Hard Decision to Make

[YEARNING4TRUTH]

Hi everyone, I just wanted to ask for some second opinion on this one decision that I’m trying to make right now. Okay, so a friend of mine had asked me if I could help him report one of his neighbors for child abuse, but the thing is I’m worried that his neighbor might be part of some gang and they might come back and get my friend and I, not to mention our families. I know what the right thing to do is and I’m willing to go ahead with helping my friend out, I’m just not sure how to approach the situation in a way that would keep me, my friend, and our families safe. I’m kind of familiar with the whole protocol, I’m just concerned that somehow the perpetrators will be able to get some personal information about us, maybe by bribing someone or threatening the investigator to disclose our identities. So yeah, please let me know what you guys think and please pray that we’ll make the right decision and at the same time be kept away from harm. Please also offer up some prayers for those children and their parents, that the cycle of abuse will end and that their hearts will go through some kind of conversion. Thanks.

 

[UbiCaritas]

If you’re in the US, you can report anonymously via the phone, and need give no identifying information to the person taking the report.

 

[Myst]

^What he said. Call CPS or your local law enforcement. As a 911 dispatcher, anonymous calls happen all the time. If they want to meet with you it is still quite possible to keep your info anonymous (in these situations we are careful with caller info).

 

[Allegra]

If you believe a child is being abused, you are morally obligated to report it. In most states, you don’t even have to identify yourself, however, if you do, you can remain anonymous. Keep in mind that if you directly witnessed the abuse yourself, then they may need your testimony to make a case against the abuser. That’s a decision you have to make for yourself, but I would be really hard pressed to not help protect a child from someone who is hurting him.

 

[dconklin]

Helping your friend report? If you do not have direct knowledge of the abuse, steer clear.

 

[Vic_Taltrees_UK]

Why does your friend need help (without going into details)?

 

[EasterJoy]

If you believe a child is being abused, you are morally obligated to report it. In most states, you don’t even have to identify yourself, however, if you do, you can remain anonymous. Keep in mind that if you directly witnessed the abuse yourself, then they may need your testimony to make a case against the abuser. That’s a decision you have to make for yourself, but I would be really hard pressed to not help protect a child from someone who is hurting him.

Yes, and immediately. Think about looking that child in the eye and saying, “after I found out, I dinked around for a couple of days, thinking about it.” The child, meanwhile, is in imminent danger. The physical evidence of the last abuse is fading. Time is of the essence.

The authorities are quite aware that abusers can be generally dangerous people. I agree with the poster who advised calling 9-11 and asking how to handle this.

 

[MJJean]

My best advice would be to Google local child protective services and contact them directly. Usually, they have their abuse reporting hotline listed prominently on their page along with reporting instructions for after hours reports.

A person reporting abuse can give their contact info in case they are needed to testify, but ask that the info be kept confidential. A reporter of abuse can also make the call completely anonymously.

Aside from reporting the child abuse, OP’s friend might also want to consider reporting the suspected gang activity to the local police.

 

[gardenswithkids]

… Okay, so a friend of mine had asked me if I could help him report one of his neighbors for child abuse, but the thing is I’m worried that his neighbor might be part of some gang and they might come back and get my friend and I, not to mention our families. …

What kind of help does your friend want from you? Finding the phone number to CPS or translating from another language into English? Have you personally witnessed anything specific to report? Are you thinking of telling CPS hear-say, gossip and suspicion or is there you have seen that you believe needs to be reported?

I don’t know you or your friend or the situation, so please don’t take what I’m going to write next personal, BUT suspecting someone to be guilty of child abuse and gang membership may be based off reality OR

OR it may be based on **racial prejudice **–which is not a reason to CPS

OR it may be caused by something else, such as one neighbor not liking the other neighbor, or one neighbor not agreeing their neighbors’ reasonable but different child-rearing techniques. —which are not reasons to call CPS

It’s hard to tell what’s going on, and you didn’t really share any specific details about what you’ve seen that leads you to suspect abuse. We certainly don’t want to see innocent children suffer at the hands of abusers! But neither do we want to see innocent parents and their children suffer because of anonymous tips called into CPS based off prejudice and/or neighborhood disputes.

 

[YEARNING4TRUTH]

Thank you all for all of your advice, I’ll keep them in mind