But how can I say it? He was “grim”. I had to bring my 14 mo. old DD. in with me and cracked a joke. “Don’t worry, we don’t have to worry about her breaking the seal of the Confessional!” He barely grinned. He also kept his head down and his hands folded in front of his face the WHOLE time- moving them slightly when talking. He never looked at me.
Next his advice was merely legalistic. The same kind of stuff I already know and the same stuff I read here. Conditions for mortal sin, occasions of sin- just catechism stuff. I know that stuff- that’s not what I need in confession- I need real advice or scripture or. . . something. . . . Something a real person would tell another person.
He just seemed like he was not comfortable- just “grim.” Does this make sense? I chalked it up to age and experience. Also I am a psycho-therapist so human interaction is really important to me.
What do you guys think?
Are the new priests taught to be so “tight”? Being conservative doesn’t mean you have to be grim right?
Personally, for me, confession is very special. I think it is like Mass - we take out what we put into it. If you could really not avoid taking your child in the confessional then that is acceptable. I don’t think that it is good to treat confession with a lack of reverence. It is a great blessing.
The priests prepare well for confession and they do not take it lightly even when they joke during confession. A couple of years ago the priest who had been my confessor for a couple of year passed away. He use to tell jokes that really embarrased me at Mass because I really burst out laughing. During my last confession with him, I told him that I miss him giving Mass and his jokes. In a very firm and solemn tone and looking at me straight in the eyes, he said, but, you do know they are expressing a message? I said; of course father. I did know, but, they were still hilarious. It’s fun and healthy to get a good laugh every once in a while. Sometimes, the best way to transmit a message is with a joke or a smile.
However, the confessional is the confessional. We must approach it with reverence. The priest is in persona christi. To me, the advice given in the confessional is as it comes from Our Lord Jesus himself. I treasure every word spoke and if how it applies to me is not immediately evident or if I don’t think it is the best thing, well - I pray and ask God to help me to understand. The confessional is not joke. I have received the blessing of accepting the wisdom given to me at all my confessions.
Once, a priest adviced me not to go to church every day during the week. A custom I continued although I no longer worked next door to the cathedral. It was interfering with my duties and responsibilites. At firs, of course, it seemrd an unreasonal advice from a priest. But, I obeyed, for almost a whole year. It wasn’t easy. I missed being in the presence of Our Lord. It was very, very, difficult. I offered it up. But, I did come to clearly see my error and how I was not balancing my life. Now, I go when I can and have taken care of some of life’s priorities due to my duties and obligations.
I would say, treasure the advice given to you at the confessional. It is very precious and it is specially for you. Present yourself with reverence and prepare before hand and pray. remember, come what may, the priest is in persona christi.
It is not a theraputic center nor an online bible study course. You really don’t get to pick and choose in there. It is a sacrament.
God bless,
Abba
) when I managed to notice that it was a mission priest in the confessional and I thought to welcome him to the parish during my last confession.