walked about the church, you saw a priest sitting on the steps of the little shrine and someone kneeling beside them basically whispering their confession into the priest’s ear. It was like that famous photo of priests hearing confessions all around St Peter’s square. Of course, these were not necessarily that person’s parish priest–in fact probably not. But the priest you confess to is not an ordinary person. In that moment, they are acting as Christ, who offers perfect mercy.
 
My first confession was a face to face confession. As I walked in the confessional room, there was a screen and the priest was sitting on the other side. I asked him “Where should I sit?” and Father said “I’d prefer if you sat over here.” Being that it was my first confession, I did what he said.

Whether or not there is a screen invovled, the grace in the sacrement is undeniable. Talking with priests in general about confession, they see it as a joyous occasion. That **you **want to go to God, and that **you **want to make things right with him.

Next to the Eucharist, confession is my favorite sacrament. It’s something my non-Catholic friends and family just don’t understand.

From personal experience, even the oldest, most conservative priest I ever confessed to didn’t judge me based on my sins. I heard one once say something to the affect of “I don’t want to remember your sins…I don’t even want to remember my sins.”

Keep in mind, it is not the priest forvgiving you…it is God that is forgiving you. God is just acting through the priest!

At least that is my understanding…someone correct me if I’m wrong.
 
I prefer behind the screen as well, but I made my first confession face to face (since I had made an appointment so he knew I was coming) and it wasn’t bad at all. Also, I was in line the other day and the lady in front of me was done and the priest walked out for a second to one of the pews so he saw me sitting there and I went face to face that time. He was extra nice that time because he didn’t mean to see me sitting there! :o

But on the other hand, one time I went behind the screen and it was so quiet I wasn’t sure if he was back there or not so I leaned to the side to see if I could see his feet!!😛 The way our confessional is set up I could see his feet without him seeing me but the funny thing is I almost fell off the kneeler trying to make sure he was there!😃 Can you imagine the embarrassment if I had!!:blushing:
 
westcoast said:
How do you avoid feeling uncomfortable in the face to face confession? I have to do it and feel weird about seeing the priest later that day and talking to him “normally” because now he knows who I am and all the sinful stuff I do! I know everyone sins, but still, it’s uncomfortable to me. The “screen” is not an option.
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That is correct. The Screen is NOT an option, it must always be available. It’s required by Canon Law to be available for anyone who wants to use it! If there is no screen there tell the priest to go get one and you will come back later.
 
westcoast said:
because it’s at a big gathering outdoors, lots of priests available and they have different languages and there aren’t any booths since it’s outside… thanks for alll the replies. I know, I need to gt over it.
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I go to Confession every time I visit a certain shrine and confessions are all outside on the lawn and there are free standing dividers with kneelers and screens for every priest.
 
I went into a confessional in another city once and there definitely was a screen. The only thing was, you had to walk past the priest to get to it…🤷
 
I always go to face to face confessions…though the main reason is because of my hillbilly accent. They would know it was me anyways:shrug: I’m the only person that I’ve met in my parish that has such a bad accent…what do you do?😃
 
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