Funny and/or weird things your kids have done, or you did as kids?

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LoveGod102

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I’ll start. When I was little, I snuck downstairs while my mom was napping, and put a leash on our dog and tied the leash to a lamp. She then pulled the lamp down. Not my plan, and I was so afraid I of getting in trouble, which I did.
Oh… and I once dumped an entire bottle of olive oil on the kitchen floor while my mom was making dinner, and then dumped an open can of pineapples on top of it! I was about 2 at the time.
Not to mention the time I (according to my mom) started freaking out for no apparent reason when she was carrying me in the house, and caused us both to fall down and cut either my face or lip open. (I don’t remember which, because I have a scar both on my lip and my face from two separate incidents when I was little, which I can’t remember.)
 
Decided to stick an uncooked spaghetti noodle in an ear, had to have the broken-off fragment removed by a doctor.

Another story: polished the floor for sliding by getting socks wet with furniture polish and sliding around on it. Great run-and-slide floor, until the family member not in on the waxing project happened across it is his stocking feet, nearly breaking his neck. (Not literally, but close enough!)
 
Monicad said:
My then three year old daughter was sitting quietly with us when Easter Mass was about to start. The Knights of Columbus were there and if you are familiar with their uniform it is very fancy with hats that have plumes with feathers in them and they carry swords. While they were processing in my daughter stood up on the pew, pointed at them and screamed “Look mom, PIRATES!”
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Ha ha that is funny. 😃 When my uncle was a toddler living out in a little bush town, they had a rare visit from the city Bishop for some special Mass. It was lots of pomp and ceremony with the Bishop in his mitre walking up the aisle to enthusiastic hymn singing and organ playing. When the hymn finished and there was hushed silence, my uncle yelled out in his big foghorn voice… ‘hats off in the house!’ Apparently the Bishop was amused by my grandmother nearly died.
 
When my sons were little, four-ish and two-ish there was an add on TV for a floor cleaning product where a famous Aussie artist, Pro Hart, created a magnificent picture on the carpet using kitchen products like tomato sauce, cornflakes, jam, biscuits, whipped cream etc. Then the cleaner walks in with her bucket and mop to have to clean it all up.

One day I had a friend over for coffee and we were sitting on the deck talking for ages when I realised the boys were unusually quiet. We went into their room to find that they were in the process of recreating the scene from that advertisement with everything they could find from the kitchen! Flour, tea, sauce, honey, everything. It was on their beds, the floor and even up the wall. They’d even got some, uhum, feminine products from the bathroom and pulled the sticky strip off to make a nice long line along the wall.

That was in the days before camera phones otherwise I’d have taken photos as proof of the degree of destruction I encountered that day. After that I made a point of making comments with regards to all the behaviours we saw on TV that I didn’t want them to recreate in our life!
 
My three year old granddaughter was the recipient
of almost every member of her family this Christmas
from both sides. I asked her today while reviewing
the holiday which uncle was her favorite? She
said Uncle Kacy. Why? I asked.
She replied “cause he’s not here”.

Relative overload lol
 
Apparently when I was a small child around the age of 4 there was one day my Dad wanted to attend mass alone without me. So he asked our babysitter to watch me and my baby brother during his time at mass. I was so upset with him that he would leave me out of mass. I ran out of the house all the way to church. (This was in San Diego by the way. Apparently I had to cross a few very busy streets). I made it to church. I flung open the church doors, ran to my Dad and at the top of my voice I yelled at him in front of the entire Parish…“DADDDDYYYY, YOU NEED TO TAKE ME TO MASS” My Dad was so embarrassed, he still tells me of this story to this day.
 
Granddaughter is obsessed with office products, and we know she has arrived by the sound of cellotape being ripped off the roll. She uses it to make envelopes to keeps scraps of paper in. A recent kiddy painting of hers arrived with two strips of white paper taped to the bottom of the page. It didn’t hide anything, not was it written on or painted. She just needed some cellotape in her finished picture.
 
My three year old loves to dance, and she’ll call out “Hey mom! Check out THESE sweet moves!” She’ll wiggle and wriggle her little bottom and flail her arms. She’ll usually then say something like “Oh wait, there’s more. Check THIS out!” or “I’m a vvveeerrryyyy ccccrrraaaazzzzyyyy girl!” She cracks me up. 😃 I could tell stories about her for hours.
 
I was just today thinking about when I was a teenager at Christmastime and played a recording of Silver Bells in the house and then began mocking the way shoppers sound when they are rude. My sister got out a tape recorder and asked me to do it again. Then we played it and laughed. My poor mother was in the kitchen listening to all this going on! So, anyway, this lead me to remember the 45 (speed) records we had, small vinyl records with holes in the middle. One time I put two of them on my ears - putting my ear through the hole in the record - then walked around the house wearing the records to see everyone’s reactions.

My four year old great nephew got a big laugh at Thanksgiving when he said he liked the sparkling apple cider and called it “apple beer”. He was a good sport, even though he had no idea why everyone laughed.
 
Millie123 said:
Apparently when I was a small child around the age of 4 there was one day my Dad wanted to attend mass alone without me. So he asked our babysitter to watch me and my baby brother during his time at mass. I was so upset with him that he would leave me out of mass. I ran out of the house all the way to church. (This was in San Diego by the way. Apparently I had to cross a few very busy streets). I made it to church. I flung open the church doors, ran to my Dad and at the top of my voice I yelled at him in front of the entire Parish…“DADDDDYYYY, YOU NEED TO TAKE ME TO MASS” My Dad was so embarrassed, he still tells me of this story to this day.
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:rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:

Oh my goodness, I can only imagine how your poor old dad felt when you did that! It’s a miracle you weren’t hurt running across busy streets!
 
LongingSoul said:
When my sons were little, four-ish and two-ish there was an add on TV for a floor cleaning product where a famous Aussie artist, Pro Hart, created a magnificent picture on the carpet using kitchen products like tomato sauce, cornflakes, jam, biscuits, whipped cream etc. Then the cleaner walks in with her bucket and mop to have to clean it all up.

One day I had a friend over for coffee and we were sitting on the deck talking for ages when I realised the boys were unusually quiet. We went into their room to find that they were in the process of recreating the scene from that advertisement with everything they could find from the kitchen! Flour, tea, sauce, honey, everything. It was on their beds, the floor and even up the wall. They’d even got some, uhum, feminine products from the bathroom and pulled the sticky strip off to make a nice long line along the wall.

That was in the days before camera phones otherwise I’d have taken photos as proof of the degree of destruction I encountered that day. After that I made a point of making comments with regards to all the behaviours we saw on TV that I didn’t want them to recreate in our life!
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OH. MY. GOODNESS. Reminds me of that video of those little kids who put flour ALL OVER THE HOUSE.
Did you ever get it all cleaned up, or are there stains to this day?
 
LoveGod102 said:
OH. MY. GOODNESS. Reminds me of that video of those little kids who put flour ALL OVER THE HOUSE.
Did you ever get it all cleaned up, or are there stains to this day?
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That was nearly 20 years ago but I can still feel the overwhelming feeling I had at seeing it all! :eek: I actually rang my H to see if he could come home from work early to help me but it wasnt possible. It took days to clean up and wash the bed quilts, sheets and mat. 😃
 
LongingSoul said:
That was nearly 20 years ago but I can still feel the overwhelming feeling I had at seeing it all! :eek: I actually rang my H to see if he could come home from work early to help me but it wasnt possible. It took days to clean up and wash the bed quilts, sheets and mat. 😃
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I can just imagine having to clean that up. Where did your kids sleep, if it wasn’t clean for days?
 
I placed my head in between the bannister railings. When I tried the get my head out, it wouldn’t. I tried some more, and it got out. My head hurt though. I told this story to my family just recently. My mom said how I could do such a thing, like if my head got injured or something. Kids do the darnest things!
 
I drank from a birdbath when I was about 4 years old. In that time and place it was possible to let a child go out and play unsupervised. I wandered into a neighbor’s yard where there was this birdbath consisting of a rusty metal pan atop a wooden stand. The pan was just high enough to reach my mouth, and when I leaned against it, the pan tipped toward me and the water ran into my mouth. I can still remember the elderly lady who lived in the house shouting at me out the window, “No! No! No!”
 
fin said:
I placed my head in between the bannister railings. When I tried the get my head out, it wouldn’t. I tried some more, and it got out. My head hurt though. I told this story to my family just recently. My mom said how I could do such a thing, like if my head got injured or something. Kids do the darnest things!
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I did that too! Pretty common in little kids, I think.
 
First off, I’m a guy.

Okay, now that that’s been cleared up, time to tell a quick story from my fifth birthday. My family was visiting my grandparents. I forget if we were staying with my grandparents or somewhere else, but one day we wound up at my aunt’s house. She had 4 daughters at the time. I was talking to one of my cousins, when they all lined up to get their nails done. Through a combination of 5-year-old logic (“Ooh, look! Line of people! I wonder what’s going on!”) and just wanting to continue talking, I hopped in line with her. My uncle noticed and gave me a chance to leave the line without painting my nails, but it’s still funny that 5-year-old me almost wound up getting his nails done.
 
Razanir said:
First off, I’m a guy.

Okay, now that that’s been cleared up, time to tell a quick story from my fifth birthday. My family was visiting my grandparents. I forget if we were staying with my grandparents or somewhere else, but one day we wound up at my aunt’s house. She had 4 daughters at the time. I was talking to one of my cousins, when they all lined up to get their nails done. Through a combination of 5-year-old logic (“Ooh, look! Line of people! I wonder what’s going on!”) and just wanting to continue talking, I hopped in line with her. My uncle noticed and gave me a chance to leave the line without painting my nails, but it’s still funny that 5-year-old me almost wound up getting his nails done.
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haha
 
I work in pediatrics, and so I hear a lot of funny things. One time, I was cleaning a boy’s arm with some alcohol. He asked if it was alcohol and I told him it was. He then said, “Daddy puts alcohol in his water bottle!” This resulted in about 10 minutes of his dad explaining that he snuck some beer into a sporting event because the beers are overpriced and then insisting that he does NOT put alcohol into water bottles regularly. Lol
 
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