Filled with Hate

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23morgan

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I am absolutely filled with hate. I hate everyone and everything and I hate that I hate. I know that Jesus doesn’t want us to hate, but I can’t seem to help it. It’s an all encompassing general hate for humanity. I did not used to be this way. I used to be very optimistic and generally easy to get along with. I can’t p(name removed by moderator)oint when this hatred started exactly, but I’d say within the last five years, with increasing intensity in the last six months to a year. Does anyone have any suggestions as to how to quell this nastiness? I do not want to be like this.
Thank you.
 
When is that last time you went to Confession? Could you be in a state of mortal sin?
 
Veronica97 said:
When is that last time you went to Confession? Could you be in a state of mortal sin?
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At least five years ago. I did not consider that to be a coincidence until now. I am definitely in a state of mortal sin. I really do not think I could return to confession though. I guess I’ve got my answer. Thank you.
 
You can definitely always go back to confession. I pray that the Lord touches your heart and inspires you to go. You are holding everything inside and it will eat away at your body and soul. Best to let it out. You are going to feel so amazing and light and joyous and free afterwards.
 
Have you talked with your doctor about this? Constantly being angry and hateful towards everyone and everything is not normal and it may be a good idea to see if there’s a medical condition behind it. Other than that, getting enough sleep, proper nutrition, exercise, and prayer should all contribute to a more relaxed and peaceful day.
 
23morgan said:
At least five years ago. I did not consider that to be a coincidence until now. I am definitely in a state of mortal sin. I really do not think I could return to confession though. I guess I’ve got my answer. Thank you.
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Why do you think this?
 
Could be a symptom of something else going on in your life, doesn’t necessarily have to be something spiritual. If possible figure out why your angry. When I was in my early 20’s I was way more angry because I was having a hard time meeting someone and I internalized it. Also being in your 20’s is no picnic (for some reason I’m assuming you’re younger).

Also, don’t be afraid to go to confession. Go to a different parish if the anonymity makes you feel more comfortable.
 
23morgan,

Your sins and their gravity can be as numerous as the sands of a beach. But if you are repentant (as all of us should) and go to confession, there is no reason why you should think that Christ will never forgive you. To realize the splendour of God’s mercy, think of Christ’s parable of the prodigal son!

And besides, there’s not a thing that a priest hasn’t heard in confession. He’s there to absolve you and give you penance, not to judge you. Remember, a priest administers the sacrament (and all sacraments) in Persona Christi- in the person of Christ.

Here’s a little story: Saint Padre Pio was visited by an English woman for confession. But he closed the window screen in front of her face. And for a couple of days (or months, I can’t remember) she tried to go to confession, but he would do the same thing. Until one day she was able to confess, she asked why he did that. Saint Padre Pio said (now I’m paraphrasing here) that this how she treated Christ after all these years of not returning to Him for confession. She made Christ wait, now Christ made her wait.
In the end, she had a good spiritual conversion 🙂

So don’t underestimate the importance of confession!
 
23morgan said:
I am absolutely filled with hate. I hate everyone and everything and I hate that I hate. I know that Jesus doesn’t want us to hate, but I can’t seem to help it. It’s an all encompassing general hate for humanity. I did not used to be this way. I used to be very optimistic and generally easy to get along with. I can’t p(name removed by moderator)oint when this hatred started exactly, but I’d say within the last five years, with increasing intensity in the last six months to a year. Does anyone have any suggestions as to how to quell this nastiness? I do not want to be like this.
Thank you.
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If you don’t think you’re ready for confession just yet, go to an adoration chapel as soon as you can, and as often as you can. Just sit there, in the presence of Jesus. If you want to, you can ask Jesus to soften your heart, and give you the willingness to see your sins. Ask him to change your heart and heal your anger and pain. I think if you do this regularly, it won’t be long until you notice a change.

I will add you to my prayers.

p.s. You are part of humanity, and self-hatred is painful.
 
23morgan said:
I am absolutely filled with hate. I hate everyone and everything and I hate that I hate. I know that Jesus doesn’t want us to hate, but I can’t seem to help it. It’s an all encompassing general hate for humanity. I did not used to be this way. I used to be very optimistic and generally easy to get along with. I can’t p(name removed by moderator)oint when this hatred started exactly, but I’d say within the last five years, with increasing intensity in the last six months to a year. Does anyone have any suggestions as to how to quell this nastiness? I do not want to be like this.
Thank you.
Click to expand...
Could it be related to your circumstances in life? Maybe you are dissatisfied with your situation, and are just resentful of others for whatever reason? If that is the case you might want to make some changes to your life that will help change the situation. Figure out what specifically is making you feel this way, and change that.
 
TheRealJuliane said:
If you don’t think you’re ready for confession just yet, go to an adoration chapel as soon as you can, and as often as you can. Just sit there, in the presence of Jesus. If you want to, you can ask Jesus to soften your heart, and give you the willingness to see your sins. Ask him to change your heart and heal your anger and pain. I think if you do this regularly, it won’t be long until you notice a change.

I will add you to my prayers.

p.s. You are part of humanity, and self-hatred is painful.
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Good advice. I was at adoration one day and was overwhelmed with the desire to confess some sins that I “forgot” to confess in the past. They were very old sins from prior to my re-conversion so I never took them that seriously. I’d like to note that I really didn’t want to go but went anyway, confession should be painful to some extent (in my opinon). Think how much more painful it will be when you’re face to face with Christ. I’m thankful for confession and a patient God. :o

So I’ll second the advice to go to adoration.
 
I agree consult a Doctor for medication. Try listening to Joyce Meyer on enjoying everyday life. Maybe an exorcist is needed, if you are in mortal sin than not allowed to do confession till behavior stops. Maybe .
 
23morgan said:
I am absolutely filled with hate. I hate everyone and everything and I hate that I hate. I know that Jesus doesn’t want us to hate, but I can’t seem to help it. It’s an all encompassing general hate for humanity. I did not used to be this way. I used to be very optimistic and generally easy to get along with. I can’t p(name removed by moderator)oint when this hatred started exactly, but I’d say within the last five years, with increasing intensity in the last six months to a year. Does anyone have any suggestions as to how to quell this nastiness? I do not want to be like this.
Thank you.
Click to expand...
Dear OP: I hope you’re still out there.

We are getting pretty detailed about what to do spiritually, but we don’t know much about the situation in only two posts from the OP, and the second post makes it questionable whether the OP will even be back to this thread.

Is maybe your anger is being fueled by the “energy centers” of the false self? There are three.

One is power/control. Do other people get in the way of your plans? Do they try to dominate you?

One is security/comfort. Are you facing a threat to your financial or housing situation or other serious matter? Do other people get in between you and the things you want?

The third is affection/esteem. Do you have any relationships where you feel like you can share honesty? Do you feel like you have to put on a false front to deal with the fools around you?

When it is worst? Different times of day, or when certain things happen?

Let’s see if we can break this down and have a discussion over the symptoms?

Alan
 
+3 for adoration suggestion. That is a wondeful devotion. Whenever something is eating at me I go and give it all to Jesus. Also, pray the Divine Mercy chaplet. Ask for the hate to be taken away. I hope you will feel ready to go to confession soon and get rid of all that poison that sin pours into our souls. God bless.
 
AlanFromWichita said:
Dear OP: I hope you’re still out there.

We are getting pretty detailed about what to do spiritually, but we don’t know much about the situation in only two posts from the OP, and the second post makes it questionable whether the OP will even be back to this thread.

Is maybe your anger is being fueled by the “energy centers” of the false self? There are three.

One is power/control. Do other people get in the way of your plans? Do they try to dominate you?

One is security/comfort. Are you facing a threat to your financial or housing situation or other serious matter? Do other people get in between you and the things you want?

The third is affection/esteem. Do you have any relationships where you feel like you can share honesty? Do you feel like you have to put on a false front to deal with the fools around you?

When it is worst? Different times of day, or when certain things happen?

Let’s see if we can break this down and have a discussion over the symptoms?

Alan
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I work from home and I live alone, so there is no dominance and for the most part I get to control my day, work etc. In terms of security, it feels as though the world is coming apart at the seams, we are so divided as people, our culture has become so materialistic and selfish that I often see no hope for the future. Not just my own, but everyone’s. Relationships… I have none. It’s difficult to be in relationships when angry all of the time.
I alternate between “people are stupid” and “they are better off without me” (I truly believe the second one). Times of the day? Some days it’s constant low ebb hate. Other days it’s not there at all. The worst, I wake up filled with rage and literally hate everyone.
 
Dubay said:
I agree consult a Doctor for medication. Try listening to Joyce Meyer on enjoying everyday life. Maybe an exorcist is needed, if you are in mortal sin than not allowed to do confession till behavior stops. Maybe .
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As for the suggestion to medicate - no. We are so quick in this society to try to fix emotional/spiritual issues with a pill and then do no introspective or self improvement work. I’m not going to subject myself to a synthetic compound that comes with a mile long list of disclaimers and side effects.
 
23morgan said:
As for the suggestion to medicate - no. We are so quick in this society to try to fix emotional/spiritual issues with a pill and then do no introspective or self improvement work. I’m not going to subject myself to a synthetic compound that comes with a mile long list of disclaimers and side effects.
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Ok , no medication. How about Joyce Meyers or bible retreat ??
 
I am the fourth to tell you to go to Adoration and lay this hatred at the Altar of His Love. The evil one is telling you NOT to go to Confession. Confession is very, very powerful and the evil one knows this and is trying to convince you it will do no good…remember he is the father of lies. But, go to Adoration as well. My advise and prayers for you.

Love in Christ,
mlz
 
Dubay said:
Ok , no medication. How about Joyce Meyers or bible retreat ??
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I know you mean well, but Joyce Meyers is not Catholic, and is part of the “name it and claim it” preaching movement. Her teaching is flawed as far as theology - the OP would only confuse himself. I recommend watching EWTN or listening to Catholic radio.
 
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