I went to a conference last weekend. Before the first talk, I took out my old notebook to start a confession list. While leafing through the notebook, I found an old confession list.
I glanced through it, and thought, “yep, I can just use this list.”
I crossed off one thing that didn’t fit. And, I changed the frequency on a couple others.
sigh. My husband suggested that I just laminate it to save time in the future.
When will I ever progress!?!? I wonder if Jesus is as irritated with me as I am.
Not at all. I’ve told this story before, but I’ll repost it for you, because I find it helpful for myself, and I hope it will help you, too.
When my uncle was in the war, he had an experience very similar to what you are going through.
He was stuck up to his waist in a swamp, defending the same village from the same Japanese invaders, day after day after day. He was often tempted just to give up and let the Japanese take that village. But then he would look into the eyes of those little kids, and then he would go back into that swamp and fight again another day. Over and over and over again, week after week, month after month.
Soldiers were dying all around him. He wondered what it was all for.
Then suddenly one day, the Japanese were just gone. Day after day, they looked, and there were no Japanese any more. Eventually, someone came and told them that the war was over; the Japanese had surrendered.
So they went back to the village, and told the villagers the good news - the Japanese were gone, and were not coming back. Then, with very little fanfare, they went home. Nobody asked them where they had been, or what they had been doing. Everyone at home was talking about great battles, exciting moments in the war. Nobody really cared about a bunch of men who had spent the entire war standing in the same swamp, fighting the same battle over and over again.
Nobody, of course, except for those villagers. He still hears from the children, sometimes - they’re grown now, and they write to him, sometimes. They remember him, and they’re still grateful that he didn’t leave them to the “mercies” of the Japanese. They’re glad they got the chance to go to school, to go into business, to get married, and to have families of their own. All because he kept fighting the same battle over and over and over again, without giving up.
So, when you go into the Confessional with the same list yet again, remember my uncle, up to his waist in a swamp, fighting that same battle, over again. And know that Jesus understands that sometimes, to win the battle, you just have to stay put and keep fighting, regardless of outward appearances.
). I like your goal. I’ll do my kitchen, too! It’d be nice to wake up to a clean kitchen.