Feeling Very Weak Under Temptation

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Around four months ago I’ve decided to stop masturbating this year after 6 years of doing the sin. I’ve realized that I was becoming addicted to it and felt that I needed to stop because it was ruining my life. Even though I’ve encountered temptations before, I’ve been doing well in combating them. Until today. It seems I’m now currently at a point where I’m being tempted to return again.

I met this guy at a talk who is no longer religious and the theme was about sexuality. He was part of the audience like me. He also had the same problem as me but he was using porn (I have never watched porn), however he was experiencing this when he was religious at the time and he said it was the lowest point of his life. It was a cycle he said: he would do the deed, confess, pray and then when he went to his lowest point he would give in and the cycle continues. When he stopped being religious he said he no longer experienced such temptations and slowly lost the impulse to watch porn. He also pointed an article from a popular science journal that religious people are more likely to watch porn compulsively.

No offense to him but I felt that he was indirectly suggesting me to leave God so I can better handle these temptations. I’ve been doing so hard to achieve quitting masturbation through lots and lots of deep prayer and he seems to suggest that i should throw that away. I know there are lots of religious people who conquered this sin and stayed religious - and even becoming even more religious after (including me). It’s just that this case is something I have never heard before.

I know I shouldn’t return to masturbating again because I know that it just ruins me as a person and my relationship with God. But his story is, ironically, tempting me to give in to my temptations because I’m more likely to do so because I’m religious. And in one way the story tempts me into leave my faith, which I hold on so dearly in my life, so that I can get rid of these temptations once and for all.

And on top of that I’m distracted by all of this while trying to study for my Philosophy oral test. I don’t want to give in to these temptations and I don’t want to leave my faith and my relationship with God behind. Please pray for me so I can have spiritual peace and strength to fight these temptations off.
 
An update:

I gave into my temptations and masturbated. I felt worse than before and more distracted than before. The devil is having a stronger hold on me again. I have to go to confession soon. But in the meantime please don’t stop praying for me; I really need your prayers.
 
St. Michael the Archangel,
defend us in battle.
Be our defense against the wickedness and snares of the Devil.
May God rebuke him, we humbly pray,
and do thou,
O Prince of the heavenly hosts,
by the power of God,
thrust into hell Satan,
and all the evil spirits,
who prowl about the world
seeking the ruin of souls.

Amen.
 
In addition to prayer, I’d also suggest doing some auto suggestion. Sit down in a quiet place. Relax yourself. Concentrate on your breathing. Lips slightly parted. Exhale and inhale rhythmically and deeply. Repeat to yourself: “Through the eyes of Jesus on the cross, I see myself free from the habit of masturbating”. Joyfully visualise that you have already overcome the habit and are going from strength to strength in your religious life.
Do this daily for about 10 minutes before starting your day. Repeat for 3-weeks and by then the desire to masturbate would have completely disappeared!
Will keep you in prayer.
 
***Hail Mary,
Full of Grace,
The Lord is with thee.
Blessed art thou among women,
and blessed is the fruit
of thy womb,
Jesus.
Holy Mary,
Mother of God,
pray for us sinners now,
and at the hour of our death
Amen.

:crossrc:***
 
Praying to the Holy Spirit to give you guidance, direction, strength, fortitude & wisdom to overcome your temptations.
 
It sounds like it has been a long haul for you.
You are studying philosophy; might I suggest you take it on in a different light, rather than studying philosophy, become a “student” of St. Thomas Aquinas, meaning accepting everything he says, looking into your own life to see the reality of what he says within you, meaning see your soul as he describes it, your habits according to his definitions, your intellect and will per his words. See your own internals like Thomas would see his internals.
Read the Summa Theologica, not to inform yourself what Thomas thought, but to yourself think and believe what Thomas thought and believed.
If you don’t have this work, you can read it here: ccel.org/ccel/aquinas/summa

You will in the end understand yourself, your desires, and your sin, and take that understanding with you to the Book of James where you will find your desires (in will and appetites) are the testing ground of turning to God or turning to yourself in your “pre-thinking” about self-satisfaction of desires, with the goal of perseverance in trusting God to provide for you when you are “hungry”.

Make your philosophy work for you, join yourself to Thomas as his willing pupil.
 
John_Martin said:
It sounds like it has been a long haul for you.
You are studying philosophy; might I suggest you take it on in a different light, rather than studying philosophy, become a “student” of St. Thomas Aquinas, meaning accepting everything he says, looking into your own life to see the reality of what he says within you, meaning see your soul as he describes it, your habits according to his definitions, your intellect and will per his words. See your own internals like Thomas would see his internals.
Read the Summa Theologica, not to inform yourself what Thomas thought, but to yourself think and believe what Thomas thought and believed.
If you don’t have this work, you can read it here: ccel.org/ccel/aquinas/summa

You will in the end understand yourself, your desires, and your sin, and take that understanding with you to the Book of James where you will find your desires (in will and appetites) are the testing ground of turning to God or turning to yourself in your “pre-thinking” about self-satisfaction of desires, with the goal of perseverance in trusting God to provide for you when you are “hungry”.

Make your philosophy work for you, join yourself to Thomas as his willing pupil.
Click to expand...
Thanks. 🙂

Thanks also to all the others who have prayed for me. Please continue to do so as I’m still in this state of sin while waiting for confession.

Actually St. Thomas Aquinas was mentioned in my readings, saying that man is the union of his flesh-and-bones body and his soul while being distinct from each other; wherever the body is or does the soul is also there or is doing the same thing. Gabriel Marcel, a Catholic philosopher of more recent times who is more featured in my readings, says that body is not an instrument which one can use as a possession since it cannot be separated from myself (almost similar to what St. Thomas Aquinas was saying).

The devil tried to tempt me into using my body as an instrument; I gave in and now my soul is soiled. 😦
 
Our Father who art in Heaven,
Hallowed be thy name.
Thy kingdom come, thy will be done
on Earth as it is in Heaven.
Give us this day our daily bread.
And forgive us our trespasses,
as we forgive those who trespass against us.
And lead us not into temptation,
but deliver us from evil.
Amen. :signofcross:

Hail Mary, full of grace,
the Lord is with thee.
Blessed are you among women,
and blessed is the fruit of your womb Jesus.
Holy Mary, Mother of God,
pray for us sinners,
now and at the hour of our death.
Amen. :signofcross:
 
CatholicWhovian said:
Thanks. 🙂

Thanks also to all the others who have prayed for me. Please continue to do so as I’m still in this state of sin while waiting for confession.

Actually St. Thomas Aquinas was mentioned in my readings, saying that man is the union of his flesh-and-bones body and his soul while being distinct from each other; wherever the body is or does the soul is also there or is doing the same thing. Gabriel Marcel, a Catholic philosopher of more recent times who is more featured in my readings, says that body is not an instrument which one can use as a possession since it cannot be separated from myself (almost similar to what St. Thomas Aquinas was saying).

The devil tried to tempt me into using my body as an instrument; I gave in and now my soul is soiled. 😦
Click to expand...
It is not quite what you think, which is why I suggest you BE Thomas’ pupil, on your own time, rather than having a comparison of ideas.

What really happened? If you are Thomas’ faithful pupil, you will see this about yourself, not as a mechanical description:
The appetitive part of your soul (like the other animals have) rather than your will (which is the intellective appetite peculiar to the human animal) desired satisfaction. This prompt moved your reason (not intellectually) to analyze means to that end, not with the consideration of right or wrong, but with the consideration of the likelihood that and whether satisfaction would occur. This “pre-thinking” or visualizing of attaining satisfaction seemed that it would be successful and the appetite began moving the body (habitually) to matching the visualization, without any intelligent thought of whether it is right or wrong. And body movement is the appetite and/or will moving the body into the actualizing what it loves in material reality, so it is more than just an object in the soul, but is also an object the body can sense and confirm the real being of the object. And so you have actualized sin. And now, your intellect, your intelligent reason suddenly kicks in, and you look at your actualized reality and say, “this is not good.” Your appetite did not ask what is good beyond the specific desire, nor did your pre-thinking about satisfaction. But your intelligent reason, being more all-encompassing than a particular appetite does see that you fell for a lie about “happiness”, about “satisfaction”, about what is “good” for you.
And, in the future, you will seek to recognize “pre-thinking”, the words and visualizations and rehearsals that happen automatically in your conscious thought (which is not the soul) and you will seek to stop this thinking and visualizing and rehearsing, and instead turn in prayer to God and say, “Lord, I am desiring satisfaction of this, please provide for all I need”. Then you will go and do some other thing that really needs to be done, like reading the next question of the Summa, perhaps.
 
Well, of course the non- religious guy stopped having temptations to masturbate and watch porn. The devil had gotten what he truly wanted- this man’s soul alienated from God. Once that was accomplished, he no longer needed to tempt him through the flesh anymore.

God does not look at the success of our intentions or actions. He looks at our effort. He looks at our willingness to fight. He knows what a struggle and hardship this particular vice is for you. He knows that you are discouraged when you fail. And sometimes, you will fail and fall into sin. That is why He instituted the sacrament of confession.
When you fall, it is so important to get back up and keep trying. This separates you from the warriors who have given up and “died” in mortal sin, from those who keep fighting the foe to win everlasting life.

Praying for you…
 
Saint Michael, the archangel, defend us in battle, be our defense against the wickedness and snares of the devil, may God rebuke him, we humbly pray. And do you, O’ Prince of the Heavenly host, by the power of God thrust into Hell Satan and all the other evil spirits who prowl about the world for the ruin of souls.

Amen.

†

Our Father who art in Heaven, hallowed be thy name.

Thy kingdom come, thy will be done on Earth as it is in Heaven.

Give us this day our daily bread.

And forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us.

And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil.

Amen.

†

Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with thee.

Blessed are you among women, and blessed is the fruit of your womb Jesus.

Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners, now and at the hour of our death.

Amen.

†
 
In addition to praying, take up some form of exercise because some of the same endorphins will be released. I know its not the same but it can help.
 
Hi CatholicWhovian,

Try not to get too discouraged. I have said this before, but we all fall down. The important thing to do–which is what you are doing–is to pick ourselves up, and to keep on trying, and to not give up. :console:

I have mentioned this too on the forum, but whenever I have felt troubled, I would go to Adoration before the Blessed Sacrament when I could. If I couldn’t get to Adoration, I would go to Mass early and sit quietly in church and pray before Mass started, and spend extra time with the Lord. These were times that would help to calm and comfort me.

Prayers said for you, dear one.

May God bless you during your struggles.
 
Don’t give up, keep fighting. You’re not alone. For me the toughest time is early in the morning. Sometimes as mentioned on here from Thomas Aquinas works, the body will act out and do it without you really wanting to. Persevere and you will be successful.
 
Prayers coming your way!

The thing about “scientific studies” is that you can find one to support pretty much any theory. I wouldn’t put much weight on one person’s experience.

When I experience the temptation, the best thing I can do is get up and take a walk. Pray while you walk. That’s my suggestion. When you come back from your walk find a different location to study (or whatever) so going back to the same place doesn’t trigger the habit.

The deeper you enter into prayer life the stronger you get against sin. If you (or the person you talked to) only prayed in times of temptation, your soul isn’t being strengthened. So my second piece of advice is to enter into daily prayer where you just lift your heart to God without concern for the sin.

The temptation never goes away. We’re fallen human beings. But you can grow stronger against it by natural means and by supernatural means. But the best way is to grow closer to God and let His Spirit fill you.

I still struggle too. But I get stronger all the time. You can do it!
 
Thanks again for your prayers guys. I just finished my oral exam earlier, and I picked a thesis statement which I didn’t studied that much yesterday - because I gave into my temptations. It was manageable but still I feel I should have done better. This is why I hate this sin. It ruins my studies.

:signofcross:

Soul of Christ, sanctify me; Body of Christ, save me; Blood of Christ, inebriate me; Water from the side of Christ, wash me; Passion of Christ, strengthen me; O good Jesus, hear me; within Thy wounds, hide me; let me never be separated from Thee; from the evil one, deliver me; at the hour of my death, call me and bid me come to Thee, that with Thy saints, I may praise Thee forever and ever. Amen.

:signofcross:
 
Praying that the Lord may grant you strength against this temptation. Also praying for all necessary graces for you.

O Blood and Water, which gushed forth from the Heart of Jesus as a fountain of Mercy for us, I trust in You!
 
Praying.

I have struggled with this problem a lot and have not had any problems recently, but I will share you all the things I have tried that have helped me.
  1. Pray and ask God for help (but don’t just sit there and leave it at that).
  2. Go to an area where people can see you. DO NOT ISOLATE YOURSELF if you are feeling tempted.
  3. Listen to music, or an audiobook, or something where you intently can focus on the words or pattern.
  4. Watch videos on closertotruth.com
  5. Remember that sexuality is about giving yourself to another person… when you masturbate, you aren’t giving yourself to anyone–and if you intend to get married, you are refusing to wait to give yourself to your spouse in the marital act.
  6. Before I go to bed, I tape my right hand (dominant hand) with electrical tape because sometimes I have woken up masturbating. So you might also consider taping your hand. (and I sleep on my stomach)
Those are all things that have helped me.
 
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