Giving money to charity in someone else's name

[ursuline1]

Instead of my sister giving my son a present she gives money to a charity in his name, and says that he will get credit from God as though he gave to charity. I am not sure if this is what happens, as it seems that charity has to come from the person himself, that he has to have the desire himself to give to charity. My son is a charitable person in his own right, and I am not sure if my sister shouldn’t just give to charity in her own name as she seems fit, as my son is not expecting presents anyway. He actually feels like somewhat of an imposter when he gets the letters from my sister telling him about the money she has given in his name.
I would appreciate thoughts on this, and especially if anyone would know what the Catholic church’s teaching on this would be.

 

[Fiasco]

Slightly tongue-in-cheek but, this way, the son has to put up with the string of begging letters which very quickly arrive after each donation! :

 

[Fiasco]

Slightly tongue-in-cheek but, by your sister’s doing it this way, does your son have to put up with the stream of begging letters which arrive after each donation?

 

[Brassring]

You should ask your sister if your son also gets the tax credit.

 

[pianistclare]

Maybe she thinks he doesn’t need anything.
It’s a nice gesture.
Don’t be critical of her for it. Someone is benefiting from the charity. That’s all that matters.

 

[Beryllos]

It is sweet of your sister to do this act of charity with your son’s salvation in mind. I agree with you that the “credit” is not directly transferable. On the other hand, your sister’s intention is like a prayer, asking God’s grace upon your son. Such prayers are heard by God and answered. In response, your son could pray for her, or even dedicate his own acts of charity to God for her benefit.

 

[pianistclare]

It is sweet of your sister to do this act of charity with your son’s salvation in mind. I agree with you that the “credit” is not directly transferable. On the other hand, your sister’s intention is like a prayer, asking God’s grace upon your son. Such prayers are heard by God and answered. In response, your son could pray for her, or even dedicate his own acts of charity to God for her benefit.

yes.

 

[Irishmom2]

Maybe she thinks he doesn’t need anything.
It’s a nice gesture.
Don’t be critical of her for it. Someone is benefiting from the charity. That’s all that matters.

Here, my friend is where we are going to disagree.

If she thinks he doesn’t need anything, don’t get him anything. But if it is a birthday or Christmas? Come on, it’s not about what he needs. A gift is sometimes frivolous or something a person **likes. ** Teacups, model kits, collectibles.

To give to charity in someone else’s name is not a gift except to the charity. The giver should just give to the charity and not tie it to someone else like they are killing 2 birds with one stone. I would rather someone get me nothing than give money to charity and call it my gift.

 

[pianistclare]

Here, my friend is where we are going to disagree.

If she thinks he doesn’t need anything, don’t get him anything. But if it is a birthday or Christmas? Come on, it’s not about what he needs. A gift is sometimes frivolous or something a person **likes. ** Teacups, model kits, collectibles.

To give to charity in someone else’s name is not a gift except to the charity. The giver should just give to the charity and not tie it to someone else like they are killing 2 birds with one stone. I would rather someone get me nothing than give money to charity and call it my gift.

Yeah, but if that were true, only material things would matter.
We give gifts of Masses for people…some gifts are not exactly tangible.
Like our friendship. :flowers:

Love you Irish.

 

[Mary_Estelle]

Two sides to this coin. The aunt is trying to be charitable in her own way and the son(and mother)reject the gift. A hungry man does not care where a piece of bread comes from as long as it staves off his(or her)hunger. The only thing that I might find issue with, is the letters to the nephew telling him that he has “given” because there is an element of vanity involved, whereas the aunt is seeking some recognition in “see, look what I did for you.” I may be wrong-I often am. Peace

 

[pianistclare]

Two sides to this coin. The aunt is trying to be charitable in her own way and the son(and mother)reject the gift. A hungry man does not care where a piece of bread comes from as long as it staves off his(or her)hunger. The only thing that I might find issue with, is the letters to the nephew telling him that he has “given” because there is an element of vanity involved, whereas the aunt is seeking some recognition in “see, look what I did for you.” I may be wrong-I often am. Peace

LOL

I actually think you are spot on this time!

It’s not the event, but the attitude of each person involved, in my view.

 

[Irishmom2]

Yeah, but if that were true, only material things would matter.
We give gifts of Masses for people…some gifts are not exactly tangible.
Like our friendship. :flowers:

Love you Irish.

Haha, but! Having a mass said **for me **is not the same as saying to my daughter that “I am having a mass said for Clare as your gift.” :knight2:

 

[pianistclare]

Haha, but! Having a mass said **for me **is not the same as saying to my daughter that “I am having a mass said for Clare as your gift.” :knight2:

Thanks! I’ll take it!
(Make sure they have good music)

 

[pianistclare]

If anyone here wants to have a Mass said for IrishMom as a gift to me, PM me.
I think it’s a CAPITAL idea!

 

[Irishmom2]

Thanks! I’ll take it!
(Make sure they have good music)

Sorry, but if I were going to have a mass said for you, (it could happen! ) it would be **your gift, **not my daughter’s. I can pretty much assure you the music won’t be good though.

But please let me know about any masses said for me as a gift to you!

 

[pianistclare]

Sorry, but if I were going to have a mass said for you, (it could happen! ) it would be **your gift, **not my daughter’s. I can pretty much assure you the music won’t be good though.

But please let me know about any masses said for me as a gift to you!

I’m on it!!!

 

[thistle]

Maybe she thinks he doesn’t need anything.
It’s a nice gesture.
Don’t be critical of her for it. Someone is benefiting from the charity. That’s all that matters.

I agree.