Grace & Peace!
It is a distinction that is clear from the usage. But I agree that most people would fail to see the distinction that does exist. All “gay” people are homosexuals. But not all homosexuals self-identify as “gay.” I’m not sure why you cannot grasp this simple point.
The question of belonging to a group is sometimes a tricky one. Generally, people belong to a group (whether they like it or not) when at least two of the following three criteria are met:
1–They exhibit the basic/objective characteristic(s) common to all group members (such as same-sex attraction in the case of “gay”).
2–They claim to belong to the group.
3–The group claims them as one of their own.
(Much to the chagrin of the “homosexual but not gay” crowd, they’re generally considered as belonging to the gay group because criteria 1 and 3 are met.)
Regardless, I understand the distinctions you make (gay-and-homosexual / homosexual-but-not-gay) very well and I’m happy to make them when appropriate: i.e., when A) it is important given the context of the discussion; B) it is important to the self-understanding of someone with whom I’m interacting; and C) it does not represent too much of a distortion of truth or reality. However, I also understand that those distinctions are not universally made and that they apply, for the most part, to a very particular religio-political subculture which is heavily represented on these forums.
But what we’re discussing is not so much whether Mr. Collins is gay-and-homosexual or homosexual-but-not-gay–what we’re really discussing is whether or not it is appropriate to apply these distinctions in a way which suggests that they are central to his story despite his own words which suggest that they are foreign to his own’ self-understanding.
In other words, the discussion is about who gets to determine the terms by which Mr. Collins can tell his own story.
You maintain that the terms by which his story should be understood are
your own terms with their (relatively) peculiar and parochial meanings and usages. I maintain that the terms by which his story should be understood are
his own terms and that those terms are identifiable by his own words.
So, for instance, you would say that because he identifies as “gay,” he must be endorsing a menu of sexual behaviors. I would say that because he identifies as “gay,” he is just indicating the drift of his affections because I find no evidence in his own words that “gay” to him means, “I endorse a menu of sexual behaviors.”
Your understanding is incorrect. Self-identifying as “gay” is an implicit endorsement of a certain lifestyle that accepts homosexual acts. Again, you are making a point of contention out of an issue that most would readily concede as beyond dispute.
Robert, that’s your politics talking and nothing more.
Coming out as “gay” is taking a position contrary to the Church’s teaching on: (1) sex outside of marriage; and (2) the immoral nature of homosexual acts. It’s not what “I would like it to mean.” It’s what most people understand it to mean.
Again, this is your politics talking. Coming out as “gay” does not universally mean taking a position contrary to the Church unless the person coming out makes it explicit that he/she is taking positions contrary to the Church. I think it’s only Courage, it’s apostles, and members of similar and sympathetic religio-politcal subcultures which would make the claims regarding “coming out” that you make–because those are the groups that teach that sort of understanding. It’s not taught in the catechism.
Again, I simply don’t understand what point you are trying to make here.
The point is this: who tells the most authentic and accurate version of Mr. Collins’ story–you or Mr. Collins? If I wanted to know how Mr. Collins understand his sexuality or the word “gay,” would I go to you, or would I go to Mr. Collins?
Are you saying that somehow a person can declare himself or herself to be part of a segment of the population that accepts a lifestyle that involves premarital sexual relations with members of the same sex, and at the same time be in full agreement with the teaching of the Church on these matters? The two positions are mutually exclusive.
You assume that Mr. Collins accepts a “lifestyle” contrary to Church teaching because he uses a particular word which means something to you but, arguably, does not mean the same thing to him. For me, I need more proof that he accepts or endorses a lifestyle contrary to Church teaching than just your word that your version of his story is the more accurate one.
I’m not reading any added meaning into his statements. I’m taking them at face value for what they are; an unapologetic endorsement of conduct that is defined by the Church to be immoral, whether he engages in it regularly or not.
Again, that’s your politics talking. You can’t seem to see beyond your own politics.
Under the Mercy,
Mark
All is Grace and Mercy! Deo Gratias!