Frustrated College Student - Any Advice?

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lovedance4ever

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Hello everyone. I am an eighteen year old girl, and am actually a sophomore in college. It may sound strange, but I was homeschooled, combined two years of high school into one, and was able to graduate when I was 16 (in the summer of 2010).

My long road of colleges/majors is complicated, but I will make it as brief as possible for these forums. I began attending a college in the fall of 2010, but soon after took a leave of absence, after my mother was diagnosed with breast cancer (off of chemo and cancer free now, PRAISE GOD!!), and I decided that I wanted to stay home and help care for her. This was a good decision, as it turned out, because I believe I grew up quite a lot in those first few months.

In the spring of 2011, I finally attended a different college, decided that I did not want to go into English (which was my previous major), but rather, criminal justice instead. This first semester was amazing; I received a 4.0, and then was able to maintain that in the summer when I took 3 classes. In the fall of 2011, however, I was less enthusiastic about criminal justice, and that was mostly because I did not think I could ever stand a career where I had to wake up in the morning and see so much of the evil that is in the world. Also, I have many physical disabilities (ie a herniated disc in my neck, and fibromyalgia), and I am not sure if I would even be able to do the work that is required of a police officer (which is what I wanted to do). I then decided to change my major to digital media and communications, another interest I thought I had. After taking a few classes, though, I realized that it was not for me AT ALL, and so I dropped it. Again without a major, and no idea what I wanted to do, I then began to brain storm and thought of another interest I had.

My father has been very ill on and off over the past few years, and I really admired the nurses who helped to care for him. So I thought that I would give that a shot. It was something in which I had always had interest, but never thought I was capable of learning that amount of material. Looking at my 4.0 and study habits, I thought I would give it a shot.

I transferred yet AGAIN (I must sound crazy by now) to a college which is fairly well known for its nursing program, but after a few weeks in class, the material was so hard and I did so poorly on the quizzes and tests that I was advised by my academic counselor to drop the classes. Now, I like a good challenge, but the teacher was impossible to understand, and would not be truthful about the material we were going to be tested on. The average on his quizzes was 40.

So now I have lost interest in nursing (though not completely). I am at a complete loss as to what I should do. I still have a special place in my heart for criminal justice, but know I would never be physically capable of that job. After seeing the nursing material and learning it, I am not all that “passioninate” or interested in it (and it has absolutely nothing about the level of difficulty), and yet I still want to help people who are in need of medical assistance.

And most of all, the thing I was most passionate about, I can no longer do. I was a dancer for eleven years and planned on majoring in dance. However, a very serious neck injury which triggered my fibromyalgia abruptly stopped me from pursuing my dream. So basically anything that I compare to dance (even though I know I shouldn’t) just does not seem to measure up. It is always in the back of my mind.

History is my second passion, but I never pursued that because I was told that there are absolutely no careers in that field, which discouraged me quite a bit. Now, however, I am planning on going to another school (I know…it’s insane) which has an amazing history department, which I think I will do quite well in.

Basically, I need prayers most of all as I move on and need to make a decision, but advice as to what I should do - any advice at all - would be greatly appreciated. I feel so stuck, and like I will go onto history only to discover that I do not like that field, either. Please pray that I can get over my past as a dancer. It probably sounds silly, but it feels as though someone has died…or like I lost a part of myself. I still cry quite often about it, and I just cannot seem to let go. Thank you in advance and God bless.
 
You’re not alone in this experience. At your age, it is difficult to decide what you want to do, and that’s okay. Explore whatever interests you. If you want to try history, try history. If you want to go back to criminal justice, do that. Heck, do a dual major! Most people work outside of their majors anyway. I began as a chemistry major and changed to philosophy, and so I ended up with a minor in chemistry with an organic and biochemistry concentration. I also took a detour as an army medic. I’m now pursuing an MBA. I currently work for an insurance company, which is pretty far removed from pursuing the answers to philosophical questions.

You would be surprised about the variety of work you can do with a criminal justice degree. You can work in a law office as a researcher or paralegal. You can work for an insurance company as an investigator (many of my company’s investigators have a criminal justice degree.). You could work in adult or youth corrections, or doing clerical work for a law enforcement agency.

At your age, you should pursue what interests you and see where it leads. Be open to where God might be taking you, and trust in Him to provide for your needs. I never thought I’d be working in insurance, but my major, minor, and medic experience turned out to be a perfect fit for the work I do. A highly improbable chain of events led to my current employment, and so I tend to see the hand of God in it.

Right now you’re looking for what the destination will be. That’s not unreasonable, but sometimes the journey itself is just as important, so enjoy the journey and don’t become anxious about how it will all play out. The only thing you can count on is that it won’t play out the way you thought it would. When you have decades of experiences to look back on you’ll see that’s not necessarily a bad thing. It can be quite good.
 
You are young and this takes time – choosing a major.

What is it about criminal justice that you feel you cannot do? You can become a paralegal. You can go to law school. You can work in probation. You can work with non-profits such that deal with settling released prisoners back into real life. You can work in government such as the D.A.'s office or the U.S. Attorney’s office. You can work for the court system – some require tests.

There’s plenty of things that you can do with a criminal justice degree. Criminal justice does not necessarily lead to a career as a police officer. In fact, the opposite. Most who start out in criminal justice go on to other fields. Police officers who are already officers then take criminal justice courses.

I have worked in criminal law as a paralegal for about 20 years. The worst thing about working with them is that the clients can be manipulative. I mainly do research, field calls for my boss, go to court when his appearance is not required, appear at calendar calls (which are nothing but presenting papers), prepare subpoenas for judges to sign (and serve them), prepare affidavits and affirmations, see the clerks at court, dig through old files, find witnesses, prisoners and related cases – and anything a client asks me to do that I cannot or should not do, or even if I can, I tell them I cannot do it without my bosses knowledge or permission. I even have them convinced that it would be so much better that I don’t contact the U.S. Attorney or the D.A. for them because my boss is so much better at working the system that they REALLY want my boss to do it.
 
Because I’m almost a college student, I can’t offer some detailed advice. But I’m in the same boat and I’m just starting to claw my way back up (after having started off so well in college and with my own major planned out before things happened). Like other have said, be open to what God has in store for you even though the journey is long and there doesn’t seem to be a clear path.For me, I’m just focusing on one thing and I’m not entirely sure if it’s something I want to do for the rest of my life (but that’s can’t be known until you’ve had the actual job itself) but I’m sticking to it nevertheless. And I’m also praying really hard to God that I’m going down the right path.

The way you talked about dance reminds me how I feel about art, which I can’t professionally pursue at this point in my life. I got upset over it for but things got better.

I’ll be praying for you!
 
Hi lovedance4ever,

Welcome to CAF. I understand how you feel about not knowing what to major in.

When I was a senior in high school, I had not idea what I wanted to major in, what to do with my life. I was very happy to have gotten into the prestigious universities here in our country. I just randomly chose a major, like computer science, since it was popular, business majors, since it was practical.

I’m not like some people who, from the time they were very young, already knew what they wanted to do in their life. In your case, you did know, which is dancing.

I have a lot of things that I want to do, but I don’t know/think if they can be jobs or careers, you know what I mean?

Anyhow, I’ll be praying for you and wishing you all the best. Praying that you will find out what you want to do in your life and do God’s will.
 
How do you feel about learning a trade first, and then going back to college to earn a degree in something that doesn’t necessarily lead to a job?

I realize that you probably won’t be able to do physical work like welding. Too bad, because there is a huge shortage of welders, and companies are offering to pay people to go to trade school and earn their welding certificate.

One trade that comes to mind is technical writing. I have heard that there is a need for more technical writers. I’m not sure if that information is still current, but it’s worth looking into.

If I were you, I would talk to a jobs counselor about various trades, and try to find one that you can do even with physical limitations. That way, you can at least make a living. You know, even though our culture indoctrinates us with the idea that we have to LOVE our career, you really don’t have to love it. You just have to be able to pay bills with it. You can do a job that you don’t love, and then when you are off work, do lots of things that you love with the money that you earn in your job.
 
Never major in dance. It’s a complete waste of money.

If you are that passionate about it…your best bet would be to just take classes, build up some networking skills and start shopping around for a company you can begin to grow in and start working your way up. However, if you are injured then dance may not be a wise choice.

I was a dancer as well and was quite good. I was still in high school when I began auditioning for different companies. I was asked to join two different ones. I decided to go to college and major in dance instead. It was a massive mistake because I wasn’t learning anything new or different, I ended up injured with no transferable credits and a ton of debt that I had no way of paying for.

I decided to stop college completely and I earned my EMT-Basic certificate and started working full time. I was 20, with a full time job that paid decently and had benefits. Now I’m back at school and working on my nursing degree.

My sister majored in Criminal Justice and she currently manages a large store at a mall. You don’t have to be a cop. You can do anything in the field such as paralegal, parol officer, security or you can do something totally different.

Being so young and being expected to make a decision on what you are going to do for the rest of your life is a huge burden to bear. It was incredibly difficult for me because I spent my entire life, up until that point, planning to dance and teach classes. It was my only interest and when that failed I didn’t know what to do. I grew incredible depressed and felt like I had failed at the one thing I enjoyed and was truly good at.

That isn’t true of course. I moved on and tried a different approach that worked for me. Now, I’ve finally started and will finish my degree. I’m also 28.

Maybe you need to take a break from school and do something different.
 
Another possibility–look into the field of medical technology, which is also called clinical laboratory science.

This is what I do for a living, and I like it, and it pays fairly well.

It’s a four-year degree. Lots of science, but you don’t have to pull 4.0s to be a CLS.

You do three years of school, and then you do several months of clinicals in the hospital lab.

There is already a huge shortage in this field. But within the next five years, the shortage will become critical, as over half of the medical technologists currently working will reach retirement age. There aren’t any replacements, or more accurately, there are not enough replacements.

It’s kind of scary, especially with the advent of the President’s health care plan. If this health care plan passes, there won’t be enough medical technologists to do all the extra testing that will happen. No matter how much the President wants something, he can’t make a few med techs do the work that requires thousands of med techs. Won’t happen.

Med techs work in a lab doing lab tests on patients. There are several areas of the lab that you will have to learn: Hematology (blood counts, bleeding and clotting tests, etc.), Chemistry (glucose, cholesterol, drug screens, heart enzymes, etc.), Blood Bank (tranfusion of blood and other units, etc.), and Microbiology (culturing microorganisms, antibiotic susceptibility testing, etc.)

The tests I listed above are just a few examples of what is done in each department. There are literally thousands of laboratory tests, and a med tech learns how to do them all. (Much of it is done on machines nowadays, although in microbiology, we still use petri plates and agar, and streak out the bacteria with loops.)

Physically the work is not particularly demanding. Much of it is done seated, and ADA requires that labs comply with reasonable demands (e.g., allowing a tech to sit down while doing the work).

You will probably end up working 3rd shift or 2nd shift for a few years.

You don’t have a lot of interaction with patients, and most of us like that. We get the patient specimens, and we know that we are performing a vital service that will save many lives, and help many people get well. We work hard to remember that the specimens are from real people with real lives.

I hope you will consider this option.
 
There are other possibilities in the medical field as well.

Ultrasound Tech, Lab Tech, Med Tech, Phlebotomy.

It may be something to look into. Some of these you need a degree and others you go through a tech program. These jobs are less physically demanding as well.
 
I would recommend a visit with a career counselor. That person can help you think about other job descriptions that fall within your interest areas. There may be a general career counselor at your current school. If not, you can find one outside of your college. Community colleges used to have that type of counselor, not sure if they still do.

If you are interested in criminal justice, there are hundreds of different jobs you could do, and do well. The street cop is just one that might be tough for you, but there are many other jobs where you could have an impact on society.

The dance interest…Well, there are jobs within that industry as well, but if you will always be wistfully looking at the dancers and thinking, “If only…” then I wouldn’t do it. And any job in the arts is probably not going to pay as well as in another field, just be aware of it.

Here is a book that also might help you narrow down your interests. I think you are the type of person who can succeed in several different fields and it’s hard to limit yourself. You are still also very young. Starting college at 16 may not be the optimal time.

48 Days

The title of the book goes along with the current belief that one must LOVE the work one does…I don’t agree entirely with that. I think any work can be honorable to God, and many of us shouldn’t expect to LOVE every day of the job we are in. The expectation is that every job we have will fulfill our deepest desires, rather like we are told that our husbands or wives will be the loves of our lives romantically forever. Take it with a grain of salt. I think if any career has enough elements of interest as well as a good chance to support a modest lifestyle, it’s good enough. Some of us are not highly ambitious, either, which means we will not be the CEOs and entrepreneurs, but do the work to keep society going.

Just a few random thoughts to consider.
 
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