Hate, mortal sin and Hell

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I have an ongoing problem with anger and hate. Overall, I hate people. I know it’s wrong, I work on it, I pray for compassion and charity. I go to confession. Some days I feel hatred before I even make it back to the car after going to confession.

I’m pretty certain this hate/anger issue is going to land me in Hell.

My question for the forum members is, at what point is hate and anger a mortal sin? If I hate you but I’m nice to your face, is that a step in the right direction, or am I still in mortal sin for the hate in my heart?

If it is a mortal sin, I will probably never be in a state of grace.

I’m not one to blame Satan in general, but does the amount and frequency of hatred I’m plagued with have anything to do with a spiritual warfare type of issue or is it just my issue?
 
I don’t know if I can, but I’ll try.

It’s irrational, I know that. I don’t have to know the person or be offended by the persons actions, clothes, etc. It seems as though the better a person is, the more likely I am to hate them. There are days when I hate children. If someone is a jerk, I will probably be angry about it, but I’m less likely to feel hatred towards that person than someone who was kind.

Yeah, it’s messed up.

It seems as though the more I pray, or try to be like Mary, the more distant God seems, the more hate I feel. I don’t understand it.

I am starting to feel like I shouldn’t keep confessing it though. It doesn’t seem to be helping and 'I firmly resolve with the help of your grace to sin no more etc… ’ seems wrong to say when I know I’m probably going to hate someone before I even get home.
 
Pray for the grace of Charity. It doesn’t sound to me like full blown hatred but more like being judgemental and somewhat intolerant towards others. I struggle with it as well and I believe that the Holy Spirit has been revealling this to me as I don’t like being that way any more and it sounds like you don’t either. I make it a point to pray for my enemies and people who bug me even though I may not always feel all sincere. The point is that the Lord commands us to do so. He will take our efforts of bending our wills to His and perfect that over time.
 
We can’t always control our feelings. This sounds like “your flesh.” Prayer is great, but you may have to find an outlet for your anger. Exercise maybe? You could be over stressed, struggling with sexual desire, low blood sugar, or something else.
 
to me it sounds more like some kind of problem you have to go and talk to a priest and a good catholic therapist.

also we cannot sin over stuff we can’t control, if you do your best to avoid hate (which might be doing what I reccomended you). feelings are only sinful when we consent with them, we can feel anger, lust or envy, but if we really try to control ourselves there is no sin.
 
user57289 said:
I have an ongoing problem with anger and hate. Overall, I hate people. I know it’s wrong, I work on it, I pray for compassion and charity. I go to confession. Some days I feel hatred before I even make it back to the car after going to confession.

I’m pretty certain this hate/anger issue is going to land me in Hell.

My question for the forum members is, at what point is hate and anger a mortal sin? If I hate you but I’m nice to your face, is that a step in the right direction, or am I still in mortal sin for the hate in my heart?

If it is a mortal sin, I will probably never be in a state of grace.

I’m not one to blame Satan in general, but does the amount and frequency of hatred I’m plagued with have anything to do with a spiritual warfare type of issue or is it just my issue?
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CCC 2302 By recalling the commandment, “You shall not kill,” our Lord asked for peace of heart and denounced murderous anger and hatred as immoral.

Anger is a desire for revenge. “To desire vengeance in order to do evil to someone who should be punished is illicit,” but it is praiseworthy to impose restitution “to correct vices and maintain justice.” If anger reaches the point of a deliberate desire to kill or seriously wound a neighbor, it is gravely against charity; it is a mortal sin. The Lord says, “Everyone who is angry with his brother shall be liable to judgment.”

CCC 2303 Deliberate hatred is contrary to charity. Hatred of the neighbor is a sin when one deliberately wishes him evil.** Hatred of the neighbor is a grave sin when one deliberately desires him grave harm.** “But I say to you, Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, so that you may be sons of your Father who is in heaven.”
 
If these feelings are not wanted then I honestly do not think that it is sinful. If you want to hate people and have no desire to stop having them then it would be sinful in my opinion. Also, from what you write, it seems like this may be some sort of psychological problem. I think you should probably go to a therapist or some type of medical professional about this.
 
Hi user52789,

I am sorry for your struggles.

I agree with the others who suggested counseling.

From reading your post, it sounds more to me that you are more angry and frustrated with others perhaps, rather than being hateful, but that is only my interpretation.

I agree too in that I would talk to your pastor about your feelings, and let him help you.
 
It sounds like an obsesion or a compulsion to feel this way. It might be chemical imbalance of some sort. You might be so upset in disposition that that is your immediate reaction to any interaction with people. It may not be your fault at all but some imbalance making you feel hate, and then reacting with this hate when others associate with you.

Maybe this inner hate disposition was caused by something that happened to you which you are not aware of. And now you carry it around with you ready to explode when someone else pulls the trigger.

Anyway, it sounds as tho you are fully conditioned to behave this way whatever the cause.

If it were me, I would see my doctor and see what he would say.

By the by, I would get a scapular or medal and have it blessed and wear it if you don’t already have one.

May God our Father give you grace and peace.
 
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