Going to confession!?

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dove51

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Hi all. I’m going to go to confession this week, but I’m terrified. The last time I went (which was, ironically, the first!) was when I was 6 years old, and that was 10 years ago! My first experience wasn’t so informative, so I’m here lost about how to go about doing this.

I’ve heard that you start off by saying, “Bless me Father, for I have sinned. It has been _______ since my last confession?” Is that how it goes?

After that, then what? I know you need to go to confession before receiving the Eucharist, which is something I’m really missing.

Can anyone give me some tips on how to go about confessing? I’ve done so many bad things in the past, probably almost all the mortal sins imaginable. How does one go about confessing so many things in one session? Is this even possible?

Help? :confused:

Much thanks and love for reading this!
 
Thats a good question!!! I was Confirmed 2 weeks ago and I have been to Confession 3 times and every time I have been face to face. I would rather go with the screen up but I can’t remember how things are supposed to go…I know when I walk in I supposed to kneel and do the SOC, then say “Bless me Father for I have sinned”, then say how long it has been since my last confession. Then I say my sins and say these are my sins when I’m done. Now this is the part that messes me up; What does he say and what am I supposed to say from here on? I know at the very end he will absolve me from my sins and then I say an act of contrition, but when??? Before absolution or after??? Doesnt he say something at the end and then I respond with something else??? I really love going to recieve this Sacrament but I’m starting to get tired of having to go in and go face to face and say “This is only the 2nd time I’ve been to Confession so could you walk me through it??” I would like to go in and know what I’m doing…They really didnt talk about it much in RCIA…Thanks guys and if you have any websites that walk you through it that would be just as helpful too…God bless!!!
 
Dove,

You should begin by calling the parish priest and asking for a private confession time. Tell him the circumstances. It seems to me that he may want to do a general confession. He will know what to do.

I commend you for being brave and going after so long a time.

Good luck and God Bless You,
Winger
 
I googled to find out how when I went the first time, a couple of years ago. I can’t find what I found back then, but I printed it off. It says:

The priest will often begin with the sign of the cross or a greeting and blessing.
You begin by saying “Bless me Father for I have sinned, it has been ____ (number of days,weeks, months) since my last confession. These are my sins…”

State your sins

At the end you you say something to the effect of “For these and all the sins of my life I am sorry” so he knows you are done

The priest will give you your penance.

Then you say an act of contrition the one I printed off is " O my God I am heartily sorry for having offended Thee, and I detest all of my sins because of Thy just punishments. But most of all because they offend Thee my Go, who art good and deserving of all my love. I firmly resolve, with the help of Thy grace, to sin no more, and to avoid near occasions of sin. Amen.

He will then give you absolution.

Please correct me if I am wrong. 🙂
 
You guys are awesome, and so helpful. 👍 I feel much better. I don’t know if I’ll be able to do a face-to-face confession yet, but I think I am ready to do one behind a screen. God bless you all for helping me. 🙂
 
Winger said:
Dove,

You should begin by calling the parish priest and asking for a private confession time. Tell him the circumstances. It seems to me that he may want to do a general confession. He will know what to do.

I commend you for being brave and going after so long a time.

Good luck and God Bless You,
Winger
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There is only one kind of confession…a General confession is no different than a “regular” confession… hence every time someone goes into the confessional and confesses their sins they are do a general confession. I commend the person inquiring and going to confession during regular confession hours is perfectly OK .
 
dove51 said:
You guys are awesome, and so helpful. 👍 I feel much better. I don’t know if I’ll be able to do a face-to-face confession yet, but I think I am ready to do one behind a screen. God bless you all for helping me. 🙂
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I made a general confession face-to-face simply because I had written down my sins (and it was a looong list!), and it was too dark behind the screen to read it! :eek: Plus, I have bad knees, and no way could I kneel long enough behind the screen to go over the whole list. My priest was awesome – his first words after I finished were, “What a wonderful confession!” If your priest is even half as nice as mine was, don’t be afraid – go in there and “just do it!” I left that confessional feeling so happy to be rid of the weight of those sins. If you just tell the priest that you might need a little guidance, he should be glad to help you. It’s fine to go during the scheduled times, but if you have a really long list of sins, it might be better to make an appointment, for the sake of those in line behind you. You don’t have to tell him who you are, just ask him to meet you in the confessional at whatever time you agree upon and take it from there. You will be SO happy you went after all is said and done! God bless you.
 
I get really nervous when I walk into the confessional. Basically because I have a “mental list” of everything I have to say, but when I get in there, I’m like “Duh” 😛 I think I need to write a list and take it with me for next time.

Please know you are not alone. I went back to Confession after having been away for almost 5 years and believe me, it was awesome! 👍
 
THurifer2 said:
There is only one kind of confession…a General confession is no different than a “regular” confession… hence every time someone goes into the confessional and confesses their sins they are do a general confession. I commend the person inquiring and going to confession during regular confession hours is perfectly OK .
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This is incorrect. A regular confession is one in which one confesses all the mortal sins (and, if one wishes, venial sins) committed since their last confession. A general confession is done only sometimes. It consists of confessing the sins committed since your first confession (or since baptism, if baptised after attaining the use of reason). It is normally done, for example, when about to make a serious change in your life, such as join a religious or secular group, get married, etc. If is also done if you have made bad confessions for some time.

If you are becoming a Catholic you will need to make a general confession, and also if you are returning to the Church after an absence.
 
Joan_M said:
If you are becoming a Catholic you will need to make a general confession, and also if you are returning to the Church after an absence.
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THis is absolutely incorrect…Please provide citations for your information. When we make a good confession it is not different than a “general” confession. Its structure is exactly the same and the abolution is exactly the same. I know people that went to confession after decades and they did it at a communal pennance service. The whole concept of the “myserious” “general confession” makes it sound as though it is somthing different than a regular confession which it is not…it is just a term for a long confession. Some peoples weekly confession could be longer than others first confession in decades.

A general confession is It is made in the same manner as an ordinary confession, except that it requires more time and longer preparation which means it is no different.
 
Just in case you’re nervous (as I was in your situation way back when) I just wanted to add that you should always remember Confession is not a Sacrament of judgment and condemnation, but one of mercy, compassion, and love. There’s nothing to be afraid of :).
 
dove51 said:
Hi all. I’m going to go to confession this week, but I’m terrified.
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First, congratulations to you on wanting and deciding to go to Confession! I myself don’t go as often as I should, but it’s wonderful when I do, and I’m going to go more often.

I don’t know if you’re familiar with St. Faustina, but Jesus revealed to her his message of Divine Mercy (that’s where the Divine Mercy chaplet comes from). (For more information, go here: thedivinemercy.org/momm/) Jesus told St. Faustina that his mercy is immeasurable, and far, far more than all the sins of the entire world. He said he wishes to pour his mercy out upon souls, but they choose to ignore him or turn away from him, which he said hurts him far more than our sins. He told her to urge souls to receive the sacrament of confession, reminding them that the priest is just a “screen,” and that he himself is sitting there waiting for us to come to him for graces.

I get nervous going to confession too, but I’m trying to remember that Jesus already knows my heart, my sins, me. In going to confession I can show him that I trust him, which is the message of Divine Mercy: Jesus, I trust in you. ❤️

I’ll say a prayer for you as you prepare for confession. Private message me if you need anything. :crossrc:

God bless!
 
THurifer2 said:
There is only one kind of confession…a General confession is no different than a “regular” confession… hence every time someone goes into the confessional and confesses their sins they are do a general confession. I commend the person inquiring and going to confession during regular confession hours is perfectly OK .
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I beg to differ … A general confession is different. The priest asks questions based on the ten commandments and goes through your lifetime (since of course you made your first confession). It takes much more time than a regular confession. Someone who hasn’t been to confession in 10 years and has only been to confession one time, is going to need that kind of confession.

I don’t know about your parish but ours offers confessions only for 1 hour once a week. If someone goes in who hasn’t been there in 10 years, it is going to take a considerable amount of that hour. I have done both kinds of confession … they are very different.

Also in a general confession you can go behind the screen. Work it out with the priest … let him know what your needs are.

God Bless and again I think it is teriffic you are taking this step!!!
 
I do not understand this concept of a general confession where you confess all your sins since you made you first confesson. If God forgives all our sins in confession, why would one need or want to confess the same sins again once they have been forgiven? God forgets them, why should’t we. It is almost as if someone who goes to a general confession is not sure their sins are forgiven? There is no need to confess sins that were committed prior to your last confession. To me that sounds like denying God’s mercy and forgiveness.
 
I came back to confession after a long time too (although shorter that 10 years) and my first confession after that time was a little rushed and short (and during the normal confession times). I know that all my sins are completely forgiven, but I regret not saying my sins in a general confession. Sins are forgiven either way and that is the important thing. But the secondary benefit of confession is that it is so nice to get everything of your chest. After that long time, I suggest really scouring your conscience and trying to say all the mortal sins, or (like someone suggested) seeing a preist for general confession.
I’m so happy for you 🙂
 
dove51 said:
You guys are awesome, and so helpful. 👍 I feel much better. I don’t know if I’ll be able to do a face-to-face confession yet, but I think I am ready to do one behind a screen. God bless you all for helping me. 🙂
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Going behind a screen works just as well, some people prefer it. So don’t worry about that 🙂
 
THurifer2 said:
THis is absolutely incorrect…Please provide citations for your information. When we make a good confession it is not different than a “general” confession. Its structure is exactly the same and the abolution is exactly the same. I know people that went to confession after decades and they did it at a communal pennance service. The whole concept of the “myserious” “general confession” makes it sound as though it is somthing different than a regular confession which it is not…it is just a term for a long confession. Some peoples weekly confession could be longer than others first confession in decades.

A general confession is It is made in the same manner as an ordinary confession, except that it requires more time and longer preparation which means it is no different.
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I think YOU should do the research. Yes: a general confession IS different because it is a review of the sins of one’s entire life – including those that have already been submitted to the power of the Keys.

The OP is only 16. A general confession could be pretty short. But if he hasnl’t been to confession since he (or she) was SIX, then whether it is CALLED a general confession or not, that is what it will be.
 
Joannm said:
I do not understand this concept of a general confession where you confess all your sins since you made you first confesson. If God forgives all our sins in confession, why would one need or want to confess the same sins again once they have been forgiven? God forgets them, why should’t we. It is almost as if someone who goes to a general confession is not sure their sins are forgiven? There is no need to confess sins that were committed prior to your last confession. To me that sounds like denying God’s mercy and forgiveness.
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No it is not. It is an act of devotion, and while not strictly necessary, note that the OP was 6 at the time of his last confession. This WILL be a general confession, whether you call it that or not.
 
mercygate said:
I think YOU should do the research. Yes: a general confession IS different because it is a review of the sins of one’s entire life – including those that have already been submitted to the power of the Keys.

The OP is only 16. A general confession could be pretty short. But if he hasnl’t been to confession since he (or she) was SIX, then whether it is CALLED a general confession or not, that is what it will be.
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I talked to a canon lawyer on this very subject and the church recognizes only ONE form sacramental forgiveness and reconfessing absoved sins demonstrates a lack of understanding of the power of absolution which in fact is effective and permanent. Its not like they are extra double forgiven or somthing. Christ’s merits of death on the cross is what gives absolution its power…it works totally and effectively the first time we confess them.

Now then if i Go to confession and confess ALL of my conscious sins and a person goes to “general” confession and confesses ALL of their conscious sins could you please explain to me what the difference is…??? There are people here who may not have been to confession in a long time and you are implying that “regular” confession is not going to be “effective” enough (whatever that may mean) CONFESSION IS CONFESSION IS CONFESSION.
 
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