Found a description of a 1950's housewife!!

  • Thread starter Thread starter Lil_Cat
  • Start date Start date
Status
Not open for further replies.
Hmmm? :hmmm:I wonder what the divorce rate was like in the 50’s?

(I better duck for cover)
I don’t know, but it’s things like this that make me understand why women started burning their bras in the 1960s.

My great grandmothers and my grandmothers all had part-time jobs and spending money of their own, and it didn’t harm their marriages at all.
 
I’m fairly certain it’s genuine actually. I think one of my History teachers might have shown us the same list at one point, and they bring it up in T.V. shows from time to time.

Don’t know, all of them seem quite sensible to me 🤷. Unfortunately Home Ec lessons aren’t what they used to be, pity standards have declined so much in a relatively short time :p.
It’s an urban legend.

And, anybody who thinks that a wife shouldn’t say anything if her husband stays out all night needs their head examined. That wouldn’t be in any way good for a man’s spiritual health.

snopes.com/language/document/goodwife.asp
 
I take great pride in being a house wife and mother.
I do have the house clean and quite when hubby comes home and a hot meal on the table and i ask him how his day was…etc

I love sweeping and mopping and cooking and making sure the kids are doing their homework…etc

I have a saying “I don’t work outside the house, and my husband doesn’t work inside the house.”

I LOVE to serve my husband! Although sometimes I think I spoil him too much. This occured to me the other day when I realized he couldn’t cook a potato.

😃
 
Y’all might want to consider the context and the audience for this description.

First: The 1950s. Remember, a lot of the women who’d be reading this wouldn’t be the starry-eyed 22 year old brides, but the 30 and 40 something crowd. . .many of whom had been on the front lines 10 years before while the men were at war. IOW, they had done both ‘a man’s job’ **and **a woman’s job as well. Quite a few of them were quite frankly pleased to be ‘back’ in the home and still thankful enough to have the husbands back alive from the war.

But of course, the rebellious years were also in play. . .and so the starry eyed brides who maybe a year or two ago had been making fun of dear old dad are being encouraged to remember the sacrifices of both dad and mom, and to be thankful to have a chance for ‘normal’ life. . .rationing over, no threats of Nazis, no having to spend 18 hours a day running from hospital guild to the factory shift and then back home to cook and clean, only to rise at 5 a… and do it all over again, with no husband to help.

So. . . seeing the historical context makes it a little clearer.

The other thing to consider is the rise of the middle class to whom a lot of this was addressed. The wealthy had ‘help’ (my own mom’s first job after high school was as a live-in maid to a wealthy local political family). The poor didn’t have the luxury of mom at home–it was the poor mom who was usually out working as ‘hired help’, either to supplement hubby’s minimum wage or less income, or as a single mother. While the illegitimate birth rates and/or the divorce rates in the 1950s were still low, they were higher among the poor and people of color who were more likely to be poor than to be middle class or wealthy.

So you have also the ‘wish fulfilment’ factor. Take a girl who was poor, and she marries a man who is maybe just hitting middle class. . .and suddenly, instead of her having to both raise her family and work outside the home, the ‘standard’ presented to her is being the stay at home mom. Again, there would be gratitude at an easier life than she would have known or expected. Which also helps to put the article into context.

Hope this helps!
 
On my block in the mid 60’s you could count on one hand who was on Valium. It wasn’t my mother. She was the radical of the housewives. Most the neighborhood ladies “waited” for their husbands to do “something”…like paint the house, clean out the attic, the garage, paint a room, change a light bulb, change a tire. My mother did all of that. My dad was appreciative…but played the “macho Italian man”…letting others think he was the driving force behind her efforts. She was a SAHM. She saw to it that dad took us to Mass, and we went to catechism. If she had a question she would call the rectory.

In our comfortable Stepford neighborhood we weren’t allowed to play in some yards…because “mom” had a “headache”. That was “cue” for…she took a valuim and is down for the count and doesn’t want a bunch of kids in the yard. My mother had hard and fast rules. If kids were in the yard getting along…fine…play …if fights broke out…it’s over…go home. My mom knew the game. I often wished she had fullfilled her dream and worked outside the home.

There were alot of unhappy housewives during that period 1950-1970. My mother didn’t sit and wait for daddy to come home and do the stuff he needed to do…she was his “help mate”. After working all week in “blue collar” job (BIG difference than sitting up in a suit in an A/C office all day)…she jumped in and helped him. She learned to do things. The neighbor ladies would marvel how she could use a table saw and electric drill and didn’t need to consult my dad about the wallpaper for the bathroom.

She didn’t get her license until '65 because she believed like most housewives…I don’t need it. We had a auto trans car. In MA at the time there were to license procedures. If you got an auto trans license you could only drive auto trans vehicles. Dad got the brilliant idea (without saying a word) to drive up in the driveway with a standard Chevrolet new car. Mom couldn’t drive it. Undaunted, she called her dad who was in town at the time and asked him to teach her to drive a standard. Meantime she said nothing to my dad. After dinner one night she announced she was going to join a bowling league on Monday nights. He said, “you don’t have the right license so you can’t drive it”. She flopped her new license down in front of him and said, “Now go buy a Mac truck, and I’ll drive that”.

You’ve come a long way baby! Love ya ma!
My mom stayed at home until the youngest child started school and then spent 30 years as a teacher. Unfortunately the school she taught at was the same one I was going to. It was like having a parent teacher conference every day.

When I look back on my mom and dad’s relationship there really was no head of the household- they just did what was necessary to raise their kids the best way they knew how. My mom was a college graduate and had a masters degree in math. My father went off to the War straight out of high school and never returned to school. He was the smartest man I have ever known. Of course this little to do with the topic at hand, butI am feeling a little melancholy
on a rainy afternoon in the mountains.
 
I take great pride in being a house wife and mother.
I do have the house clean and quite when hubby comes home and a hot meal on the table and i ask him how his day was…etc

I love sweeping and mopping and cooking and making sure the kids are doing their homework…etc

I have a saying “I don’t work outside the house, and my husband doesn’t work inside the house.”

I LOVE to serve my husband! Although sometimes I think I spoil him too much. This occured to me the other day when I realized he couldn’t cook a potato.

😃
Will you marry me? 😃 I loathe housework and love yard work.

I like to eat so I cook, but so does DH and we pretty much take turns. Every husband should be able to cook a basic meal.

Even in my family, where mom was a SAHM and dad’s meal was on the table when he came home from work, mom would go off to her sisters’ for the occasional weekend, leaving dad do the cooking and housework and keep us in line. The only thing he didn’t do was laundry, at least not until mom got an automatic washer.

Considering he survived Mom by 18 years, it was good training for him. He lived on his own, cooking and cleaning a huge farm house from the age of 72 to 89 and only knee surgery forced him to move in with my brother a few months before his 90th birthday.
 
On my block in the mid 60’s you could count on one hand who was on Valium. It wasn’t my mother. She was the radical of the housewives. Most the neighborhood ladies “waited” for their husbands to do “something”…like paint the house, clean out the attic, the garage, paint a room, change a light bulb, change a tire. My mother did all of that. My dad was appreciative…but played the “macho Italian man”…letting others think he was the driving force behind her efforts. She was a SAHM. She saw to it that dad took us to Mass, and we went to catechism. If she had a question she would call the rectory.

In our comfortable Stepford neighborhood we weren’t allowed to play in some yards…because “mom” had a “headache”. That was “cue” for…she took a valuim and is down for the count and doesn’t want a bunch of kids in the yard. My mother had hard and fast rules. If kids were in the yard getting along…fine…play …if fights broke out…it’s over…go home. My mom knew the game. I often wished she had fullfilled her dream and worked outside the home.

There were alot of unhappy housewives during that period 1950-1970. My mother didn’t sit and wait for daddy to come home and do the stuff he needed to do…she was his “help mate”. After working all week in “blue collar” job (BIG difference than sitting up in a suit in an A/C office all day)…she jumped in and helped him. She learned to do things. The neighbor ladies would marvel how she could use a table saw and electric drill and didn’t need to consult my dad about the wallpaper for the bathroom.

She didn’t get her license until '65 because she believed like most housewives…I don’t need it. We had a auto trans car. In MA at the time there were to license procedures. If you got an auto trans license you could only drive auto trans vehicles. Dad got the brilliant idea (without saying a word) to drive up in the driveway with a standard Chevrolet new car. Mom couldn’t drive it. Undaunted, she called her dad who was in town at the time and asked him to teach her to drive a standard. Meantime she said nothing to my dad. After dinner one night she announced she was going to join a bowling league on Monday nights. He said, “you don’t have the right license so you can’t drive it”. She flopped her new license down in front of him and said, “Now go buy a Mac truck, and I’ll drive that”.

You’ve come a long way baby! Love ya ma!
“a lot of unhappy housewives” Not true. That is an overgeneralization of the 1950-1970 time period. A significant number of dads in the neighborhood were World War II vets, like my Dad. They just wanted to raise a family in a place that wasn’t bombed out with bullets flying over their heads.

What clearly happened in the late 1960s was a sexual revolution designed to sell more birth control pills (even priests and some nuns got into the act of denouncing Humanae Vitae in 1968; no coincidence there). And Pope Paul VI warned everyone what would happen - your one true love would become less and less so as these new very bad “choices” appeared. Swingers and wife-swapping in the 1970s, along with legalized abortion to cover the mistakes of artificial birth control. Then by the end of the 70s, another group of radical perverts sowing distrust between married couples, which helped to market No-Fault Divorce in the 1980s. Followed in the 1990s by No-Fault Parenting – 18 and out of the house!

You’ve gone in the wrong direction for too long baby!

It’s time to return to the Church my fellow Catholics. It’s time to denounce the radical, anti-family voices. Stability in familial relationships needs to restored.

God bless,
Ed
 
“a lot of unhappy housewives” Not true. That is an overgeneralization of the 1950-1970 time period. Not so according to stats and my experience…I knew some of my friends moms were on “tranquilizers”.A significant number of dads in the neighborhood were World War II vets, like my Dad.My dad went to Japan after the war. They just wanted to raise a family in a place that wasn’t bombed out with bullets flying over their heads.My dad thought he had a “southern gem” of a wife and would be the perfect as described “housewife”. After awhile, she said she “grew a brain”.

What clearly happened in the late 1960s was a sexual revolution designed to sell more birth control pills (even priests and some nuns got into the act of denouncing Humanae Vitae in 1968; no coincidence there). My mother, a Baptist used vatican roulette and never took birth control. Nor did she take “tranquilizers”.And Pope Paul VI warned everyone what would happen - your one true love would become less and less so as these new very bad “choices” appeared.Because women refused to have sit down with their husbands. My mother had sit downs…both dad and mom worked “together” because of it. My mother didn’t play a role. Swingers and wife-swapping in the 1970s, along with legalized abortion to cover the mistakes of artificial birth control. Yeah that did go on in one section of my neighborhood. Sad and destructive. The kids in that house were older than I, but they would never be the same because of the fall out.Then by the end of the 70s, another group of radical perverts sowing distrust between married couples, which helped to market No-Fault Divorce in the 1980s. Followed in the 1990s by No-Fault Parenting – 18 and out of the house!My son is 25 and still in the house. I didn’t have the rule of 18 and out. I wanted to make sure they got the tools they needed so they didn’t boomerang on me. 😃

You’ve gone in the wrong direction for too long baby!

It’s time to return to the Church my fellow Catholics. It’s time to denounce the radical, anti-family voices. Stability in familial relationships needs to restored.

God bless,
Ed
I totally agree that the no fault divorce was the final straw. I am for stability in familial relationships. I may disagree on the “how”.
My mother was not a typical housewife. She was a true Steel Magnolia back in the child rearing days. She didn’t “ask permission” of my dad (although he would have loved it) for anything. She painted the kitchen and when he got home, dinner was on the table and the kitchen was a different color, along with new curtains, tablecloth, placemats and napkins she made herself to match…while her neighbor ladies were lying on the couch in a valium haze…because they were taught “the husband will take care of you”…brain is not required.
 
Let’s examine the scenarios:

A young woman in her teens living with her parents. She sees how mom behaves and how dad behaves. She has friends and she sees how their parents behave.

She gets a little older and starts thinking about marriage and kids. Mom and dad are still there. Perhaps a few of her friends are already married and are giving her feedback. Anyway, she has a good idea about what to expect.

In the 50s and early 60s, dates were with chaperones. Parents were more respected along with the Church. You were told to come home at a certain hour and the Church advised young men and young ladies about permissable conduct during dates.

You decide the guy you’re with is not an ax-murderer and has no apparent psychological problems. You meet his folks, he meets your folks. Your dad sits this guy down to ask him how he is going to provide for his daughter. He also judges this young man’s character. He doesn’t want his daughter to end up crying and with black eyes after the fact. So, your dad tells you that your husband to be does not appear to be a lazy good for nothing, and will follow through on his commitment to you and the kids.

During the engagement period, the two of you work out the house, the car and work and responsibilities. You talk about your kids to come and how you imagine life will be. Dad reminds his daughter that if she’s not sure, she can call the whole thing off at any time.

At the altar, the priest tells the couple that marriage is a sacred and holy estate not to be entered into lightly. In sickness and in health, for better or worse. The priest is telling the couple there are no guarantees but assures them that through this sacrament, God will be with them and provide them grace.

Then… the National Organiztion for Women walks in and tells women they are victims - eternal victims of the men in their lives. Men are evil – all men. Dump the one you have now so you can be free to do what you really want to do.

Uh huh. Yeah, right. Free…

Catholic women should realize how badly they were lied to. That the goal was to divide the house against itself so it would fall. NOW created permanent, irrevocable victimhood for women by creating men as the eternal enemy. This poison affects male-female relationships to this day.

Peace,
Ed
 
How come I rarely if ever see threads on here about men pleasing their wives? It all seems to be about women doting on their husbands and this is hopefully, going to keep everything a-ok. It saddens me that there aren’t more threads devoted to women, posted by men, on how to be good husbands. 😦 Having a good marriage takes two committed people, wishing to grow in holiness together. It is about serving one another. I cringed when I read the post in this thread stating…‘I wonder how many divorces there were back then,’ as if women should be the only side keeping things together.

I just wish I’d see more threads about the equal partnership of marriage, and that it isn’t all upon a woman’s back.
 
I think that’s a fake - it’s not really from some 1950’s Home Ec textbook or woman’s magazine or whatever. I think there are a few things from Fascinating Womanhood or similar sources, and then somebody went and embellished with a post-modern idea of what people in the 50’s would have thought.

Having the house clean and urging your husband to relax when he gets home is a sensible suggestion. Never questioning behaviour like staying out all night is not.
Actually I have seen this original article. It was in Good Housekeeping or something like that. We saw it when I was in 7th grade FHA (Future Homemakers of America) back in the 70’s.

Hope it’s not under copyright, or we’re breakin some rules here…lol

Different times…different standards…
 
From a Home Economics class in the 1950’s…
  • Have dinner ready. Plan ahead, even the night before, to have a delicious meal ready on time for his return. This is a way of letting him know that you have be thinking about him and are concerned about his needs. Most men are hungry when they get home and the prospect of a good meal is part of the warm welcome needed.
    Doable. But never good enough for him.
  • Prepare yourself. Take 15 minutes to rest so you’ll be refreshed when he arrives. Touch up your make-up, put a ribbon in your hair and be fresh-looking. He has just been with a lot of work-weary people.
    Doable.
  • Be a little gay and a little more interesting for him. His boring day may need a lift and one of your duties is to provide it.
I was always told to Shut Up.
  • Clear away the clutter. Make one last trip through the main part of the house just before your husband arrives. Run a dustcloth over the tables.
    Doable. And I did this. Pleasant enoug for all, too.
  • During the cooler months of the year you should prepare and light a fire for him to unwind by. Your husband will feel he has reached a haven of rest and order, and it will give you a lift too. After all, catering to his comfort will provide you with immense personal satisfaction.
  • Minimize all noise. At the time of his arrival, eliminate all noise of the washer, dryer or vacuum. Encourage the children to be quiet.
    Hard to do this one, considering.
  • Be happy to see him.
    Yes! And I hope he’s happy to see me as well!
  • Greet him with a warm smile and show sincerity in your desire to please him.
  • Listen to him. You may have a dozen important things to tell him, but the moment of his arrival is not the time. Let him talk first - remember, his topics of conversation are more important than yours.
    I don’t think so. We each are important to each other. Perhaps I’ll wait till he gets his shoes off…
  • Don’t greet him with complaints and problems.
    See above
  • Don’t complain if he’s late for dinner or even if he stays out all night. Count this as minor compared to what he might have gone through at work.
    While I do care what went on at work, shift priorities and be considerate to your wife and family, man! You expect me to run things for you while at work? Be home for dinner, or call & give an arrival time & KEEP IT!* Make him comfortable. Have him lean back in a comfortable chair or lie him down in the bedroom. Have a cool or warm drink ready for him.
  • Arrange his pillow and offer to take off his shoes. Speak in a low, soothing and pleasant voice.
    Why, is he ill?
  • Don’t ask him questions about his actions or question his judgment or integrity. Remember, he is the master of the house and as such will always exercise his will with fairness and truthfulness. You have no right to question him.
    I gotta wonder if this describes the wife who, upon her husband’s death, can’t find the important papers??
  • A good wife always knows her place.
    Boy, no wonder my marriage failed!
Sooooooo…
What’s the general concensus about this? Should women be doing this? Why or why not? Guys, I would like your opinion too 🙂
 
Let’s examine the scenarios:

A young woman in her teens living with her parents. She sees how mom behaves and how dad behaves. She has friends and she sees how their parents behave.

She gets a little older and starts thinking about marriage and kids. Mom and dad are still there. Perhaps a few of her friends are already married and are giving her feedback. Anyway, she has a good idea about what to expect.

In the 50s and early 60s, dates were with chaperones. Parents were more respected along with the Church. You were told to come home at a certain hour and the Church advised young men and young ladies about permissable conduct during dates.

You decide the guy you’re with is not an ax-murderer and has no apparent psychological problems. You meet his folks, he meets your folks. Your dad sits this guy down to ask him how he is going to provide for his daughter. He also judges this young man’s character. He doesn’t want his daughter to end up crying and with black eyes after the fact. So, your dad tells you that your husband to be does not appear to be a lazy good for nothing, and will follow through on his commitment to you and the kids.

During the engagement period, the two of you work out the house, the car and work and responsibilities. You talk about your kids to come and how you imagine life will be. Dad reminds his daughter that if she’s not sure, she can call the whole thing off at any time.

At the altar, the priest tells the couple that marriage is a sacred and holy estate not to be entered into lightly. In sickness and in health, for better or worse. The priest is telling the couple there are no guarantees but assures them that through this sacrament, God will be with them and provide them grace.

Then… the National Organiztion for Women walks in and tells women they are victims - eternal victims of the men in their lives. Men are evil – all men. Dump the one you have now so you can be free to do what you really want to do.

Uh huh. Yeah, right. Free…

Catholic women should realize how badly they were lied to. That the goal was to divide the house against itself so it would fall. NOW created permanent, irrevocable victimhood for women by creating men as the eternal enemy. This poison affects male-female relationships to this day.

Peace,
Ed
Ed,
I am no fan of the National Organization of (I don’t what kind) of Women. It reminds me somewhat of an old saying. I have seen the enemy and she is us! The organization that was to be for all women is only for a few that run hard to the left extreme. Ah there it is…“extreme”. Sometimes people can’t help it but run too far in one direction.

At the altar I heard everything the priest said. (except obey, because it is not used anymore) My DH and I knew it was a sacrament and what it entailed. And 27 yrs later…here we are. My parents, a Baptist and a Catholic, married in the Church almost made it to 50 yrs. (dad passed away 2006)

I am all for a spouse suing for “alienation of affection” and receivng just compensation. It works in NC and those who think adultery is what everybody does is now in for a rude awakening. I believe if a man cheats on his wife, he leaves with his toothbrush and clothes. If a woman cheats on her husband, she needs to find a good lawyer because getting custody of the children will be difficult. If a man beats his wife…good by Charlie…she can get a divorce within 6 months and be provided shelter and food away from the batterer. His wages will be garnished until the kids are out of college.

If a stud or honey knows they are going to be sued…they may think twice before messing with a married person.

I do not think a woman should go from her parents house to married home. She needs a full education, training/skill…her own place, her own money, her own credit before considering marriage. It’s great that you make a great toll house cookie, but that won’t pay the rent and feed the kids when he cleans out the bank account that has been in “HIS” name since the marriage. (same with house) This is where some women are their own worst enemies. Alot of those 50’s 60’s 70’s women were left out in the cold when a divorce happened…and it was always scandal for the woman and not the man. A woman’s independence begins with her own money. Yes, my mom taught me that. She didn’t have it…so she had to work at it to get my dad’s respect. He got the message tootsweet and realized she was an important part of marriage and family.

I’m not as far to the left as you and some others think. Change happens within and spreads outward. In my family all it took was for my mother to say…“hey…let’s talk boy-o”. My mother didn’t get too hung up on “obey”.

to whatevergirl…oh yeah I get ya on the good man thing. My DH treats me like a princess. He cooks, I had two c sections he changed his shift at work so he could be up with baby at night. I never had to get up in the middle of the night. DH was right there. He is my heart. My children who are now grown appreciate that their parents stayed together and loved each other just as we are commanded to do.
 
You know what? I can cook all kinds of food, I don’t mind cleaning in some respect, and I am a good Catholic girl.

You know something else? I’m not rushing to get married and I have a few things to say.

Guys should NOT be completely helpless in the house, regardless of whether he’s the bread winner, she is, or they both work, for whatever reasons. They also should know how to cook (my Italian/Hispanic guy friends are AMAZING cooks!). Are they babies? Are they completely helpless? No! Let the couple decide TOGETHER what chores will be done.

No, a woman should not be rushing from her parents’ home to her husband’s. I think it’s vital that a woman is well educated, has worked for a few years, and has established her own savings and credit. Seriously. When she marries, she doesn’t stop being an independent adult. She’s a wife, not a child and she needs to be able to grow up and stand on her own two feet. There are some horrible, selfish, misogynistic men who would LOVE to take advantage of a woman who had none of these things.

I don’t need extra guardianship because I’m a woman. My intellectual ability isn’t lessened because I’m a woman. Neither is my working ability. I’m not a delicate flower about to die if someone as much as breathes on me. I have no interest in dating right now any way. I like that I’m getting a degree, I like making my own money. Also, what if God doesn’t mean for a person to marry till they’re in their 30’s or 40’s? Do you really expect a girl to live at home till then??

As for the SAHM thing, that’s for the couple in question to decide what works for the family. For some families, it’s SAHM, some it’s SAHD, some, both parents work and the kids are fine.
 
How come I rarely if ever see threads on here about men pleasing their wives? It all seems to be about women doting on their husbands and this is hopefully, going to keep everything a-ok. It saddens me that there aren’t more threads devoted to women, posted by men, on how to be good husbands. 😦 Having a good marriage takes two committed people, wishing to grow in holiness together. It is about serving one another. I cringed when I read the post in this thread stating…‘I wonder how many divorces there were back then,’ as if women should be the only side keeping things together.

I just wish I’d see more threads about the equal partnership of marriage, and that it isn’t all upon a woman’s back.
Haven’t you been reading BamaRider’s posts?
 
It’s an urban legend.

And, anybody who thinks that a wife shouldn’t say anything if her husband stays out all night needs their head examined. That wouldn’t be in any way good for a man’s spiritual health.

snopes.com/language/document/goodwife.asp
I might be missing something in that article, but it seems to be saying that it is inconclusive. The source may not have been found but that wouldn’t be entirely unusual, and as it points out it is a reasonable reflection of some of the ‘rules’ at the time. Although it may place apparently undue emphasis on the ‘servile’ aspects again some schools may have been teaching those concepts around that period as well.

That is presupposing a man would always be up to no good if he were out all night though, and remember “you have no right to question him”. I think the staying out all night would probably be with the expectation that the husband would inform her why he’d been out at an appropriate time of his own choosing.
 
My take on the list:
From a Home Economics class in the 1950’s…
  • Have dinner ready. Plan ahead, even the night before, to have a delicious meal ready on time for his return. This is a way of letting him know that you have be thinking about him and are concerned about his needs. Most men are hungry when they get home and the prospect of a good meal is part of the warm welcome needed. Nathan, are you reading this?!? You should have dinner ready when I get home!
  • Prepare yourself. Take 15 minutes to rest so you’ll be refreshed when he arrives. Touch up your make-up, put a ribbon in your hair and be fresh-looking. He has just been with a lot of work-weary people. This means when I come home you shouldn’t have on gym shorts and a t-shirt. I expect khakis and a polo!
  • Be a little gay and a little more interesting for him. His boring day may need a lift and one of your duties is to provide it. HAHA.
  • Clear away the clutter. Make one last trip through the main part of the house just before your husband arrives. Run a dustcloth over the tables. Don’t we pay someone to do this for us?
  • During the cooler months of the year you should prepare and light a fire for him to unwind by. Your husband will feel he has reached a haven of rest and order, and it will give you a lift too. After all, catering to his comfort will provide you with immense personal satisfaction. Not applicable…unless you count the grill outside.
  • Minimize all noise. At the time of his arrival, eliminate all noise of the washer, dryer or vacuum. Encourage the children to be quiet. The pug barks like crazy when I get home! We don’t do laundry 😉 so no problem there…and vacuum? again…we pay someone for that.
  • Be happy to see him.
  • Greet him with a warm smile and show sincerity in your desire to please him. Always does!
  • Listen to him. You may have a dozen important things to tell him, but the moment of his arrival is not the time. Let him talk first - remember, his topics of conversation are more important than yours. This is a tough one. Whose day is more important? He writes from home. I work in an office…
  • Don’t greet him with complaints and problems. Too late.
  • Don’t complain if he’s late for dinner or even if he stays out all night. Count this as minor compared to what he might have gone through at work. **You’re right I won’t complain. I’ll just lock him out…or better yet the glare of death. :eek: **
  • Make him comfortable. Have him lean back in a comfortable chair or lie him down in the bedroom. Have a cool or warm drink ready for him. I’ll take a glass of red wine, please.
  • Arrange his pillow and offer to take off his shoes. Speak in a low, soothing and pleasant voice. Hmmm…what?
  • Don’t ask him questions about his actions or question his judgment or integrity. Remember, he is the master of the house and as such will always exercise his will with fairness and truthfulness. You have no right to question him. So am I the master or is he the master?
  • A good wife always knows her place. Yep. Working.
It is interesting, because I am the spouse that works full time. So does that mean the roles reverse? Is Nathan expected to be a 1950s housewife?

I’m considering pullin’ a Bama on this one and posting it in the bathroom…except I am going to cross out the word wife and replace with husband… 🤷
 
I might be missing something in that article, but it seems to be saying that it is inconclusive. The source may not have been found but that wouldn’t be entirely unusual, and as it points out it is a reasonable reflection of some of the ‘rules’ at the time. Although it may place apparently undue emphasis on the ‘servile’ aspects again some schools may have been teaching those concepts around that period as well.

That is presupposing a man would always be up to no good if he were out all night though, and remember “you have no right to question him”. I think the staying out all night would probably be with the expectation that the husband would inform her why he’d been out at an appropriate time of his own choosing.
No, I really don’t think so. I don’t think there was ever a time when people taught schoolgirls in Home Ec class that you don’t question where the husband has been all night long. I think it has always been assumed that a husband who stays out all night without giving any explanation is up to no good. That’s simply common sense. It’s obvious that part was clearly written in by someone who had a warped view of the way things were in the 50’s. This supposed document is a fabrication meant to undermine traditional family roles.

Snopes is only saying that it has not been proven to be fake. I think the fact that the original has never been found is telling. I’m sure if the original source existed, someone would have produced it by now.

I have to say that I’m a little surprised that so many people here are A) accepting this on face value and B) agreeing with it. I think the whole “have the house clean and let Dad relax when he gets home” is a fantastic idea. But surely nobody here really thinks that you don’t ask your husband where the heck he’s been if he stays out all night. :rolleyes:
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top