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guest20112011
Guest
I have read some of the other threads started on this topic, but saw that we shouldnt revive old threads. I have been confessing past sins, about every 2 weeks since December. A couple times I went into the confessional with a list of 50 plus sins from the past. I always confessed my past sins after my current confession. Every time I went I was so confident that I recalled them all, but they kept coming and coming. I spent PLEANTY of time doing examination of concious, but they just kept coming every time I went to confession. So I ended up feeling pretty confident that some of those confessions were invalid because of 1 reason or another. So last week I did a general confession. Now please take this next thing I am about to tell you with a grain of salt. I have SYMPTOMS of ocd and scrupulosity. I really even hate to say that, because its like a red alarm goes off and I just get exempt. I will even tell you that I didnt even know that I invalidated a confession 2 confessions ago, and after I told the priest what I did, he told me that I did commit a sacrilege and I did invalidate that confession. So I should not say that I am scrupulous.
So I said a quick prayer to help me recall all my past sins and then I just said everything that came to mind. I spent probably over 2 hours with the priest. Maybe about an hour, hour and a half just saying everything that came to mind. Now, I worried about what I forgot. Its similar to everything I was going through since December, but I dont want to look back on that because I found big faults in some of my confessions. I know that we are forgiven for everything, but that we must confess any mortal sins that we fogot in the next confession. My problem is a couple things. One, the priest commanded me to not confess any more past sins after he absolved me. He didn’t give it to me as a pennance, but said that I would be commiting a mortal sin by disobeying him. I also thought he said that if hes wrong, then its on his soul not mine (That doesnt bring me much comfort either). And two, im not sure what I forgot. I have so many things that go in my head that make me so confident I forgot these particular sins, but I dont know. I find it a little strange that I probably confessed close to a hundred sins (Spitting out everything that came to mind for an hour, hour and a half), and its hard for me to even remember 10 sins that I confessed. I dont know if God deleted the ones that I confessed from my memory, or if ocd is doing it. I dont sit here and think for hours “what did I forget”. They just come and pop in my head. I have had many priest tell me to stop confessing past sins, but I just cant.
Any help would be really appreciated.
So I said a quick prayer to help me recall all my past sins and then I just said everything that came to mind. I spent probably over 2 hours with the priest. Maybe about an hour, hour and a half just saying everything that came to mind. Now, I worried about what I forgot. Its similar to everything I was going through since December, but I dont want to look back on that because I found big faults in some of my confessions. I know that we are forgiven for everything, but that we must confess any mortal sins that we fogot in the next confession. My problem is a couple things. One, the priest commanded me to not confess any more past sins after he absolved me. He didn’t give it to me as a pennance, but said that I would be commiting a mortal sin by disobeying him. I also thought he said that if hes wrong, then its on his soul not mine (That doesnt bring me much comfort either). And two, im not sure what I forgot. I have so many things that go in my head that make me so confident I forgot these particular sins, but I dont know. I find it a little strange that I probably confessed close to a hundred sins (Spitting out everything that came to mind for an hour, hour and a half), and its hard for me to even remember 10 sins that I confessed. I dont know if God deleted the ones that I confessed from my memory, or if ocd is doing it. I dont sit here and think for hours “what did I forget”. They just come and pop in my head. I have had many priest tell me to stop confessing past sins, but I just cant.
Any help would be really appreciated.