First time mom needing help

[Rosauraduran89]

Hello, thank you for the help in advance. My Son just turned 3 a couple of months ago. A couple of weeks ago as he watched a movie, I noticed him touching himself. I asked what he was doing and noticed he had stuck a sock in his underpants and was pleasuring himself. I found it odd, (my husband and I don’t let him watch adult things obviously) but I didn’t know how to react, so My first instinct was to get mad at him and tell him he couldn’t do that. I’ve been reading, that I guess it’s the natural development of the body. And that it’s normal for kids to explore and that kids don’t do it as a sexual thing but more like a “feel good” thing. But today he did it again, this time I didn’t get mad at him I just told him not to do it. As I’ve read more about the topic, according to some articles I’ve found. They say we shouldn’t tell our children to not touch themselves, because it can hinder the child’s sexual development but instead teach them to do it in private. I know masturbation is not ok, but what should I do? Please help, I am so confused. I don’t want to hurt his sexual development, but at the same time I don’t want him to think it’s ok to masturbate.

 

[Elf01]

I’d speak to your husband about it. He would probably be the best person to handle it.

 

[QwertyGirl]

Discuss it with your pediatrician. It s a perfectly normal part of child development. I would suggest you just redirect him if you find him doing it in front of other people, perhaps with a remark that “That is private”. You don’t need to encourage him to do it in private. He is going to, anyway. But again, that is normal for children.

 

[Sugabee43]

As a mom of 3 boys, this is completely normal. Don’t make a big deal out of it or he’ll probably think it IS a big deal.
Best story ever on my oldest: When he was about 4, I was cleaning the house with that old MTV “Divas” concert series on. Happened to be the one with Aretha Franklin and Shania Twain. Son was playing while I cleaned, completely ignoring Aretha (how dare he??!). The second Shania stepped onstage and started singing, he stopped dead in his tracks and just stared; open-mouthed. When the program broke to commercial, he turned to me and said, “Momma, she pretty!”. I visibly gulped. My response was, “Yes, honey; God made her very pretty.” He then continued playing. About 5 minutes later, he came to me and said, “Momma, it won’t go down!” As someone who didn’t have brothers, this was a complete shock and nightmare!!! I think I mumbled something along the lines of, “Well, just leave it alone and it’ll go away by itself”.

So…get ready for some crazy moments!!

 

[TheLittleLady]

You teach your child that there are things we do not do in front of other people. For a three year old, you simply distract him with a toy or a “hey, look at that birdie” move his hand and say “the penis is not a toy” and move on.

 

[hoping4more]

make him wash his hands everytime he does it. It will help he associate washing hands after he goes to the restroom too. Otherwise just laugh it off and tell him to stop.