Friend receiving communion without Confession

[GwenL]

No, I know his schedule. He could find time if he really wanted to. And, even if he couldn’t before, he could now that he knows he can call for appointments. I even gave him a suggestion as to a parish that offers scheduled confessions.

And Buster, as I noted above, “inconvenience” does not meet the requirements of Canon 916 to allow one to receive Holy Communion while in mortal sin after a perfect act of contrition.

If people would just think this through, it’d be obvious. If Canon 916 applied to any layperson who couldn’t make it to confession at their convenience, or was uncomfortable with confession, why would anyone ever go to confession? If Canon 916 applied like this, it would make confession unnecessary.

 

[Corki]

If he tells the priest, it’s only a partial confession, there will not be a problem, nor will he be told by the priest that after wards, he’s in a state of grace. It’s the intent that matters, all that is necessary for most people is to get into the confessional, it’s natural for them to desire for a full and complete confession once they begin.

There is no such thing as a “partial confession”. The penitent must confess all grave sins he remembers in number and kind. A priest would not give absolution if the penitent told him he was only going to confess a portion of his sins.

 

[Corki]

You might also be misinterpreting what the person is saying. Maybe inconvenience means, “confession is only offered on weekdays and I have to miss work to go to confession.”

It doesn’t matter. Based on the information given in the OP, no grave reason exists - the first element of canon 916. Without a grave reason, no level of inconvenience or hardship applies.

 

[Kolbelover]

the original poster sounds like a good friend who is trying to help his friend avoid serious sin… this is laudable,although at times,difficult!

I have been in similar situations several times. It sounds to me like the friend has fear/anxiety/embarrassment about reconciliation… For many fallen away Catholics,these feelings may be the result of real wounds resulting from bad experience(s) with the Sacrament as a child. I would suggest that the friend make an appointment to speak with a priest… and advise him simply to say, “Father,I have not been to Confession in x years…and I need some spiritual guidance so that I may receive Communion”… Most of our priests truly do"shine" in a situation like this!

pray for your friend’s conversion…ask him to spend time in Adoration too! I will pray for him and you as well!

k~

 

[ConstantineTG]

It doesn’t matter. Based on the information given in the OP, no grave reason exists - the first element of canon 916. Without a grave reason, no level of inconvenience or hardship applies.

Note that the OP gave the additional information after I made my comment.

And of course the real reason always matters.

 

[cjforJesus]

He asked if I wanted to go to Mass together tonight, so he, my wife, and I went to Mass together, and he received Communion. After Mass, I talked to him about this, and he informed me he still hasn’t gone to Confession. He said he wants to go but hasn’t been able to match up his schedule. I explained the urgency of going before receiving Communion again (and why), but he still said that he’s going to receive Communion regardless because he’s prayed about being sorry and he plans on going to Confession as soon as he can. He also doesn’t want to discuss it any further.

You explained to him the urgency and why he must go to confession.I believe you have done all you can do and now it is between your friend and God.

I don’t know that refusing to go to mass with him would make a difference or put you in a state of sin if you did attend with him.

 

[streetpreacher]

There is no such thing as a “partial confession”. The penitent must confess all grave sins he remembers in number and kind. A priest would not give absolution if the penitent told him he was only going to confess a portion of his sins.

I didn’t come up with the idea, it’s from a priest talking about this matter on a Catholic radio station, one this place spends a lot of dough advertising upon. Does the confessor get absolution in full, nope, but they get absolution to the few sins they did confess. If someone feels the desire to wade in the water before diving into the deep side, if this makes them feel more comfortable, then it’s far better then not getting in the water at all don’t you think?

The very last thing we as Catholics should ever do to a person, especially someone returning to the church is to become so rigid and unyielding, so strict and overbearing, that to utterly shun anything other then absolute perfection along how they practice their faith, “such as what the pharisees did”, if this is what we are about and what we consider all others that approach it, we are in complete error. It’s never a matter of a single person being in 100 percent’s, it’s about the ideal we strive for, and some of us are closer to it then others, never judge those not as far along the path, less you get tossed to the back of the line and are taught humility in the process.

 

[Seatuck]

It is acceptable to make an act of perfect contrition before receiving Communion but those who do are urged to go to confession ASAP. Perhaps that trust that what he prayed for is such an act and continue urging him to seek confession ASAP. It will be very difficult not having gone to confession for quite a long time. Be encouraging and be careful not to sound critical.

It’s only acceptable in case of emergency of if there is no confession available. This is not the case for our gentleman.

 

[Seatuck]

I didn’t come up with the idea, it’s from a priest talking about this matter on a Catholic radio station, one this place spends a lot of dough advertising upon. Does the confessor get absolution in full, nope, but they get absolution to the few sins they did confess. If someone feels the desire to wade in the water before diving into the deep side, if this makes them feel more comfortable, then it’s far better then not getting in the water at all don’t you think?

The very last thing we as Catholics should ever do to a person, especially someone returning to the church is to become so rigid and unyielding, so strict and overbearing, that to utterly shun anything other then absolute perfection along how they practice their faith, “such as what the pharisees did”, if this is what we are about and what we consider all others that approach it, we are in complete error. It’s never a matter of a single person being in 100 percent’s, it’s about the ideal we strive for, and some of us are closer to it then others, never judge those not as far along the path, less you get tossed to the back of the line and are taught humility in the process.

If you intentionally hold back sins you invalidate the sacrament. You cannot approach the sacrament with that intention because it adds a mortal sin.

 

[Joan_M]

I didn’t come up with the idea, it’s from a priest talking about this matter on a Catholic radio station, one this place spends a lot of dough advertising upon. Does the confessor get absolution in full, nope, but they get absolution to the few sins they did confess. If someone feels the desire to wade in the water before diving into the deep side, if this makes them feel more comfortable, then it’s far better then not getting in the water at all don’t you think?

**Well, that priest is wrong. You cannot confess a few mortal sins but not others and receive any kind of absolution. It has to be all or nothing. If anyone goes to confession but does not confess one of this mortal sins, he is committing a mortal sin and does not receive absolution (regardless of the fact that the priest, not knowing a sin was withheld, said the words of absolution), but, instead commits another mortal sin. If he then receives Communion, he commits the mortal sin of sacrilege. So, it’s far worse than “not getting in the water at all”. **

The very last thing we as Catholics should ever do to a person, especially someone returning to the church is to become so rigid and unyielding, so strict and overbearing, that to utterly shun anything other then absolute perfection along how they practice their faith, “such as what the pharisees did”, if this is what we are about and what we consider all others that approach it, we are in complete error. It’s never a matter of a single person being in 100 percent’s, it’s about the ideal we strive for, and some of us are closer to it then others, never judge those not as far along the path, less you get tossed to the back of the line and are taught humility in the process.

**All anyone here is trying to do is to get the message across to you and anyone else reading this thread that when it comes to confession and mortal sin it truly is necessary to make a good confession before receiving Holy Communion and that receiving Holy Communion while in a state of mortal sin results in the mortal sin of sacrilege.

To do otherwise is not charitable and may well result in the loss of souls.
**

 

[Joan_M]

Canon 916 is not limited only to priests

It might appear so, however we, the laity, do not celebrate Mass, only the priest does this, and it is stated “Anyone who is conscious of grave sin may not celebrate Mass or receive the Body of the Lord without previously having been to sacramental confession…”. We, the laity, are bound to go to Mass regardless of whether we may receive Communion or not, therefore it is not addressed to us.

And there does not appear to be any occasion that there would be a grave reason while there being no opportunity to confess for a lay person - if there is a priest to celebrate Mass, there is opportunity for a lay person to confess, even if the confession needed to be after Mass as the priest could then give the penitent Communion, if requested.

In face of this, it seems clear that this only applies to a priest (and probably only one who finds himself in an area where (a) he is in a state of mortal sin, (b) there is no other priest within hundreds of miles and (c) he must celebrate Mass for the people of the area he is in.

Perhaps a Canon Lawyer could advise on this.

 

[Maria_Aurea]

I’m not sure what to do in this situation. Here’s the short (although still long) version of the story.

I’ve been helping my best friend with rediscovering the Catholic faith. He was raised Catholic but fell away from the Church after high school. He hasn’t gone to Mass basically for 10+ years, but over the last few months he has been going back. Initially, he wasn’t receiving Communion while at Mass because he wasn’t sure of his belief in the sacrament. I explained that was good since he also needs to go to Confession prior to receiving Communion since it’s been so long since his last Mass (and because of other discussions we’ve had about other choices made).

He asked if I wanted to go to Mass together tonight, so he, my wife, and I went to Mass together, and he received Communion. After Mass, I talked to him about this, and he informed me he still hasn’t gone to Confession. He said he wants to go but hasn’t been able to match up his schedule. I explained the urgency of going before receiving Communion again (and why), but he still said that he’s going to receive Communion regardless because he’s prayed about being sorry and he plans on going to Confession as soon as he can. He also doesn’t want to discuss it any further.

I did tell him to call a local parish because most will set up Confession based on your schedule if needed, but based on our conversation it’s uncertain if he’ll do that or not. So, here’s my question: If he asks me again to go to Mass with me, what should I say? I don’t want to be the reason to send him away from the Church by saying no, but at the same time I also don’t want to help him receive the Eucharist unworthily. Any thoughts?

Thanks for the help!

Dear BusterMartin, I know that it is not easy for a lot of people who have not been to confession for so long to take that next step to go to the confessional. Our faith also teaches us that you have to go to confession as often as you can to be able to receive communion. The sacrament of penance or reconciliation (confession) is one of the thing that separates us from other religion. We cannot say that he is not really contrite when he prays but that does not excuse from making a full confession before receiving communion. Being a catholic he should know this. Have you tried to invite him instead to come with you to go to confession and you can both do it at the same time and talk to your priest and explain the situation and I am sure he will be willing to make the time that will suit your friend that is if this is the only reason why he could not go to confession. This way, he will not be alone on his journey to the confessional because you will be there to support him. Most important, keep praying for him and ask our Blessed Mother to help your friend to fine his way back to his faith fully and in his heart not just in his mind.
I will pray for your friend.

God Bless,
Maria Aurea

 

[rinnie]

I was taught that even if you missed one Sunday, unless of course you are truly sick, or had to work and there was no way possible to get to Church that the next Sunday you had to sit out that Sunday.

Now as far as anything else, I thought that you had to at least confess once a year unless you were in mortal sin:shrug: