First time confession

[brad90956]

I can’t wait but nervous at the same time

I know the feeling. No matter how many times I go to confession I always get a little nervous. But there is something so special about humbling yourself before God, opening your heart and talking to Him and telling Him you are sorry for the things you have done and failed to do. And the best part…He ALWAYS forgives you and He ALWAYS loves you.

There is no other feeling in the world when you walk out of confession with a clean soul and new start.

 

[Casilda]

It’s actually really is a very very special moment of grace and of encounter with the Lord. Be at peace.

The only truly helpful answer, was this one quoted above.

It was suggested you start writing things you remember down, take those notes with you, it will help you focus. It helped me in my 45 year confession. Don’t worry about the priest, consider him Christ Himself you are confessing to. Search your heart, how have you hurt Christ? Then tell Him.

I wish you well.

 

[JRS_88]

The only truly helpful answer, was this one quoted above.

It was suggested you start writing things you remember down, take those notes with you, it will help you focus. It helped me in my 45 year confession. Don’t worry about the priest, consider him Christ Himself you are confessing to. Search your heart, how have you hurt Christ? Then tell Him.

I wish you well.

I take offense to these comments seeing as I’m one of the ones who suggested to make a thorough examination of conscience and write down sins, take your list etc. That highlighted portion above is personally offensive because that’s exactly what I did in my first confession back to the Church, just the time frame was different.

It worked for me and was suggested here before I even went to the priest.
Some of us need to do these things, and some of us thought it might be helpful.
If a person, going after many years, or in a first confession as an adult, has a lot to talk about, why not write something down in order to be thorough, and ask questions?

I really don’t know what else to say other than in the future, maybe try not to belittle
how someone returned to the the mystery of reconciliation.

 

[Casilda]

I take offense to these comments seeing as I’m one of the ones who suggested to make a thorough examination of conscience and write down sins, take your list etc. That highlighted portion above is personally offensive because that’s exactly what I did in my first confession back to the Church, just the time frame was different.

It worked for me and was suggested here before I even went to the priest.
Some of us need to do these things, and some of us thought it might be helpful.
If a person, going after many years, or in a first confession as an adult, has a lot to talk about, why not write something down in order to be thorough, and ask questions?

I really don’t know what else to say other than in the future, maybe try not to belittle
how someone returned to the the mystery of reconciliation.

I was referring to your suggestion. You have misunderstood what I wrote or I didn’t state it properly. (I did start that part out in a different paragraph.) Writing down what I remembered in examine is what I did and it helped me stay focused.

I did not belittle. It is one of, if not the main impediment to coming back to the faith and the most healing, confession/reconciliation.

I will try to word thoughts more carefully and give full credit.

 

[jimsnew]

Hello I’m currently in rcia at my parish and had a question about confession. I’m converting from Presbyterian and was baptized as an infant, I know I’m supposed to confess all sins from baptism until now but at 31 that’s a lot I’d laugh if I wast so ashamed at all the times I’ve let God down. So my question is: how far back do I go? Or just maybe make a bullet point version?
When in rcia do we go to confession? Is it right before Easter vigil?
I’m sure all this will be covered but I don’t want it sprung on me a few days before, I’d like some time to think it over.

Also i was told not to be too detailed in specifics with the priest but also be thorough. I don’t know how I can do both
Thanks

Don’t feel bad. Mine will be 48 years

 

[DAML72]

I didn’t mean if I remember it later. I meant what if I remember an event and don’t think of it as a mortal sin but in fact it was and I never confess it because I didn’t think I had too. To cover my bases should I confess all venial sins too? Or for 30 years of mortal + venial is need a full day confession reservation?

I was 40 at my first confession. Didn’t have an appointment, and I don’t think it lasted more than 10 or 15 minutes (though I wasn’t keeping track). I had a lot to confess also - a couple memo pages worth. You have a lot of time to prepare, examine, and condense. Focus on the big stuff, and talk in themes. As you go along in RCIA, you will also get advice with regard to confessing, and that will help you understand better what needs to be said.

My advice with regard to anything that’s a possible mortal sin - confess it anyway. It may not be a mortal sin for you because you didn’t know, but in looking back, you’ll feel much better knowing you confessed it and the slate is clean.

 

[Boy_Wonder]

Also i was told not to be too detailed in specifics with the priest but also be thorough. I don’t know how I can do both
Thanks

First off, welcome to the Catholic Church! May you be received with open arms. We’re grateful your journey has brought you here.

As for the quote above, list your sins first by category rather than by specific acts. Then, if particular things merit more attention, discuss them after you’ve completed the general confession by topics. As long as your intent is to confess all of your sins accurately and without making excuses or leaving anything out, you’ll be fine. Deliberate omissions and justifying distortions are the worst possible thing any penitent can do in confession.

Confess your sins accurately and as completely as possible. You’re speaking directly to Christ through his priest. Don’t worry what the priest thinks - he’s heard everything a thousand times before. The priest is also trained to compartmentalize so that things heard in confession stay there and don’t taint how he treats you outside the confessional.

Before your first confession, please try to learn the basic rubric of confession: the sequence of events, what to say, etc. Memorize the Act of Contrition before making your first confession. Prepare by reading some good examinations of conscience and other writings designed to help you make a good confession. There are plenty of these online. Pray for the grace to make a good confession.

Finally, make a habit of frequent confession. Try to go at least once a month - if not more often. This Sacrament is a source of great grace and sound advice.

 

[Faith1960]

One way you can approach this would be by following the Ten Commandments. There are good/great examinations of conscience available which correlate many, if not all, sins to one of the Ten. So you only need to confess about ten things. You also need to figure out how many times you committed the sins. You can estimate, and giving a frequency helps. “I violated the fourth commandment twice a day for four years.” This framework will satisfy the legal requirement to confess mortal sins in “kind and number” and will make any priest happy.

I’ve never said how many times I committed various sins with the exception of sometimes saying “several times.”
Mostly I’ve just listed my sins without saying the number of times and no priest ha ever questioned me about it.

 

[Elizium23]

I’ve never said how many times I committed various sins with the exception of sometimes saying “several times.”
Mostly I’ve just listed my sins without saying the number of times and no priest ha ever questioned me about it.

Canon Law requires us to confess mortal sins in “kind and number”. Many priests are very lax about the “number” part, but it’s still in there, so in building up good confession habits we should always be in the habit of numbering our mortal sins.

 

[DAML72]

Canon Law requires us to confess mortal sins in “kind and number”. Many priests are very lax about the “number” part, but it’s still in there, so in building up good confession habits we should always be in the habit of numbering our mortal sins.

If we can, of course. I have ADHD - numbering sins and actually getting it accurate would be an impossibility.

But the original question related to a first confession at age of 30 - it’s not practical to advise someone in this position to confess all mortal sins in kind and number. It is fine to approximate or indicate whether the behavior is habitual, etc.