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phil8888
Guest
What would you say to a male friend who says he has a really good gf but he wants a girl with bigger breasts or something?
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flyingfish
Guest
That if big breasts are absolutely necessary for him to be attracted to the woman, and his current gf is not interested in implants he should stop wasting her time and his time and move on.
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LotusCarsLtd
Guest
I try not to make those type of distinctions. One they’re not the most important aspect and two…well, frankly, things sag as time goes on…
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GorgerCracker
Guest
“Grow up.” Those would be my exact words. I would consider a male friend who said that laughably immature… Then again, I am a woman.
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Magickman
Guest
It is very common for both men and women to have specific physical requirements for a date or a mate. Height, weight, hair, musculature, dentition, etc.
This is in addition to economic, social, political, religious, and familial requirements.
None of these things guaranty freedom from misalliance, though.
The interior characteristics matter much more. Character, values, goals, integrity, kindness, affection, and personality are the things that count.
This is in addition to economic, social, political, religious, and familial requirements.
None of these things guaranty freedom from misalliance, though.
The interior characteristics matter much more. Character, values, goals, integrity, kindness, affection, and personality are the things that count.
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flyingfish
Guest
I’m also a woman, but I would not judge a man who absolutely had to have a big breasted partner. If that’s who he is, and if large breasts are necessary for him to be attracted to a woman then there is no point telling him to grow up. He might change his preferences, but he might not.
As a woman I prefer tall and muscular men. Does that make me immature, or honest about what I’m attracted to? I don’t think I could ever be attracted to a man who was shorter than I am and overweight, I just don’t see it happening.
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CatofAlexandria
Guest
My question is: why did he decide to date this girl in the first place if he’s not physically attracted to her?
Usually the physical attraction aspect serves as a kind of weeding out mechanism in dating, since that’s the first thing that you can recognize about a person. If he is indeed physically attracted to her, but would improve upon this one aspect alone, I’d say, yes, he has some growing up to do. Of course, there are lots of physical qualities in our spouses/significant others that we would like to change. As of late, my husband is balding up top. Would I prefer that he keep his hair? Of course. Does it make him any less attractive to me on the whole? No. I love him–I always will.
He will never find a girl that he cannot make individual improvements on. But, he should find a girl that takes his breath away.
Usually the physical attraction aspect serves as a kind of weeding out mechanism in dating, since that’s the first thing that you can recognize about a person. If he is indeed physically attracted to her, but would improve upon this one aspect alone, I’d say, yes, he has some growing up to do. Of course, there are lots of physical qualities in our spouses/significant others that we would like to change. As of late, my husband is balding up top. Would I prefer that he keep his hair? Of course. Does it make him any less attractive to me on the whole? No. I love him–I always will.
He will never find a girl that he cannot make individual improvements on. But, he should find a girl that takes his breath away.
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GorgerCracker
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He’s already attracted to her. She’s his girlfriend.
I have a lot of preferences too, but I wouldn’t stop dating someone I really liked just because he had blond hair and I prefer black hair. That would be silly. And if I did dump a good man for such a trivial reason, I wouldn’t blame anyone for calling me immature.
Of course, if he finds her repulsive, then he should dump her… She’d be better off with someone who found her attractive. But I don’t think that is what Phil was saying.
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flyingfish
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I guess you’re right, I seem to have misread a very short OP.
But I guess he’s not saying he’s going to stop dating her either, just that he wants her to have bigger breasts. I think it’s normal. If you were with a blond guy you really liked, wouldn’t you still prefer it if he had black hair?
If he dumped her over the size of her breasts, then it just means it was really important to him in a relationship. I don’t see the point of judging that. Who are we to say what can be a deal breaker and what can’t?
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presidentjlh
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If the friend is willing to end a relationship over his girlfriend’s lack of enormous breasts, I gotta agree with Gorger.
Look, I’m an 18-year-old guy. Don’t get me wrong, I want to find a girl that is very “hot” (so to speak) I admit, it’s a fault. I don’t want to lust or anything. But physical attractiveness is definitely the first thing I notice. I hope that I grow out of this as time goes on.
But, even if I met the most gorgeous girl: Beautiful face, great, sexy figure, you know, “the works”, and she was somehow interested in me (average, slightly overweight me…like that would ever happen
), if she didn’t like my faith (She wouldn’t have to be Catholic. It would be a plus, but if she’s Protestant but is perfectly fine with my Catholicism, I’d be cool with it), wasn’t kind to others, was a liar, was promiscuous, or anything like that, I’d have to say, “Sorry, sweetheart, you look great, but looks alone does not a great relationship make.”Now, if I were to meet the most gorgeous girl, and she was Catholic, was true and devout to the Faith, was kind, smart, funny, and loving, and she thought I was “boyfriend-material” I would hold on to her for dear life
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GorgerCracker
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Well, if it were a blond guy I really liked, I think blond might eventually become my new favorite hair color by positive association.
I think it’s normal if he still has a preference for large breasts. I don’t think people can alter what they find attractive consciously or anything, and I’d never blame a guy for liking big breasts anymore than I’d blame him for liking redheads with freckles. I just think if he lets a little thing like that become a deal breaker, he has a lot of maturing to do. However, it’s a free country. If he wants to leave her for another woman, no one can stop him.
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JerrySeibert
Guest
Find someone more mature.
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sanctamaria17
Guest
I could say I prefer tall men, of Mediterranean descent, with thick dark hair and dark eyes…but I’ve fallen for blond, blue-eyed boys, boys with green eyes, red hair, brown hair, boys of every ethnicity…skinny guys, shorter guys, built guys…It’s his heart that matters. If he’s kind, strong (character wise), patient, gentle, sensitive, makes me laugh, affectionate, intelligent, prayerful, musical, and whimsical, that’s what matters to me.
Grow up. You’ll change, she’ll change, especially when she births babies and breastfeeds (or, even if she doesn’t, age will change her). Health changes, bodies changes. Your character is what matters.
Grow up. You’ll change, she’ll change, especially when she births babies and breastfeeds (or, even if she doesn’t, age will change her). Health changes, bodies changes. Your character is what matters.
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chevalier
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That he needs to manage his relationships better. We aren’t talking about a new friend who’s attracted to him, we’re talking about someone who is already his girlfriend. She’s the same girl he made his girlfriend. I wonder if there aren’t other issues or if the girlfriend isn’t simply not so spectacular to him because, otherwise, would he really care about a specific detail?
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PatriceA
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As a woman, I’d first be shocked and then probably offended and then I’d probably wish him “good luck with that.” That is an awful shallow way of looking at a potential mate. And if he really thought his girlfriend was a good girlfriend, he’d no longer be thinking in those terms because it wouldn’t matter anymore what she has or doesn’t have as far as physical beauty goes. I’d be wondering if he was trying to find a reason to dump her.
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MtnDwellar
Guest
Before I start dating a woman, she must meet or exceed my MBR’s - Minimum Babe Requirements
I know that sounds rather piggy. They are not super model requirements. It just means that the other person has to meet at least a minimum level, appearance wise. I know that there are incredibly wonderful women who I will miss out on because they fall short. There are also incredibly wonderful women who clear the bar.
I know that sounds rather piggy. They are not super model requirements. It just means that the other person has to meet at least a minimum level, appearance wise. I know that there are incredibly wonderful women who I will miss out on because they fall short. There are also incredibly wonderful women who clear the bar.
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mommamaree
Guest
It would be one thing if he just found bigger breasts attractive. But I highlighted the part of the statement where you said ‘he wants’ because I think that is a problem. As an example, my husband really likes red hair on a woman. I have black hair. Is there a problem there? No, because I know he likes how I look, and he just happens to think redheads are pretty. I can be confident that he doesn’t ‘want’ a woman with red hair. Wanting something other than the one you are with is a deal breaker, though. If I knew that my bf (assuming I was not married) wanted a woman with bigger breasts, I would feel hurt. First because I felt reduced to my inadequate cup size, and second because his thoughts would lead me to believe that he is having lustful thoughts about other women. I would probably break up with him over that information. If that is so important to him, then I would deserve to find someone who loved me for me, and he should go look for a woman who has bigger breasts.
FWIW, women with small breasts prior to their first pregnancy are often quite surprised about their eventual cup size, even after their babes are weaned. Breast size will often increase permanently after the first baby. But then, their abs are not as tight anymore, so that would become less attractive…oh well.
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MtnDwellar - I think the difference is, you would not begin dating someone that didn’t meet your requirements. In the OP, he already has a girlfriend, but wants someone else with bigger breasts. I imagine, based upon your previous posts at CAF, that you could still be friends with girls you were not attracted to, and could behave charitably toward them, even if they are not ‘dating material’ (for lack of a better phrase). Similarly, I am very tall, and so I was only attracted to taller men like my husband. I make no apologies for that, and neither should you. But I can still be friendly to men that I do not consider attractive (based upon my preferences, not objectively). That was the issue I had with the original question. Your attitude is totally fine and healthy, IMO.
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spirit4life
Guest
ADVICE? - There will always be ‘the other woman’ with yet bigger breasts (ie, your friend must have never read Solomon in the bible - it’s there for a reason! 
); your friend is in for a very-unhappy life if he maintains that parameter at the overriding-top of his partner-picker!
); your friend is in for a very-unhappy life if he maintains that parameter at the overriding-top of his partner-picker!Mary_Gail_36
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Thus, doing his current GF the incredible favor of having Mr. Shallow out of her life!
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Rascalking
Guest
It’s not just being shallow. While I agree with you that focusing JUST on physical is deeply shallow, men are more attracted to the physical than women are.
I’d say to him, “If you look at it that way, your in for a life of misery.”
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