Has anyone had this problem?

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Steve56

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Have any of you experienced a problem with busybodies standing around inappropriately close to the confessional during your confession?

I have experienced this a few times, one time it was committed by a woman who works for the church. I heard her fussing with the bulletins that were on a table outside the confessional. She of all people should have known that the bulletins can wait, especially during confession.

Another time I had a hunch someone was immediately outside of my confessional and it caused me some distress, to the point I cut short my confession. I was troubled by this and realized that I inadvertently withheld during my confession. I later returned to confession and discussed this with the Priest. He told me the confession eves-droppers are a real problem.

I recall in the past when confessions were heard on both sides of the confessional, one could hear the discussion between the priest and the person making the confession. I always thought it was wrong to listen, so I would make a conscious effort to NOT listen. But I cannot for the life of me understand how someone who works for the Church would deliberately put themselves in a position where they can hear confessions.
 
Steve, I’ve not had that experience, fortunately. What type of arrangement is in place in your parish to hear confessions? Do you go behind a closed door or a heavy drape? Perhaps during times of confession a rope barrier could be put in place to keep people far enough away from the confessional so as to reassure the penitents that what is said is truly confidential.
 
It is much easier to change your own habits than those of someone else. Whisper your Confession into the grate. Father will let you know if he can’t hear you.
 
I have not had this problem but I do avoid going to confession where the confessional does not have a door but only a curtain. My home parish has rather large confessionals with a very solid wooden door - that makes me feel much better. Several other parishes in the area have tiny little spaces with only a curtain for privacy. One time, I went to confession and Father and I were the only ones there and since the confessional itself gives me panic and anxiety attacks, we simply sat in a pew and chatted quietly.

I have found that for me, scheduling a private confession works best. I don’t feel rushed, I can speak freely as we meet in the Priest’s private office and I usually feel better as we can discuss my “sins” or rather the underlying issue that lead me to sin.
 
Suggest to the priest that they play sacred music or the organ during Confessional times. It is uplifting & drowns out virtualy everything else.
 
“He told me the confession eves-droppers are a real problem.”

:eek:
 
I’ve seen that problem with people who are irgnorants waiting in line to close to the confessional. But I’ve also seen “loud mouths” literally you can stand 15ft away and hear them clear as day. One time this happened and all of us could hear her sins, so what I did I started to pray outloud, not so loud that it was distracting but enough for those in line waiting could hear me soon they started to pray as well because none of us wanted to hear her and it was not our business to know what she was confessing.
 
At my home parish the confessionals are so poorly designed that one needs to make a conscious effort not to hear what is being said. Once when I was waiting, at least fifteen feet away, for my turn, I had to hum to myself so I would not hear what was said.
 
I have experienced this problem.not at Confession but at Banks , ATMs doctors visits , etc.My feeling is with people who do this they are taking advantage of people’s reticence to make a fuss because after all you are in the Church and she is using this fact to further her nosiness.What I would do is approach her nicely and while smiling ,outside the Church and suggest to her that her nearby presence is making a lot of people uncomfortable and being such a lovely person she would understand the feelings of the penitents as she would no doubt feel uncomfortable as well.Also as she is so good as a volunteer you would be reluctant to have to explain to the clergy why a sign or dividing rope might be necessary.Sometimes you have to take a stand with these people and if they are bold enough to behave badly, then they should expect that someone is going to pull them up …good luck
 
Steve56 said:
Have any of you experienced a problem with busybodies standing around inappropriately close to the confessional during your confession?

I have experienced this a few times, one time it was committed by a woman who works for the church. I heard her fussing with the bulletins that were on a table outside the confessional. She of all people should have known that the bulletins can wait, especially during confession.

Another time I had a hunch someone was immediately outside of my confessional and it caused me some distress, to the point I cut short my confession. I was troubled by this and realized that I inadvertently withheld during my confession. I later returned to confession and discussed this with the Priest. He told me the confession eves-droppers are a real problem.

I recall in the past when confessions were heard on both sides of the confessional, one could hear the discussion between the priest and the person making the confession. I always thought it was wrong to listen, so I would make a conscious effort to NOT listen. But I cannot for the life of me understand how someone who works for the Church would deliberately put themselves in a position where they can hear confessions.
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You bring up a good point.

And many times, I can hear the priests while folks are in confession.

That’s why I keep my volume very, very low.
 
just a follow up to the last letter.I did hear of a secretary who was spouting all the confidential business like Annulments and personal family stories of congregants all over the place she was like the town crier or the soap opera queen.she was eventually fired after a lot of damage had been done ,I don’t know what screening would be in place for employes but it certainly put alot off people off asking the church’s advice on family matters and such
 
It’s the pastor’s responsibility to provide a secure, private, Confessional.

If this isn’t a pastor’s priority, it should be.
 
At our little rural OF parish the confessional is not very sound proof so we say the Rosary before Masses. Amazing how many folks participate to provide a little sound cover for the penitents.
 
I have a thought on the issue of sounds escaping from the confessional. For churches remodeling the confessional or building new ones there is “sound proof” sheet rock. It’s expensive but will keep all sound sealed in the confessional.
 
corsair said:
At our little rural OF parish the confessional is not very sound proof so we say the Rosary before Masses. Amazing how many folks participate to provide a little sound cover for the penitents.
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I had to smile at this. In our parish, for many years there was Confession for an hour before the 12 noon Mass on a Saturday, which co-oincided with the unofficial Rosary group which met to say the Rosary at 11.30.
One particular Saturday, the priest erupted from the box in high dudgeon, to tell the Rosary group in no uncertain terms to keep the noise down as he and the person in the box couldn’t hear each other.
He said that having people shout it out at different speeds made it even worse.
 
In alot of churches, most folks only go to confession during Lent or Advent, and then only to the communal services, so perhaps the confessional isn’t the priority that it should be.
 
I’ve been to confession at two different churches where even if you stand FAR away (I’m not good at distances but I guess 100 feet?) you can hear what is being said. One has an old “box-type” confessional with doors and the other just has curtains. It is ridiculous what you can hear.

You’d probably have to stand all the way across the church not to hear. When I back up even farther, then other people get in front of you in line, not realizing you are in line. Talking quietly or whispering yourself doesn’t stop the priest from talking in a normal voice which others can hear.
 
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