I
invisiblewitnes
Guest
Hi,
I have just recently moved out of living with an addicted parent and did not realize that this person was addicted, and how much it affected me. About a month ago I talked to a priest who asked me if there was addiction in the family and I realized there is. He emphasized codependency, a word which I had never heard before. I have been reading on the subject after a bunch of times where I would take out a book from the library and return it without reading it. But it has become clear that this describes a lot of the issues I am having. I have been recommended to look for Al-Anon meetings and other support, so I wanted to ask for prayers that I am guided by God in where He wants me to go in order to heal and be able to take care of myself. I don’t want to go into details but I will just say that my trust has been broken by this addicted parents lies and manipulation, which I did not understand until I realized the addiction problem. I did not understand what addiction was and how it affects a person. Also, pray for me that I heal from issues of wanting control. My problem is not so much that I try to control people or events, but the fact that the only behavior I saw growing up was controlling and manipulative so whenever I try to do something or interact or make friends with people the only forms of behavior I saw were contolling and manipulative. So usually rather than pursue a course with only those forms of behavior at my disposal I usually isolate myself and avoid things where I have to interact with people in order to avoid doing that to anyone. It is like I withdraw from people, rather than be in a situation where I know I am going to want to try to control the outcome because I know nothing different to do. It is very difficult for me to initiate relationships. I literally have broken off excellent friendships because once I started feeling the tendency to want to start controlling the outcome of things I decided, it is not good for me to be friends with this person because I don’t want to end up being possessive and constricting for them. I recently ruined relationships with the two best friends I ever had because I did not think it was healthy for them to be friends with me anymore because of this mentality in me. Please pray for me in this. Please pray for me to engage in healthy friendships with people who understand and can help me change this sort of codependent behavior.
God bless you.
I have just recently moved out of living with an addicted parent and did not realize that this person was addicted, and how much it affected me. About a month ago I talked to a priest who asked me if there was addiction in the family and I realized there is. He emphasized codependency, a word which I had never heard before. I have been reading on the subject after a bunch of times where I would take out a book from the library and return it without reading it. But it has become clear that this describes a lot of the issues I am having. I have been recommended to look for Al-Anon meetings and other support, so I wanted to ask for prayers that I am guided by God in where He wants me to go in order to heal and be able to take care of myself. I don’t want to go into details but I will just say that my trust has been broken by this addicted parents lies and manipulation, which I did not understand until I realized the addiction problem. I did not understand what addiction was and how it affects a person. Also, pray for me that I heal from issues of wanting control. My problem is not so much that I try to control people or events, but the fact that the only behavior I saw growing up was controlling and manipulative so whenever I try to do something or interact or make friends with people the only forms of behavior I saw were contolling and manipulative. So usually rather than pursue a course with only those forms of behavior at my disposal I usually isolate myself and avoid things where I have to interact with people in order to avoid doing that to anyone. It is like I withdraw from people, rather than be in a situation where I know I am going to want to try to control the outcome because I know nothing different to do. It is very difficult for me to initiate relationships. I literally have broken off excellent friendships because once I started feeling the tendency to want to start controlling the outcome of things I decided, it is not good for me to be friends with this person because I don’t want to end up being possessive and constricting for them. I recently ruined relationships with the two best friends I ever had because I did not think it was healthy for them to be friends with me anymore because of this mentality in me. Please pray for me in this. Please pray for me to engage in healthy friendships with people who understand and can help me change this sort of codependent behavior.
God bless you.