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Shoshana
Guest
Buy her a bouquet of spring flowers! 
Christ is risenâŚtruly He is risen!
Shoshana
Christ is risenâŚtruly He is risen!
Shoshana
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AlanFromWichita
Guest
I had a ton of âstuffâ that I couldnât let go of. My wife wanted for years to have a garage sale.
Then on Good Friday, âMother Natureâ took care of it for me by showing me that one way or other, I was able to let go of the junk.
This helps reinforce in my mind that when Jesus told the rich kid to sell his possessions and give to the poor, He wasnât trying to make a point about stewardship, but about attachment to material things. Youâd think Iâd be emotionally devastated about all this, but thereâs a certain freedom I have felt in all of this.
Alan
Then on Good Friday, âMother Natureâ took care of it for me by showing me that one way or other, I was able to let go of the junk.
This helps reinforce in my mind that when Jesus told the rich kid to sell his possessions and give to the poor, He wasnât trying to make a point about stewardship, but about attachment to material things. Youâd think Iâd be emotionally devastated about all this, but thereâs a certain freedom I have felt in all of this.
Alan
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Princess_Abby
Guest
Not to drift this thread, butâŚ
ALAN!!!
My goodness. I looked at those pictures and I am so sorry to hear of what happened. I hope your homeownerâs insurance is being helpful and doing what they should be doing. How traumatizing. I am assuming no one was hurt, and thank God for that!! I will pray for your family during this time!
Abby
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Giannawannabe
Guest
Alan, I hope everyone is all right. It certainly DOES send a powerful message regarding getting too attached to material things. God Bless. Youâre in my prayers.
God Bless
Giannawannabe
AlanFromWichita:
God Bless
Giannawannabe
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puzzleannie
Guest
demolitionman65 said:Yes, I am seeing this quite clearly now. Thanks for the additional advice!
try to think the way she is thinking abou this whole thing. put the good sturdy serviceable stuff in the kids room and family room, put new but good quality where it counts, having a bedroom pleasantly furnished is key to good sleep, and that is a health concern. If as it sounds like you have a traditional marriage her home is also her âofficeâ she spends 24 hours a day there and should have the primary say-so on how it is furnished, arranged and managed. If you are lucky she will give you a den or other nook of your own so you can keep your broken down ugly lazy-boy.
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puzzleannie
Guest
donât get carried away you may be shopping for a new crib before long.
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demolitionman65
Guest
No babies yet. . .seven is plenty!!
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pnewton
Guest
Last June we spent a few weeks shopping for new grill. My wife shows up with a picture of a crib and tells me this is what my grill money is going for. After eight years of trying, I am a daddy again. The little guy is helping me type as right nowwahuidbiv, nol
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Giannawannabe
Guest
Last June we spent a few weeks shopping for new grill. My wife shows up with a picture of a crib and tells me this is what my grill money is going for. After eight years of trying, I am a daddy again. The little guy is helping me type as right nowwahuidbiv, nol
[/quote]
CONGRATULATIONS!!!
God Bless
Giannawannabe
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CONGRATULATIONS!!!
God Bless
Giannawannabe
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Lorarose
Guest
Itâs wonderful to want to take JPIIâs words to heart.
Of course - the pope wasnât married to your wife either!
It sounds to me like she is a good woman who has worked hard - like you- raising a large family, and often doing without because of that.
If you cannot afford it - that is one thing.
If you can afford it - get her the darn furniture.
If momma ainât happy, ainât NOBODY happy!
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demolitionman65
Guest
pnewton. . . and congratulations!!!
and congratulations!!!Boy you got that right!!!
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AlanFromWichita
Guest
Thank you. Nobody was hurt worth mentioning.
Insurance company is being fantastic, the firemen did a great job of protecting my piano and paintings downstairs while others were upstairs with hoses.
Alan
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Princess_Abby
Guest
Alan,
Thanks for the update. I will keep your family in my prayers.
Demolitionman,
SoâŚwhatâs the word?
Any decisions?
Thanks for the update. I will keep your family in my prayers.
Demolitionman,
SoâŚwhatâs the word?
Any decisions?
K
KCT
Guest
Have you sat down to talk about how to afford a bigger house and new furniture? Does she have a clear picture of what it would take?
We could afford more than a townhouse if dh worked more hours or 2 jobs. I donât want that! He needs to be home. We have 19 yr old living room furniture. I donât like it, but w/ a kid going off to college in the fall, weâre stuck w/ old furniture for a while longer.
If you can afford something different (esp from a yard sale), let her shop. You may find that if she gets new (new to you!) furniture she may be happier about the house in general.
Also, does your wife have any time to herself? Does she get a few hours a week alone? Does she need a weekend away?
âKCT
We could afford more than a townhouse if dh worked more hours or 2 jobs. I donât want that! He needs to be home. We have 19 yr old living room furniture. I donât like it, but w/ a kid going off to college in the fall, weâre stuck w/ old furniture for a while longer.
If you can afford something different (esp from a yard sale), let her shop. You may find that if she gets new (new to you!) furniture she may be happier about the house in general.
Also, does your wife have any time to herself? Does she get a few hours a week alone? Does she need a weekend away?
âKCT
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msh
Guest
I admire you want to get an outside opinion. 
A lot of people would simply say âWhatever she wantsâ and a lot of others would say âPut your foot downâ. I think thereâs a compromise here.
You are absolutely not wrong for wanting to be economically minded, and willing to truly stretch the money in other areas of need. The money that could be spent on new, aesthetically pleasing furniture can be saved for a family trip, a necessary school expense, a needed car tune up, a church gift, anything. If there is usuable and durable furniture in the house, then by all means keep it!
If your wife would like to move to a larger space for elbow room, ask that she be willing to compromise on this. Save towards this new home, under the compromise that the furniture, as long as it is durable, lasting, and maintained, can be kept.
If it ainât broke? Donât fix it.
And of course, hereâs a compromise for you, too.
While you are saving for a newer home, perhaps other corners can be shaved just slightly? Maybe your wife and you could put that extra shaving of money into a âhome improvementâ fund, where you and your wife can both go together, pick out new or gently used adornments for the table, the closets, the cabinets. A fresh stroke of paint can revitalize a lot of things. A new piece of metal hardware in a bathroom can bright many things up. If your wife sews, maybe she can even take great pleasure in designing her own linens for the house, bringing it anew? Iâm a huge thrift-store addict, and I often find something that spruces up my well-loved furniture for as little as 50 cents.
It is indeed something to think about. I am so glad that you are such an image of sturdy control in your family. I admire that you are so mindful of typical American excess. Thank you for bringing your story to the Forum.
A lot of people would simply say âWhatever she wantsâ and a lot of others would say âPut your foot downâ. I think thereâs a compromise here.You are absolutely not wrong for wanting to be economically minded, and willing to truly stretch the money in other areas of need. The money that could be spent on new, aesthetically pleasing furniture can be saved for a family trip, a necessary school expense, a needed car tune up, a church gift, anything. If there is usuable and durable furniture in the house, then by all means keep it!
If your wife would like to move to a larger space for elbow room, ask that she be willing to compromise on this. Save towards this new home, under the compromise that the furniture, as long as it is durable, lasting, and maintained, can be kept.
If it ainât broke? Donât fix it.
And of course, hereâs a compromise for you, too.
While you are saving for a newer home, perhaps other corners can be shaved just slightly? Maybe your wife and you could put that extra shaving of money into a âhome improvementâ fund, where you and your wife can both go together, pick out new or gently used adornments for the table, the closets, the cabinets. A fresh stroke of paint can revitalize a lot of things. A new piece of metal hardware in a bathroom can bright many things up. If your wife sews, maybe she can even take great pleasure in designing her own linens for the house, bringing it anew? Iâm a huge thrift-store addict, and I often find something that spruces up my well-loved furniture for as little as 50 cents.
It is indeed something to think about. I am so glad that you are such an image of sturdy control in your family. I admire that you are so mindful of typical American excess. Thank you for bringing your story to the Forum.
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demolitionman65
Guest
Princess:
I told my wife that I got politely taken out to the woodshed by you guys (or mostly girls, as the case seems to be), and told her that if she is shopping thrift stores/yard sales, then OK.
We are in a better financial setting this year than we have been in almost ten years. . .so we do have some to spend on this.
Part of my fiscal conservatism springs from the fact that we have had to be so very careful these past ten years. . .I donât want our sudden wiggle room to be used up overnight.
msh, I asked for assistance because my wife and I do (perhaps uncommonly) quite well at checking with one another and coming to concensus before wandering off on large adventures (such as furniture purchases). Finding us at such determined loggerheads left me confused and concerned. . .and looking for outside help. CA seemed to be the good place to go.
I told my wife that I got politely taken out to the woodshed by you guys (or mostly girls, as the case seems to be
), and told her that if she is shopping thrift stores/yard sales, then OK.We are in a better financial setting this year than we have been in almost ten years. . .so we do have some to spend on this.
Part of my fiscal conservatism springs from the fact that we have had to be so very careful these past ten years. . .I donât want our sudden wiggle room to be used up overnight.
msh, I asked for assistance because my wife and I do (perhaps uncommonly) quite well at checking with one another and coming to concensus before wandering off on large adventures (such as furniture purchases). Finding us at such determined loggerheads left me confused and concerned. . .and looking for outside help. CA seemed to be the good place to go.
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msh
Guest
DM, I think you and your wife are pretty awesome for maintaining that checks and balances vibe. My boyfriend and I (not living together, or even live in the same state ) practice this mentality now, so we have a strong foundation for working with others, be it in family or in the workplace.
(All things get to be applicable when working with people, Iâve found. )
My boyfriend and I (not living together, or even live in the same state ) practice this mentality now, so we have a strong foundation for working with others, be it in family or in the workplace.(All things get to be applicable when working with people, Iâve found. )
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