Guilt & contraception

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Gavinsmama

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My husband & I have been practicing NFP for the last 5 years…our entire marriage! We have a sweet boy named Gavin who is almost 4. I was diagnosed recently with severe endometriosis which causes pain, heavy menstrual cycles, and infertility. I’ve had one surgery already but the endo has gotten much worse. My OBGYN advised us to make the pain go away to get pregnant (pretty difficult to do when endo causes infertility), go on continuous birth control for 3 months & then try & get pregnant, get a shot to put me into a chemical menopause, or a full hysterectomy.

I chose the continuous birth control. I’m 33 and we would like to grow our family God willing. I thought the other alternatives were way to drastic. I’ve never been on birth control before. It is working because my pain is much more manageable. I feel so guilty for taking birth control. I feel like I’m disobeying the Church. I feel so inadequate when going to mass and all my friends with their 4+ kids and I only have 1. I feel like they would shun me if they knew we were no longer practicing NFP and was on birth control. Any advice would be much appreciated!
 
I have never heard of someone going on the pill for 3 months to increase the chances of getting pregnant after. However, I am not a doctor. First, I would talk to a priest about the moral options.

As for your friends at church, your medical history is frankly none of their business. If they look down their noses at you,that is being judgemental and wrong of them

As long as you know you are following God’s will, that is all that matters

Angie
 
You are not contracepting and you are not “using birth control”.

You are taking horomones to treat a legitimate medical condition, and the side effect is temporary sterility. This is allowable under the Catholic principle of double effect.

I would suggest contacting the Pope Paul VI Institute, if you want a second opinion on the endo from a pro-life, NFP only physician. Na-pro solutions are effective at preserving fertility, treating the condition, AND staying away from hormonal pills that do not really fix the problem, but just mask it.
 
I have never heard of someone going on the pill for 3 months to increase the chances of getting pregnant after. However, I am not a doctor. First, I would talk to a priest about the moral options.

As for your friends at church, your medical history is frankly none of their business. If they look down their noses at you,that is being judgemental and wrong of them

As long as you know you are following God’s will, that is all that matters

Angie
My 28 year old was diagnosed with severe Endometriosis after endos were found on her appendix when it was removed. She has had one surgery to remove as many as they could and they also gave her the choices as to how to deal with continued regrowth. Since she is not married yet, she chose an implant, but was told that she should have children before 35 and immediately after her last child, a hysterectomy. When the endos have moved in to other organs, it can be dangerous. Her. CLOCK is ticking very loudly right now. I don’t want her to marry someone just to have children and not be in true love. She just started her first job as an attorney and has so much ‘stuff’ on her plate right now. Please never condemn a woman who takes hormones for this devastating condition. The. OP and all others with Endometriosis are in my prayers.
 
SICKNESS AND DEATH
1
Make friends with the doctor, for he is essential to you;*
God has also established him in his profession.
2
From God the doctor has wisdom,
and from the king he receives sustenance.
3
Knowledge makes the doctor distinguished,
and gives access to those in authority.
4
God makes the earth yield healing herbs
which the prudent should not neglect;
5
Was not the water sweetened by a twig,
so that all might learn his power?a
6
He endows people with knowledge,
to glory in his mighty works,
7
Through which the doctor eases pain,
8
and the druggist prepares his medicines.
Thus God’s work continues without cease
in its efficacy on the surface of the earth.
9
My son, when you are ill, do not delay,
but pray to God, for it is he who heals.b
10
Flee wickedness and purify your hands;
cleanse your heart of every sin.
11
Offer your sweet-smelling oblation and memorial,
a generous offering according to your means.c
12
Then give the doctor his place
lest he leave; you need him too,
13
For there are times when recovery is in his hands.
14
He too prays to God
That his diagnosis may be correct
and his treatment bring about a cure.
15
Whoever is a sinner before his Maker
will be defiant toward the doctor.
usccb.org/bible/sirach/38

Now, doctors are also Priests who can guide you spiritually in your decisions. We should balance what the secular community has to offer medically, and how our spiritual advisor can doctor us.

Most women who take BCP’s are healthy (fertile) and they take medicine to make them unhealthy (infertile); a paradox 4 sure! You are unhealthy taking into consideration what the doctor has for medicine. Spiritually, you need to make sure the Theology of he body does not become skewed to harm your marriage. Women may tend to become too focused on babies and men too focused on sex. So, in taking this medicine/surgery you need to balance sex so it still glorifies God and a healthly balance between giving and taking.
 
Please never condemn a woman who takes hormones for this devastating condition.
I think you totally misunderstood my post. I am not condemning anyone. I suggested she talk to her priest and if he does not see anything sinful in her situation she should take the pill and not worry about her friends at church judging her. Where did you get the idea I was condemning her???

I was simply shocked because it appears the doctor is suggesting that taking the pill for 3 months will increase her chances of getting pregnant after and I had never heard of that
 
Now, doctors are also Priests who can guide you spiritually in your decisions. We should balance what the secular community has to offer medically, and how our spiritual advisor can doctor us.

.
What the heck does THAT mean??? Doctors are priests??? Doctors can’t guide us spiritually!!
 
I think you totally misunderstood my post. I am not condemning anyone. I suggested she talk to her priest and if he does not see anything sinful in her situation she should take the pill and not worry about her friends at church judging her. Where did you get the idea I was condemning her???

I was simply shocked because it appears the doctor is suggesting that taking the pill for 3 months will increase her chances of getting pregnant after and I had never heard of that
I’;)m sorry, I was a little too liberal with that word ‘condemn’! The hormones are so out of control with this disease, that by using the artificial hormones for a few months and then stopping, the body is sometimes able to allow conception the hold the pregnancy. One again, please accept my mea culpa for a very unwise choice of words!
 
Taking hormones to limit the growth of endo adhesions is pretty standard treatment from what I’ve heard. I think her doctor wants to limit growth to help with conception and implantation. I took the pill for seven years due to extreme pain during my period (had endo symptoms but no diagnosis). Fortunately, pregnancy seemed to reset my system and I don’t have that kind of pain anymore, so I don’t need to take the pill now. Good luck in growing your family, OP.
 
What the heck does THAT mean??? Doctors are priests??? Doctors can’t guide us spiritually!!
“Doctors” technically is level of education not the task of the job. Priests obtain the status to be called “Doctor”. There are also “Doctors of the Church” like St Terese of Liseaux. catholic.org/saints/doctors.php

Take my above post and expand the meaning of doctor.🙂
 
Taking bc pills hinders/slows the growth of endo cells thus making it easier to get pregnant once off the bc pills if we start tring immediately after I finish my 3 months.
 
On a side note, me and a few friends have noticed that heavy consumers of artificial sweeteners (AS) are more prone to problems with fertility. Personally, I was a huge consumer of all the artificial sweetners (yellow, blue, & pink) and my period came frequent, lots of clots, pain, and stuff. I quit cold turkey, and immediately became healthy (fertility). Same with my BFF, except she was a month away from a historectomy. A few years earlier, my boss had a historectomy and she used much more than I did. There are a few more … I wish real studies about AS’s would surface … But fear the industry would just bury them for profit.
 
I’;)m sorry, I was a little too liberal with that word ‘condemn’! The hormones are so out of control with this disease, that by using the artificial hormones for a few months and then stopping, the body is sometimes able to allow conception the hold the pregnancy. One again, please accept my mea culpa for a very unwise choice of words!
Of course I accept your mea culpa. Thanks for explaining;)
 
Taking bc pills hinders/slows the growth of endo cells thus making it easier to get pregnant once off the bc pills if we start tring immediately after I finish my 3 months.
So bad the sounds of it, the pill is to help get pregnant. I am not priest but I would suspect that is an OK reason to use it. But again, I think it is best to consult your priest

ANgie
 
“Doctors” technically is level of education not the task of the job. Priests obtain the status to be called “Doctor”.
But medical doctors NEVER obtain the status to be called priest unless they go to the seminary and get ordained
 
I did the same thing. It is a licit use of BCP according to my Priest.

It is very common for women with endometriosis to take BCP for 3-6 months then try to get pregnant for a few months.

Good luck!

Posted from Catholic.com App for Android
 
Gosh, here is another stricktly medical consideration for you to examin in obtaining total well being. In the 2005 world health organization named the birth control pill as a group 1 carcinogen along side with radium, asbestos, & cigarette. 30% increase of breast cancer due to BCP. So, you may temporarily help one pain for another down the road. who.int/en/

Tough choices, but you should have the information.
 
My husband & I have been practicing NFP for the last 5 years…our entire marriage! We have a sweet boy named Gavin who is almost 4. I was diagnosed recently with severe endometriosis which causes pain, heavy menstrual cycles, and infertility. I’ve had one surgery already but the endo has gotten much worse. My OBGYN advised us to make the pain go away to get pregnant (pretty difficult to do when endo causes infertility), go on continuous birth control for 3 months & then try & get pregnant, get a shot to put me into a chemical menopause, or a full hysterectomy.
Look at the information at the Pope Paul VI Institute for the Study of Reproduction. You can contact them for help and an appointment. May God bless you and your dear family.

popepaulvi.com/

from their website: popepaulvi.com/ncfwh-evaltreat.htm#endo

Treatment
Different types of treatment may be needed for endometriosis:

Laser Laparoscopy
Spots of endometriosis can be removed from their abnormal locations by laser at the time of the diagnostic surgery. This procedure is often recommended for mild and moderate endometriosis. About 50-70% of patients can be treated by laser laparoscopy and can avoid major surgery. Removal by cautery is not recommended as there is an extremely high recurrence rate.

Laparotomy (major surgery)
In cases of severe endometriosis, it may be necessary to have major abdominal surgery. A laser is used in this procedure. With this procedure, you will be in the hospital for a few days and will need 4-6 weeks to recover fully. With surgical treatment, the actual chances of recurrence are low and, when there is recurrence, it is minimal.

Hormone Therapy
Hormone therapy is sometimes recommended as a treatment for endometriosis. The hormones treat the illness by stopping ovulation and have many side effects. They do not correct the problem.

The decision to have surgical treatment…
Many physicians use artificial reproductive technology and do not treat women with infertility by diagnosing and treating their endometriosis. These physicians have not developed the surgical skills necessary to meticulously remove the disease. Dr. Hilgers has been doing this type of surgery for over 30 years and offers expertise in finding and removing spots of endometriosis. He has found endometriosis in 95% of patients who, in a prior laparoscopy by another physician, were told that they did not have endometriosis.
 
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Gavinsmama:
I chose the continuous birth control…it is working because my pain is much more manageable. I feel so guilty for taking birth control. I feel like I’m disobeying the Church.
You’re taking this medication to help with your endometriosis, right? You’re not taking it to control birth but rather to deal with this serious problem, right? Well, then you’re fine. Don’t feel guilty. It’s called the “principle of double effect”, which means if you take a medication primarily for a medical condition and it just so happens to work as birth control, too, then you are not guilty of contracepting. 🙂
 
I would suggest contacting the Pope Paul VI Institute, if you want a second opinion on the endo from a pro-life, NFP only physician. Na-pro solutions are effective at preserving fertility, treating the condition, AND staying away from hormonal pills that do not really fix the problem, but just mask it.
I second this recommendation.
 
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