Friends Drinking and Driving

[jjb5985]

Luckily, most of the people I know who drink are careful to make sure they don’t drive if they’ve had too much. Nevertheless, I still find myself in situations where friends of mine want to drive after they’ve had a questionable amount of alcohol. If they are absolutely in no condition to drive, I will usually manage to talk them out of it.

The problem is when it is hard to tell whether are able to drive or not and/or they won’t accept your offer to drive them. Want can one do in these situations?

I usually follow them to make sure they’re ok, but even still that doesn’t do anything if they actually did have too much and they get in an accident. Any advice for situations like this? I absolutely hate drunk/slightly intoxicated driving, but I feel somewhat helpless sometimes. I don’t drink and I always offer to drive those in need, but somtimes they don’t listen. You can’t really rationalize with people who have been drinking.

 

[paramedicgirl]

With all the education that schools provide these days about drunk driving, I have really noticed a decline in the number of intoxicated teenagers behind the wheel.

Designated Drivers are very common where I live. Teenagers are always saying they are the DD for the night. You need to look out for yourselves in that regard. Appoint a DD for every party.

Never get into a car with someone who has been drinking. Parents should never mind a phone call at 2 AM to come and pick up their teenager who may not be in any shape to drive. It’s a lot better than having a cop come to your door to give you some very bad news that you will have to identify a body in the morgue.

Don’t be afraid to take car keys away from your friends if they have been drinking. Have them place their keys in your hands the minute they take their first drink.

I’ve pulled a lot of drunk drivers out of their vehicles, but thankfully, for the most part, they have not been teenagers. Incredibly, many of them have been semi truck drivers.

 

[Jay2]

Well, you can argue with them, and try and take their keys away… with the usual result… “NO GDMAMMIT, IM OK - I DRIVVVEE BETTER AFFTER A FEW ANYWAYZZZZ”.

OR:

Well, you can argue with them, and try and take their keys away… with the usual result… “NO GDMAMMIT, IM OK - I DRIVVVEE BETTER AFFTER A FEW ANYWAYZZZZ”… and agree with them. Then offer to get them “One more for the ditch… hah hah” and excuse yourself. Sneak outside and jam a toothpick into the valve of TWO of their car’s tires, and let the air out… then come back in and give them the next drink.

Chemistry doesn’t lie. An average man or woman in good physical condition is legally impaired (.08 BAC) after having two drinks within 60 minutes time.

It doesn’t matter if it was wine, hard-stuff, or beer…OR if you ate 3 loaves of bread and 1/2 a steer, sucked on two penny’s and a box of TicTacs…two drinks within an hour and you are toasted - cuffed in the plastic barf-seat in the back of the squad - or on a gurney in the Ambulance… or the Coroner’s wagon… Have your Medical Plan Card, lawyer’s or funeral home’s number in your wallet please…

The $35 for a cab home, and calling in a “marker” from a buddy to retrieve your car from the party house the morning after is cheap compared to the cost of a “Dewey” or killing someone else (the drunk never dies in an accident).

(From someone who has Cop, EMT, and County Prosecutor friends…)

 

[paramedicgirl]

Well, you can argue with them, and try and take their keys away… with the usual result… “NO GDMAMMIT, IM OK - I DRIVVVEE BETTER AFFTER A FEW ANYWAYZZZZ”.

OR:

Well, you can argue with them, and try and take their keys away… with the usual result… “NO GDMAMMIT, IM OK - I DRIVVVEE BETTER AFFTER A FEW ANYWAYZZZZ”… and agree with them. Then offer to get them “One more for the ditch… hah hah” and excuse yourself. Sneak outside and jam a toothpick into the valve of TWO of their car’s tires, and let the air out… then come back in and give them the next drink.

Chemistry doesn’t lie. An average man or woman in good physical condition is legally impaired (.08 BAC) after having two drinks within 60 minutes time.

It doesn’t matter if it was wine, hard-stuff, or beer…OR if you ate 3 loaves of bread and 1/2 a steer, sucked on two penny’s and a box of TicTacs…two drinks within an hour and you are toasted - cuffed in the plastic barf-seat in the back of the squad - or on a gurney in the Ambulance… or the Coroner’s wagon… Have your Medical Plan Card, lawyer’s or funeral home’s number in your wallet please…

The $35 for a cab home, and calling in a “marker” from a buddy to retrieve your car from the party house the morning after is cheap compared to the cost of a “Dewey” or killing someone else (the drunk never dies in an accident).

(From someone who has Cop, EMT, and County Prosecutor friends…)

Actually, sometimes the drunk driver does die in the accident he causes, that killed the two hitch hikers he picked up and paralyzed the front seat passenger who was his best friend. All because he was speeding, passing on double solids, passing around corners, and driving on the right hand side of the road in a drunken stupor to never get to his destination alive. All this right before he wraps his car around an oncoming semi that he can’t avoid because he has no motor control and no reaction time.

 

[Jay2]

I stand corrected… under most circumstances the drunk “usually” doesn’t die… the “innocents” however almost always do.

 

[jjb5985]

With all the education that schools provide these days about drunk driving, I have really noticed a decline in the number of intoxicated teenagers behind the wheel.

Designated Drivers are very common where I live. Teenagers are always saying they are the DD for the night. You need to look out for yourselves in that regard. Appoint a DD for every party.

Never get into a car with someone who has been drinking. Parents should never mind a phone call at 2 AM to come and pick up their teenager who may not be in any shape to drive. It’s a lot better than having a cop come to your door to give you some very bad news that you will have to identify a body in the morgue.

Don’t be afraid to take car keys away from your friends if they have been drinking. Have them place their keys in your hands the minute they take their first drink.

I’ve pulled a lot of drunk drivers out of their vehicles, but thankfully, for the most part, they have not been teenagers. Incredibly, many of them have been semi truck drivers.

Yeah, most people I know are pretty good. The problem with the key thing is that I don’t realize they are drinking or have had too much to drink until its too late before I can ask for their keys. I always offer to drive, but sometimes they want their car and so they don’t take the offer. After thinking about it some more , I think I just need to be more proactive and forceful in telling them they aren’t going to drive rather than asking them not to drive.

I’m college age, so its hard to avoid being around people who are over 21 and are going to drink. I feel like all the responsibility falls on me to take care of everyone and I wish people could just be responsible. What person would want to risk killing themselves or others?

 

[puzzleannie]

Designated Drivers are very common where I live. Teenagers are always saying they are the DD for the night. You need to look out for yourselves in that regard. Appoint a DD for every party.
.

teen son of my old boss left a party with a DD, in a car full of other drunken teenagers. The DD was not intoxicated, but she was a college student with a suspended license and 5 prior drunk driving arrests. She ran the car off a road down into a drainage ditch. cops found all 4 dead bodies, but missed the son who lay in the ditch until morning. He is alive, permanently paralyzed from the neck down. That was 12 years ago.

to say that DDs solve the problem of teen drinking is like saying passing out needles solves the problem of drug addiction.

oh, yes, the driver walked away from the accident, spent a few weeks in jail, and is not doubt tootling down a highway somewhere even as we speak

 

[Lorik]

I stand corrected… under most circumstances the drunk “usually” doesn’t die… the “innocents” however almost always do.

Yes, you’re right. The doctor involved in treating a friend’s sister after an accident said that they most often come out OK b/c they don’t brace themselves for the impact like sober people do. It actually works against you to do so.

 

[CRW]

Luckily, most of the people I know who drink are careful to make sure they don’t drive if they’ve had too much. Nevertheless, I still find myself in situations where friends of mine want to drive after they’ve had a questionable amount of alcohol. If they are absolutely in no condition to drive, I will usually manage to talk them out of it.

The problem is when it is hard to tell whether are able to drive or not and/or they won’t accept your offer to drive them. Want can one do in these situations?

I usually follow them to make sure they’re ok, but even still that doesn’t do anything if they actually did have too much and they get in an accident. Any advice for situations like this? I absolutely hate drunk/slightly intoxicated driving, but I feel somewhat helpless sometimes. I don’t drink and I always offer to drive those in need, but somtimes they don’t listen. You can’t really rationalize with people who have been drinking.

Try to avoid the locations where drinking is the norm. If it is your house, then you are responsible for cutting off those before they become intoxicated. If they truely are your friends, when the situation occurs that you cannot control, discuss this with them the next day and tell them bluntly that you will not tolerate their behavior again. Let them decide which is most important; their drinking or your friendship.

 

[rpp]

I usually follow them to make sure they’re ok, but even still that doesn’t do anything if they actually did have too much and they get in an accident. Any advice for situations like this? I absolutely hate drunk/slightly intoxicated driving, but I feel somewhat helpless sometimes. I don’t drink and I always offer to drive those in need, but somtimes they don’t listen. You can’t really rationalize with people who have been drinking.

Why follow them? Is it because you want to be the first one to call the paramedics aftrer they kill a pedestrian or have a head-on collision with a family? Or is it that you want to flag them down afterwards and tell them what they did?

Following them does absolutely no good, except perhaps to fool yourself into thinking you have somehow prevented a tragedy.

As I see it, the moral choices are fairly straight-forward. Stop them from driving yourself using whatever means are appropriate, including coersion or paying for the taxi out of your own pocket. Failing that, you must call the police and have your friends deal with the law. With God’s grace, your friends will not have killed or injured anyone before the police can stop them.

Previous posters had many good suggestions for how to convince someone to not drive. While I cannot add anything to their suggestions, I can only say that if you let someone drive away beleiveing them to be intoxicated, you bear the moral, and possibly legal, responsibility for their actions.

Of course, you can always do what I do, not hang around people who over-indulge.

 

[paramedicgirl]

teen son of my old boss left a party with a DD, in a car full of other drunken teenagers. The DD was not intoxicated, but she was a college student with a suspended license and 5 prior drunk driving arrests. She ran the car off a road down into a drainage ditch. cops found all 4 dead bodies, but missed the son who lay in the ditch until morning. He is alive, permanently paralyzed from the neck down. That was 12 years ago.

to say that DDs solve the problem of teen drinking is like saying passing out needles solves the problem of drug addiction.

oh, yes, the driver walked away from the accident, spent a few weeks in jail, and is not doubt tootling down a highway somewhere even as we speak

Annie, if you are saying that designated drivers are of no use, then you are sadly mistaken. What happened in the story you relate is a very unfortunate incident, indeed. But designated drivers are by and large responsible youth who take their role very seriously. They should not be compared to drug addicts who are looking for a clean needle.

 

[jjb5985]

Why follow them? Is it because you want to be the first one to call the paramedics aftrer they kill a pedestrian or have a head-on collision with a family? Or is it that you want to flag them down afterwards and tell them what they did?

Following them does absolutely no good, except perhaps to fool yourself into thinking you have somehow prevented a tragedy.

As I see it, the moral choices are fairly straight-forward. Stop them from driving yourself using whatever means are appropriate, including coersion or paying for the taxi out of your own pocket. Failing that, you must call the police and have your friends deal with the law. With God’s grace, your friends will not have killed or injured anyone before the police can stop them.

Previous posters had many good suggestions for how to convince someone to not drive. While I cannot add anything to their suggestions, I can only say that if you let someone drive away beleiveing them to be intoxicated, you bear the moral, and possibly legal, responsibility for their actions.

Of course, you can always do what I do, not hang around people who over-indulge.

Yeah, I never understood the purpose of following someone who is clearly in no condition to drive as that does nothing to stop an accident. I’m talking more about situations where I’m not sure whether they are ok to drive or not and I can follow to see they are swerving around the road and what not. Then I can try to stop them if I see they are not ok to drive. Which by no means is a great strategy hence me asking for advice.

The problem with not hanging around people who over indulge is that it usually isn’t a problem. Its just one of those things that every now and then, you find yourself in that odd situation that you couldn’t foresee. The more I’ve thought about it, the more I’ve realized I need to have zero tolerance and do whatever it takes to stop them. Luckily for me, most people I know are good about not drinking and driving.

Although this isn’t something I’ve had to deal with, what would be the responsibile thing to do if you see someone who’s been drinking start to drive and you don’t even know the person. Like you just randomly see a drunk person leave a bar and get into their car to drive. What would be the prudent way to handle that? It seems like if you call the cops there would be no way for the cops to stop the person before they can already take off somewhere.

 

[Sabda]

If you know they have been drinking and got behind the wheel call the police. If you are aware of someone drinking and that person kills someone it is possible for you to be held liable. I know they are becoming very tough on bartenders because of this very thing. It’s far better for them to sober up in jail then to let them kill someone while they are driving drunk.

We can dial *55 out here to get the highway patrol. I’m sure you have something similar. Call your local highway patrol to find out. If you get a good id of the car and tell the police what direction that person went they can pretty much take it from there. If you can follow them that would make it even easier for the police to find them. When it comes to drunks I would let the police handle it. Especially if you don’t know the person.

 

[jjb5985]

If you know they have been drinking and got behind the wheel call the police. If you are aware of someone drinking and that person kills someone it is possible for you to be held liable. I know they are becoming very tough on bartenders because of this very thing. It’s far better for them to sober up in jail then to let them kill someone while they are driving drunk.

We can dial *55 out here to get the highway patrol. I’m sure you have something similar. Call your local highway patrol to find out. If you get a good id of the car and tell the police what direction that person went they can pretty much take it from there. If you can follow them that would make it even easier for the police to find them. When it comes to drunks I would let the police handle it. Especially if you don’t know the person.

This is exactly what I needed to know. Thanks for the help.

 

[puzzleannie]

. But designated drivers are by and large responsible youth who take their role very seriously. .

underage youth who take responsibility very seriously would not be at a party where drinking is the primary recreation in any case. you all seem to be missing the point, which is recreational drinking among teens, an epidemic that is the cause of the symptom: drunk driving.

 

[puzzleannie]

Try to avoid the locations where drinking is the norm. If it is your house, then you are responsible for cutting off those before they become intoxicated. If .

if this is your house and you let your guests leave intoxicated you may be liable if they cause an accident, and if those guests are underage you may be facing criminal prosecution–better check your state laws quick.

 

[rpp]

Yeah, I never understood the purpose of following someone who is clearly in no condition to drive as that does nothing to stop an accident. I’m talking more about situations where I’m not sure whether they are ok to drive or not and I can follow to see they are swerving around the road and what not. Then I can try to stop them if I see they are not ok to drive. Which by no means is a great strategy hence me asking for advice.

The problem with not hanging around people who over indulge is that it usually isn’t a problem. Its just one of those things that every now and then, you find yourself in that odd situation that you couldn’t foresee. The more I’ve thought about it, the more I’ve realized I need to have zero tolerance and do whatever it takes to stop them. Luckily for me, most people I know are good about not drinking and driving.

Although this isn’t something I’ve had to deal with, what would be the responsibile thing to do if you see someone who’s been drinking start to drive and you don’t even know the person. Like you just randomly see a drunk person leave a bar and get into their car to drive. What would be the prudent way to handle that? It seems like if you call the cops there would be no way for the cops to stop the person before they can already take off somewhere.

Okay , I inderstand where you are coming from.

As for the last question, There are stories where some people have followed impaired drivers while talking to the police on a cell phone.

While I think following a stranger can be dangerous and would not recommend it, calling the police with a license plate, description of the driver if you can get it and point of departure and direction would be very helpful. I myself have actually done this.

Even if you do not know the person, consider apporaching them in a friendly open manner. You may make a joke about them staggaring around and ask them if they plan to drive. Most people what to do the right thing and the person may not realize they have over-indulged. The (name removed by moderator)ortant point here is be friendly but not intrusive. Use good sense here; it is probably not a good idea to walk up to a biker gang and start telling them they are too drunk to drive! :tsktsk:

It is a difficult problem and this is as much about human relations as it is about morality. As I have never been very good in the human relations department, I generally do what I can to avoid many types of situations., including this one.

 

[paramedicgirl]

underage youth who take responsibility very seriously would not be at a party where drinking is the primary recreation in any case. you all seem to be missing the point, which is recreational drinking among teens, an epidemic that is the cause of the symptom: drunk driving.

Who’s talking about underage youth? I guess we have different legal ages here than you do. In Alberta, which is right next door to me, the legal age is 18. In BC, where I live it’s 19. That is why I refer to them as teenagers. The government has deemed them old enough to vote, and old enough to drink.

And I know some very responsible and good youth. I am very pleased at how they won’t get behind the wheel of a car when they have been drinking. Like I said, the schools are providing much better education these days about drinking and driving that they did when I was in high school.

 

[Sabda]

In the US the voting age is 18. The drinking age is 21. A large number of college kids would not be able to drink.

 

[jjb5985]

In the US the voting age is 18. The drinking age is 21. A large number of college kids would not be able to drink.

I’m not sure what this is referring to, if this has to do with me saying I’m college age, I mean that many if not most of my friends are 21 or over. I’ll be 21 by the end of the month.