Hand-Holding Explained

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Hand holding was never introduced from the Church in my parish. It leaked in as from a rusty pipe, one from which I do not drink. Same with holding hands up in the orans position - I keep my eyes forward and try not to notice those who are copying the priests’ postures (in violation of the rubrics).
 
I think we joined hands at our parish until a flu epidemic. And then the hand-holding kind of stopped.
 
I first ran into it in the late 70s/early 80s. It was one of several times I actually had to go outside to check the sign to see if I was in a Catholic Church. It struck me at the time as very cult-like. Less so now, but it’s still grating–in the Our Father, we are praying to God individually. Holding hands is the wrong symbolism for this occasion. I do not, and will not, participate.

And needless to say no priest has ever talked about it in a sermon, nor have I ever seen a bulletin article about it.
I did have a conversation with my parish priest about several things, and this came up. He agree with me that it was the wrong symbolism for the prayer, but he didn’t feel he needed to do anything about it.
 
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It was one of several times I actually had to go outside to check the sign to see if I was in a Catholic Church. It struck me at the time as very cult-like.
The first time I saw it at Mass I thought, hold on - what is going on here? I don’t remember this when I was little.

I find it…odd. My apologies to anyone who likes it.
 
I believe it was introduced to my parish by a previous priest. He liked the symbolism and wanted everyone to hold hands as a sign of unity and love. Successive priests haven’t forbade it and usually it’s just some of the families who hold hands during the prayer. It doesn’t stretch across the aisles and I haven’t seen anyone extend hands to a stranger yet.

At my Confirmation, our current priest had all of us Catechumens and Candidates come forward and make a semi-circle behind the altar, facing the congregation, and hold hands while we said the Our Father. It was unexpected and a little awkward, but it really was a very special, holy moment. Everyone seemed lit by holy light as we stood around the altar, bathed in all the light from all the Easter Vigil candles.

I don’t see anything wrong with a family holding hands as they pray together, either at home around the dinner table or at Mass. Groups of people pray the Our Father together all the time in the Rosary or Chaplet. Families should be praying together at home, asking God to give us our daily bread, to forgive each other, to have God’s will done here in our home as well as on Earth. Why is it any different to do it at home and not at Mass? We are all God’s family, and we can pray to Him together and separately, holding hands or not.

I’m not saying people should be aggressively grabbing your hands, but I find the near-hatred of hand-holding at Mass kind of strange. I haven’t yet got my kids in the hand-holding routine yet, but I would like it if they did. If a stranger extended their hand to me, I would be very happy to take it. I would feel honored and welcomed by them as part of our spiritual family.

If the priest hasn’t forbidden it, I say let those who like it, participate, and those who don’t, just turn a blind eye and focus on your own prayers.
 
If the priest hasn’t forbidden it, I say let those who like it, participate, and those who don’t, just turn a blind eye and focus on your own prayers.
It took 28 replies to finally get to this bit of common sense. That’s CAF for you.
 
I’ve no idea when it started. It wasn’t done when I was little ('60’s and '70’s). Then bam in the late ‘90’s everyone’s doing it (except me). This is one of those times during mass when I bow my head and close my eyes so I don’ t have to see everyone doing this. (another time is during communion, so I don’t see whether people are bowing and or chewing like cows). If I close my eyes, and don’t watch everyone else, I can’t get judgy…
 
I believe you may be correct. Same with the “jazz hands” during Mass.

At my former home parish, the then-new pastor simply told every one to join hands for the Family Prayer–as a sign of unity–and one cannot have too much of that. At a Mass at a different parish, there was a group–possibly a family–which sat in the front row and made a big show of it,

Once, our local Catholic radio host mentioned how he deals with it: Just before the Our Father, he would ‘sneeze’ into both hands, and no one bothers him.
 
Strange you should say “cultish” as we’ve seen individuals form circles during the Lord’s Prayer–even if one must turn one’s back to the altar. This odd practice suddenly stopped after a few times.
 
Much simpler than faking a sneeze, of with we have little trouble this time of year.
 
And, I don’t know about faking a sneeze. It would make me feel kinda guilty
 
It is? Everyone is doing it at the local Roman Catholic Church here. If what you say is true, why don’t the priests say something about it being reserved for the priest alone?
 
Totally agree. And when people get all ‘uncomfortable’ I ask them: and doesn’t the Bible say ‘Greet one another with a holy kiss’? imagine that!
 
Don’t get me wrong Max, you’re a great dude but I’m not holding your hand 😛
 
Because that’s not the best hill to die upon.

Sometimes the bother involved in righting a liturgical wrong is just too much of a hassle
 
Easier said than done, especially when you’re a head server at an OF parish haha

I do love TLM though
 
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