Funeral liturgy procedures

[Kielbasi]

I haven’t attended a whole lot of funerals in recent years, and most have omitted the ride to the cemetery. Most folks prefer to rent a casket and then just bury cremains later it seems.

But I attended a funeral which included a drive to the graveyard a couple of weeks ago- in the Greensburg PA diocese if that makes a diff- and the protocol has changed.

The weather was fair, but they didn’t bring the casket to the grave site. Instead they just brought it to a chapel on the cemetery ground, said a few short prayers and it was over.

It seems to me to be a whole lot different than in the not so distant past.

When did these changes occur, and why?

 

[Tarpeian_Rock]

I haven’t attended a whole lot of funerals in recent years, and most have omitted the ride to the cemetery. Most folks prefer to rent a casket and then just bury cremains later it seems.

But I attended a funeral which included a drive to the graveyard a couple of weeks ago- in the Greensburg PA diocese if that makes a diff- and the protocol has changed.

The weather was fair, but they didn’t bring the casket to the grave site. Instead they just brought it to a chapel on the cemetery ground, said a few short prayers and it was over.

It seems to me to be a whole lot different than in the not so distant past.

When did these changes occur, and why?

I would think this had something personal to do with the individual, family, or cemetery situation. The Rite of Committal at the gravesite is clearly still a part of the funeral liturgies, and the last few funerals I have attended have all concluded at the grave, so I don’t think it’s a matter of “these changes.”

Some ideas: Might the individual have donated their body to science, but for the sake of the family wanted a service to conclude at the cemetery? Alternatively, my Godmother’s funeral concluded at the cemetery, but the casket was not buried because she was cremated as there was no room for a full burial in the family plot, and the family chose to keep the cremation private and wanted a cemetery service for the family, with burial of the askes later. So perhaps there was a special situation like these. Just a thought.

 

[zab]

I haven’t attended a whole lot of funerals in recent years, and most have omitted the ride to the cemetery. Most folks prefer to rent a casket and then just bury cremains later it seems.

But I attended a funeral which included a drive to the graveyard a couple of weeks ago- in the Greensburg PA diocese if that makes a diff- and the protocol has changed.

The weather was fair, but they didn’t bring the casket to the grave site. Instead they just brought it to a chapel on the cemetery ground, said a few short prayers and it was over.

It seems to me to be a whole lot different than in the not so distant past.

When did these changes occur, and why?

I don’t know if it is accurate to say that “most” folks prefer to have a cremation, but there are an increasing number that do. I attended a funeral similar to what you described and the deceased was being cremated. That is why his casket was driven to the place where the urns are deposited rather than to the grave site.
I have been to many funerals over the years. Some welcome people to drive to the grave site. Others either do not want to impose upon people to go along especially when the weather is not so good, or they would rather have a private gravesite service. Of those that do invite people to the gravesite, some have police escorts but most do not. It is an added expense. One thing that I have noticed is that there is more respect shown in some parts of the country than others when it comes to funeral processions to the gravesite. Where we live, there is little to no respect shown for such processions. Some drivers get irritated even with police allow the procession to go through red lights. Some blast their horns because they have to wait for the cars to go. It was a different story when I attended my mother-in-law’s funeral in St.Charles, Mo about 5 years ago. It was a very long procession of cars, but many cars would pull over to let the procession pass! And we didn’t have a police escort! It has been a long time since I have seen such respect shown for a funeral procession to the gravesite.

 

[twopekinguys]

My parents are buried at a National Cemetery (Military) in Florida, namely, Florida National Cemetery.

At that particular cemetery, there are what is called “committal shelters”. The cemetery portion of the services are held there, and the casket is then placed in the appropriate grave, after the funeral party has left.

It is also interesting to note, that at this cemetery, there are so many burials , and entombment of ashes, on any given day that each service is slotted a 30 minute window to perform their funeral rites.

 

[Phemie]

In the parish where I live, there is always a graveside ceremony unless the cremated remains are being buried or entombed elsewhere.

In the parish where I grew up and where I buried my mom & dad, the cemetery is right behind the church yet there is never a graveside ceremony that involves the family. The priest does all the ‘prayers at the graveside’ in the church and nobody walks the 200 feet to the cemetery. I don’t get that since throwing that handful of dirt on the casket is such a final goodbye and so important in the grieving process.

 

[George_Stegmeir]

I live in New York, my younger brother in South Florida. When he died in 2002. He never married and had no one except myself to see to his burial. He died right before the Jewish Holidays of Rosh Hoshana and Yom Kippur…so I couldn’t get a death certificate obtain his body or to get him interred. I could not stay in Florida for six days.
He had indicated to his friends that he wished to be cremated, so I was able to make arrangements with the Neptune Society in Florida.
I was able to make arrangements for his funeral Mass and services with the Pastor of our family parish church and it was done with out his body being present in the Church, and of course there was no trip to the Cemetary. I made arrangements for the burial of his cremains in our family plot next to our parents in a Catholic cemetary. Since I couldn’t be there for his interment, the Neptune Society delivered the urn with his cremains and the cemetary took care of everything. To the best of my knowledge, there was no Priest or ceremony at the burial…Such is modern life I guess.

 

[TimothyH]

I live in New York, my younger brother in South Florida. When he died in 2002. He never married and had no one except myself to see to his burial. He died right before the Jewish Holidays of Rosh Hoshana and Yom Kippur…so I couldn’t get a death certificate obtain his body or to get him interred. I could not stay in Florida for six days.
He had indicated to his friends that he wished to be cremated, so I was able to make arrangements with the Neptune Society in Florida.
I was able to make arrangements for his funeral Mass and services with the Pastor of our family parish church and it was done with out his body being present in the Church, and of course there was no trip to the Cemetary. I made arrangements for the burial of his cremains in our family plot next to our parents in a Catholic cemetary. Since I couldn’t be there for his interment, the Neptune Society delivered the urn with his cremains and the cemetary took care of everything. To the best of my knowledge, there was no Priest or ceremony at the burial…Such is modern life I guess.

Yet you can be sure that a holy man of God offered prayers for your brother’s soul at the Holy Sacrifice of the Mass. What’s better than that? I hope I get that much when I die.

It must have been tough to have to leave. Getting on that plane must have been tough.

This is why I serve as a member of my parish’s Arimathean Minstry. We are adults who altar serve for funerals. When few care to be there, or when they physically can’t be present, we show up, we serve, and we pray. Though I work a regular job, I serve when I can.

-Tim-

 

[Hboggs]

I live in New York, my younger brother in South Florida. When he died in 2002. He never married and had no one except myself to see to his burial. He died right before the Jewish Holidays of Rosh Hoshana and Yom Kippur…so I couldn’t get a death certificate obtain his body or to get him interred. I could not stay in Florida for six days.
He had indicated to his friends that he wished to be cremated, so I was able to make arrangements with the Neptune Society in Florida.
I was able to make arrangements for his funeral Mass and services with the Pastor of our family parish church and it was done with out his body being present in the Church, and of course there was no trip to the Cemetary. I made arrangements for the burial of his cremains in our family plot next to our parents in a Catholic cemetary. Since I couldn’t be there for his interment, the Neptune Society delivered the urn with his cremains and the cemetary took care of everything. To the best of my knowledge, there was no Priest or ceremony at the burial…Such is modern life I guess.

**Pardon my ignorance, but what does the Jewish Holidays have to do with obtaining a death certificate? Thank you. **

 

[Hboggs]

I don’t know if it is accurate to say that “most” folks prefer to have a cremation, but there are an increasing number that do. I attended a funeral similar to what you described and the deceased was being cremated. That is why his casket was driven to the place where the urns are deposited rather than to the grave site.
I have been to many funerals over the years. Some welcome people to drive to the grave site. Others either do not want to impose upon people to go along especially when the weather is not so good, or they would rather have a private gravesite service. Of those that do invite people to the gravesite, some have police escorts but most do not. It is an added expense. One thing that I have noticed is that there is more respect shown in some parts of the country than others when it comes to funeral processions to the gravesite. Where we live, there is little to no respect shown for such processions. Some drivers get irritated even with police allow the procession to go through red lights. Some blast their horns because they have to wait for the cars to go. It was a different story when I attended my mother-in-law’s funeral in St.Charles, Mo about 5 years ago. It was a very long procession of cars, but many cars would pull over to let the procession pass! And we didn’t have a police escort! It has been a long time since I have seen such respect shown for a funeral procession to the gravesite.

**I’m glad to say that where I live (Georgia), people will pull over to the side of the road until the hearse and at least the family vehicles have passed. There is usually a police/sheriff escort and I’ve never known of a charge for this service. **

 

[ciero]

**Pardon my ignorance, but what does the Jewish Holidays have to do with obtaining a death certificate? Thank you. **

Most businesses and government in FL shut down for the Jewish holidays.

 

[George_Stegmeir]

**Pardon my ignorance, but what does the Jewish Holidays have to do with obtaining a death certificate? Thank you. **

In Dade County, Fla. if you died and your remains were sent to the public morgue and was held there until the coroner signed the Death Certificate. In 2001 and 2002, all of the coroners in Dade County were Jewish, and didn’t work over the Jewish Hollidays.
A similiar situation with the morgue also exists in New York City.

 

[Jim_Roberts]

I haven’t attended a whole lot of funerals in recent years, and most have omitted the ride to the cemetery. Most folks prefer to rent a casket and then just bury cremains later it seems.

But I attended a funeral which included a drive to the graveyard a couple of weeks ago- in the Greensburg PA diocese if that makes a diff- and the protocol has changed.

The weather was fair, but they didn’t bring the casket to the grave site. Instead they just brought it to a chapel on the cemetery ground, said a few short prayers and it was over.

It seems to me to be a whole lot different than in the not so distant past.

When did these changes occur, and why?

=========================================================
IT IS LIKE ANY OTHER FUNERAL, NOTHING HAS CHANGED AND HAVING BEEN CREAMATED CAN BE A LOT CHEAPER IN LIE OF BUYING A $5,000 CASKET.
tHEY SIMPLY DIDN’T BRING THE ASHES TO THE GRAVE BECAUSE USUALLY THE FAMILY TAKES THE ASHES HOME

JESUS I TRUST IN YOU

JR

 

[rkrispies]

There are a few funerals I have been to (Catholic and not) where the casket was taken to a chapel for the final committal.

My wife’s grandfathers were both taken to a chapel. One was placed in a mausoleum where there was barely room for the casket and priest to stand by the actual alcove, thus, chapel. The other grandfather (non-Catholic ceremony) died in January, so the grave could not be dug until the ground thawed, thus chapel.

I’m not sure if any of that applies (I sort of doubt it), but there may be reasons why an actual graveside service was not conducted.

 

[Chatter163]

**I’m glad to say that where I live (Georgia), people will pull over to the side of the road until the hearse and at least the family vehicles have passed. There is usually a police/sheriff escort and I’ve never known of a charge for this service. **

In many large cities, off-duty police officers work funeral details as an extra overtime job. The fee is paid to the funeral home as one of the fees of the funeral package, just like running an obituary in a newspaper. In other places private security officers have begun handling these, with marked motorcycles that have lights. They are legally allowed to stop traffic and go through red lights,

BTW, bold type is probably not needed here. Some would consider it shouting when the entire text is typed thay way. .

 

[puzzleannie]

I The weather was fair, but they didn’t bring the casket to the grave site. Instead they just brought it to a chapel on the cemetery ground, said a few short prayers and it was over.

It seems to me to be a whole lot different than in the not so distant past.

When did these changes occur, and why?

maybe it is simply the rules of that particular cemetary

 

[PatriceA]

When my husband’s grandfather died last year, in the Greensburg Diocese, the family was given the option of where they would like the prayers to take place at the cemetary. The family chose the Chapel at the cemetary, due to the fraility of some of the family members as it would be easier for them to access the Chapel as opposed to the actual grave site.

 

[Hboggs]

In many large cities, off-duty police officers work funeral details as an extra overtime job. The fee is paid to the funeral home as one of the fees of the funeral package, just like running an obituary in a newspaper. In other places private security officers have begun handling these, with marked motorcycles that have lights. They are legally allowed to stop traffic and go through red lights,

BTW, bold type is probably not needed here. Some would consider it shouting when the entire text is typed thay way. .

There was no intent to “shout”. If I had, I would have “shouted” like this.

 

[Allegra]

One thing that I have noticed is that there is more respect shown in some parts of the country than others when it comes to funeral processions to the gravesite. Where we live, there is little to no respect shown for such processions. Some drivers get irritated even with police allow the procession to go through red lights. Some blast their horns because they have to wait for the cars to go. It was a different story when I attended my mother-in-law’s funeral in St.Charles, Mo about 5 years ago. It was a very long procession of cars, but many cars would pull over to let the procession pass! And we didn’t have a police escort! It has been a long time since I have seen such respect shown for a funeral procession to the gravesite.

There is nothing grosser than people who honk and interrupt funeral procession. I like to think that most of them are just stupid and don’t know what a long line of cars with yellow signs that say ‘funeral’ following a hearse means, but I suspect that most of them are just gross people. I live across the river from St. Charles and funeral processions around here are a frequent occurance.

 

[centurionguard]

I haven’t attended a whole lot of funerals in recent years, and most have omitted the ride to the cemetery. Most folks prefer to rent a casket and then just bury cremains later it seems.

But I attended a funeral which included a drive to the graveyard a couple of weeks ago- in the Greensburg PA diocese if that makes a diff- and the protocol has changed.

The weather was fair, but they didn’t bring the casket to the grave site. Instead they just brought it to a chapel on the cemetery ground, said a few short prayers and it was over.

It seems to me to be a whole lot different than in the not so distant past.

When did these changes occur, and why?

I don’t think this is a norm. Perhaps there were unseen circumstance where the priest was unable to go to the grave site and make the Rite of Committal.

Having worked as a former sacristan just short of a decade I’ve witnessed hundreds of Funerals. Normally the parish priest accompanies the family of the deceased to the grave after the Requiem Mass or until after the optional reception. It depends upon the family wishes and often too the season of the year usually in the middle of (Winter) there are no committals until after spring thaw.

In my father’s Requiem Mass held on the morning of Christmas Eve which was technically still in the season of Advent, the parish priest understandable was unable to come to the grave-site. He gave us a prayer book and Holy Water and our Family offered prayers and sprinkled the casket with holy water as we made our final respects as the casket was lowered in the grave.

As I said previously; this is not a norm that a priest doesn’t accompany the family after the Funeral and make the Rite of Committal. Plainly unseen circumstances.

The omission of the Rite of Committal by a priest doesn’t invalidate the Requiem Mass or the last Sacrament Extreme Unction.

 

[Phemie]

I don’t think this is a norm. Perhaps there were unseen circumstance where the priest was unable to go to the grave site and make the Rite of Committal.

In my father’s Requiem Mass held on the morning of Christmas Eve which was technically still in the season of Advent, the parish priest understandable was unable to come to the grave-site. He gave us a prayer book and Holy Water and our Family offered prayers and sprinkled the casket with holy water as we made our final respects as the casket was lowered in the grave.

I don’t get it. What was going on on Christmas Eve morning to prevent the priest from going to the grave site?