Fighting impure thoughts-PLEASE HELP

[mymamamary]

Today, at MASS, after i went to confession (i go weekly), I served MASS. Now, here is my question. there were two girls there and i averted my gaze so as not to fall danger of failed custody of the eyes. However, i had a very stupid thought, and it evolved into another thought very fast, and i was horrified! i felt like jumping out of my servers cassock!! I was so scared and terrified. I tried to fight it, and i didnt enjoy it one bit, oh boy, i was so anxious and worried. Normally, i love MASS, but this kind of ruined it for me today, i recieved OUR LORD and i dont know whether or not i was in a state of grace. How do i know i consented? am i in danger of hell right now? Should i go to confession tommorrow, becuase if i do, i will! I hope i didnt recieve our LORD in a state of mortal sin!! How evil, I was terrifed, it was already hot, then i started to sweat even more! I was dismayedf and my being at MASS today was miserable as i was scared the whole time of me being damned to hell. I think i even asked the LORD where he was, Why would HE allow me to be subject to this kind of thought, in holy MASS? I hated the thoughts and i may hate myself if it was a mortal sin. I calmed down a bit after, and right now, im pretty calm

so was this a mortal sin??

i hope i didnt consent

How do i know i consented??

PLEASE HELP!!

 

[Love_is]

Trust me, I know how you feel. But no, it’s just concupiscence. If you didn’t want to think about it then it wasn’t a mortal sin. Though I can’t tell you how to fight them…I myself just sent an e-mail asking my spiritual director how to combat the concupiscence…If you want, I’ll let you know what he says
Remember that a mortal sin must have knowledge, full consent and grave matter.

 

[lssanjose]

Trust me, I know how you feel. But no, it’s just concupiscence. If you didn’t want to think about it then it wasn’t a mortal sin. Though I can’t tell you how to fight them…I myself just sent an e-mail asking my spiritual director how to combat the concupiscence…If you want, I’ll let you know what he says
Remember that a mortal sin must have knowledge, full consent and grave matter.

This.

I wouldn’t sweat it. From what you posted, you sound contrite in what you did, in thought. Just go to confession, as to not become enslaved in the thought of having committed sin (mortal, or otherwise). Absolution is a great feeling.

 

[Spirithound]

I do not believe that you are in a state of mortal sin. You took actions to avert your gaze, and you are committed to working to control your thoughts. Peace

 

[JeraldW]

This, my brother, is called temptation to lust. I know how this is, it will occur till we men are dead! just take each thought and throw it away like a blink of a eye. Any persistent ones, pray a Hail Mary. This is what I have been told by a couple of holy confessors, As long as you do not dwell on them or do not resist, it is not a mortal sin. .

 

[Catholic80]

Today, at MASS, after i went to confession (i go weekly), I served MASS. Now, here is my question. there were two girls there and i averted my gaze so as not to fall danger of failed custody of the eyes. However, i had a very stupid thought, and it evolved into another thought very fast, and i was horrified! i felt like jumping out of my servers cassock!! I was so scared and terrified. I tried to fight it, and i didnt enjoy it one bit, oh boy, i was so anxious and worried. Normally, i love MASS, but this kind of ruined it for me today, i recieved OUR LORD and i dont know whether or not i was in a state of grace. How do i know i consented? am i in danger of hell right now? Should i go to confession tommorrow, becuase if i do, i will! I hope i didnt recieve our LORD in a state of mortal sin!! How evil, I was terrifed, it was already hot, then i started to sweat even more! I was dismayedf and my being at MASS today was miserable as i was scared the whole time of me being damned to hell. I think i even asked the LORD where he was, Why would HE allow me to be subject to this kind of thought, in holy MASS? I hated the thoughts and i may hate myself if it was a mortal sin. I calmed down a bit after, and right now, im pretty calm

so was this a mortal sin??

i hope i didnt consent

How do i know i consented??

PLEASE HELP!!

It seems to me you are having anxiety about potentially having immoral thoughts, and by dwelling on not having them, you are having them, which only leads you to more anxiety. It’s a vicious cycle.

Think what would happen if an adult were to tell a child, “don’t have impure thoughts about xyz,” proceeded to explain the impurities in detail, and then told the child, “these things are sinful.” What is that adult doing but making the child have impure thoughts.
I think that is what is happening to you. You are telling yourself, “don’t have these thoughts.” and by telling yourself not to have them, you are having them.

This is my theory about it:
Pleasant, sexual feelings are one reaction to impure thoughts; anxious feelings are another reaction to sexual thoughts. Both are strong feelings and both are addictive and both can lead us into sin. The latter is caused from an imperfect desire not to sin. I say “imperfect” because I think the anxiety comes from our believing we are in control - rather than God. We believe we can master temptation alone and without God, and then we have anxiety because our “subconscious” knows we can’t master this sin alone. It recognizes it’s own weakness and it’s cry for help comes out in the form of anxiety. So, by trying to conquer sin on our own, we fall into more temptation and more sin. It’s not the sin we might think (giving in and desiring the sexual act) but the sin of pride (thinking we can do things on our own) This eventually will lead us to despair, because the anxiety will grow and we won’t be able to stop the temptations. We might think, “all this struggle, and I have only gotten worse… I only fall into more sin… I want to turn to God, but He’s not helping me…” And this is where the true temptation lies… we give up and despair and stop trusting God. He was there all along, but instead of surrendering, we tried to do things on our own.

My suggestion to you is to relax, don’t worry about the temptations or give them a second thought, and distract yourself. Think about good things.

 

[Mintaka]

If you’d been having another kind of distracted thought – say, if you’d started thinking about some computer game – you wouldn’t have been so horrified about it. You just would have pulled your thoughts back to the task at hand.

That is what you should do with impure thoughts. Don’t give them power over you; just start thinking again about the task at hand.

Don’t panic. You’ll wear ruts in your brain.

Here’s another way to think about it. Your brain is sort of like a big pipe; it’s full of all kinds of things flowing in from the outside. Some of them are good; some of them are garbage. If you don’t like a garbage thought that’s running down the pipe toward you, don’t pick it out of the pipe and look at it and smell it. Just let it float down the pipe and back out of your brain. Same thing with dreams. If you don’t want it, just let go of it.

 

[MHT32]

You’re 16, of course your going to have impure thoughts. What makes it a sin is if you intentionally think of them and dont try to stop thinking about it. Dont worry, you’re fine

 

[JaredR]

If you’d been having another kind of distracted thought – say, if you’d started thinking about some computer game – you wouldn’t have been so horrified about it. You just would have pulled your thoughts back to the task at hand.

That is what you should do with impure thoughts. Don’t give them power over you; just start thinking again about the task at hand.

Don’t panic. You’ll wear ruts in your brain.

Here’s another way to think about it. Your brain is sort of like a big pipe; it’s full of all kinds of things flowing in from the outside. Some of them are good; some of them are garbage. If you don’t like a garbage thought that’s running down the pipe toward you, don’t pick it out of the pipe and look at it and smell it. Just let it float down the pipe and back out of your brain. Same thing with dreams. If you don’t want it, just let go of it.

That’s true. Giving too much attention to impure thoughts, even when you are rejecting them, can give them power. Next time (and probably when you’re not at Mass) try counting to 210 by multiples of 7. If the thought returns when you’re done, try counting to 360 by multiples of 9. If it returns after that, count to 600 by multiples of 5. I’m sure you get the picture. I like using numbers, but maybe you could think of some other technique. The point is to give yourself a quick mental task that is easy but engaging enough to steal your bra(name removed by moderator)ower away from the impure suggestion.

Remember you do not want to focus on suppressing the thought; you want to focus on moving your attention elsewhere. Trying not to think of something is only more likely to make you think of it. Distraction is more effective.

 

[HisIsTheCrown]

Today, at MASS, after i went to confession (i go weekly), I served MASS. Now, here is my question. there were two girls there and i averted my gaze so as not to fall danger of failed custody of the eyes. However, i had a very stupid thought, and it evolved into another thought very fast, and i was horrified! i felt like jumping out of my servers cassock!! I was so scared and terrified. I tried to fight it, and i didnt enjoy it one bit, oh boy, i was so anxious and worried. Normally, i love MASS, but this kind of ruined it for me today, i recieved OUR LORD and i dont know whether or not i was in a state of grace. How do i know i consented? am i in danger of hell right now? Should i go to confession tommorrow, becuase if i do, i will! I hope i didnt recieve our LORD in a state of mortal sin!! How evil, I was terrifed, it was already hot, then i started to sweat even more! I was dismayedf and my being at MASS today was miserable as i was scared the whole time of me being damned to hell. I think i even asked the LORD where he was, Why would HE allow me to be subject to this kind of thought, in holy MASS? I hated the thoughts and i may hate myself if it was a mortal sin. I calmed down a bit after, and right now, im pretty calm

so was this a mortal sin??

i hope i didnt consent

How do i know i consented??

PLEASE HELP!!

Do not control your thoughts. You cannot do that, no one can do that.
Can you control the sea?
One thing is the thoughts that come to your mind another things is your desire to intentionally, without any thoughts, go after them…
As much as you try to control them, as much they will kill you…
The sexual thoughts do not follow orders, timetables, calendars, schedules, meetings, interviews, opportunities, protocol, conveniences…
They come to my mind in the most inconvenient times and many times I must control my laughter for it is so stupid to think those thoughts at that time and at that place that one must think that our mind is crazy, for instance, when serving at the altar…
Many times, for me, it is the opposite: I will look to the girls on purpose and in 15 seconds the thoughts disappear. Why? Because, the girls are not the thoughts and the thoughts are not the girls. Once you see just plain girls, the thoughts disappear because what you are thinking in the thoughts, those stupid thinks, are not there in front of you. On the contrary, you find very devotional girls, human persons, full of value and humanity. So the thoughts, which were crying “look at me, those girls are sex-objects”, those thoughts are defeated for you do not find sex-objects but devotional girls…