Handicapped brother

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Danielelfe

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Hi all,

I have a question. My younger brother (27) has some form of autism and lives in a home with other people who are mentally disabled and professional caregivers. Our parents are still alive and help him of course…

I was wondering if I could emigrate to or keep living in another country when both of my parents died and my brother is still alive? Or do I need to be in the vicinity of my brother? I think I would need to help him with some financial stuff (but that can be done from distance), but he would probably also be lonely since he has no friends except for his parents…Thanks!

yours,

Daniel.
 
Danielelfe said:
I could
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You are asking this question as if you are asking for someone to give you permission. It isn’t a matter of permission.

This is a matter of prudential judgment.

It’s something you should discuss with your priest, your brother, and your parents as far as the long term financial plan for your brother, and what sort of support he will need and expect. And, you cross that bridge when you come to it. It may be that you live somewhere far away and then move back. It could be that he moves to live near you. It could be that your situation when the time comes is completely different than you thought it would be.
 
I meant If I should live close to him in that situation or is it also morally permissible to live far away from him? I think the biggest reason would be because of his loneliness. The financials will be taken care off…
 
Would it be possible to bring him with you? Are there other people who can visit him? It seems like there might be all sorts of solutions.
 
This is not really a moral question, as you are clearly not intending to abandon your brother even if you emigrate, but rather it’s a question that requires you to think, plan, and discuss with your parents in advance to see what might be feasible, considering both your brother’s welfare and your own. In addition, it doesn’t sound like you’re planning to move next week, and a million things could change about this whole situation between now and then.

Is there anything that can be done now to help your brother make some more friends outside the family? Have you or your parents discussed this with the care home? Even if you stay in his vicinity, you’re not going to be able to constantly keep him company if he’s living in a group home and you are having a life and likely a family of your own, because your first commitment would have to be to your spouse and children.

If you emigrated, would it be easy for you to travel back and forth to the country where your brother would be staying? Would it be an option for him to move with you and be in a care home in your new country, closer to you?

Assuming he stayed in his home country and you were at a distance, would you be able to keep in touch via Skype a few times a week, and would that be a sufficient social outlet?
 
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Could your brother emigrate with you after your parents pass away?
 
Would be very hard, but I don’t think he would want that either…
 
Danielelfe said:
I was wondering if I could emigrate to or keep living in another country when both of my parents died and my brother is still alive?
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A lot of stuff could happen between now and then. For example, you might emigrate, discover you don’t like the new country, and then move back.
 
How do you think your brother would respond/react?

If it was me in that situation I wouldn’t personally move but every situation is different.

Is there a country that you have in mind now or some work lined up there?
 
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