First date ideas

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buckr02

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Hey all,

So I finally decided that I am going to give a hand at dating and there is a girl I met about two months ago that I am interested in asking on a date. I have no problem doing this and think I won’t be scared or nervous, but the problem is that I don’t know what to do on the date if she says yes and I think I should figure this out before I ask her.

I could always go for dinner or something similar, but I like not doing the standard stuff, so I want a more original idea. I had thought about asking if she’d like to go to a Phillies game, but there’s always the chance that she hates baseball or just doesn’t care for it. I only started thinking about this last night, so I don’t really have any other ideas at the moment.

Any suggestions?
 
For me it would depend on how well you know each other. Dinner is always a nice idea; however, I like the idea of the baseball game – of course, I like sports. Could always meet for coffee at a Starbucks or something like that.

Good luck. I’m sure you’ll get lots of great ideas from the forum.
 
Nanny_PK said:
For me it would depend on how well you know each other.
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That’s the only thing that makes me second-guess my decision to ask her out. We don’t really know each other well at all, we’ve only talked a few times. But I figured that even if I don’t ask her on a date, it would be useful to get some ideas for the future.
 
Dinner is the best…because it gives you a chance to talk and find out what you have in common. The next date, you might be better able to discern another choice,… like a ball game or concert or movie, or boat ride, or a museum visit etc. or a bike ride etc.
 
I would go to dinner then find somewhere with a live band. Or maybe go for a nice long walk afterwords. Visit a gallery or sample some wine and cheese at a local winery. Do some research on the internet for local ideas. 👍
 
Ok so the general consensus is to just go for dinner… how formal should it be? I mean, not an expensive 5 star place, but would something like outback steakhouse work?

Oh, a friend of mine just suggested the zoo - any thoughts on that? It would be fun and give us a chance to talk and we could just walk around and have distractions if the talk dies, but I don’t know about it.
 
My DH took me off-roading for our first date. Even his parents, the bring-guns-to-everything, best-vacation-is-primitive-camping, we-ride-motorcycles-wearing-Army-boots types were like, “You’re taking her OFF-ROADING? For a FIRST date?!”

My mother did not help the situation when she found out that he drove a Suzuki Samurai. She filled my head with horror stories about how they tip over at the slightest provocation. I spent most of that date in white-knuckle silence, convinced I was going to be pulled out of a bloody wreck after we rolled down a canyon!

But you know… I look back on that with great fondness. He tried for weeks to get me to go out with him (I still wonder about that… I wasn’t exactly beating the guys off. I didn’t think he was that good-looking, to be honest!) Then he takes this huge risk of making the first date an activity I was not familiar with, likely to dislike, and that no other guy would have used for a first date. But I have come to realize over the years that he really wanted to show me who he was. And I think he realized the uniqueness of it… a risk but also a way to make sure I would never forget him. He took me deep into a really pretty canyon, and we walked along a stream to a secluded waterfall. We had a picnic snack in the cool spray and filtered sunshine coming through the leaves above us. Really very romantic, in the end calculation. 😃

He captured my imagination. We spent the next four years getting to know each other and falling madly in love. We’ve been married now for a little over 11 years and have five kids! And we still enjoy each other and have fun.

So don’t be afraid to do something unique, or that no other guy would do. It might pay off. Take the risk of really showing yourself to her. 😉
 
If you don’t feel comfortable with dinner…ask her for lunch. Then maybe a stroll around a park or something? (if things are going well)🙂

Good luck to you buck.
 
buckr02 said:
Ok so the general consensus is to just go for dinner… how formal should it be? I mean, not an expensive 5 star place, but would something like outback steakhouse work?
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Have several choices prepared. Ask her to the Outback and see what she says. If she is a vegetarian or something then ask her what her favorite restaurant is…

I agree that asking a girl out to dinner is a safe bet for your first date. If it goes well there will be plenty of opportunities to take her on special and creative dates:thumbsup:**

Oh, a friend of mine just suggested the zoo - any thoughts on that? It would be fun and give us a chance to talk and we could just walk around and have distractions if the talk dies, but I don’t know about it.

Good idea but save it…
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So, you don’t know her very well yet, but you know enough to have decided that she is worth an investment of your time and money in the form of a date. That is great! Don’t worry about what you don’t know about her yet, that is what dating is for!

You are worried about doing something she will not like. I encourage you not to worry about this either as you will learn more about a person on a date gone wrong than you will ever learn on a date gone right. (I married my husband because he was so easy to get along even though one of our excursions was an absolute, incredible NIGHTMARE). I say choose an activity that you will enjoy sharing with her. If you pick something that you are not interested in, you guarantee a boredom factor. However, you are a Phillies fan or just like Sports in general, then sharing that with her will not only give you a source of conversation, but will allow her to learn more about you and see you enthusiastic about something. Be cautious though, because if you are an OBSESSIVE phillies fan, this can backfire in a hurry.

I went on dates with men intent on being impressive, and they were, but it was the guys who were genuine and didn’t try to be something they weren’t that really won me over. One guy took me to a music store and we just sampled all of the new music that was available on the in-store listening systems. It was a great way to do an activity, share something he was passionate about (music) and talk about a subject on which everyone has an opinion!

Best wishes. You’ll have a great time if you are just yourself!
 
Opt for the dinner idea and nix the Phillies until you have a handle on her tolerance for the sport.
Find some common ground first.
 
odd woman out here:

dinner can be a big stressor-- where to go? what to wear? what to order? how to eat it? possibly too much romance-- candles, starlight etc.

pack a picnic lunch. go to an outdoor concert, something at a city park where you can stroll around.
or a picnic lunch and geoaching (my absolute new addiction) or a picnic lunch and a museum. something where you can sit a little, walk around a little, where there’s a low-personal investment attraction or event that will spark conversation. but something that you personally won’t feel too foreign doing.

casual clothes. and lots of chatting.

ask the local deli to fix the food for you and you’re magic. gals like guys who can picnic well.

btw, how old are you?
 
Just asking her to coffee might be a nice way to talk and get to know her better without putting too much pressure on the situation.
 
duskyjewel said:
My DH took me off-roading for our first date. Even his parents, the bring-guns-to-everything, best-vacation-is-primitive-camping, we-ride-motorcycles-wearing-Army-boots types were like, “You’re taking her OFF-ROADING? For a FIRST date?!”
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Way back when I remember my first date started with us going on a trip to Menard’s. How romantic! :love:
 
Do not under any circumstances take her to dinner for a first date. People will just stare and laugh at you - first dates are so easy to pick. 😉

But seriously. When I dated i found it way too much pressure to sit across from one another an keep the conversation going over dinner for a first date…

At the movies you have a quick chat and catch up before the movie, go in, watch it…then have something easy to talk about afterwards. Perfect for a first date.

I guess going to the pub is out of the question since you are only 20 and in the US. That is always a winner in the UK/Europe and AUS.
 
thomfra said:
Do not under any circumstances take her to dinner for a first date. People will just stare and laugh at you - first dates are so easy to pick. 😉

But seriously. When I dated i found it way too much pressure to sit across from one another an keep the conversation going over dinner for a first date…
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That’s exactly what I was thinking and was part of the reason I wanted to get other ideas.
 
The best dates I’ve ever had were when someone put in extra effort to do an activity that I really like. For example, once a guy took me hiking to the top of a beautiful mountain and then surprised me with a picnic lunch at the top (he included grilled portabella mushroom sandwiches which I had just by chance mentioned that I had been craving lately). Another time a guy took me to a movie that I really had been wanting to see. My DH took me antiquing recently. I guess the more you know the person the easier it gets to come up with good date ideas. Maybe you could meet for coffee or dinner and talk a little and then get ideas from there on what to do next.
 
I grew up just outside of Philly… How about a dinner theater on the wharf? Or if you drive… how about a trip to a local historic point… just not the Bourse (sp) that place gives the wrong signals… museum of art? Independence hall?

In my area there was alot of parks and Valley Forge… great first date places. I guess canoing is out of the question??
 
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