"Girls should wear modest clothing"

[cymrocksmyworld]

I agree that girls should wear modest clothing at all times, but somtimes I am confused, because alot of guys I know say that, and then gape at models in magazines. A girl in a mini-skirt walks by and they stare and say “wow she’s hott!”
Girls want attention from guys. Not really this kind of attention, but it is hard to remember that, and we wind up settling for the bad attention.
I wish instead of just saying that girls should wear modest clothes, when guys are around “real girls” they would try to complement them on their God-given inner qualities instead of staring open mouthed at air-brushed pictures of models, which makes girls feel like they will never be good enough.

What do you think?

 

[brycelaliberte]

Those guys need to be slapped upside the head and stop being shallow. Otherwise, can’t really understand, cause I’m not one of those guys.

Although I will say there is definitely something much more beautiful about a girl who doesn’t need her reassurance of herself to be only superficial. The beauty on the inside will always work it’s way out than the beauty on the outside could ever work it’s in.

 

[MarieVeronica]

I think, often times… guys will make comments such as “Wow, that girl is hot”… to show off around their buddies. Often, these guys are young and immature. I would truly worry about an older man, making such a comment.

I remember my dear Dad (now deceased) telling me, when I was a young teenage girl… that a real man doesn’t respect a woman who dresses immodestly. I never forgot my father’s words of wisdom. He (along with my mother) taught my sisters and I… to always be respectful in our attire. Respect yourself, respect others (their feelings). And don’t be a cause of “scandal” in your clothing. When women dress immodestly, they are not only being disrespectful to their own bodies (Temples of the Holy Spirit)… but they may be causing “occasion of sin” to others, who have to look at them.

A woman can dress very femininely, without being immodest.

 

[richardwy]

What do you think?

Complaining about adolescent boys is useless.

 

[MarieVeronica]

Complaining about adolescent boys is useless.

Respectfully… I don’t buy into this “notion” for one moment. Adolescent boys are capable of holiness… just as anyone else. Two examples that come to mind…

St. Dominic Savio (died at age 15)
Blessed Francisco Marto (died at age 11)

The problem (at least in the United States) is that we think this way. “Boys will be boys”. Sure… if we allow them to. If we don’t train them how to be chaste and respectful of women… they will go along with all the filth that is out there.

Parents need to give special attention to their adolescent sons. Remind them, that God chose a woman… to be the Mother of His Son. If they learn early, the special dignity of women… they will learn to be chaste. God bless.

 

[BlaineTog]

Girls want attention from guys. Not really this kind of attention, but it is hard to remember that, and we wind up settling for the bad attention.

That is an amazing quotation. I will be relaying it to a friend of mine who desperately needs to remember what kind of attention she really wants.

Complaining about adolescent boys is endless.

Fixed.

 

[strngrnrth]

Complaining about adolescent boys is useless.

It’s not based on age. Men I have known are worst in their 30’s and low 40’s, if anything.

 

[ALLFORHIM]

Hi,
Im currently readin the book-Raisng a Godly daughter in an unGodly World by Vicki Courtney.

Every mother of a teen needs to buy one!!
Anyway she talks about this issue. The one thing that sticks out is that boys may say "She’s HOT!! and drool over a scandly clad dressed girl–BUT–he will never bring her home to meet mama:thumbsup:

 

[MarieVeronica]

It’s not based on age. Men I have known are worst in their 30’s and low 40’s, if anything.

Sadly, this is true. If the men are practicing Catholics… then, they need to read “The Theology of the Body” or any books by Jason Evert or Christopher West, on the subject (in fact, these books would be good for any God fearing man or woman to read, who struggles with chastity). Something to make them realize that there is more to life… than their hormones.

 

[Palomas]

A woman can dress very femininely, without being immodest.

I wholeheartedly agree and believe that it’s important that we Christian women model (no pun intended) elegant femininity to our younger sisters – which is very attractive but yet very modest… you know, something that will give them another alternative between the immodest clothing that is all to common and long skirts, no makeup and baggy shirts (which there is nothing wrong with per se, as long as one is not causing an occasion of sin in how she dresses). My point is that these young girls want to feel attractive and one of the ways to show them a way to do that is by dressing femininely yet modestly.

 

[mark_a]

I wish . . . . guys are around “real girls” they would try to complement them on their God-given inner qualities instead of staring open mouthed at air-brushed pictures of models, which makes girls feel like they will never be good enough.

What do you think?

This is God’s way of letting you know that these fellows are very immature.

 

[Newbie2]

Respectfully… I don’t buy into this “notion” for one moment.

The problem (at least in the United States) is that we think this way. “Boys will be boys”. Sure… if we allow them to. If we don’t train them how to be chaste and respectful of women… they will go along with all the filth that is out there.

Parents need to give special attention to their adolescent sons. Remind them, that God chose a woman… to be the Mother of His Son. If they learn early, the special dignity of women… they will learn to be chaste. God bless.

True, but the premise was that complaining about them won’t do much good. That’s true too. Dads and moms are wise to follow your suggestions.

It’s not based on age. Men I have known are worst in their 30’s and low 40’s, if anything.

Some never grow up.

The line is a bit finer in adult men as to how they express their feelings when seeing “eye candy”. There’s a proper way to express a girl’s/woman’s beauty, and there’s nothing wrong with expressing it in the proper manner. Such girls/women are a reflection of God’s perfection…and we men and boys need to keep that in mind.

Good point about “air-brushed” models…I understand it’s rare to see a “real” woman on the cover of a magazine anymore; lengthened necks, enhanced and reduced body parts, etc. have distorted the ideal of a “real” woman.

Sadly, as pointed out, there are faults on both sides; girls dressing like trollops to get attention and boys and men giving them that attention.

So, yes, girls should dress modestly regardless of what the boys say about the immodestly dressed girls. We guys need the help.

 

[MarieVeronica]

True, but the premise was that complaining about them won’t do much good. That’s true too. Dads and moms are wise to follow your suggestions.

Yeah, I understood what he meant. The poster felt it would do no good… to complain about the way boys (or even so called “mature” men) behave… when an immodestly attired girl or woman is before their eyes. That is the whole trouble with immodesty, in this day and age.

And you’re right. Women and girls do need to think about the kind of attention they’re going to attract… if they’re dressed immodestly. They need to remember that immodest attire… can be an “occasion of sin” for others. And besides, who really wants that kind of attention?

However, it is my feeling that a young man… who has been well trained by his parents, his teachers and his religious educators in the virtues of chastity and modesty… that young man will not react with “Wow, she’s hot”. If he has been trained in virtue… he will learn to lower his eyes and pray for the woman or girl.

Every human being (including adolescent boys ) are capable of learning and practicing virtue. But if we (society) continue to “make allowances” for bad behavior, then… we’re sunk.

God wants us all to be saints. So, we all (men and women) need to clean up our acts and learn to be chaste and modest.

 

[surfinpure]

It could be because of their problems with immodestly dressing girls that these guys are so insistent about modest standards for girls. I would consider it a protective measure. I’ve learned a lot about what goes through a guy’s head – even one who really wants to be chaste – when he’s confronted with immodesty.

We need to remember to have compassion on young men who know better, and want better for the women in their lives, but who are still struggling with overcoming the temptations that present themselves around every corner. Think about what it must be like to be a young Christian guy. You couldn’t go into a grocery store, or the mall, or to school, or even to church without stumbling upon sexually provocative images. They’re everywhere! Hardly any place is safe from these temptations. And even many good Catholic fathers are not teaching their young men how to resist these temptations, because they have never really learned either.

Let’s all pray for the men in our lives – of any age – to be given the grace to resist and avoid the snares of the devil. They need our help!

Most Sacred Heart of Jesus, have mercy on them.
St. Michael, protect them.
Immaculate Heart of Mary, pray for them. Amen.

 

[cymrocksmyworld]

Thanks everyone for your ideas! You have some good points. I think what I was trying to do was not complain, but say that I hope parents will teach their boys to appreciate the Godly qualities in a woman, because it makes it so much easier for girls to dress appropriately if they do.

 

[coda]

Isnt it just not cool when you are in church trying to be as holy as you can, and some teenaged floozy wearing flip flops, spaghetti strap half top and teeny pink shorts with “HOTTIE” emblazened on her rear, struts up for holy communion?..no respect…

 

[Gisella]

What modest and what’s not is so subjective though.

 

[surfinpure]

What modest and what’s not is so subjective though.

Oh, no. Here we go again.

 

[cymrocksmyworld]

I think whatever might cause an occasion of sin is immodest.
A cool book to read besides Theology of the Body is For Young Women Only

 

[ac23]

Pop culture is a huge enemy when it comes to modesty. Everyday we are bombarded with the wrong messages. Where are the role models who teach us self-respect and dignity?

We need to remember to have compassion on young men who know better, and want better for the women in their lives, but who are still struggling with overcoming the temptations that present themselves around every corner. Think about what it must be like to be a young Christian guy. You couldn’t go into a grocery store, or the mall, or to school, or even to church without stumbling upon sexually provocative images. They’re everywhere! Hardly any place is safe from these temptations. And even many good Catholic fathers are not teaching their young men how to resist these temptations, because they have never really learned either.

Let’s all pray for the men in our lives – of any age – to be given the grace to resist and avoid the snares of the devil. They need our help!

Most Sacred Heart of Jesus, have mercy on them.
St. Michael, protect them.
Immaculate Heart of Mary, pray for them. Amen.

Thank you! Yes, there are guys out there who struggle to remain pure and chaste. It helps to have like-minded friends who can respectfully discuss girls in a manner that reflects their status as God’s beloved daughters.