I find it weird how after half a lifetime of supposedly not having have any sexual thoughts at all (or romantic, or affectionate, or anything to do with desire), that after the ring goes on the finger suddenly you can switch it all on for the wedding night. Then there’s the whole grey area of whether you can actually be attracted to your spouse if you aren’t just about to have sex… I feel sorry for you people, from this point of view you can’t even enjoy pleasant thougts about your own husband or wife, and its all for the sake of some overbearing religiose paranoia.
Whoa … wait a minute here. At least let’s keep this in proper perspective!
No one said anything, nor does the church/Christ tell us that we cannot have “any sexual thoughts at all - romantic, affectionate or anything to do with desire”!
Of course we experience all those things!
It is keeping them in proper order as God designed (for our good and the good of children who logicially follow).
It’s called “self-control” - the world shuns it and created “birth control” (or more accurately “conception control” really).
We “feel” many things in life. Sometimes we “feel” like smacking someone who has insulted us or made us angry.
Sometimes we “feel” like cheating on something or someone.
Sometimes we “feel” like gorging ourselves with tasty food.
Sometimes we “feel” like giving in to any number of temptations there are in life.
That does not mean we OUGHT simply because that is how we are “feeling.”
All of those emotions and desires you mentioned are right and good.
They were designed by God for man and woman to be EXPRESSED within a sacramental bond called marriage.
And within that bond of marriage is where “authentic” love and intimacy is exchanged and grows.
Look around and see the fallout of “non-authentic” true self-giving love.
*Pregnancies out of wed-lock leaving children to grow up in unstable and usually low-income/poverty stricken homes without a father (typically).
*Sexually transmitted diseases (which are rampant)
*Abortion
*Broken spirits of those who gave themselves so casually to something that was NEVER intended to be “casual” In fact, it is the MOST intimate thing on the face of the earth. How profane so many have made it.
So keeping those emotions and desires in check and in proper order is really a PROTECTION for each of us.
(*Note: Sometimes incorrect information regarding this subject of sex and intimacy is posted. When you have a specific question to be answered I would recommend you post it in “Ask An Apologist” to get the correct and thorough answer. Also, I would highly recommend you read a book by Christopher West called, “Good News About Sex & Marriage”
If you want to argue against something, you will sound much more credible if you are able to back it up factually and know what you are talking about. These two sources will help as it is obvious your information is rather skewed in regards to the truth and the whole picture.)
God Bless!
), and both of these are good. But it is the failings of my own flesh, and the temptations of the Enemy that make for intensity of desire.
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