God Parents - Two Men?

[bsdman]

This past Sunday there was a baptism. I didn’t know the family, or anyone in it. I barely heard the (substitute) priest as he went through the usual baptism proceedings. That’s when I noticed that there were two men, dressed in coats and ties, that seemed to the “God Parents”, at least that’s how the preist addressed them.

In today’s scandel driven world, my immiadate thought was that these men were a gay couple and the priest is a super progressive liberal priest with a secular agenda. Or perhaps I am just unfamilair with the parameters of being a sponser, or God parent, is.

Which is it?

What would be the circumstances allowing two men to be addressed as the “God Parents” at a baptism?

 

[SMHW]

If there are two godparents (only one is needed), one must be male and one must be female.

It is possible that one man was a sponsor and the other a Christian Witness (a non-Catholic Christian) or that the other man was standing in proxy for an absent female sponsor. (I don’t know if there are rules about opposite sex proxies. Perhaps someone will let us know.)

One would generally think that if there is one Catholic sponsor and one Christian Witness that the parents would chose opposite sexes but I don’t think that’s an actual rule. Likewise if someone acts as a proxy. That makes sense for no reason other than to avoid the confusion that you experienced.

In practice, a priest will most likely use the word “godparents” in reference to both sponsors and Christian Witnesses.

 

[SeekerJen]

Rather than assume the worst of the family, the men, and the priest, perhaps you could consider the possibility that the two men were both uncles of the child. Perhaps the terminology used was incorrect. I believe that only one Godparent is required, if two are chosen they are to be one each, male and female, both Catholic. Others can be chosen to be Christian witnesses.

Perhaps each parent had a favorite brother and each wanted that brother to be a Godfather. Perhaps one parent had two brothers and didn’t want to choose. It’s not kind or Christian to automatically assume the worst of people, regardless of what kind of world we live in.

 

[Br.Rich_SFO]

This past Sunday there was a baptism. I didn’t know the family, or anyone in it. I barely heard the (substitute) priest as he went through the usual baptism proceedings. That’s when I noticed that there were two men, dressed in coats and ties, that seemed to the “God Parents”, at least that’s how the preist addressed them.

In today’s scandel driven world, my immiadate thought was that these men were a gay couple and the priest is a super progressive liberal priest with a secular agenda. Or perhaps I am just unfamilair with the parameters of being a sponser, or God parent, is.

Which is it?

What would be the circumstances allowing two men to be addressed as the “God Parents” at a baptism?

It would be a poor understanding of the theology of Baptism, and the symbolism of Godparents. The Canon Law that addresses this is clear that there should as far as possible at least one Catholic Godparent, there may be two one of each gender. However when it comes to a Catholic Godparent and a Christian Witness, this is where the confusion enters. The Canon Law says that along with a Catholic Godparent a validly Baptized Christian in good standing with their Christian Community, may act as a Christian Witness. It however does not specify the gender relationship. One would assume that it would be the same as that of the two Godparents, one male and one female. In other words the Christan Witness must be the opposite gender of the Catholic Godparent. The Godparent(s) and Christian Witness are a Spiritual family in the Baptism.

 

[jmcrae]

Strictly speaking, a child can only have two god parents (and only needs one) - a god mother and a god father. They have to be practicing Catholics over the age of 16, Confirmed, and not suffering under any kind of canonical penalty. (Homosexual couples are automatically excommunicated, so that leaves them out.)

Regardless of what words were spoken, only one of those men (at best) is that child’s god father.

 

[Br.Rich_SFO]

If there are two godparents (only one is needed), one must be male and one must be female.

It is possible that one man was a sponsor and the other a Christian Witness (a non-Catholic Christian) or that the other man was standing in proxy for an absent female sponsor. (I don’t know if there are rules about opposite sex proxies. Perhaps someone will let us know.)

One would generally think that if there is one Catholic sponsor and one Christian Witness that the parents would chose opposite sexes but I don’t think that’s an actual rule. Likewise if someone acts as a proxy. That makes sense for no reason other than to avoid the confusion that you experienced.

In practice, a priest will most likely use the word “godparents” in reference to both sponsors and Christian Witnesses.

The priest should address each with the proper title, to avoid the confusion and Christian Witness is not a non-Catholic Godparent, as many, many Catholics believe.

The Priest should also make it clear before the Baptism, maybe by an explaination in the bulletin that A was the Catholic Godparent and B was only standing in as proxy for the other Godparent who could not attend.

 

[NewUlm1976_2000]

This past Sunday there was a baptism. I didn’t know the family, or anyone in it. I barely heard the (substitute) priest as he went through the usual baptism proceedings. That’s when I noticed that there were two men, dressed in coats and ties, that seemed to the “God Parents”, at least that’s how the preist addressed them.

In today’s scandel driven world, my immiadate thought was that these men were a gay couple and the priest is a super progressive liberal priest with a secular agenda. Or perhaps I am just unfamilair with the parameters of being a sponser, or God parent, is.

Which is it?

What would be the circumstances allowing two men to be addressed as the “God Parents” at a baptism?

This is acceptable, I know of a few couples who chose two Godmothers for their child’s baptism.

 

[bsdman]

My guess is that they are brothers of the wife and husband. One of the men actually held the child during the readings, so perhaps he is the lone sponsor with the other man acting as the witness.

Coincedently, my wife and I are having her sister be the sponsor for our new born twin boys, and her husband, a non-Catholic Christian, act as the witness.

Here’s a question… can a Catholic (abstinent) but admittedly homosexual man act as a sponsor along with an abstinent admittedly lesbian non-Catholic Christian acting as a witness?

Pretty complicated stuff for the canan lawyers to figure out.

 

[SMHW]

The priest should address each with the proper title, to avoid the confusion and Christian Witness is not a non-Catholic Godparent, as many, many Catholics believe.

My point was, that I don’t think most priests or deacons bother to do this. They just use the word “godparent”. So a casual witness to a baptism would have no idea who is a sponsor and who is a Christian Witness.

The Priest should also make it clear before the Baptism, maybe by an explaination in the bulletin that A was the Catholic Godparent and B was only standing in as proxy for the other Godparent who could not attend.

You would think so…

 

[SeekerJen]

My guess is that they are brothers of the wife and husband. One of the men actually held the child during the readings, so perhaps he is the lone sponsor with the other man acting as the witness.

Coincedently, my wife and I are having her sister be the sponsor for our new born twin boys, and her husband, a non-Catholic Christian, act as the witness.

Here’s a question… can a Catholic (abstinent) but admittedly homosexual man act as a sponsor along with an abstinent admittedly lesbian non-Catholic Christian acting as a witness?

Pretty complicated stuff for the canan lawyers to figure out.

If they are indeed abstaining from sexual relations, why would they be any different from chaste single heterosexuals? If they take up their crosses and live chaste lives, why would the Church bar them from participating in the sacraments?

 

[kell0618]

This past Sunday there was a baptism. I didn’t know the family, or anyone in it. I barely heard the (substitute) priest as he went through the usual baptism proceedings. That’s when I noticed that there were two men, dressed in coats and ties, that seemed to the “God Parents”, at least that’s how the preist addressed them.

In today’s scandel driven world, my immiadate thought was that these men were a gay couple and the priest is a super progressive liberal priest with a secular agenda. Or perhaps I am just unfamilair with the parameters of being a sponser, or God parent, is.

Which is it?

What would be the circumstances allowing two men to be addressed as the “God Parents” at a baptism?

Hello,

Our son has two ‘Godmothers’ - what he calls them - though we are all clear (family, priest, both ladies, people present at his Baptism) that one woman (a dear friend and Catholic) is truly his Godmother and the other lady (a dear friend, Baptist) was the ‘Christian Witness’ present at the Baptism.

Why anyone would jump to so many conclusions about a sinful priest and a homosexual couple is beyond my grasp.

Some parents do not know of a faithful Catholic woman and a faithful Catholic man they find worthy of being Godparents. This was the case with my husband and I. We could have chosen a male and female who have no commitment to their Christian faith and would not help to raise our child in the faith, but we chose the contrary.

Peace be with you,

Kelly

 

[Br.Rich_SFO]

My guess is that they are brothers of the wife and husband. One of the men actually held the child during the readings, so perhaps he is the lone sponsor with the other man acting as the witness.

Coincedently, my wife and I are having her sister be the sponsor for our new born twin boys, and her husband, a non-Catholic Christian, act as the witness.

Here’s a question… can a Catholic (abstinent) but admittedly homosexual man act as a sponsor along with an abstinent admittedly lesbian non-Catholic Christian acting as a witness?

Pretty complicated stuff for the canan lawyers to figure out.

Being homosexual does not disqualify anyone from anything. (except the priesthood at this time)

 

[Br.Rich_SFO]

Hello,

Our son has two ‘Godmothers’ - what he calls them - though we are all clear (family, priest, both ladies, people present at his Baptism) that one woman (a dear friend and Catholic) is truly his Godmother and the other lady (a dear friend, Baptist) was the ‘Christian Witness’ present at the Baptism.

Why anyone would jump to so many conclusions about a sinful priest and a homosexual couple is beyond my grasp.

Some parents do not know of a faithful Catholic woman and a faithful Catholic man they find worthy of being Godparents. This was the case with my husband and I. We could have chosen a male and female who have no commitment to their Christian faith and would not help to raise our child in the faith, but we chose the contrary.

Peace be with you,

Kelly

So why not pick a Good Catholic Godmother OR Godfather, outside the family if necessary, and be done with it? Why even add the Christian Witness, especially a Christian Witness of the same gender?

 

[Phemie]

This is acceptable, I know of a few couples who chose two Godmothers for their child’s baptism.

Just because it happened doesn’t mean it’s acceptable. Other things I’ve known to happen: ‘Godparents’ who are neither Catholic nor baptized & non-baptized ‘Christian Witnesses’. When the Pentecostal & Salvation Army Churches are the two biggest congregation in town and most marriages are mixed marriages these things happen more often than we care to believe but that doesn’t make either practice right or acceptable. Canon Law is clear: 1 godparent of either sex or 2 godparents one male, one female.

 

[bpbasilphx]

**
In today’s scandel driven world, my immiadate thought was that these men were a gay couple and the priest is a super progressive liberal priest with a secular agenda.**

That you would make this assumption says more about you than it does about the gentlemen involved.

 

[kell0618]

So why not pick a Good Catholic Godmother OR Godfather, outside the family if necessary, and be done with it? Why even add the Christian Witness, especially a Christian Witness of the same gender?

Why? Because it was suggested to us as a possibility and we were unaware of the fact that only one Godparent was needed at the time.

We have no Catholic relatives.
We knew only one Catholic person who actually enjoyed being Catholic and attended Mass regularly and she was a coworker.
The Christian witness was a very dear friend who was very much like a part of the family - she was supportive through a difficult pregnancy and deliver, then helped with the baby when I suffered with horrible postpartum depression - was very much on fire for Jesus and even attended RCIA classes just so she could properly understand the Catholic faith and share it with our son.

That’s why.

 

[twosweetgirls]

Had this exact thing happen in my parish last Saturday! One of the godfathers was the brother of the baby’s mother, and I’m not sure who the other gentleman was. It was a wonderful Baptism.