Gay Godparent

[SeekerCV]

My wife and I will be baptizing our 5-month-old twins in March. My wife and I had settled on one set of Godparents for both twins. But recently, my wife has begun to express her desire to have her aunt’s girlfriend be the Godmother to one of our twins. She currently babysits the twins for us, and she does adore them as she does her own 2 daughters (from her previous marriage).

Is this even possible? Would be a sin to have a gay woman baptize one of our babies?

Help!

Thank you all, and God bless you all.

Chris

 

[Friar_David_O.Carm]

SeekerCV:

My wife and I will be baptizing our 5-month-old twins in March. My wife and I had settled on one set of Godparents for both twins. But recently, my wife has begun to express her desire to have her aunt’s girlfriend be the Godmother to one of our twins. She currently babysits the twins for us, and she does adore them as she does her own 2 daughters (from her previous marriage).

Is this even possible? Would be a sin to have a gay woman baptize one of our babies?

Help!

Thank you all, and God bless you all.

Chris

One of the duties of a Godparent is to make sure that the child is raised within the Catholic Church if the parents pass on.

So I do not think this is a good idea as this person and your wife’s aunt do not live what the Church Teaches. I would even question if this is a good person to be babysitting you children.

One other note, the Godparents do not do the baptizing, the priest (or deacon) do.

 

[buffalo]

NO! You want a Godparent to be a faithful practicing Catholic. It is much more than let’s just pick someone we know.
[
The Role of Godparents](http://www.catholicculture.org/docs/doc_view.cfm?recnum=1465)

 

[setter]

buffalo:

NO! You want a Godparent to be a faithful practicing Catholic. It is much more than let’s just pick someone we know.
[
The Role of Godparents](http://www.catholicculture.org/docs/doc_view.cfm?recnum=1465)

If by “gay woman” you mean someone afflicted with SSA who actively lives or promotes the “gay” lifestyle, then that person would not qualify as a candidate for godparent.

I wish every pastor had this clarity and courage when screening candidates for godparents:

(article excerpt)

Here we should pause to clarify who qualifies as a Catholic godparent. … Moreover, if a person is Catholic but antagonistic to the faith, i.e. has the attitude “I am a Catholic but…,” and would not be a good example and witness to the faith also disqualifies himself.

As a pastor, I am truly perturbed each time someone comes by the rectory office and wants me to sign a sponsor’s certificate and attest that he is a practicing Catholic when I do not recognize him, he has not registered in the parish and he does not attend Mass faithfully. In justice, I cannot meet such a request.

Parents need to find good practicing Catholics for godparents.

Addendum: Depending on your relationship with your aunt and/or her “gay woman” friend, this can be an opportunity for evangelization.

 

[john_ennis]

SeekerCV:

My wife and I will be baptizing our 5-month-old twins in March. My wife and I had settled on one set of Godparents for both twins. But recently, my wife has begun to express her desire to have her aunt’s girlfriend be the Godmother to one of our twins. She currently babysits the twins for us, and she does adore them as she does her own 2 daughters (from her previous marriage).

Is this even possible? Would be a sin to have a gay woman baptize one of our babies?

Help!

Thank you all, and God bless you all.

Chris

You are choosing Godparents for the purpose of teaching the kids the faith, right? Would this woman say that she believes that the Catholic Church teaches the truth regarding faith and morals?

Only God knows whether it’s a sin or not; depends on your intent to do what you know/believe to be right and true.

Peace.

John

 

[estesbob]

SeekerCV:

My wife and I will be baptizing our 5-month-old twins in March. My wife and I had settled on one set of Godparents for both twins. But recently, my wife has begun to express her desire to have her aunt’s girlfriend be the Godmother to one of our twins. She currently babysits the twins for us, and she does adore them as she does her own 2 daughters (from her previous marriage).

Is this even possible? Would be a sin to have a gay woman baptize one of our babies?

Help!

Thank you all, and God bless you all.

Chris

Not only should she not be the godmother to your child she should not be babysittng your twins. By allowng that you a tacticly condoning her realtationship with your aunt. Your children are being expoased to a person who is living a sinful life-how do you rationalize that to your twins when they are older?

 

[Island_Oak]

SeekerCV:

…recently, my wife has begun to express her desire to have her aunt’s girlfriend be the Godmother to one of our twins. She currently babysits the twins for us, and she does adore them as she does her own 2 daughters…Is this even possible?

You’re kidding us, right?

Baptism is one of but a very few opportunities in which a human being can partake and actually receive God’s grace during his/her lifetime. It is not an opportunity for a popularity contest–with the grand prize being the title of “Godparent.” Neither affection, adoration nor babysitting status determines the qualifications for the role of Godparent. If you intend to baptize your children and raise them Catholic, perhaps you and your wife need a refresher course on all that is involved and expected of Godparents by virtue of this sacrament.

I say this not to be glib, but so that you may truly understand the obligations you are undertaking. SSA has absolutely nothing to do with a person’s worth, value, right to engage in a profession, rent an appartment, vote, be a wonderful friend or decent and responsible member of society, etc. But, having a publicly practicising homosexual stand up in the role of moral guadian and spiritual guide for your child as a Catholic is utterly ridiculous and patently offensive to the faith you are professing. If you disagree with or plan to disregard Church teachings or practice, baptism of your children into the Catholic faith becomes a meaningless gesture.

 

[John_Kearns]

Just wanted to say that the replies here were quite uplifting. I’m new to the forums, though a 4-5 year reader of This Rock, and have been dismayed at some of what I’ve seen on some of the other forums. 100% orthodox responses on this thread, thus far.

Thank you!

 

[Ana]

Island Oak:

You’re kidding us, right?

Baptism is one of but a very few opportunities in which a human being can partake and actually receive God’s grace during his/her lifetime. It is not an opportunity for a popularity contest–with the grand prize being the title of “Godparent.” Neither affection, adoration nor babysitting status determines the qualifications for the role of Godparent. If you intend to baptize your children and raise them Catholic, perhaps you and your wife need a refresher course on all that is involved and expected of Godparents by virtue of this sacrament.

I say this not to be glib, but so that you may truly understand the obligations you are undertaking. SSA has absolutely nothing to do with a person’s worth, value, right to engage in a profession, rent an appartment, vote, be a wonderful friend or decent and responsible member of society, etc. But, having a publicly practicising homosexual stand up in the role of moral guadian and spiritual guide for your child as a Catholic is utterly ridiculous and patently offensive to the faith you are professing. If you disagree with or plan to disregard Church teachings or practice, baptism of your children into the Catholic faith becomes a meaningless gesture.

Excellent post!!

 

[m134e5]

You don’t ask someone to be a Godparent just to include them in your child’s life. A Godparent is supposed to teach the child the Faith if, for whatever reason, the parents are unable to. A Godparent therefore must live by the Faith.

 

[goofyjim]

I suffer with SSA but do not promote the homosexual lifestyle and am in agreement with the Catholic Church. My brother chose me as a godfather for his oldest son. Is there anything wrong with that?

 

[Tantum_ergo]

I suffer with SSA but do not promote the homosexual lifestyle and am in agreement with the Catholic Church. My brother chose me as a godfather for his oldest son. Is there anything wrong with that?

No, dear friend, there is nothing wrong with that. You are trying to uphold the faith while shouldering a heavy cross. That is inspiring.

However, a person with SSA who (apparently from reading the OP) is the “girlfriend” of the poster’s aunt, if she is in a sinful relationship with that aunt, would NOT be a good candidate. Further, if the OP were considering a godparent who was HETEROSEXUAL yet in a sinful relationship with another person, that heterosexual person would not be a good candidate either.

It is the giving in to sin that makes the person a poor candidate, not the SSA or any other sin which people STRUGGLE AGAINST yet live according to Church teachings in humble faith, hope, and love.

 

[Dorothy]

goofyjim:

I suffer with SSA but do not promote the homosexual lifestyle and am in agreement with the Catholic Church. My brother chose me as a godfather for his oldest son. Is there anything wrong with that?

According to what you wrote above, I can see nothing wrong with your being a godparent.

 

[proud_father]

As a father of one child (two years old) and expecting another (in 10 days) I am surprised and actually depressed by what I have just read. I have never come across such a group of closed minded individuals in my lifetime (and I am 36). Here is why:

When my christian wife (of 12 years) told me that she wanted to consider asking the best person (she or I have ever known and happens to be a gay male) to be a godparent of our unborn daughter my initial thought was “of course, he is one of the best people I have ever had the pleasure in knowing”, unfortunately my second thought was of concern of how this would be excepted by society and my religion (catholic). I find this to be very unfortunate as it next made me ask myself if I have been so influenced by society and by religion that I have to go against what I know to be true. What I mean by this is the fact that this person, James, who is in my opinion an absolute model (of course besides his sexual preference) of what a person in our society should thrive to be like is not suitable enough to be my child’s godparent. This makes me question my religion in a serious way and also makes me wonder if religion is really as good (in general) as I thought it was. I guess what I am ultimately saying (and I know this is a bit rambling as I have become a little disappointed and upset) is that a person I know to be considered by this board as being unsuitable or good enough to fill the role of godparent is a much better person (not trying to judge but it is obvious) than those on this board.

I think it is time for some of those on this board (who have posted such) to think deeply (as I have) about what they have posted and ask themselves if they are really posting what they know is true or are have they been brainwashed by someone else’s views (either religion or society).

peace

 

[Sheeniac]

find this to be very unfortunate as it next made me ask myself if I have been so influenced by society and by religion that I have to go against what I know to be true.

I was an atheist for 25 years, and have been back in the Church for almost 3 years (I’m 42). What I know to be true is that Christ established His Church on earth and this Church is the Catholic Church. It cannot error in terms of faith and morals.

What I know to be true IS influenced by the Church (not society - I’m an independent thinker who chooses to submit myself to the Chuch’s dogma/doctrine).

The point of a godparent is to raise the children faithfully in the Catholic faith. How can they do so when they raise their own sexual practices above the Church’s teachings? One could argue that we all sin, and we most certainly do! But once we start defining ourselves by our sins, and being proud of them instead of struggling against them, we cross the line.

 

[Dorothy]

As a father of one child (two years old) and expecting another (in 10 days) I am surprised and actually depressed by what I have just read. I have never come across such a group of closed minded individuals in my lifetime (and I am 36). Here is why:

When my christian wife (of 12 years) told me that she wanted to consider asking the best person (she or I have ever known and happens to be a gay male) to be a godparent of our unborn daughter my initial thought was “of course, he is one of the best people I have ever had the pleasure in knowing”, unfortunately my second thought was of concern of how this would be excepted by society and my religion (catholic). I find this to be very unfortunate as it next made me ask myself if I have been so influenced by society and by religion that I have to go against what I know to be true. What I mean by this is the fact that this person, James, who is in my opinion an absolute model (of course besides his sexual preference) of what a person in our society should thrive to be like is not suitable enough to be my child’s godparent. This makes me question my religion in a serious way and also makes me wonder if religion is really as good (in general) as I thought it was. I guess what I am ultimately saying (and I know this is a bit rambling as I have become a little disappointed and upset) is that a person I know to be considered by this board as being unsuitable or good enough to fill the role of godparent is a much better person (not trying to judge but it is obvious) than those on this board.

I think it is time for some of those on this board (who have posted such) to think deeply (as I have) about what they have posted and ask themselves if they are really posting what they know is true or are have they been brainwashed by someone else’s views (either religion or society).

peace

“proud father”

Please see post #13 on this board.

You haven’t said if the person you mention is actively living the homosexual lifestyle, or if they have same-sex attraction and are living a chaste life in accordance with the teachings of Holy Mother Church.

In the past, my sister-in-law, then a widow, had decided to have an affair with a man. My sister-in-law is an amiable person, but that is besides the point. She lived in another state but called me and told me they would like to come for a visit. I was happy with that, and told her that we can accommodate her and her male friend in two separate bedrooms.

She understood, and did not fuss about that. It wasn’t long after that she was aware she had made some very bad choices and was not happy, and decided to end the relationship.

What I did was not “judging”. The Lord helped me say what I did with His Peace. There are times when we need to “instruct” others by the stance we take, without anger and resentment at their choices.

Galatians 6:1 “Brothers, even if a person is caught in some transgression, you who are spiritual should correct that one in a gentle spirit, looking to yourself, so that you also may not be tempted.”

I repeat, as I wrote above, if this person you mention is in agreement with Church teaching and is living a chaste lifestyle, then there is no reason to not permit him to be a God parent.

Peace in Jesus,

Dorothy

 

[Cypress_TX_Mom]

I think you’re confusing role of Godparents with who you’d put in a will to raise your child if God forbid something would happen to you because you feel this person is super wonderful and fantastic. I know plenty of great and wonderful people. Great enough that if my husband and I passed away, I’d trust to raise my kids. Doesn’t mean they are Godparent worthy.

Godparent’s role is special, very important and totally Catholic-centered. Totally faith-lifting and supporting. Instead it’s become a way for parents to pick their best friends, closest relatives to show how much they appreciate the persons they choose not nothing to do with how religious, faithful to Church teachings and spiritually Catholic they are. Most kids have Godparents that aren’t involved in their spiritual lives. They are title-holding but not practicing true Godparents.

As a father of one child (two years old) and expecting another (in 10 days) I am surprised and actually depressed by what I have just read. I have never come across such a group of closed minded individuals in my lifetime (and I am 36). Here is why:

When my christian wife (of 12 years) told me that she wanted to consider asking the best person (she or I have ever known and happens to be a gay male) to be a godparent of our unborn daughter my initial thought was “of course, he is one of the best people I have ever had the pleasure in knowing”, unfortunately my second thought was of concern of how this would be excepted by society and my religion (catholic). I find this to be very unfortunate as it next made me ask myself if I have been so influenced by society and by religion that I have to go against what I know to be true. What I mean by this is the fact that this person, James, who is in my opinion an absolute model (of course besides his sexual preference) of what a person in our society should thrive to be like is not suitable enough to be my child’s godparent. This makes me question my religion in a serious way and also makes me wonder if religion is really as good (in general) as I thought it was. I guess what I am ultimately saying (and I know this is a bit rambling as I have become a little disappointed and upset) is that a person I know to be considered by this board as being unsuitable or good enough to fill the role of godparent is a much better person (not trying to judge but it is obvious) than those on this board.

I think it is time for some of those on this board (who have posted such) to think deeply (as I have) about what they have posted and ask themselves if they are really posting what they know is true or are have they been brainwashed by someone else’s views (either religion or society).

peace