Guilt of a Catholic Upbringing

[Leebo]

While browsing the religous forum on another website, there was a thread in which a couple of posters talked about guilt they felt. The put the cause of this guilt on their Catholic upbringing. Other posters discussed this as if it were a common phenomanon and that it was a very negative thing (yet another) about the Catholic Church.

I have heard this before, but I don’t have any understanding of what they are actually talking about. Have any of you heard this before? What are they talking about? Is this just more anti-catholicism urban legend type stuff?

I will try to link a thread I started over at the site. Is that allowed here??

I am still new to this site. Joined about a month ago and have only posted a couple of times, but hope to be more active in the future as I so far have been pleasantly surprized by the quality of content in some of these forums.

 

[LilyM]

While browsing the religous forum on another website, there was a thread in which a couple of posters talked about guilt they felt. The put the cause of this guilt on their Catholic upbringing. Other posters discussed this as if it were a common phenomanon and that it was a very negative thing (yet another) about the Catholic Church.

I have heard this before, but I don’t have any understanding of what they are actually talking about. Have any of you heard this before? What are they talking about? Is this just more anti-catholicism urban legend type stuff?

I will try to link a thread I started over at the site. Is that allowed here??

I am still new to this site. Joined about a month ago and have only posted a couple of times, but hope to be more active in the future as I so far have been pleasantly surprized by the quality of content in some of these forums.

They’re probably talking about guilt over things they want/wanted to do that the world reckons are perfectly healthy and OK but which the Catholic church teaches are sins. Most people who leave the Catholic church over one or other of the things it teaches are wrong decide that the guilt they feel about doing such things is also wrong and unhealthy.

Question should be why on Earth did they ever expect NOT to feel guilty about sin? Shouldn’t we ALL feel guilty about sin? Isn’t fear of the Lord (which includes a healthy dose of guilt over sin) the beginning of wisdom? And why should majority opinion/society/their own wishes decide what is sin (and worth feeling guilty about) and what isn’t?

 

[blessedtoo]

I wouldn’t call it an “urban legend”. I was raised on the east coast right smack in the middle of pre and post Vat II. Coming from an Italian Catholic family, there was guilt aplenty. In addition, the sisters that ran the Catholic grade and high schools in my neck of the woods were, well, less then “enlightened” when it came to early childhood behavior and psychology. I could tell you stories - oh my. But I’ve put that all behind me now.

Couple the school experience with a home experience that rivalled that of Carrie White’s in the movie CARRIE and you have some idea of crippling guilt. I come from a family richly steeped in religious superstition and the idea that if you scare a child nearly to death, they will obey both the parent and God. It only works for a very short time. Thankfully, most parents realize this to be a very ineffective method of catechizing children.

I carried my resentment against the Church into my 40’s. Thankfully, God crashed through my thick walls of rage and tore them down. I am now at peace with the past and understand why and how it happened as it did. I have an adult perspective of God now and am no longer imprisoned by the myths and superstitions of my childhood.

Many folks who still bemoan the “guilt” of their Catholic upbringing are still locked into a childish view of their faith and their relationship to God. People are a lot more willing to work on their relationships with other people but suggest they put in the time and effort on their relationship with their Creator? They may look at you like you’re a kook.

 

[Leebo]

They’re probably talking about guilt over things they want/wanted to do that the world reckons are perfectly healthy and OK but which the Catholic church teaches are sins. Most people who leave the Catholic church over one or other of the things it teaches are wrong decide that the guilt they feel about doing such things is also wrong and unhealthy.

Question should be why on Earth did they ever expect NOT to feel guilty about sin? Shouldn’t we ALL feel guilty about sin? Isn’t fear of the Lord (which includes a healthy dose of guilt over sin) the beginning of wisdom? And why should majority opinion/society/their own wishes decide what is sin (and worth feeling guilty about) and what isn’t?

Yes, I was thinking along the same lines. Below is a copy of my post.

I haven’t been on these forums much lately but even back when i was a daily reader I never saw a post by anyone who had any idea of what they were talking about when it came to the Catholic Church.

I get frustrated when people comment so negatively about something they have spent almost no time researching or trying to understand. While reading another thread the subject of Guilt was brought up. This guilt was apparently due to a Catholic upbringing and by the tone of the posts (there were more than one) was a very negative thing.

The Guilt attributed to a Catholic upbringing is hard to comment on other than a case by case basis. This “guilt” has become common in the lexicon of anti-Catholic literature.

Hopefully those who suffer from Catholic Guilt will participate in this thread and share what exactly they feel guilty about.

One way to explain some of this ‘guilt’ may come from some basic tenants of Christianity.

Here are a couple of examples.

Proverbs 1:7 The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge, but fools despise wisdom and discipline.

Proverbs 9:10 The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom and knowledge of the Holy One is understanding.

Matthew 7:13-14 Enter through the narrow gate. For wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction, and many enter through it. But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life, and only a few find it.

For Christians, Matthew 7:13-14 is a very uncomfortable passage. It says that only a few will make it through the gates of heavan but many will enter through the gates of Hell. Alot of “conventional” thinking about Christianity is that as long as you don’t sin too badly and are basically kind to people then you have nothing to worry about. The Matthew passage seems to challange that notion.

I grant you this will mean nothing to an athiest, but for Christians it calls for a more serious investment and sacrifice than is conventionally taught in Christian Churches.

The Catholic Church actually believes Mat 7:13-14 and tends to err on the side of caution when it comes to care of human souls.

If those with a Catholic upbringing start to feel guilty about living a selfish pleasure seeking lifestyle that Hollywood and the vast majority of mainsteam media portry as “normal” and healthy, then I don’t understand why Christians would consider this a bad thing.

Believing in God enough to actually fear him is to open the first door to understanding the truth about everything.

 

[Leebo]

I wouldn’t call it an “urban legend”. I was raised on the east coast right smack in the middle of pre and post Vat II. Coming from an Italian Catholic family, there was guilt aplenty. In addition, the sisters that ran the Catholic grade and high schools in my neck of the woods were, well, less then “enlightened” when it came to early childhood behavior and psychology. I could tell you stories - oh my. But I’ve put that all behind me now.

Couple the school experience with a home experience that rivalled that of Carrie White’s in the movie CARRIE and you have some idea of crippling guilt. I come from a family richly steeped in religious superstition and the idea that if you scare a child nearly to death, they will obey both the parent and God. It only works for a very short time. Thankfully, most parents realize this to be a very ineffective method of catechizing children.

I carried my resentment against the Church into my 40’s. Thankfully, God crashed through my thick walls of rage and tore them down. I am now at peace with the past and understand why and how it happened as it did. I have an adult perspective of God now and am no longer imprisoned by the myths and superstitions of my childhood.

Many folks who still bemoan the “guilt” of their Catholic upbringing are still locked into a childish view of their faith and their relationship to God. People are a lot more willing to work on their relationships with other people but suggest they put in the time and effort on their relationship with their Creator? They may look at you like you’re a kook.

Thank you for sharing. Wouldn’t the kind of thing your describing be present in housholds across the spectrum of Christianity? What is so “Catholic” about your experience? I think you hit a big point by mentioning Catholic Grade Schools, I experienced some of the “old school” nuns and found these experiences to be somewhat tramatic and I too was away from the church from my teen years till recently coming back in my late 30s.

I guess most of the guilt I feel is healthy and is leading me towards a spiritual growth that in the end will be to my great benefit.

 

[LilyM]

Thank you for sharing. Wouldn’t the kind of thing your describing be present in housholds across the spectrum of Christianity? What is so “Catholic” about your experience? I think you hit a big point by mentioning Catholic Grade Schools, I experienced some of the “old school” nuns and found these experiences to be somewhat tramatic and I too was away from the church from my teen years till recently coming back in my late 30s.

I guess most of the guilt I feel is healthy and is leading me towards a spiritual growth that in the end will be to my great benefit.

I don’t know that it is uniquely Catholic. I suspect a lot of people could say the same about, for example, the British public school (which term confusingly refers to the private boarding school) system - a lot of intense bullying, often from staff as well as students,which can doubtless be quite traumatic.

 

[blessedtoo]

Thank you for sharing. Wouldn’t the kind of thing your describing be present in housholds across the spectrum of Christianity? What is so “Catholic” about your experience? I think you hit a big point by mentioning Catholic Grade Schools, I experienced some of the “old school” nuns and found these experiences to be somewhat tramatic and I too was away from the church from my teen years till recently coming back in my late 30s.

I guess most of the guilt I feel is healthy and is leading me towards a spiritual growth that in the end will be to my great benefit.

I can’t speak to that question in general, but specifically I can tell you that all the non-Catholic friends I had during my formative years were certainly NOT subjected to the type of religious guilt that I was. I think it was also partly due to the fact that most of them attended public schools. Whatever religious instruction they received happened though their parents and their Church, but not reinforced daily by religious sisters for whom charity and mercy were nothing but a theory.

I know that my situation was not unique but I also know that is does not represent ALL Catholic experience. My sisters, both older, have the same memories and some far worse. I know that the east coast, particularly the tri-state area, was particularly “behind the times” when it came to understanding the best way to handle small children. I know that our schools were deluged during the baby boom years with more kids than the aging nuns could handle and that most of them had very little education or training to manage classes that exceeded 40 kids. Since I moved to the west coast 17 years ago, I know that many Catholics here had totally opposite experiences from me and remember fondly their Catholic education and their family interactions.

I surely don’t think it’s fair to generalize on this topic by claiming that this very real, and very inapproriate guilt is some knee-jerk reaction to Catholic morality and rules. In first grade, at the tender age of 6, I can assure you I was not interested in engaging in immoral behavior, as I battled constant nausea and stomach pains from the fear I had of Sister Cecilius and her 2 foot ruler.

 

[blessedtoo]

They’re probably talking about guilt over things they want/wanted to do that the world reckons are perfectly healthy and OK but which the Catholic church teaches are sins. Most people who leave the Catholic church over one or other of the things it teaches are wrong decide that the guilt they feel about doing such things is also wrong and unhealthy.

Question should be why on Earth did they ever expect NOT to feel guilty about sin? Shouldn’t we ALL feel guilty about sin? Isn’t fear of the Lord (which includes a healthy dose of guilt over sin) the beginning of wisdom? And why should majority opinion/society/their own wishes decide what is sin (and worth feeling guilty about) and what isn’t?

No, Lily. The question should be why on earth would a child of 7 be belittled in front of the class by a nun because she wore the wrong color socks? Why should this child be told hell was her final destination for such an infraction?

Please don’t minimize the very real experience that many, many Catholics have had either through the transforming religious education system of the 60’s or the generation of parents who raised those children with a less than stellar understanding of their faith.

 

[Leebo]

I can’t speak to that question in general, but specifically I can tell you that all the non-Catholic friends I had during my formative years were certainly NOT subjected to the type of religious guilt that I was. I think it was also partly due to the fact that most of them attended public schools. Whatever religious instruction they received happened though their parents and their Church, but not reinforced daily by religious sisters for whom charity and mercy were nothing but a theory.

I know that my situation was not unique but I also know that is does not represent ALL Catholic experience. My sisters, both older, have the same memories and some far worse. I know that the east coast, particularly the tri-state area, was particularly “behind the times” when it came to understanding the best way to handle small children. I know that our schools were deluged during the baby boom years with more kids than the aging nuns could handle and that most of them had very little education or training to manage classes that exceeded 40 kids. Since I moved to the west coast 17 years ago, I know that many Catholics here had totally opposite experiences from me and remember fondly their Catholic education and their family interactions.

I surely don’t think it’s fair to generalize on this topic by claiming that this very real, and very inapproriate guilt is some knee-jerk reaction to Catholic morality and rules. In first grade, at the tender age of 6, I can assure you I was not interested in engaging in immoral behavior, as I battled constant nausea and stomach pains from the fear I had of Sister Cecilius and her 2 foot ruler.

You were able to find you way back to the Church despite such a negative beginning. If you ever get the time I would enjoy hearing about how you made it back.

 

[thomfra]

While browsing the religous forum on another website, there was a thread in which a couple of posters talked about guilt they felt. The put the cause of this guilt on their Catholic upbringing. Other posters discussed this as if it were a common phenomanon and that it was a very negative thing (yet another) about the Catholic Church.

I have heard this before, but I don’t have any understanding of what they are actually talking about. Have any of you heard this before? What are they talking about? Is this just more anti-catholicism urban legend type stuff?

I will try to link a thread I started over at the site. Is that allowed here??

I am still new to this site. Joined about a month ago and have only posted a couple of times, but hope to be more active in the future as I so far have been pleasantly surprized by the quality of content in some of these forums.

At least when I was brought up, it was all based on guilt. They make you feel guilty before you even know what you are feeling guilty about. Probably better in the long run to focus on improving oneself morally and ethically than focussing on the past.

 

[KingAlfred]

While browsing the religous forum on another website, there was a thread in which a couple of posters talked about guilt they felt. The put the cause of this guilt on their Catholic upbringing. Other posters discussed this as if it were a common phenomanon and that it was a very negative thing (yet another) about the Catholic Church.

I have heard this before, but I don’t have any understanding of what they are actually talking about. Have any of you heard this before? What are they talking about? Is this just more anti-catholicism urban legend type stuff?

I will try to link a thread I started over at the site. Is that allowed here??

I am still new to this site. Joined about a month ago and have only posted a couple of times, but hope to be more active in the future as I so far have been pleasantly surprized by the quality of content in some of these forums.

Yes, I definitely know all about this. I have always had the personality flaw of voluntarily accepting responsibility for the problems of others out of a profound sense of Christian humanity. This has actually hurt me, emotionally and psychologically, by generating tons of unreasonable guilt over not being able to ‘rescue’ people. At this point in life, I know I must be compassionate, but at the same time psychologically healthy. There should be a balance.

 

[Ridgerunner]

Some famous person or other said that if we all got our just deserts, we would all be shot at sunrise.

Maybe I’m just getting old, but it often seems to me that guilt can be a healthy thing. Oh, I’m sure there are pathological states for that, as there are for everything. I know a guy irons his underwear after laundering it. He knows it’s OCD, and he knows it serves no useful purpose, but he does it anyway.

We are told that, on our day of judgment we will be surprised and mortified when we see the true, unvarnished nature of what all we have done. And when we do, we won’t be able to stand it, and will cast ourselves into hell if we do not find it in ourselves to accept God’s mercy unconditionally. No argument, no excuse. “Yes, I did do that, and yes, it was just that bad. But yes, I will accept your forgiveness and your love, though it’s painful for me to own up to my total unworthiness, and I have to flatten my own vanity, which I now see as huge, to accept your forgiveness and love, and I will.”

This puts me to mind of a short story I once wrote (Don’t worry, I’m not going to impose it on you here.) I recall that my grandmother, the widow of a railroad engineer, knew that hoboes (there were a lot of them once) had somehow marked her house, as hoboes were known to do, because they would walk straight to it from the “hobo jungle” for a handout, ignoring all others on the way. But she wouldn’t allow us grandchildren to hunt for it or get rid of it if we accidently found it. She figured it was, in a sense, a cross she willingly bore (she fed a lot of them, and some were pretty scary) for a particular sin she had committed long ago; one of uncharity. Most of us would think little of what she did…She never actually said that was the one, but she spoke of the event in a particularly profound manner and it had a symmetry with feeding the hoboes. In a strange way, then, she was happy with the mark, just as she was placid in accepting the residuum of whatever burdens of guilt she bore, even for a forgiven sin, committed long ago. For her, I do believe, it was like seeing Jesus coming up the walk, again, and again, and again, in strange and often offputting visage, and she didn’t want to see Him go away forever and leave her without her particular cross. The mark was, in her mind, I think, a sort of blessing, a fortuitous gift, and her guilt was a grace that caused her to leave the mark intact. A marvelous symmetry. Notwithstanding that one “quirk” of hers, she was an astoundingly well-balance personality. Very, very wise. I often think of guilt as being like the “Hobo’s Mark” which, of course, was the title of the story. And, in retrospect, I think my grandmother’s retaining her guilt was exceedingly well-balanced and wise. Not many of us, I think, reach that level of understanding.

 

[blessedtoo]

Some famous person or other said that if we all got our just deserts, we would all be shot at sunrise.

Yes, and, metaphorically speaking, I would say that this can also apply to the mentally disturbed and over zealous nuns that were responsible for much of the abusive “guilt” inducing tactics that I endured.

Maybe I’m just getting old, but it often seems to me that guilt can be a healthy thing.

Probably not so much for a 9 year old girl who is told that she is a “whore” because she stepped over the line between the boy’s and girl’s playground.

We are told that, on our day of judgment we will be surprised and mortified when we see the true, unvarnished nature of what all we have done. And when we do, we won’t be able to stand it, and will cast ourselves into hell if we do not find it in ourselves to accept God’s mercy unconditionally. No argument, no excuse.

Yes, I am wondering if Sr. Cecilius, Sr. Loretta Anne, Sr. Goodshephard, and Sr. Raphael had such a moment of “enlightenment” at the moment of their passing.

Maybe I’m alone here, but it seems to me that some are confusing appropriate guilt with the kind of crippling, unhealthy, bordering on abusive guilt that often carries over into young adulthood from a childhood of terrorization. In fact, I can argue that when a small child is made to feel guilt about absolutely EVERYTHING, it becomes much harder to discern true appropriate guilt as one enters into adulthood. The prevailing wisdom becomes: “if I’m gonna go to hell for talking to the child in the next row, why not do the really bad stuff and have some real fun?”. If forgetting your beanie twice in the whole school year is a capital crime against God and your fellow man, what chance will you ever have of making it to Heaven?

 

[thomfra]

Some famous person or other said that if we all got our just deserts, we would all be shot at sunrise.

Maybe I’m just getting old, but it often seems to me that guilt can be a healthy thing. Oh, I’m sure there are pathological states for that, as there are for everything. I know a guy irons his underwear after laundering it. He knows it’s OCD, and he knows it serves no useful purpose, but he does it anyway.

We are told that, on our day of judgment we will be surprised and mortified when we see the true, unvarnished nature of what all we have done. And when we do, we won’t be able to stand it, and will cast ourselves into hell if we do not find it in ourselves to accept God’s mercy unconditionally. No argument, no excuse. “Yes, I did do that, and yes, it was just that bad. But yes, I will accept your forgiveness and your love, though it’s painful for me to own up to my total unworthiness, and I have to flatten my own vanity, which I now see as huge, to accept your forgiveness and love, and I will.”

This puts me to mind of a short story I once wrote (Don’t worry, I’m not going to impose it on you here.) I recall that my grandmother, the widow of a railroad engineer, knew that hoboes (there were a lot of them once) had somehow marked her house, as hoboes were known to do, because they would walk straight to it from the “hobo jungle” for a handout, ignoring all others on the way. But she wouldn’t allow us grandchildren to hunt for it or get rid of it if we accidently found it. She figured it was, in a sense, a cross she willingly bore (she fed a lot of them, and some were pretty scary) for a particular sin she had committed long ago; one of uncharity. Most of us would think little of what she did…She never actually said that was the one, but she spoke of the event in a particularly profound manner and it had a symmetry with feeding the hoboes. In a strange way, then, she was happy with the mark, just as she was placid in accepting the residuum of whatever burdens of guilt she bore, even for a forgiven sin, committed long ago. For her, I do believe, it was like seeing Jesus coming up the walk, again, and again, and again, in strange and often offputting visage, and she didn’t want to see Him go away forever and leave her without her particular cross. The mark was, in her mind, I think, a sort of blessing, a fortuitous gift, and her guilt was a grace that caused her to leave the mark intact. A marvelous symmetry. Notwithstanding that one “quirk” of hers, she was an astoundingly well-balance personality. Very, very wise. I often think of guilt as being like the “Hobo’s Mark” which, of course, was the title of the story. And, in retrospect, I think my grandmother’s retaining her guilt was exceedingly well-balanced and wise. Not many of us, I think, reach that level of understanding.

Interesting story. But did she need to have the anguish of guilt to do the christ like thing and feed the hungry?

The story shows how you can use something negative and channel it into something postive though…

 

[Ridgerunner]

Yes, and, metaphorically speaking, I would say that this can also apply to the mentally disturbed and over zealous nuns that were responsible for much of the abusive “guilt” inducing tactics that I endured.

Probably not so much for a 9 year old girl who is told that she is a “whore” because she stepped over the line between the boy’s and girl’s playground.

Yes, I am wondering if Sr. Cecilius, Sr. Loretta Anne, Sr. Goodshephard, and Sr. Raphael had such a moment of “enlightenment” at the moment of their passing.

Maybe I’m alone here, but it seems to me that some are confusing appropriate guilt with the kind of crippling, unhealthy, bordering on abusive guilt that often carries over into young adulthood from a childhood of terrorization. In fact, I can argue that when a small child is made to feel guilt about absolutely EVERYTHING, it becomes much harder to discern true appropriate guilt as one enters into adulthood. The prevailing wisdom becomes: “if I’m gonna go to hell for talking to the child in the next row, why not do the really bad stuff and have some real fun?”. If forgetting your beanie twice in the whole school year is a capital crime against God and your fellow man, what chance will you ever have of making it to Heaven?

I cannot, of course, know what your experiences were. Nor am I able to say what was “typical” of school nuns long ago. Obviously, a nun calling a 9 year old girl a “whore” as you described, is completely out of line. I, myself, never heard anything remotely resembling that sort of thing, though I did consider some who taught me rather tough. But such occasions as you describe would have been reported to the parish priest, who would have spoken to both the teacher and the student and done much to rectify it.

It did seem to me, on some occasions, that some nun or other was excessive. I also know how we students regarded such occasions, which was to recognize them as abnormal and wrong. There were also occasions in which some nun or other would do something extraordinarily kind and helpful. Certainly, I cannot know how some of the students would have been affected by the excessive conduct, but I only know of one of my contemporaries who purport to have been negatively affected.

I went to a public high school. One of my male teachers and one of my female teachers had sex with students, and we all knew that too. It is impossible for me to know for sure how any of the students were affected by it.

As between the nuns who taught me and the laypersons in public school who taught me, I consider the nuns more clearly sane and moral.

 

[rvrateri]

Coming from a Protestant back ground I can tell you, there is just as much guilt.
I am in the conversion process right now. I need to go through the RCIA.
Guilt…Guilt…This is the first time in my life where I know I can go somewhere and get rid of the guilt…Believe me, I have done plenty of things in my life that are contrary to Catholic teaching…But I have a place to go to confess my sins and know that my sins are forgiven. I think of Jesus on the Cross shedding his blood for me. I think of His mother’s suffering watching her Son die and I say thank you. Receive forgiveness freely and go and sin no more. And if we sin, we know if we go with a pentatent heart, our loving Father will forgive us our sins and our loving Mother will open her arms for us. There is no lingering guilt. (A little guilt is good to bring us to the confessional.

TFlanders

 

[JimG]

Coming from a Protestant back ground I can tell you, there is just as much guilt.

Yes, I don’t think the laying on of guilt is unique to Catholicism. A friend of mine often tells me of being taken to his rather fundamentalist church with his family. The preacher literally thundered out imprecations and threats of hellfire, often causing him to nearly jump out of his pew. Unfortunately it turned him off of all religion.

I went to Catholic school taught entirely by nuns in the old days; but really had no bad experiences. Only one of the nuns–my 4th grade teacher–seemed to be a little off her rocker, but she didn’t saddle me with guilt. Even at that age I figured that some people were just a little nuts. But all the rest of the nuns were kind, loving and helpful.

 

[RobHom]

Interesting story. But did she need to have the anguish of guilt to do the christ like thing and feed the hungry?

I don’t think she “needed the anguish of guilt” …sounds more like she may have used the memory of something she could have done differently and regretted not doing it differently…and was in her own way atoning for the past…so as to not have it happen again? Am I “splitting hairs here”?

The story shows how you can use something negative and channel it into something postive though…

Yes, very much so…

On the subject of “nuns”…ahhh, Sister Mary Joseph, my Latin teacher in High School… The only one I didn’t like much. Someone somehow figured out she and I were 3rd cousins or something like that…beats me how…I had never heard of her before…but she had to tell everyone in that class we were related and she spent the entire year proving her “impartiality”.

I can’t say that Catholics have anymore guilt than anyone else. I have Jewish relatives and friends who talk about “Jewish Guilt”, and frankly its about the same thing. Seems to primarily stem from their mother…(sorry ladies)…but I have to be honest here. My mother was a good one for laying a “guilt trip” on you…and she could do it with the best of them. She would mix in religion to make it even “heavier”…so my point is that its not necessarily “___________ Guilt” (fill in the blank with denomination of choice) but more “familial guilt” wielded as a weapon by one parent or another using every trick at their disposal.

 

[rwoehmke]

I can’t help but be sympathetic to the Sisters who taught us before Vatican II happened. Compared to todays teachers many of them particularly when starting out were relatively uneducated. That being said I have to comment that many of our Public School teachers today are educated, but unlearned.

My feelings pre-Vatican II were basically of overwhelming guilt. Between my Mother who my cousins say was a fanatic Catholic and the Sisters I could have been described as feeling extremely unworthy. God was in no way a loving Father, he was watching for that moment of mortal sin to zap me into hell. I think part of it was feeling compelled to actively do all the little pius practices we were taught and not doing well at it. I was convinced every little slip was surely a mortal sin. (scrupulosity) When Vatican II came along and a lot of those things were deemphasized I became so very angry at the Church for those things that I was bent on leaving. Fortunately I was a good friend of our pastor at the time and he said that the minute I disagreed with something in one of the other local churches they would cast me out. Within certain limits the Catholic Church allowed the practice of many different forms of spirituality and the “tent was big.” The other thing was that none of the other denominations, upon examination, seemed particularly attractive.

 

[Polaris]

I think there is Catholic Guilt, but it is not actually part of our religion but a misunderstanding of what our religion teaches. My Great Aunt was raised and adult all before Vaticant II. When she had a historectomy due to complications of her third pregnancy, she told her husband that they could not have sex anymore because it would be a sin. The poor man never had sex again. because she and him were so affraid of sin. Imagine a couple not as strong as them, the guilt they would feel if they did have sex, due to the misunderstanding of Catholic teaching. This idea cant exsist in most protestant minds because marriage was about union to them and considered a good thing, yet in Catholicism sex remained bad even after marriage.
My mother went out with her friends one summer completely forgeting what day it was, friday, and she had a piece of pizza with pepporoni on it, took a bite and when she remebered she spit it out instantly. She confessed and the Father came down on her saying she was going to hell for such insolence and that she was a horrible person. It did not even make the requirements of Mortal sin but there the priest was telling her it was. She was terrified even after confession and she wondered if she was forgiven.
My mother was even taught in school that dancing was a horrible sin, because St Vianney said so and that to be beautiful was also a sin because it was vannity. These were not actual teachings of the church but the Catholic culture teached them like they were.
A friend of mine around 30 was educated in Argentina even had some experience like this in her own lifetime. A nun told a class of five year olds that God kills those that sin, so you better not sin, this right after her baby brother died. She went home crying and asked her mother what sin her baby brother commited that God would kill him. This again is not part of Catholic teaching but it has become part of the basic understanding of it. Our culture twisted the teaching in such away that even things that are not sins became sins, and venial sins become mortal sins. Then on top of that most believe that you can only be forgiven in the confessional, so if you sin one day and cant make it to confession that day you have all this guilt and the fear that if you die you will go straight to hell. Then we have purgatory which cause more fear because many understand it as proof that you have not really been forgiven and must pay for sins. Again not what the church teaches but what the Catholic culture understands it to say. Thats what I think they mean by Catholic guilt.