godparent-divorced

[Shelleyx3]

I have 2 children now who do not have a godparent around due to divorce.
The first was a friend (female) who possibly committed adultery and is now divorced.
What would be her standing then, according to the church, in regards to my daughter’s godmother? Is she “void”? or since she made the vow in baptism and signed the document her godmother role stands.

And same for another one of my daughters; her godmother (a sister-in-law) committed adultery (homosexual mind you) and is divorced. My question for her too is the same as above…what would be her standing?

I now have 2 children with godmothers who are no longer a part of our family and have possibly (one for sure i know) committed a mortal sin. Neither are acting members of the catholic church.

How should I go forth with the daughters regarding the roles of their “godmothers”?

 

[1ke]

What would be her standing then, according to the church, in regards to my daughter’s godmother? Is she “void”? or since she made the vow in baptism and signed the document her godmother role stands.

Sponsor is a fact at the time of the baptism. The one or two people who stand witness to the baptism are the sponsors (if Catholic) and/or Christian witness to the baptism (non-Catholic together with a Catholic sponsor).

Sponsors are supposed to have a role in helping the parents guide the child in the faith. If they fail in that role, it is still primarily the parents’ responsibility. It is a shame if a sponsor does not fulfill their role, but not the end of the world.

Your daughter will be able to choose someone she wants as a sponsor for her Confirmation. Either the still-practicing original godparent or another person who is a role model in the faith.

My question for her too is the same as above…what would be her standing?

She was the sponsor at baptism. Nothing changes that.

Your interaction with her going forward may be limited or non-existent, so again, choose someone else to foster a spiritual relationship with your daughters who can be their Confirmation sponsors.

How should I go forth with the daughters regarding the roles of their “godmothers”?

You don’t. You simply close the door on that chapter, and move on. Find someone else who can act as a role model, someone who can be a good candidate for sponsor at Confirmation time.

 

[Shelleyx3]

Thanks all. That is pretty much what I have done. It’s a shame though. At one time I felt like it was my fault b/c of my choice of character for the godparent, but at the time things were different. Years have passed and things have changed. Not much I can do about how other people choose their actions.
I didn’t think about the sponsor in confirmation, but you’re right. But the good thing is their Godfathers will always be there and are practicing Catholics…thank goodness.

 

[otjm]

Thanks all. That is pretty much what I have done. It’s a shame though. At one time I felt like it was my fault b/c of my choice of character for the godparent, but at the time things were different. Years have passed and things have changed. Not much I can do about how other people choose their actions.
I didn’t think about the sponsor in confirmation, but you’re right. But the good thing is their Godfathers will always be there and are practicing Catholics…thank goodness.

Not to make too fine a point of it, but it seems to me there were maybe what - one or two passages in the Gospels where Christ forgave sinners?

Sorry, that may not be so polite. But I have yet to meet anyone who has not committed sin, and the odds are most of them at one point or another in their life have committed mortal sins.

And as I last recall, the Church seems to think that hating the sin and loving the sinner follows the Gospel Commands…

I can understand, having been a parent, that there are choices one needs to make about the people my children had contact with, and how extensive that contact was. And given the secular world to which teenagers are subjected, it is difficult to have enough influence with the child to counteract all they are inundated with in morals - or the lack thereof.

Divorce is not an issue that should be a separating point. Adultery is wrong, but how would the child know it had been committed unless they were told? And is it the parent’s job to inquire if the adulterer has gone to confession? Or not?

One may wish to protect a child from experiencing someone else who lives in a gay lifestyle, but at some point the exposure will occur, like it or not. How do you teach the Gospel command of hate the sin, love the sinner unless you confront the issue as the Church does?

Divorce is a fact of life, whether we like it or not. Something like about 25% of Catholic marriages end in divorce. And most of us have no real clue as to why and what happened; making judgments about it is at best a hazardous exercise. It would seem that the fact that someone went through one, without truly knowing all the facts, is a poor grounds for determining any future contact.

 

[Shelleyx3]

Well, this was my first “thread” question and I learned my lesson b/c I do not want to know what people’s opinions are on homosexuality, sin or divorce. I want to know what the church rule/law is on the matter. Since I cannot delete thread, I will be unsubscribing…if that is possible.

 

[Shelleyx3]

This was my first time asking a question on this public thread.
I learned my lesson.
Should have just asked my priest right off the bat.

Unsubscribing from thread…b/c I can’t delete it.