Funerals and weddings: what does your priest say to non-Catholics regarding the reception of communion?

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Funerals and weddings (and other events with many non-Catholic visitors): what does your priest say to non-Catholics regarding the reception of communion?
 
When my sister got married, the priest (a very dear friend of mine) said that Catholics in good standing may receive the Eucharist, but those who are not Catholic may receive a blessing.

I had him mention this due to an incident at my grandmother’s funeral when my non-Catholic family members tried to receive the Eucharist.

I think an announcement before Communion is best, just so that everyone is aware that this is not something that we are to be taking lightly!
 
The priests at our parish make it VERY clear that Holy Communion is only open to Catholics who are in a state of grace. They never soft pedal this - it is very important that it is understood clearly and correctly.

~Liza
 
RosalynR said:
When my sister got married, the priest (a very dear friend of mine) said that Catholics in good standing may receive the Eucharist, but those who are not Catholic may receive a blessing.

I had him mention this due to an incident at my grandmother’s funeral when my non-Catholic family members tried to receive the Eucharist.

I think an announcement before Communion is best, just so that everyone is aware that this is not something that we are to be taking lightly!
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I don’t know how long ago your sister got married, but, you may want to mention to him that it is not necessarily his perrogative to invite non-communicants to receive a blessing.

These are the observations that the Congregation for Divine Worship and the Discipline of the Sacraments made regarding this matter:
1**. The liturgical blessing of the Holy Mass is properly given to each and to all at the conclusion of the Mass, just a few moments subsequent to the distribution of Holy Communion.**
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  1. Lay people, within the context of Holy Mass, are unable to confer blessings. These blessings, rather, are the competence of the priest (cf. Ecclesia de Mysterio, Notitiae 34 (15 Aug. 1997), art. 6, § 2; Canon 1169, § 2; and Roman Ritual De Benedictionibus (1985), n. 18).
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  1. Furthermore, the laying on of a hand or hands — which has its own sacramental significance, inappropriate here — by those distributing Holy Communion, in substitution for its reception, is to be explicitly discouraged.
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  1. The Apostolic Exhortation Familiaris Consortio n. 84, “forbids any pastor, for whatever reason to pretext even of a pastoral nature, to perform ceremonies of any kind for divorced people who remarry”. To be feared is that any form of blessing in substitution for communion would give the impression that the divorced and remarried have been returned, in some sense, to the status of Catholics in good standing.
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  1. **In a similar way, for others who are not to be admitted to Holy Communion in accord with the norm of law, the Church’s discipline has already made clear that they should not approach Holy Communion nor receive a blessing. This would include non-Catholics and those envisaged in can. 915 (i.e., those under the penalty of excommunication or interdict, and others who obstinately persist in manifest grave sin). **
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This statement came out in November 2008 and it appears in Notitiae, the official publication for the CDWDS.
 
Our priest says nothing and would no more think of refusing them Communion than I would of walking to the moon. He’s also received Communion in the Anglican Church.
 
Lepanto said:
Funerals and weddings (and other events with many non-Catholic visitors): what does your priest say to non-Catholics regarding the reception of communion?
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I cantor for many funerals and weddings in various parishes in my area. Most of the priests have asked non-Catholics and those Catholics not in the state of grace to stay in their pews and make an act of spiritual communion. It’s not that common anymore for a priest to invite people up for a blessing. In fact, I haven’t seen it done in a few years. Once in a while a priest won’t say anything, but then I usually find out in the program that the bridal couple had already made it clear who could receive the Eucharist.
 
Phemie said:
Our priest says nothing and would no more think of refusing them Communion than I would of walking to the moon. He’s also received Communion in the Anglican Church.
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Why in the world do you still go there? Have you called your Bishop and made him aware of this?

I’m so sorry you have to endure such behavior by your priest. 😦

~Liza
 
I heard a Priestsay once that the most “First communions” a Priest will give in his lifetime are at weddings and funderals. Our pastor always announces that non-Catholics can not receive commun ion and makes no mention of a blessing. He says this at every Mass.
 
lizaanne said:
Why in the world do you still go there? Have you called your Bishop and made him aware of this?

I’m so sorry you have to endure such behavior by your priest. 😦

~Liza
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It’s that or nothing.

The bishop also gives Communion to non-Catholics, so no help there: when approached just before a funeral at which he was the celebrant and asked directly by some dignitary’s aide-de-camp if his boss, a non-Catholic, could receive Communion the bishop’s reply was “Pretend you didn’t ask the question.” Needless to say the non-Catholic received. The transitional deacon was apoplectic.
 
Phemie said:
It’s that or nothing.

The bishop also gives Communion to non-Catholics, so no help there: when approached just before a funeral at which he was the celebrant and asked directly by some dignitary’s aide-de-camp if his boss, a non-Catholic, could receive Communion the bishop’s reply was “Pretend you didn’t ask the question.” Needless to say the non-Catholic received. The transitional deacon was apoplectic.
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I’m sorry that you have to deal with all of this. It must be frustrating to not have anyone to go to about it.
 
At my grandfather’s funeral mass many years ago, Fr. said any baptised person who wished could receive communion:shrug: I think this happens more frequently than most would like to believe.
 
At my Dad’s funeral the priest didn’t wait for people to go to Communion but came down and gave Communion to everyone in the front pew – which included my brother’s Jewish partner (not business).
 
Lepanto said:
He says nothing, i.e., ALL ARE WELCOME!
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Saying nothing means all are welcome?

Maybe saying nothing means that he believes the people in the pews are of average intelligence and know that they are at a Catholic funeral/wedding? Growing up as a good little evangelical girl, I knew that Catholics practiced “closed communion” and I would have never thought that at a wedding I could recieve. I was not some super smart person, and I knew what was “polite” to do at a Catholic wedding. Maybe we should give others the benefit of the doubt that they know how to mind their manners?

At mixed weddings, I’ve always seen it explained in the program.

I’ve only been to one Catholic funeral, so, I don’t have a real sampling.
 
kage_ar said:
Saying nothing means all are welcome?

Maybe saying nothing means that he believes the people in the pews are of average intelligence and know that they are at a Catholic funeral/wedding? Growing up as a good little evangelical girl, I knew that Catholics practiced “closed communion” and I would have never thought that at a wedding I could recieve. I was not some super smart person, and I knew what was “polite” to do at a Catholic wedding. Maybe we should give others the benefit of the doubt that they know how to mind their manners?

At mixed weddings, I’ve always seen it explained in the program.

I’ve only been to one Catholic funeral, so, I don’t have a real sampling.
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Unfortunately, everyone is not like you. At a recent funeral I saw the United Church minister & his wife receive Communion. Apparently they are not aware that Catholics don’t have open Communion – maybe it has something to do with the fact that it has never been said, or practiced from what I can see, in our church in the 12 years I’ve been here?
 
Our priest explains in English and Spanish that Holy Communion is for Catholics only-who have made their first communion and are free of any serious sin such as missing Mass on Sunday. Those wishing a blessing are asked to stay in the pews as a final blessing is given to all. All who can not receive are invited to join the faithful in Spiritual Comminion.
 
Our priest normally on a Sunday will only invite those (meaning Catholics) in good standing to come forward for communion. This past Sunday, he explicity spoke in his homily about the meaning Mary being a perpetual virgin, and how it states that in our creed. He then during the invitation for Communion, said “only those who believe Mary was a perpetual virgin” come forward. In my mind, because I know this is a battle for some, I wondered if anybody would NOT come forward! I didn’t pay attention, though.

There is a church near us that used to have extremely liberal priests. It offered (every Sunday) communion to ANY “who believe”. I grew up Protestant, and that is just what the Protestants said! I know somebody who grew up in that church, and she still wants liberal priests. She doesn’t like our current priest because he is young and very strict. He even had a chalice removed from one of the tri-parishes because it was just glass, donated by somebody of that parish with lots of money. It was elaborate, but not “prescious metal”. This priest said, “I only enforce, I don’t set the rules”. Many were very upset. I was happy that he took a stand on following rules. In that same parish, they removed all kneelers. What is that about?

I feel like every time a priest relaxes one area, it is likely another will be relaxed. We will slowly lose our traditions this way.

Heidi
 
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