Happiness

[3NailRenewal]

Hey guys. The whole reason i signed up on this board was to see your philosophies and beliefs on this idea i have been thinkning about.

I have been pretty distraught lately. I realized that i have been tricked by modern society into “growing up.” By doing so i have pretty much destroyed myself.

I remember when i was little, and everything that i experienced i experienced with a joyful happiness. Although i did question things, i hardly judged anything and was therefore able to enjoy things for what they were. Take a movie for example. When i ws little, i would watch the same film over and over and over again, i’m sure it annoyed some people. But the thing was, that i enjoyed watching it so much, it was easy to keep sitting through.Now that i “grew up”, i pretty mush psychologically rape whatever experience i am having. Take the film example again. This time i have expectations going into the film, and if they are not met, i do not enjoy the film. While watching it, i am always thinking of wht should happen next, instead of just experiencing it in real time as i did when i was younger. Even if i end up liking it, i immediatley search for more things like it, instead of just watching it again when i was little. I think the world tricked me into “growing up”, and i am afraid i will never experience happiness again.

Reply if you would like to, if not, then it is okay, i kind of get used to feeling like ****.

 

[Trishie]

While it is wonderful to be able to critically examine and appreciate such things in our lives.
I hope that you will also begin again to appreciate the the joys of the present moment.
It is not inconsistent with maturity to be able to joy in the present moment.
Maturity consists in a balance of the mind and heart, don’t you think!

 

[3NailRenewal]

While it is wonderful to be able to critically examine and appreciate such things in our lives.
I hope that you will also begin again to appreciate the the joys of the present moment.
It is not inconsistent with maturity to be able to joy in the present moment.
Maturity consists in a balance of the mind and heart, don’t you think!

Yes, but i beleive that is the problem. if someone told me to “be mature” instead of “grow up”, then maybe i would still be able to experience unbiased joy.

 

[joeyvandelmeyer]

take a look:

directionforourtimes.com/

youshallbelieve.com/

holylove.org/

rosaryoftheunborn.com/

americaneedsfatima.org/Articles/amazing-video-eucharist-is-our-lord.html

focustvonline.com

may God bless

 

[3NailRenewal]

thanks for the websites, but i think i came across with the wrong idea.

Has anyone any knowledge or experience of what i am talking about? is anyone in the same boat as me? Am i not making sense?

Any comments about happiness or journeys to/from despair?

 

[empther]

Happy people are looking forward to good things in the future.

This sums up the way to happiness.

What good things do you have to look forward to? God always offers something.

The Lord is my shepherd; I shall no want
He maketh me to lie in green pastures; he leadeth me to still waters
Though I walk through the valley of death I will fear no evil for Thou art with me
Goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever

 

[3NailRenewal]

but if you look to the future for your happiness, how can you be happy in the moment?

 

[Luvtosew]

I have a hard time understanding your question. Growing up and being mature are two different things. Just cause one ages doesn’t mean they mature.

We were all kids with no cares in the world , able to live in the present monent without any of the demands we have when we get older, school, work, family etc.

Happiness isn’t a given, one needs to decide to be happy regardless of external circumstances, because if we have to rely on external circumstances to be happy,
most of us would have few happy times. Life is up and down. We have many joyful times
in our lives hopefully. So we have to make the best of things and be happy, can’t search for it, as its within. I see your a Christian so thats a real plus , you can know that God is watching over you throught the good and bad times. So you can depend on him, and be happy knowing hes with you.

 

[tonyrey]

It is always tempting to believe we’re not as happy as we could be (or should be) but too much introversion is the surest way to spoil our enjoyment of anything. Children tend to be happier than adults because they don’t take anything for granted - unless they are spoilt - and they live in the present rather than thinking about the past or future. They are hardly aware of themselves and totally absorbed in what they are doing or watching. That is why Jesus told us we have to be like children if we are to enter the kingdom of heaven. Their faith and simplicity should be an inspiration and an example for all of us (in keeping with your point about “growing up”

 

[3NailRenewal]

Happiness isn’t a given, one needs to decide to be happy regardless of external circumstances, .

Doesnt that make happiness relative? Thus making it a fake happiness? I could pretend to be happy, but i know i would just be fooling myself, and that it would be just the same as popping happy pills, wouldn’t it?

 

[3NailRenewal]

Children tend to be happier than adults because they don’t take anything for granted - unless they are spoilt - and they live in the present rather than thinking about the past or future. They are hardly aware of themselves and totally absorbed in what they are doing or watching.QUOTE]

This is a very interesting idea, i will have to think about it more, thank you.

But is childhood greater when we are children, or when we are older looking back? As children i do not think we ever really think of childhood, we just live life. When we look back on it, we truly realized how happy we were, and how much fun it is…but where do those feelings we had as a child go to? Is it just some stupid chemical reaction in the brain, and once you get past a certian age, too late, it was fun while it lasted? If that is so, then how can one ever obtain that happiness ever again?

 

[GlorytoJesus]

“When I see someone sad I always think, she is refusing something to Jesus.”

• Blessed Teresa of Calcutta.

 

[eddadonkey]

+JMJ+

3NailRenewal, I thank you from the bottom of my heart for this thread. I have been feeling down for the past few days, but your post reminded me too of my carefree days as a small child. Oh how my parents laugh now remembering how annoyed they were when I was just a child because I kept on playing “The Sound of Music” and kept rewinding to scenes of my favorite little girl there! I remember how I thought all people are actually as immaterial as ghosts until the moment I touch them And so many other funny, fun, and happy things of childhood.

I think it’s because we were so small and so new into the world. Everything was so big, and so new, and so shiny, that even watching our favorite shows back then never made them old, and all chairs and beds were mountains to conquer, and things like that.

But now, we think we are so big, so forward looking, and heck, we are bored.

And yet, G.K. Chesterton told us that we can regain this wonder, this happiness, by showing us why we lost it in the first place:

Humility was largely meant as a restraint upon the arrogance and infinity of the appetite of man. He was always outstripping his mercies with his own newly invented needs. His very power of enjoyment destroyed half his joys. By asking for pleasure, he lost the chief pleasure; for the chief pleasure is surprise. Hence it became evident that if a man would make his world large, he must be always making himself small. Even the haughty visions, the tall cities, and the toppling pinnacles are the creations of humility. Giants that tread down forests like grass are the creations of humility. Towers that vanish upwards above the loneliest star are the creations of humility. For towers are not tall unless we look up at them; and giants are not giants unless they are larger than we. All this gigantesque imagination, which is, perhaps, the mightiest of the pleasures of man, is at bottom entirely humble. It is impossible without humility to enjoy anything – even pride.

Orthodoxy

Thank you for reminding this me again.

At that time the disciples came to Jesus, saying, “Who is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven?” And calling to him a child, he put him in the midst of them, and said, “Truly, I say to you, unless you turn and become like children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. Whoever humbles himself like this child, he is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven.” Matthew 18:1-4

Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the Kingdom of God.
Blessed are the meek, for they shall inherit the land.

 

[hsmomforlife]

My husband just started reading a book by Denis Praeger (not Catholic, Jewish I’m pretty sure) called “Happiness is a Serious Problem: A Human Nature Repair Manual”. I haven’t read it myself, but…the title seemed to fit right in with your concerns…so I thought I would mention it.

 

[Allegra]

Our brains are wired differently when we are children than when we are adolescants and adults. Children are wired to take in information at an amazing rate, experience, and imitate. As we get older, we are wired to analyze, criticize, and determine our place in the world. We don’t experience joy in the same way because of it and at times, adults and especially adolescents are prone to discontentment that we would never experience as a child. Is that something like what you are describing? Because of all the stresses and responsibilities of taking care of oneself, we need to make time to enjoy life.

 

[Luvtosew]

Doesnt that make happiness relative? Thus making it a fake happiness? I could pretend to be happy, but i know i would just be fooling myself, and that it would be just the same as popping happy pills, wouldn’t it?

No, not at all, we have a choice on how we look at life, we can choose to have happiness and joy in everything or we can choose to be glum and pessimistic, its up to how one chooses to see things.
If you need to pretend to be happy then you are not. I would not suggest someone pretend to be happy. Happiness is not a gooey, ha ha feeling, its a contentment feeling.

 

[3NailRenewal]

eddadonky, i now must thank you for that quote, i will put it to the test and see if i cant regain my happiness. thank you

The other thing that troubled me was the way in which we made friends when we were little. It seemed to me to be so easy; but know it seems like everyone is just judging each other or looking at each others facebooks to see if they match on anything. dont get me wrong, i judge people all the time, but i now realize i never really didi that when i was little.

I cant help but think that long ago it would not be a surprise to find a child of KKK memebers to be playing with a black child. They would so easily just get along and have a good time, totally unaware of what was going on. But by accident then, they would be doing exactly what Jesus is telling us to do. The hardest part would be loving like a child when you know fully well what the consequences could be, but you have to choose to forget them, much like how the children did not even realize them, i think they should be meaningless to us as well.

I think it would be safe to say that if we use the gifts and fruits of the Holy Spirit, and keep some philosophis we had as a child, we could then be pleased with watching the same film over and over, instead of looking for happiness in places that it is not.

 

[exnihilo]

What a great topic. I definitely agree with the idea that Christ says we are to be like children and the Chesterton quote. There is something great in the joy and innocence of childhood. I often lament what I’ve learned about the world. And I often get discouraged. It is funny when I was a child I remember being terrified of living forever because I was afraid I would get bored. Now that I’m older I’m terrified of not living forever.

I really agree with the idea about living in the present. The older you get the more regret you can have for the past and the more fear you can have for the future, as your mortal existence winds down. You cant change the past and you cant guarantee a future - meaning your days on Earth and exactly how they will be spent. Excessive worry about either destroys happiness because you are worrying about that which you cant control. Accepting your lack of power over the past and the future is important. I find a big part of happiness is acceptance of reality which is also the truth.

I would also say about happiness that we often chase imperfect or even evil objects to provide happiness. We think we will find fulfillment in things which are not truly good. When we dont we experience disappointment and unhappiness. Being imperfect creatures rather than stop seeking happiness in things which do not provide it we often increase our participating in false happiness. Really and truly the things which make one happy are the things the Church promotes. If one is focused on God they will find happiness and will find it in simple things as they marvel at the world as His handiwork and not just a series of complex equations that happened by chance.

 

[3NailRenewal]

Our brains are wired differently when we are children than when we are adolescants and adults. Children are wired to take in information at an amazing rate, experience, and imitate. As we get older, we are wired to analyze, criticize, and determine our place in the world. We don’t experience joy in the same way because of it and at times, adults and especially adolescents are prone to discontentment that we would never experience as a child. Is that something like what you are describing? Because of all the stresses and responsibilities of taking care of oneself, we need to make time to enjoy life.

I am deeply troubled by this response. If what you beleive is true, then the great joy we experienced as children was nothing but a fluke of the mind. It also means that for the rest of our lives we are doomed into only dreaming about what joy we used to experience as a child. It also means that we lose all hope from ever gaining that happiness ever again. I think that in order to become again like a child and enter the Kingdom of Heaven, it is an absolute must that we, once again, have happiness like we did when we were little.

you are saying it is impossible to ever again regain that joy.

 

[PJM]

=3NailRenewal;8925505]Hey guys. The whole reason i signed up on this board was to see your philosophies and beliefs on this idea i have been thinkning about.

I have been pretty distraught lately. I realized that i have been tricked by modern society into “growing up.” By doing so i have pretty much destroyed myself.

I remember when i was little, and everything that i experienced i experienced with a joyful happiness. Although i did question things, i hardly judged anything and was therefore able to enjoy things for what they were. Take a movie for example. When i ws little, i would watch the same film over and over and over again, i’m sure it annoyed some people. But the thing was, that i enjoyed watching it so much, it was easy to keep sitting through.Now that i “grew up”, i pretty mush psychologically rape whatever experience i am having. Take the film example again. This time i have expectations going into the film, and if they are not met, i do not enjoy the film. While watching it, i am always thinking of wht should happen next, instead of just experiencing it in real time as i did when i was younger. Even if i end up liking it, i immediatley search for more things like it, instead of just watching it again when i was little. I think the world tricked me into “growing up”, and i am afraid i will never experience happiness again.

Reply if you would like to, if not, then it is okay, i kind of get used to feeling like ****.

Either God is in charge or you are my friend. And the responsibility can’t be shared

Suffering is and ought to be a part of the “human condition”

Take Up your Cross and Follow Me
**Phil.2: 8 “And being found in human form he humbled himself and became obedient unto death, even death on a cross Luke.9 :23 And he said to all, "If any man would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me. Mark.8: 34 **And he called to him the multitude with his disciples, and said to them, "If any man would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross and follow me. **Luke.9: 23 **And he said to all, "If any man would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me. Luke.14: 7 Whoever does not bear his own cross and come after me, cannot be my disciple.”

1Pet.5: 1, 9 “So I exhort the elders among you, as a fellow elder and a witness of the sufferings of Christ as well as a partaker in the glory that is to be revealed. Resist him, firm in your faith, knowing that the same experience of suffering is required of your brotherhood throughout the world.”

1Pet.4: 13 ” But rejoice in so far as you share Christ’s sufferings, that you may also rejoice and be glad when his glory is revealed.

**Phil.1: 29 **“For it has been granted to you that for the sake of Christ you should not only believe in him but also suffer for his sake, “

**2Thes.1: 5 **“This is evidence of the righteous judgment of God, that you may be made worthy of the kingdom of God, for which you are suffering “

Heb. 2: 10 For it was fitting that he, for whom and by whom all things exist, in bringing many sons to glory, should make the pioneer of their salvation perfect through suffering.

Noone can doubt that God LOVES THEN! So set reasonable and attainable expetiations.

You continue in my daily thoughts and prayers,

Pat