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kozlosap
Guest
I’m praying for you to relax and have fun in college! First thing is that I don’t quite get how someone who admits they have never dated can be obsessing about marriage, especially at the age of 18. I taught high school kids who were on the Autism Spectrum for 33 years and quite obviously you are on the high high end of that measure. Please listen to what your counselor is telling you about trying to rid yourself of OCD tendencies. Find the Newmann Center nearest to your college and start attending their social activities. You don’t have to attend mass there if you don’t want to, but at least you will meet other Catholic kids. I would also consider transferring to a Catholic university.
Remember that the difference between a person’s income who received a high school diploma, and one with a BA or BS is huge. As the mother of a 29 year old, I can’t imagine there are many young girls who would marry someone at 18-22 who couldn’t support himself first which includes rent, car, insurance, etc.
Please slow down and put your right foot in front of your left and make some guy friends and girl aquantiances so that you learn the social cues needed in order to have a normal social life. Once again, I’m praying for you (not in Latin either!).
Remember that the difference between a person’s income who received a high school diploma, and one with a BA or BS is huge. As the mother of a 29 year old, I can’t imagine there are many young girls who would marry someone at 18-22 who couldn’t support himself first which includes rent, car, insurance, etc.
Please slow down and put your right foot in front of your left and make some guy friends and girl aquantiances so that you learn the social cues needed in order to have a normal social life. Once again, I’m praying for you (not in Latin either!).
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Phalanx
Guest
Am i the only one here who wouldn’t even THINK of having a child before 28+
You’re in collage mate, how about putting the “get married and settle down” agenda on hold for a while and explore life while you have the chance? When you get a child you’re going to be tied down with responsibilities and there’s no way out. Then you can say goodbye to living a spontanious year abroad or interrailing through europe.
This topic blows my mind. In my class of 30 students there’s only 3 of us that doesn’t have children. What has happened to the world, is everyones sole purpose to reproduce? What happened to being young and wild, making dumb misstakes and experiencing as much out of life as possible? There are other things than sitting in a home raising a family and saving for retirement… am i the only one seeing this??
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Latinitas
Guest
No need to close it, actually.
I thank all the responders sincerely. I will not be responding to any more posts, however, unless one is really thought provoking.
Benedicat Deus
Latinitas
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Xantippe
Guest
Latinitas,
I’m wondering about whether your taste for simplicity and austerity is quite compatible with a happy family life. I live with my husband and three kids, and if I had my druthers, our home would look like one of those sparsely decorated magazine pictures, but back in reality, my husband has all this hobby and electronic stuff that I can’t even identify, the baby has huge amounts of equipment, the older kids are always making new treasures, and I am generally the only person in the family who will willingly part with their possessions.
Think seriously about this. Do you really want a family (which means mess, confusion, chaos, and bickering), or do you want the perfect family in your head, that fits in perfectly with the life that you live as a single guy and disappears when you don’t want to deal with it anymore?
You keep saying that you would die for your wife, but dying’s easy when you’re 18 (that’s why the Marine Corps is so interested in your age category). It’s living that’s hard. Can you work all day and then come home and take your baby from your wife while she cooks dinner and then be with the baby all evening and deal with a couple night wake ups (maybe your wife will get the baby, but you’ll still wake up) and then go to work in the morning, work all day, and then come home and…You see where this is going. And that’s just the beginner course. In the advanced course, you add in a new kid every couple years. It’s like juggling where you keep adding more and more balls. A little bit too much of that too soon and people snap. There is the very sad case of the Torodes (the couple that wrote The Open Embrace and then recanted and split, very publicly). They were also very young. Maybe you wouldn’t snap, but maybe your wife would.
nytimes.com/2011/07/09/us/09beliefs.html?_r=0
The people who are telling you to slow down are by and large experienced people with families. Why do you think you have nothing to learn from people who have done what you hope to do?
I’m wondering about whether your taste for simplicity and austerity is quite compatible with a happy family life. I live with my husband and three kids, and if I had my druthers, our home would look like one of those sparsely decorated magazine pictures, but back in reality, my husband has all this hobby and electronic stuff that I can’t even identify, the baby has huge amounts of equipment, the older kids are always making new treasures, and I am generally the only person in the family who will willingly part with their possessions.
Think seriously about this. Do you really want a family (which means mess, confusion, chaos, and bickering), or do you want the perfect family in your head, that fits in perfectly with the life that you live as a single guy and disappears when you don’t want to deal with it anymore?
You keep saying that you would die for your wife, but dying’s easy when you’re 18 (that’s why the Marine Corps is so interested in your age category). It’s living that’s hard. Can you work all day and then come home and take your baby from your wife while she cooks dinner and then be with the baby all evening and deal with a couple night wake ups (maybe your wife will get the baby, but you’ll still wake up) and then go to work in the morning, work all day, and then come home and…You see where this is going. And that’s just the beginner course. In the advanced course, you add in a new kid every couple years. It’s like juggling where you keep adding more and more balls. A little bit too much of that too soon and people snap. There is the very sad case of the Torodes (the couple that wrote The Open Embrace and then recanted and split, very publicly). They were also very young. Maybe you wouldn’t snap, but maybe your wife would.
nytimes.com/2011/07/09/us/09beliefs.html?_r=0
The people who are telling you to slow down are by and large experienced people with families. Why do you think you have nothing to learn from people who have done what you hope to do?
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AuditVocemMeam
Guest
While I agree that it is important to be prudent in the decision to get married, I don’t understand why youth should be a time for “making mistakes” and being “wild”. Youth is a time for transitioning between dependent childhood and independent adulthood, where one is supposed to go from relying on his parents to being a strong citizen and pillar of society. It is a time to cultivate virtues. Why would one ever want to make any mistakes at all, let alone set aside an entire portion of life as “the time during which mistakes ought to be made”? The reason they’re called mistakes is because we shouldn’t have done them.What happened to being young and wild, making dumb misstakes and experiencing as much out of life as possible? There are other things than sitting in a home raising a family and saving for retirement… am i the only one seeing this??
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Ridgerunner
Guest
You left out the part where the baby’s diaper is full and you suspect your spouse let it go (not for a long time, but for just enough time) until you came home so you would have to change it instead of him/her. Easy to get suspicious about such things in a marriage.
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Xantippe
Guest
Very funny, Ridgerunner!
There’s a thread just starting, entitled “confessions of a horrible mother,” that I think Latinitas needs to read.
forums.catholic-questions.org/showthread.php?p=11357602#post11357602
There’s a thread just starting, entitled “confessions of a horrible mother,” that I think Latinitas needs to read.
forums.catholic-questions.org/showthread.php?p=11357602#post11357602
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Estevao
Guest
OP you seem pretty wise well beyond your years.
You see that most of the “play it safe” advice you’ve been getting here is worthless. These people have been infected with the anti-family ethos of this society, their advice is utterly worthless and will only lead you to being more lonely than you are now. Their mentality is the reason why the churches are emptying with no children to fill the pews or go to Catholic school. It’s the reason why our birthrate is abysmal. They put careers and material security ahead of marriage and family.
If you want something OP, go get it, don’t listen to these naysayers. Work on your social skills, get out of your head, ask women out, set up some dates, and look for a woman is interested in starting a family and is handy around the home.
Would you seriously want to marry a woman who would only consider you after you’ve gotten a job and a house and a car? Also you would want a woman who isn’t even considering marriage as she’s approaching her 20s, who’s more interested in watching “Glee”, going to the hottest concerts, socializing and partying but doesn’t know how to cook or clean? That shows an anti-family attitude and so what if many women are going to think you’re a “creeper” because you’re thinking about a family. These women are not quality wife material, ignore them.
All this advice about getting your career in line first is a joke. Sure work on that, but you don’t have to ignore dating like these people are suggesting that you do. My grandparents married young (by our standard now) and they raised their 3 kids in a trailer while the husband went around from town to town working as a tradesman. They had the best love I’ve ever seen. I’m sure many of us have similar stories of the strong love our grandparents had. I read stories often of Christian couples from a generation or two ago who married in college or just upon graduating, and faced the world together even when they had to live a spartan life at first…because they loved each other.
Now look at marriage. Everybody is following the advice in this thread, everybody is “playing it safe”, getting your education, 9-5 job, big mortgage and car payment plan set up. And then they might consider marrying at the age of 26-28. And half of them get divorced, and the birthrate is terrible, catholic schools shutting down and churches emptying.
Honestly OP don’t ignore looking for a protestant wife. Consider making this thread on an evangelical board for some sounder advice. The family culture inside those churches is much stronger than it is in the Catholic church. Those women are looking for a family, those women can take care of the home, those women want a good husband like you.
Do you seriously want to wait another 10 years before you marry? That’s a joke and if you don’t want it than don’t accept it.
You see that most of the “play it safe” advice you’ve been getting here is worthless. These people have been infected with the anti-family ethos of this society, their advice is utterly worthless and will only lead you to being more lonely than you are now. Their mentality is the reason why the churches are emptying with no children to fill the pews or go to Catholic school. It’s the reason why our birthrate is abysmal. They put careers and material security ahead of marriage and family.
If you want something OP, go get it, don’t listen to these naysayers. Work on your social skills, get out of your head, ask women out, set up some dates, and look for a woman is interested in starting a family and is handy around the home.
Would you seriously want to marry a woman who would only consider you after you’ve gotten a job and a house and a car? Also you would want a woman who isn’t even considering marriage as she’s approaching her 20s, who’s more interested in watching “Glee”, going to the hottest concerts, socializing and partying but doesn’t know how to cook or clean? That shows an anti-family attitude and so what if many women are going to think you’re a “creeper” because you’re thinking about a family. These women are not quality wife material, ignore them.
All this advice about getting your career in line first is a joke. Sure work on that, but you don’t have to ignore dating like these people are suggesting that you do. My grandparents married young (by our standard now) and they raised their 3 kids in a trailer while the husband went around from town to town working as a tradesman. They had the best love I’ve ever seen. I’m sure many of us have similar stories of the strong love our grandparents had. I read stories often of Christian couples from a generation or two ago who married in college or just upon graduating, and faced the world together even when they had to live a spartan life at first…because they loved each other.
Now look at marriage. Everybody is following the advice in this thread, everybody is “playing it safe”, getting your education, 9-5 job, big mortgage and car payment plan set up. And then they might consider marrying at the age of 26-28. And half of them get divorced, and the birthrate is terrible, catholic schools shutting down and churches emptying.
Honestly OP don’t ignore looking for a protestant wife. Consider making this thread on an evangelical board for some sounder advice. The family culture inside those churches is much stronger than it is in the Catholic church. Those women are looking for a family, those women can take care of the home, those women want a good husband like you.
Do you seriously want to wait another 10 years before you marry? That’s a joke and if you don’t want it than don’t accept it.
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Xantippe
Guest
Estevao said:
“Do you seriously want to wait another 10 years before you marry? That’s a joke and if you don’t want it than don’t accept it.”
Nobody is telling him to wait 10 years to marry (there was only one vote to wait 10 years before having kids), but 5 years would be an excellent idea.
I have never seen an 18-year-old boy that I would want to marry my daughter.
“Do you seriously want to wait another 10 years before you marry? That’s a joke and if you don’t want it than don’t accept it.”
Nobody is telling him to wait 10 years to marry (there was only one vote to wait 10 years before having kids), but 5 years would be an excellent idea.
I have never seen an 18-year-old boy that I would want to marry my daughter.
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Havard
Guest
Marriage is not a cure to loneliness, as many married people will attest.
I am single and twice your age, and have been been a fully practicing Catholic all the while. I haven’t met the right woman, and not for lack of effort on my part.
As they say, if you want to make God laugh, tell him your plans. Do your best and let God do the rest.
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Latinitas
Guest
I know I said that I would not get involved unless something was stimulating, but as I see that this forum is going to become a debate land, I still need to be involved, since it is about me.
Once again, while you can post, if it gets to the point where this becomes a debate where one of the persons is not me, I will intervene again; without that, farewell from this forum (although I will continue to read).
Benedicat Deus
Latinitas
I’ve done this for four years with my grandmother. So yes, I can.
This is true: Only God can truly cure loneliness, and I’m trying to make friends of male company as well. But my longing for a wife will only be satisfied by a wife.
You think I don’t know that. College is hard, and we all say I should stay…
Ah, but I fear God, and I will not break a vow. I never said that I would take it more seriously than other faithful Catholics.
I absolutely will not marry a Protestant wife. There is no greater way to bring dissension to marriage than marrying someone in a different religion. While I want to marry and have sex and have children, I’m not doing it to “spill my seed” or “open a gateway to sexual pleasure”, especially my children have Hell to avoid and Heaven to gain by choosing Catholicism over Protestantism. I do thank you for the complement, and am in agreement with you on most of your points, although what you see as “anti-family garabage”, I see as honest objections to reflect on. While I’m debating them here, I’m honestly considering what they say, as well.
Well, it’s going to be hard with that attitude. Also, if you see an 18-year old as a boy, than no, you aren’t going to meet them.
Once again, while you can post, if it gets to the point where this becomes a debate where one of the persons is not me, I will intervene again; without that, farewell from this forum (although I will continue to read).
Benedicat Deus
Latinitas
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Xantippe
Guest
Latinitas said:
“Ah, but I fear God, and I will not break a vow.”
But what about your wife? What if you marry, find yourself divorced at 22, cannot get an annulment, and then have to live the rest of your life alone? Are you up for that? I would argue that if you aren’t willing to make that commitment, you are not ready for marriage.
“Well, it’s going to be hard with that attitude. Also, if you see an 18-year old as a boy, than no, you aren’t going to meet them.”
I ran a household of five when I was 15 years old and my mom had cancer. I was not ready to marry then and I wasn’t ready to be married three years later, and girls generally develop much faster than boys. As it happened, I got married just shy of 23, having finished college, lived and worked two years abroad, and having almost finished my first year of graduate school. My husband was 25. We have a diagnosed Aspie daughter and my husband and I both have tendencies in that direction. I have a general idea what kind of critter you probably are.
The problem is, the more you say you’re ready, the more certain I am that you don’t know what you would be getting into. Marriage is all about interpersonal relations, and that’s your Achilles heel. If anything, your Aspie tendencies make it an even better idea to wait.
“Ah, but I fear God, and I will not break a vow.”
But what about your wife? What if you marry, find yourself divorced at 22, cannot get an annulment, and then have to live the rest of your life alone? Are you up for that? I would argue that if you aren’t willing to make that commitment, you are not ready for marriage.
“Well, it’s going to be hard with that attitude. Also, if you see an 18-year old as a boy, than no, you aren’t going to meet them.”
I ran a household of five when I was 15 years old and my mom had cancer. I was not ready to marry then and I wasn’t ready to be married three years later, and girls generally develop much faster than boys. As it happened, I got married just shy of 23, having finished college, lived and worked two years abroad, and having almost finished my first year of graduate school. My husband was 25. We have a diagnosed Aspie daughter and my husband and I both have tendencies in that direction. I have a general idea what kind of critter you probably are.
The problem is, the more you say you’re ready, the more certain I am that you don’t know what you would be getting into. Marriage is all about interpersonal relations, and that’s your Achilles heel. If anything, your Aspie tendencies make it an even better idea to wait.
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AuditVocemMeam
Guest
I think it’s just that - while I am sure you didn’t mean it this way - “18 year old boy” sounds dangerously close to a put-down, because that age is getting to the point where a man really should have grown up already.
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Xantippe
Guest
I can’t with a straight face say “18-year-old man.” Whenever I see that phrase in the newspaper, I always do a double-take.
I don’t think there’s a gender difference in this particular case. “18-year-old woman” also sounds strange to me.
I don’t think there’s a gender difference in this particular case. “18-year-old woman” also sounds strange to me.
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ccl239
Guest
OP, from reading what you have written so far, you remind me so much of my husband who is an aspie! I hope I can offer you some helpful ideas. Regardless, know I will keep you in my prayers.
As far as being border-aspie, despite what many people say it is possible to have a wonderful marriage with someone who is. I wouldn’t change a thing about my husband! I would have found it helpful if my husband would have explained to me that he was an aspie early on in our relationship. A lot of misunderstandings could have been avoided. Also, we have found that he has made a lot of progress socially/with social cues the longer we have been together as we both “get” each other in a way that no one else does. This seems to make it much easier to explain social cues.
I firmly believe that what age you are ready for marriage should be between you, your future wife, and God. No one else. I say this as someone who was very serious about marriage at 18. I met my husband at 19 and we both just knew that this was the person God had chosen for us within several weeks of dating. I know this isn’t most people’s experience but it was ours. We listened to what everyone else said instead of really praying about it and didn’t marry until we were almost 24. While we do have a very successful, happy, and stable marriage, I firmly believe this is in spite of us waiting so long to get married. I am not saying you would do that; it sounds like you have a much better head on your shoulders than I did at 18.
God Bless
P.s. have you prayed the miracle rosary novena? Maybe ask your spiritual director if it would be good for you? Just a thought.
As far as being border-aspie, despite what many people say it is possible to have a wonderful marriage with someone who is. I wouldn’t change a thing about my husband! I would have found it helpful if my husband would have explained to me that he was an aspie early on in our relationship. A lot of misunderstandings could have been avoided. Also, we have found that he has made a lot of progress socially/with social cues the longer we have been together as we both “get” each other in a way that no one else does. This seems to make it much easier to explain social cues.
I firmly believe that what age you are ready for marriage should be between you, your future wife, and God. No one else. I say this as someone who was very serious about marriage at 18. I met my husband at 19 and we both just knew that this was the person God had chosen for us within several weeks of dating. I know this isn’t most people’s experience but it was ours. We listened to what everyone else said instead of really praying about it and didn’t marry until we were almost 24. While we do have a very successful, happy, and stable marriage, I firmly believe this is in spite of us waiting so long to get married. I am not saying you would do that; it sounds like you have a much better head on your shoulders than I did at 18.
God Bless
P.s. have you prayed the miracle rosary novena? Maybe ask your spiritual director if it would be good for you? Just a thought.
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severus68
Guest
Firstly, you have no right to tell anyone not to post.
Secondly, if you start a thread in a public forum asking for advice, prayers, you will get advice but not necessarily what you want to hear.
Thirdly, those who respond to you are older and wiser with their experience, don’t just brush away their advice.
With charity, I would advise not to speak about your high intelligence, etc when socialising, trying to make friends, meeting women to find your future wife. I would give that same advice to a child of mine.
I wish you the best in life. May God guide you and bless you.
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Phalanx
Guest
Oh man, I don’t know whether you live alone in the forest, are part of a cult or just trolling the forums…
It seems that you are pretty confused about modern society in either way.
We grow from our misstakes and missfortunes. Thats when we develop our independance and personallity traits. People make misstakes all the time, without failure there is no sucess. When the world is totally new to you (As you are newly independant and young) you learn the most valueble life lessons, and the misstakes will not take as much of a toll on your later life.
I’ll give you a personal example. Moving to another country without any money. I borrowed 3 000 $ and just left. With no intention to return. It worked out for a couple of months but ultimately I had to move back home. The whole trip had alot of ups and down, and in retrospect… It was a misstake. But since Im young and with minimal responsibilities It did not negatively affect any aspect of my life except the economical (the money owed to friends). But during the travels i learned ALOT from life. It strengthened my faith and made me more hardened and used to reality. How could a married family man pack up and leave the country with no money? And that is just one of the hundreds of things that IMHO could and should only be experienced by the young and the bold BEFORE getting into serious marriage.
I know my take on this makes the older generations go into a scolding rampage. But these are new exciting times. We should do our best to adapt our lifestyle to our religion but do not prematurely “end” your amazing freedom and youth by tieing yourself down.
Edit: Corrected some grammar… I have alot more to say on this matter but I am enough off topic as is. But some stones are better left unturned in this forum, and frankly I dont want to get banned
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Xantippe
Guest
Phalanx said:
“We grow from our misstakes and missfortunes. Thats when we develop our independance and personallity traits. People make misstakes all the time, without failure there is no sucess. When the world is totally new to you (As you are newly independant and young) you learn the most valueble life lessons, and the misstakes will not take as much of a toll on your later life.”
Exactly. “Mistake” doesn’t need to be a euphemism for sin, it could just be a mistake, the result of inexperience. It’s better to make those mistakes when the only person who suffers will be you, not you, your wife, and your kids.
“I’ll give you a personal example. Moving to another country without any money. I borrowed 3 000 $ and just left. With no intention to return. It worked out for a couple of months but ultimately I had to move back home. The whole trip had alot of ups and down, and in retrospect… It was a misstake. But since Im young and with minimal responsibilities It did not negatively affect any aspect of my life except the economical (the money owed to friends). But during the travels i learned ALOT from life. It strengthened my faith and made me more hardened and used to reality. How could a married family man pack up and leave the country with no money? And that is just one of the hundreds of things that IMHO could and should only be experienced by the young and the bold BEFORE getting into serious marriage.”
Exactly. As it says in Ecclesiastes, “to every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven.”
I worked abroad when I was in my very early 20s, and I’m glad I did. Before you have a family, you can travel further, take more risks, read a book from end to end in a single sitting, cultivate friendships, work without thinking much about money, and give of yourself in ways that are not possible (or moral) for a married person. A married person does not belong to themselves in the same way that a single person does. If my husband, as a single person, felt called to make a large cash gift to a friend in need or to spend a day helping a friend move or doing some major volunteer project or was interested in taking up an expensive hobby, he could do that without asking anybody or considering anybody but himself. But if he did that as a married man, he would be acting very wrongly toward me and toward our children.
I should also mention that as C.S. Lewis mentions, one of the great temptations of married life is avarice. As my husband and I quote to each other when he is just about to take on some sort of work project that he wouldn’t take on if we didn’t have a growing family, “A married man will do anything for money.” The problem here is that while on the one hand it is the duty of parents to provide for their children and defend them, it is possible to go too far, to become obsessed with providing for their future, and to act in ways that are not just toward other members of the community. It is very easy for family life to offer temptations toward selfishness and injustice toward outsiders.
Once the OP is out of college and is working and supporting himself, he has the opportunity as a single layman to 1) serve others through his work 2) to contribute to charitable efforts through donations and service, to an extent which would be very difficult to a married man with a family. I think that this is a very important opportunity and time of life for a young adult. (My work abroad was two years in the Peace Corps.) That’s what I see St. Paul saying when he says, “An unmarried man is concerned about the Lord’s affairs—how he can please the Lord. But a married man is concerned about the affairs of this world—how he can please his wife—and his interests are divided.” Obviously, St. Paul does not envision the unmarried man or woman watching Glee and partying.
“We grow from our misstakes and missfortunes. Thats when we develop our independance and personallity traits. People make misstakes all the time, without failure there is no sucess. When the world is totally new to you (As you are newly independant and young) you learn the most valueble life lessons, and the misstakes will not take as much of a toll on your later life.”
Exactly. “Mistake” doesn’t need to be a euphemism for sin, it could just be a mistake, the result of inexperience. It’s better to make those mistakes when the only person who suffers will be you, not you, your wife, and your kids.
“I’ll give you a personal example. Moving to another country without any money. I borrowed 3 000 $ and just left. With no intention to return. It worked out for a couple of months but ultimately I had to move back home. The whole trip had alot of ups and down, and in retrospect… It was a misstake. But since Im young and with minimal responsibilities It did not negatively affect any aspect of my life except the economical (the money owed to friends). But during the travels i learned ALOT from life. It strengthened my faith and made me more hardened and used to reality. How could a married family man pack up and leave the country with no money? And that is just one of the hundreds of things that IMHO could and should only be experienced by the young and the bold BEFORE getting into serious marriage.”
Exactly. As it says in Ecclesiastes, “to every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven.”
I worked abroad when I was in my very early 20s, and I’m glad I did. Before you have a family, you can travel further, take more risks, read a book from end to end in a single sitting, cultivate friendships, work without thinking much about money, and give of yourself in ways that are not possible (or moral) for a married person. A married person does not belong to themselves in the same way that a single person does. If my husband, as a single person, felt called to make a large cash gift to a friend in need or to spend a day helping a friend move or doing some major volunteer project or was interested in taking up an expensive hobby, he could do that without asking anybody or considering anybody but himself. But if he did that as a married man, he would be acting very wrongly toward me and toward our children.
I should also mention that as C.S. Lewis mentions, one of the great temptations of married life is avarice. As my husband and I quote to each other when he is just about to take on some sort of work project that he wouldn’t take on if we didn’t have a growing family, “A married man will do anything for money.” The problem here is that while on the one hand it is the duty of parents to provide for their children and defend them, it is possible to go too far, to become obsessed with providing for their future, and to act in ways that are not just toward other members of the community. It is very easy for family life to offer temptations toward selfishness and injustice toward outsiders.
Once the OP is out of college and is working and supporting himself, he has the opportunity as a single layman to 1) serve others through his work 2) to contribute to charitable efforts through donations and service, to an extent which would be very difficult to a married man with a family. I think that this is a very important opportunity and time of life for a young adult. (My work abroad was two years in the Peace Corps.) That’s what I see St. Paul saying when he says, “An unmarried man is concerned about the Lord’s affairs—how he can please the Lord. But a married man is concerned about the affairs of this world—how he can please his wife—and his interests are divided.” Obviously, St. Paul does not envision the unmarried man or woman watching Glee and partying.
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Havard
Guest
I’d wager that wouldn’t have been the case throughout most of history. Society infantilizes people in their teens and twenties now, as the notions and norms of youth keep getting extended for all generations.
The OP doesn’t sound like your average beer-guzzling, XBOX and Family Guy-addicted (or whatever’s popular now) man-child. Hurray for that, and may his tribe increase.
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