Gay marriage OK because homosexuals born that way and deserve to have romantic relationships too?

[pete_29]

It is impossible for me to be calm in a Church due to my past history with it, most churches in fact actually trigger panic attacks and mental breakdowns. It’s not exactly an environment I can be ‘calm’ in.

I’ll pray things work out for you.

 

[pathia]

My sexuality is no longer a struggle for me because I am at peace about it and for that I am so thankful! God bless!

That’s what I wish I knew something about. People won’t let me be at peace. I can just stop going to Church, which is what I’ve done because of the aforementioned panic issues, but I cannot just ignore my family.

I too spent years praying that something would change, but it never did. I did the whole “reparative therapy” bit as well and that was just a waste of time and money

I’m glad you made it out alive. I’m glad there are people strong enough to survive it. Though, maybe I’m just weak and had similarly weak friends, but most of my compatriots from those days are wrecks just like me. I just don’t know.

It destroyed my life and my sanity. I can’t be without psychiatric drugs now, after those attempts to ‘cure’ me.

 

[forever_always]

I dont think anyone is “born gay”… i think it’s just a matter of how certain people or brought up… wanting attention… etc. it’s your decisions to practice your sexuality as God designed it, you were not made to be sexually attracted to the opposite gender.

 

[RyanML]

That’s what I wish I knew something about. People won’t let me be at peace. I can just stop going to Church, which is what I’ve done because of the aforementioned panic issues, but I cannot just ignore my family.

Jesus said that He came that we might have life, and life abundantly. Jeramias 29:11 says “For I know the thoughts that I think towards you, saith the Lord, thoughts of peace, and not of affliction, to give you an end and patience”. It would be easy for me to tell you to just pray and allow God to work in your life, but I know the suffering that can come with rejection, and it’s all much easier said than done. You will be in my prayers, that God will lead you closer to Himself and that you will have peace. God bless!

 

[pathia]

I dont think anyone is “born gay”… i think it’s just a matter of how certain people or brought up… wanting attention… etc. it’s your decisions to practice your sexuality as God designed it, you were not made to be sexually attracted to the opposite gender.

Then explain how I was in 10years of therapy and under fairly constant observation as a child to prevent homosexuality, yet it didn’t do anything? It’s not from a lack of trying, let me assure you!

 

[Cara_Serrano]

I’ll detail what I’ve done to try to get an answer from God, I’ve covered it before, but it’s probably hard to dig out in all the threads here.

I’ve prayed for hours on end. That did nothing. I’ve done the rosary, I’ve prayed at church, prayed at home. Nothing. So I started to do more extreme things. I starved myself for days, tried the same thing again, nothing. I starved myself for even longer, an entire week, I only had water, then I prayed. Nothing. So I started to do more extreme things, I went out and simply wandered out onto the street for a few weeks to live homeless. Nothing. I’ve even done drugs, legal and otherwise to attempt to clear my mind or cloud it, or do anything.

If you have any other suggestions on things I haven’t tried yet, I am willing to try more things and I’m not being sarcastic. I really am willing to try just about anything. Yet I’ve yet to feel anything.

I have a suspicion it could be the psych meds I have to take, however, if I go off those I start to cut myself and work out suicide plots, so that’s not very productive either.

I really understand where you’re coming from! I have prayed for years without any visible results. I have fasted till I’ve passed out. I didn’t do the drug thing only because I was already on so many prescribed drugs that I didn’t want to feel even more drugged than usual. I said every novena I could find, prayed to every saint of every illness I had, and got nothing.

I don’t know why God doesn’t answer your prayers or mine. I do know that I feel a lot better now that I’ve stopped trying to impress Him with my spiritual gymnastics. His stony silence convinced me that He’s not impressed with my efforts so I’ve stopped. Jesus said, “If you love me, keep my Commandments” so that’s all I do now. I follow the big 10 and receive the sacraments and I don’t worry about the rest. I still pray, but only for other people because other people are the only ones I see God helping.

If the way to love God is to follow his commandments as Jesus says, then I guess I’ll get to heaven, but if there’s more to it, then I guess I won’t. I’m just too exhausted to do any more. Maybe you are, too. When you read the Gospels, you get the impression that Jesus cures everybody who asks him, but the truth is, he doesn’t. Sometimes he just lets you suffer. So follow the commandments, get on with your life as best you can, and use the time you spent on all those spiritual exercises to help someone else. That’s what I did and it seems to be working. My prayers were not answered, but I’m a lot happier since I stopped begging God to cure me.

 

[forever_always]

Then explain how I was in 10years of therapy and under fairly constant observation as a child to prevent homosexuality, yet it didn’t do anything? It’s not from a lack of trying, let me assure you!

Why were ou under constant observation as a child to prevent homosexuality? if it was a big deal when you were younger, that’s just how you were brought up to think.
i dunno, i’m not like… condeming you at all, and i’m no therapist and i’m certainly not God, nor holier than you… i was giving my two cents.

 

[RyanML]

My prayers were not answered, but I’m a lot happier since I stopped begging God to cure me.

Your prayers were answered…God’s answer was no! And, I would imagine you are a lot happier because there was nothing to cure in the first place. God bless!

 

[pathia]

Why were ou under constant observation as a child to prevent homosexuality? if it was a big deal when you were younger, that’s just how you were brought up to think.
i dunno, i’m not like… condeming you at all, and i’m no therapist and i’m certainly not God, nor holier than you… i was giving my two cents.

As soon as I began to play with things I was noticeably ‘too effeminate’ for people’s comforts, so they sought to fix that. Effeminate behavior in male children, or masculine in female children, is the #1 predictor of homosexuality according to most repairative therapists.

 

[GodLovesTheSpek]

It’s a tough cross to carry. Being homosexual isn’t the issue, just as being alcoholic or a drug abuser isn’t the issue. It is recognizing and what is being done with it. Homosexuality calls for chasity. One can certainly pray to made “straight” but include prayers for chasity. True love is tested love. Continue praying for a chaste life. Reconcile with the Church and avail yourself of sacraments. Carry the cross and keep going. It’s tough. It’s hard, it really is and it may last your entire natural life. Natural life is finite and nothing compared to eternity. Supernatual life lasts forever. If we make it heaven it will be joy never ending without any of these earthly burdens.

 

[pathia]

It’s a tough cross to carry. Being homosexual isn’t the issue, just as being alcoholic or a drug abuser isn’t the issue. It is recognizing and what is being done with it. Homosexuality calls for chasity. One can certainly pray to made “straight” but include prayers for chasity. True love is tested love. Continue praying for a chaste life. Reconcile with the Church and avail yourself of sacraments. Carry the cross and keep going. It’s tough. It’s hard, it really is and it may last your entire natural life. Natural life is finite and nothing compared to eternity. Supernatual life lasts forever. If we make it heaven it will be joy never ending without any of these earthly burdens.

Chastity isn’t a burden to me though, that’s the issue. People keep saying that, I’m simply completely incapable of having sex. Even if I wanted to, I cannot. Due to the butchering of me in my infancy and my hormonal issues, I simply don’t even have a ‘drive’. I don’t even know what that stuff MEANS.

The fact that chastity isn’t a burden and is ‘simple’ seems to be why people keep telling me I should do more, because it’s not supposed to be easy.

 

[RyanML]

It’s a tough cross to carry. Being homosexual isn’t the issue, just as being alcoholic or a drug abuser isn’t the issue.

There is quite a difference between being prone to abuse alcohol or drugs and being prone to love someone of the same gender.

 

[Bennie_P]

Ok, so homosexuals may not be born that way but they certainly cannot help it that they become homosexual, can they?

They only truly become homosexual if they act upon any same sex attraction feelings they may have. This word homosexual is a loaded word. People go through stages in how they feel and are attracted to others as they mature. If these feelings or attractions are acted on in the wrong way then it reinforces feelings which may or may not be appropriate. In the case of Same Sex attractions the Church teaches it is wrong and sinful to act out. Some people with these feelings may have better control then others or they may be stronger, the feelings stronger in one then another. The problem we have in today’s culture is these false ideas that if it feels good then do it. This is the trap many that have same-sex attraction fall in to.

They do not want think there is anything wrong with certain feelings, and of course none of us want to think there is something wrong about our feelings, emotions, character or etc. but each of us have parts of us that want to do the wrong thing, but all of us should strive to be the best we can.

In this argument of Homosexuality the majority of the people which do not want to recognize, IMHO, that there is something wrong with these disordered sexual feelings will, as any that are in denial of any disordered behavioral tendencies, want to beat the Church down and the rest of society with any every excuse that they are right and the Church is wrong. This truly a sign of immaturity, which many think, is the root of homosexual tendencies that is something went wrong in the process of individuals growing from childhood into adulthood. That is not say there are not intelligent, well meaning, and creative - even highly (worldly) successful persons that struggle with same sex attraction, in fact it appears that the more educated one is the more likely they may have problems with same-sex attractions. Go figure, maybe the tree of knowledge is truly evil

 

[Bennie_P]

There is quite a difference between being prone to abuse alcohol or drugs and being prone to love someone of the same gender.

Things in common though, that is to act on either can destroy one’s soul, destroy one’s health, and destroy relationships of those that love you and not forget both are habit forming if acted upon…

 

[goofyjim]

They only truly become homosexual if they act upon any same sex attraction feelings they may have. This word homosexual is a loaded word. People go through stages in how they feel and are attracted to others as they mature. If these feelings or attractions are acted on in the wrong way then it reinforces feelings which may or may not be appropriate. In the case of Same Sex attractions the Church teaches it is wrong and sinful to act out. Some people with these feelings may have better control then others or they may be stronger, the feelings stronger in one then another. The problem we have in today’s culture is these false ideas that if it feels good then do it. This is the trap many that have same-sex attraction fall in to.

They do not want think there is anything wrong with certain feelings, and of course none of us want to think there is something wrong about our feelings, emotions, character or etc. but each of us have parts of us that want to do the wrong thing, but all of us should strive to be the best we can.

In this argument of Homosexuality the majority of the people which do not want to recognize, IMHO, that there is something wrong with these disordered sexual feelings will, as any that are in denial of any disordered behavioral tendencies, want to beat the Church down and the rest of society with any every excuse that they are right and the Church is wrong. This truly a sign of immaturity, which many think, is the root of homosexual tendencies that is something went wrong in the process of individuals growing from childhood into adulthood. That is not say there are not intelligent, well meaning, and creative - even highly (worldly) successful persons that struggle with same sex attraction, in fact it appears that the more educated one is the more likely they may have problems with same-sex attractions. Go figure, maybe the tree of knowledge is truly evil

My basic instinct is to find a guy attractive. I refrain from activity because God requests it. I am still homosexual but celibate. I have been this way since birth. I could force myself to have heterosexual sex. But my nature is homosexual. It is not a sin. I wish everyone would listen to thelived experience of others before forming their judgements and talking high class.

 

[pathia]

That is not say there are not intelligent, well meaning, and creative - even highly (worldly) successful persons that struggle with same sex attraction, in fact it appears that the more educated one is the more likely they may have problems with same-sex attractions. Go figure, maybe the tree of knowledge is truly evil

Mental disorders run much more commonly in the more intelligent as well. I figure this in my mind by comparing it to a computer (which isn’t exact I know, but it’s close enough for an analogy). Someone who is smart, is running their brain at 100% more often, just like a computer or a car, maxing something out constantly can lead to ‘failure’ or a hiccup.

 

[Cara_Serrano]

My basic instinct is to find a guy attractive. I refrain from activity because God requests it. I am still homosexual but celibate. I have been this way since birth. I could force myself to have heterosexual sex. But my nature is homosexual. It is not a sin. I wish everyone would listen to thelived experience of others before forming their judgements and talking high class.

I think you’re right about this. I don’t think homosexual people can change who they are attracted to any more than heterosexual people can. The potential for sin lies not in our sexual orientation, but how we act on it. I applaud your efforts to be homosexual and celibate. I wish more heterosexual men had the moral fortitude to be celibate while they are single.

 

[buffalo]

I think you’re right about this. I don’t think homosexual people can change who they are attracted to any more than heterosexual people can. The potential for sin lies not in our sexual orientation, but how we act on it. I applaud your efforts to be homosexual and celibate. I wish more heterosexual men had the moral fortitude to be celibate while they are single.

Stephen Bennett Ministries

 

[Cara_Serrano]

Your prayers were answered…God’s answer was no! And, I would imagine you are a lot happier because there was nothing to cure in the first place. God bless!

How very glib to assume that since God wouldn’t cure me, there’s “nothing to cure in the first place”. Let me clear this up for you. I am happier because I stopped pleading with God for something He had no intention of giving me. However, my doctor would disagree with you that there is “nothing to cure”. I still have cancer!

 

[pathia]

Stephen Bennett Ministries

We have gone over this before. I was forced into therapies such as this and then when I was 13-17 I went to them of my own free will. All they did was cause misery, despair and suicidal thoughts. Of the kids I started with at the age of 8, half were dead by their own hands even before they turned 18. Several others are completely lost, I have no idea where they are, they may be dead too.