Guilt and Shame?

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Lilyofthevalley:
Are these good feelings?
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They are legitimate if they are the result of something that causes one to be guilty or ashamed.
 

They are legitimate if they are the result of something that causes one to be gulity or ashamed​

I have to agree, however what should one do after such feelings?
 
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Lilyofthevalley:

They are legitimate if they are the result of something that causes one to be gulity or ashamed​

I have to agree, however what should one do after such feelings?
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Repent, ask forgiveness and accept God’s mercy.
 
Hi Lilyofthevalley!

Guilt and shame could both either be good or evil. The moral value of an emotion always depends upon context. I don’t see you asking the same question about happiness, and yet even that would be an evil thing if I were happy over another’s misfortune.
 
*It depends on why someone is feeling guilt and shame, sometimes it’s a good feeling… *
If what you are indeed guilty of something shameful then it will help you to seek reparation…repentance… On the otherhand, sometimes scrupulosity can make us feel that way when we haven’t done anything to be/ feel shameful or guilty for…
 
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fix:
They are legitimate if they are the result of something that causes one to be guilty or ashamed.
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I once heard a priest friend of mine who also a psychologist (a wonderful, wonderful affirming priest) say guilt may be felt sometimes, BUT SHAME IS DIABOLICAL.
 
We often hear people saying that “education” is the answer to teenage pregnancy, drug abuse, and so on.

In Human Learning Theory, there are three realms:
  • Cognitive – thinking, logic. Reading, writing, and so on.
  • Pscho-motor – riding a bicycle, throwing a ball, and so on.
  • Affective – emotions and values.
Now if I told you I could teach someone trigonometry by having them thow a ball, you’d rightly say I was crazy. We all recognize you can’t achieve a cognitive goal using a psycho-motor strategy

Yet, somehow we think we can achieve affective goals with cognitive strategies! If we simply EXPLAIN that sex before marriage is wrong, or drugs are bad, that will work – and it never does.

If you want to reduce teenage pregnancy, drug abuse, and so on, you have to use an affective strategy. And that includes guilt, shame, pride, status, and so on.
 
According to the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders and psychoanalysts, the absence of guilt is a hallmark of the sociopath.
 
My understanding is that shame is guilt over yourself-like for being born, whereas guilt is well, guilt over what you have said or done…
 
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misericordie:
I once heard a priest friend of mine who also a psychologist (a wonderful, wonderful affirming priest) say guilt may be felt sometimes, BUT SHAME IS DIABOLICAL.
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Why? I guess it depends on how one is defining shame. If shame intends something to be regetted, how is that diabolical?
 
Guilt is the devils best weapon after you sin. You need to feel remorse for it, but don’t mope around for the rest of your life because you feel guilty. You did the sin, now ask for forgiveness, go to confesson and get over it. Don’t do it again.
 
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TCB:
What’s the difference between shame and humility?
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I do know humility is not as one nun and order I met thinks it means=that to be humble walk with you head down saying “yes father, no father” etc. NOT. Humility means first to recognize that God is the one leading your life=in charge. Second, CHARITY towards neighbor is next to this.
 
guilt and shame are the pricklings of our conscience - which is one of the ways that God speaks to us.

however, as with any part of us (esp our minds), our ‘guilt and shame’ producers can get out of whack - esp if they’ve been trained to see things as bad that aren’t.

for instance - if your … 1st grade teacher taught you that spelling the word ‘color’ with a ‘u’ in it was stupid and that you should be ashamed of it, then you might go accusing english people that they are horrible people and should be ashamed of the way they spell ‘color’.

so, while guilt and shame were given to us by God to help us make moral decisions, they can be ‘bent’, so to speak, and must be ‘straightened out’ again by comparing them to God’s standard (which consists largely of ‘love’) and allowing them to gradually become more like what He gave us.
 
What’s the difference between shame and humility?
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shame is the unpleasant feeling you have regarding some action you’ve taken (or some circumstance you find yourself in).

humility is seeing yourself in reality - with your strengths and your weaknesses.
 
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They are legitimate if they are the result of something that causes one to be guilty or ashamed.
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Not if the thing that casues the guilt or shame are morally acceptable.
 
Guilt and shame tend to lock people into the very thing they feel guilty about. It is effective for a person to know they have done a wrong thing but that they are a good person and should avoid doing it again.
 
It bugs me when celebrities who have left the church say “It’s my Catholic guilt…” to describe feelings they should be free of. If I have Catholic guilt, it’s because I’ve done something wrong and my conscience is not letting me forget it until I either stop the behaviour or repent. Guilt and shame are a good thing if they make you face the music.
 
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