Finding a catholic spouse young adult

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Also, a girl might ‘friendzone’ a guy purely because she assumes he’s not interested in her. In my experience, if a guy doesn’t show any sign of interest after a couple of interactions, I just ‘friendzone’ him because I assume that is where he wants to be.

Catholic girls – ones under 25 – can be pretty dumb at knowing that a guy is interested. More than a few of them have never been asked out at all before, and so they assume that men aren’t interested.
 
This isn’t just catholic girls. This is people under 25. I’m a day away from 27 and I’m still not great at asking people out. We aren’t taught how anymore. We ask to hang out or something. No one really goes, “Listen I would love to take you on a date.” It is not a thing in my generation, partly from hook up culture, partly because we do not want to get hurt, and three because we never want to do it in person either as well it is much easier to send a message, it makes getting rejected a lot easier. Oh and I as a guy have zero clue when a woman is interested. I need flashing neon signs!
 
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Yeah. I know. I’m only 10 months older than you are. Happy birthday by the way!
 
Actually I think that messages are fine as long as they’re not just ‘Hey’ lol
 
Well not dating sites I meant like a guy in school or college dms you Twitter or private messages you on Facebook. I feel it’s less personally and also can lead to more embarrassing things, if a girl goes full Mia Khalifa on you for trying.
 
I just looked up Mia Khalifa. It says she’s a Lebanese porn star. Whatever going ‘full Mia Khalifa’ means, it’s probably not good! 😂😂😂
 
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Just a thought for those of either sex looking for a like minded spouse.

Don’t be afraid to spend time with people of the opposite sex who share your beliefs, even if you are not attracted to them as ‘spouse material’.

A wider social network is often the way for God to arrange a ‘chance’ meeting with that special person !
 
Lots of guys hit her up and try to ask her out on Twitter and stuff, including celebrities and athletes, she shames them publicly
 
Wow. Well, if the girls you know do that, that’s really abnormal behaviour. Unless the guy has been a real jerk or really crude or something, which I’m sure you’re not.
 
I think that really means “don’t come off as desperate to find someone ‘to complete you’”. There is nothing more unattractive than desperation.
 
i think it is a lot of enjoying your life and not caring (even though we do). the times when ive been asked out a lot were when I didnt care about being in a relationship and was enjoying my life. people who enjoy their lives tend to be attractive to others. easier said than done, but sometimes you gotta fake it till you make it.
As a woman, im also attracted more to guys who arent desperate to find a spouse or date around a lot.
 
This is just my 2 cents, but take it for what it’s worth.

Attend high school and college reunions, if possible.

If your town has a community education program, sign up for a class or two.

Volunteer with a Church organization.

If you have a local seminary, take a course there or sign up for Bible study or such course at your parish or neighboring ones.

Go to the library for book talks. It doesn’t always have to be Catholic.

I hope these help.
 
Thanks for all the (name removed by moderator)ut guys! I didn’t realize how much different ideas we all have but it is all good! I pray for you all as well as myself that we can meet the one God has for us!
 
Well I am pretty much in the same boat as you are man, although you are way better at being involved in the Church than I am from the sounds of it. So maybe my advice isn’t the greatest. But I will just throw two things at you:
  1. It is really easy to just get absorbed in the daily routine of waking up, working out (maybe), going to work, going home, making dinner, going to bed, repeat. Then the weekend rolls around and all you want to do is chill because you are exhausted. Next thing you know a year or so has gone by and you haven’t even met new people. So make a conscious effort to go out with friends, even just for lunch or something. If you’ve got some hobbies outside church try and do them with likeminded people. For example my sister moved to a new town and joined a trail running group to get out of the house, out of her work bubble, and stay in shape. She made a couple new friends, they team up for races and drinks and things, and she is always telling me about some cute new guy who shows up (but is invariably dating or married lol). Not saying join something to look for dates and hit on every girl you meet but joining something will open opportunities and you could meet someone you hit it off with. Don’t sit and home and watch Netflix!
  2. I’ve been to a bunch of weddings for friends lately which is fun but also slightly depressing lol. One thing I’ve noticed is that a lot of people marry people they’ve either already known for a while (but not dated) or who moved in basically the same social circles and friend groups but never met for a while. For example my cousin met and married her friend’s sister in law’s brother (sounds convoluted I know). I was just at a wedding where my friend married a girl he had known for about 10yrs but they dated for way less than that. Several people I know from my college catholic student union all ended up intermarrying within that student union. Several of my friends’ wives have tried setting me up with various friends of theirs for some reason (I haven’t quite figured out if they are trying to set me up or set their friends up, who knows). Etc. Point being, most people seem to meet people through friends. Don’t automatically shun friends or friends of friends or relatives of friends as “off limits” or assume you are already in the friend zone. You don’t know until you ask.
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  1. I know I said two points but I’ve got a third. You said many if the girls you meet “friend zone” you pretty quickly. In my opinion you are only “friend zoned” if you ask a girl out and she explicitly says “I’m not interested in you that way, let’s just be friends”. If you are just assuming a girl isn’t willing to go on a date with you just because she isn’t sighing at your every word and fluttering her eyelashes at you, you could very well be writing off a potential girlfriend because you just assume she only wants to be friends. I am personally pretty dense, and several times I failed to ask a girl out because I assumed she wasn’t interested in me that way. Then later found out that she was interested but didn’t think I was interested because I never asked her and so she pretended that she wasn’t interested. If that makes any sense. Long story short, if you like a girl just ask her and get the nonsense over with one way or another. It is much less stressful.
Anyways that is just my advice, not that it’s worked for me so far, so take it for what it’s worth.
 
Bluesfan19 said:
Thanks for all the (name removed by moderator)ut guys! I didn’t realize how much different ideas we all have but it is all good! I pray for you all as well as myself that we can meet the one God has for us!
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It is not Catholic teaching that God has one and only one pre-planned spouse chosen for us from the beginning of time; such belief can lead to manipulation. In fact, Catholic Answers founder Karl Keating addressed this in one of his e-letters about 10 years ago. The original was removed from www,catholic.com, but there is a version here (please see the last paragraph):

 
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