Forced Baptism Problem - Help!

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dancer7777

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Hello All. I have been learning and growing with the Roman Catholic Church for nearly 4-7 years since high school. I am having a problem and would like your help or advice. My family are Protestant/Pentecostal (Prosperity Gospel), and they are forcing me against by free will to get baptise in their church and in their religion. So, there is no way getting out of it. I made a promise several years ago that I will one day go through the Rite of Christian Initation for Adults (RCIA) and and join the Catholic Church family. I have received wisdom from the Catholic teachings, EWTN/Mother Angelica that spoke to several life situations I was facing, especially accepting and embracing having a learning disability. Mother Angelica’s Live had a program regarding disability that spoke to me. Unfortunately, my parents doesn’t support my decision to become Catholic. They won’t let me attend Mass nor any Catholic event or watch/read anything Catholic. They do not even acknowledge my disability saying “it is from the devil and is a part of witchcraft and occultism, and is a curse”. They also say this to my brother who has autism. They just want us to be permanently healed of disability. I watch the National Shrine TV Mass every Sunday morning in another room before going to the parents’ church. I also read Catholic literature on my own time. I am not comfortable being baptise in a different faith because I made a promise to myself to join the Catholic Church. The timing isn’t right (parents are forcing me to be baptise within the second week of March 2017). What should I do? I am 25 years of age and a female. My parents do not give free will to do anything or me to make own decisions. They force me every morning to attend their church which is titled “Winner’s Chapel International” which an all-African church and I never felt I truly belonged there. I always felt during my time in high school, catholic, and being a part of the college’s catholic club that I belong with the Catholic Church.
 
Don’t do it. Your parentx cannot force you to do it, even if they can make life unpleasant for you if you dissent.
 
If you are 25 years old, they cannot force you to be baptized in their religion even if you live with them.

This may be the time in your life that you will need to place your trust in God alone, stand your ground and do what you know in your heart to be right. I don’t know what your disability is (and you need not disclose it) but there is help out there for you to live on your own and live your life as you choose, including becoming Catholic.

Pray about it. Ask God to help you and give you courage. Then decide what you want to do, and take steps to achieve your goal.

May God bless you, I will keep you in my prayers.
 
Thank you. This matter had me feel sad because I had certain plans I wanted to do: find a job in field, drive, relocate to another state, and eventually become Catholic. I really feel uncomfortable by this forced baptism as I feel like I am breaking a promise to myself and I do not enjoy my experiences with Pentecostal/Protestant/Prosperty Gospel and my parents’ church.
Irishmom2 said:
If you are 25 years old, they cannot force you to be baptized in their religion even if you live with them.

This may be the time in your life that you will need to place your trust in God alone, stand your ground and do what you know in your heart to be right. I don’t know what your disability is (and you need not disclose it) but there is help out there for you to live on your own and live your life as you choose, including becoming Catholic.

Pray about it. Ask God to help you and give you courage. Then decide what you want to do, and take steps to achieve your goal.

May God bless you, I will keep you in my prayers.
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You are an adult. Make your own decision about your choice of religion. Stand up to the plate about your beliefs.
 
How can do this? What if they don’t listen to me and still force a baptism on me even when I refused?
Irishmom2 said:
If you are 25 years old, they cannot force you to be baptized in their religion even if you live with them.

This may be the time in your life that you will need to place your trust in God alone, stand your ground and do what you know in your heart to be right. I don’t know what your disability is (and you need not disclose it) but there is help out there for you to live on your own and live your life as you choose, including becoming Catholic.

Pray about it. Ask God to help you and give you courage. Then decide what you want to do, and take steps to achieve your goal.

May God bless you, I will keep you in my prayers.
Click to expand...
 
You can start by telling them no, you do not want to become Pentecostal. Tell them you respect them, but you are not a child and you want to become Catholic. I cannot believe that their pastor would baptize you against your will. Tell him yourself that you do not wish to be baptized.
 
dancer7777 said:
How can do this? What if they don’t listen to me and still force a baptism on me even when I refused?
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Have you talked to the Pastor of this Church and told him/her that you do NOT want to be baptized and are being forced against your will to do so? I would only hope no Pastor would baptize an unwilling person.

My prayers are with you.

Mary
 
dancer7777 said:
How can do this? What if they don’t listen to me and still force a baptism on me even when I refused?
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I think what we are trying to communicate is that we expect you to inform your parents that you are not going to be baptized and you aren’t going, and if they try to drag you you call the police. I don’t mean to sound so harsh but we are seeing it from a different perspective from you. We assume you live in North America, and have access to the police. We assume you have the right to self determination. Just because the parents tell an adult child something doesn’t mean you have to go along.
 
I live in North America. My mother told the pastor of Winner’s Chapel International Maryland (this is my parents’ church) that my brother and I do not want be baptized sided with my mother that we (my brother and I have to be baptised)
MaryT777 said:
Have you talked to the Pastor of this Church and told him/her that you do NOT want to be baptized and are being forced against your will to do so? I would only hope no Pastor would baptize an unwilling person.

My prayers are with you.

Mary
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MSSheBear said:
I think what we are trying to communicate is that we expect you to inform your parents that you are not going to be baptized and you aren’t going, and if they try to drag you you call the police. I don’t mean to sound so harsh but we are seeing it from a different perspective from you. We assume you live in North America, and have access to the police. We assume you have the right to self determination. Just because the parents tell an adult child something doesn’t mean you have to go along.
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Well - I’m going to dissent a bit here. Getting the police involved is a step too far. Dancer, I’m making the same transition as you, from Word of Faith, though luckily the folks I know are not anti-Catholic. They just see the Church as “dead” and without the “true power” of the Spirit, etc, I’m sure you’ve heard it all.

In any case, absolutely inform both your parents and the pastor of their church that you DO NOT wish to be baptized. I doubt the pastor will perform it against your will, as Pentecostal and Word of Faith churches generally practice “believers’ baptism.” The pastor will see it as invalid if it’s against your will. It’s not generally something they’ll do in an attempt to “cure” you of what they see as unbelief.

I can’t imagine any parents attempting to physically drag an adult child to the baptismal, but if they do, I say let them. Keep in mind that the Church recognizes any baptism done with the intent to baptize and in the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit. So you’re not breaking your promise, since all such baptisms are the same in the eyes of the Church. That’s the main reason for not fighting too hard, IMO.
 
Again, tell them no. Tell your mom you will call 911 if she tries to force you to go to her church or to be baptized against your will. **And then follow through. **They cannot force this on you!

Please contact the closest Catholic parish near you and ask to make an appointment to speak to a priest by phone if you have to.
 
Your parents are nuts. They are true psychos. You owe nothing to them. Hopefully, someday, they’ll get the psychiatric help they need. Hope that they do. Until then, tell them, point blank, you’re done with them, they’re nuts and psychos, and until they come around, they are dead to you. If you don’t, you will keep suffering. The choice is yours. You’ve managed to be a well-rounded person despite those vile people. Don’t try to rationalize it by saying they think what they’re doing is for your own good. Their beliefs are more important to them than you. If you, as their child, doesn’t come first over their beliefs, then they’re not worth the effort. These are demented, horrible people.
 
Culurecatholic said:
Your parents are nuts. They are true psychos. You owe nothing to them. Hopefully, someday, they’ll get the psychiatric help they need. Hope that they do. Until then, tell them, point blank, you’re done with them, they’re nuts and psychos, and until they come around, they are dead to you. If you don’t, you will keep suffering. The choice is yours. You’ve managed to be a well-rounded person despite those vile people. Don’t try to rationalize it by saying they think what they’re doing is for your own good. Their beliefs are more important to them than you. If you, as their child, doesn’t come first over their beliefs, then they’re not worth the effort. These are demented, horrible people.
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Agreed. Dancer, in addition to what I’ve already said, do make efforts to move out ASAP. Stay with friends or any sane relatives you may have if you can’t afford to live on your own.
 
cmbergin said:
Well - I’m going to dissent a bit here. Getting the police involved is a step too far. Dancer, I’m making the same transition as you, from Word of Faith, though luckily the folks I know are not anti-Catholic. They just see the Church as “dead” and without the “true power” of the Spirit, etc, I’m sure you’ve heard it all.

In any case, absolutely inform both your parents and the pastor of their church that you DO NOT wish to be baptized. I doubt the pastor will perform it against your will, as Pentecostal and Word of Faith churches generally practice “believers’ baptism.” The pastor will see it as invalid if it’s against your will. It’s not generally something they’ll do in an attempt to “cure” you of what they see as unbelief.

I can’t imagine any parents attempting to physically drag an adult child to the baptismal, but if they do, I say let them. Keep in mind that the Church recognizes any baptism done with the intent to baptize and in the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit. So you’re not breaking your promise, since all such baptisms are the same in the eyes of the Church. That’s the main reason for not fighting too hard, IMO.
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Please read her response on post #10. The pastor is going to do it regardless. What else is this young woman forced to endure at home with these abusive people? Good grief!! They are basically holding her against her will. Makes me wonder if her posting the name of the church and location is a cry for outside help to get her away from these mentally ill parents of hers.

OP- you’ve mentioned in this thread and previous ones about attending/graduating college…is there anyone from your uni days you can move in with to get away from this abuse?
 
I will keep you in my prayers. :hug1: If I was in your situation I would:
  1. Start looking for my own place (assuming you have a job). If you don’t have a job, make finding one a priority so you can move out asap.
  2. I would call the nearest Catholic parish and speak to the Priest and ask for his advice/assistance. Perhaps he can talk to the pastor and your parents.
  3. Pray for your parents and their pastor.
  4. I would let the Police know about the situation although they may not do much because no crime has been committed. You should make yourself known to someone at your local police station so they are AWARE of your circumstances.
 
dancer7777 said:
Hello All. I have been learning and growing with the Roman Catholic Church for nearly 4-7 years since high school. I am having a problem and would like your help or advice. My family are Protestant/Pentecostal (Prosperity Gospel), and they are forcing me against by free will to get baptise in their church and in their religion. So, there is no way getting out of it. I made a promise several years ago that I will one day go through the Rite of Christian Initation for Adults (RCIA) and and join the Catholic Church family. I have received wisdom from the Catholic teachings, EWTN/Mother Angelica that spoke to several life situations I was facing, especially accepting and embracing having a learning disability. Mother Angelica’s Live had a program regarding disability that spoke to me. Unfortunately, my parents doesn’t support my decision to become Catholic. They won’t let me attend Mass nor any Catholic event or watch/read anything Catholic. They do not even acknowledge my disability saying “it is from the devil and is a part of witchcraft and occultism, and is a curse”. They also say this to my brother who has autism. They just want us to be permanently healed of disability. I watch the National Shrine TV Mass every Sunday morning in another room before going to the parents’ church. I also read Catholic literature on my own time. I am not comfortable being baptise in a different faith because I made a promise to myself to join the Catholic Church. The timing isn’t right (parents are forcing me to be baptise within the second week of March 2017). What should I do? I am 25 years of age and a female. My parents do not give free will to do anything or me to make own decisions. They force me every morning to attend their church which is titled “Winner’s Chapel International” which an all-African church and I never felt I truly belonged there. I always felt during my time in high school, catholic, and being a part of the college’s catholic club that I belong with the Catholic Church.
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What would happen if you told them you would not go? You would not walk out of the house, you would not get in the car, etc?

This would absolutely NOT be a matter of dishonoring your parents (4th commandment: Honor thy father and mother); because once a child is an adult, he or she is allowed to make certain decisions against the will of the parents, for example, in matters of one’s work, marriage, and *religion. *

What resources do you have? You say you are disabled, but want to drive, so your disability doesn’t cause a probelm driving. Can you drive? Do you have access to a car?

What about your brother with autism? Is he an adult yet? Would he be willing to join you in refusing to be baptised?

Do you have friends or relatives who would help you, or even let you stay with them while you got organized to be on your own?

Are there places for people with your disability to go, or who would help you relocate?
 
dancer7777 said:
Hello All. I have been learning and growing with the Roman Catholic Church for nearly 4-7 years since high school. I am having a problem and would like your help or advice. My family are Protestant/Pentecostal (Prosperity Gospel), and they are forcing me against by free will to get baptise in their church and in their religion. So, there is no way getting out of it. I made a promise several years ago that I will one day go through the Rite of Christian Initation for Adults (RCIA) and and join the Catholic Church family. I have received wisdom from the Catholic teachings, EWTN/Mother Angelica that spoke to several life situations I was facing, especially accepting and embracing having a learning disability. Mother Angelica’s Live had a program regarding disability that spoke to me. Unfortunately, my parents doesn’t support my decision to become Catholic. They won’t let me attend Mass nor any Catholic event or watch/read anything Catholic. They do not even acknowledge my disability saying “it is from the devil and is a part of witchcraft and occultism, and is a curse”. They also say this to my brother who has autism. They just want us to be permanently healed of disability. I watch the National Shrine TV Mass every Sunday morning in another room before going to the parents’ church. I also read Catholic literature on my own time. I am not comfortable being baptise in a different faith because I made a promise to myself to join the Catholic Church. The timing isn’t right (parents are forcing me to be baptise within the second week of March 2017). What should I do? I am 25 years of age and a female. My parents do not give free will to do anything or me to make own decisions. They force me every morning to attend their church which is titled “Winner’s Chapel International” which an all-African church and I never felt I truly belonged there. I always felt during my time in high school, catholic, and being a part of the college’s catholic club that I belong with the Catholic Church.
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Fundamentalist are against infant Baptism because they say one must choose to be Baptized through ones own free will.
 
Hi Dancer,
Seems like your parents are trying to do the best thing for you by their beliefs, which is what parents are supposed to do. It may help to say that you do want baptism, but your mind, heart and soul are called strongly to the Catholic Church. Many times we suffer for our faith, inside and outside the church, but abide by the truth that you’re called to, with hope, faith and love. I pray for both you and you’re family that through this trial a greater joy may come than you ever hoped for.

From what you have said, you’re family seems to be facing hardships not all of us are familiar with, but you’re calling looks strong enough to bring you through.

If you haven’t already, watch some of the EWTN Coming Home series on YouTube, where many have overcome great difficulties to enter the church.

Peace+
micnaEl?
 
You stated you are 25 years old and your parents do not let you have free will to do anything on your own or make decisions for yourself. Do you have a job? Are you able to support yourself? Is there a reason you cannot move out & live on your own? There appears to be much more going on in your family dynamics that need to be addressed. Perhaps some professional support may be in order.
 
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