I did the 19th annotation about 30 years ago while continuing to live my everyday life and going to work. A good Jesuit priest from a nearby Jesuit retreat house directed me through it. I was considering a religious vocation but had conflicting thoughts and feelings so going through the Ignatian exercises helped me to discern with the help of the priest what was going on here. I learned that my conflict was essentially between my mind and heart. The mind as referring to the intellect whose object is knowledge and truth and the heart as referring to the will whose object is the good which is desirable and lovable and associated feelings/emotions/passions that overflow into the soul/body composite which we may experience as ‘feeling’ good about something or ‘feeling’ an aversion towards something. So, my discernment concerned somehow integrating my mind and heart for we are a unity of soul and body and I learned that God speaks to us through both our mind and heart, our thoughts and desires or ‘feelings’ as it were.
On the one hand, concerning the religious vocation, my mind told me from the teaching of the Church, St Paul, and the example of Christ’s life itself that this vocation is objectively better than marriage or the single state in the world without vows since the religious vows are about a better thing. On the other hand, my heart or desires appeared to be more inclined to life in the world or the lay state and I also was aware from the teaching of St Josemaria Escriva who founded Opus Dei that the lay state in the world is a divine vocation from God as well as what Vatican II taught about the universal call to holiness in all states of life.
As I was going through the meditations the priest gave me to do such as from the gospels, the priest told me to write down the thoughts that came to my mind in the meditations as well as how I felt about these thoughts such as did I experience a good feeling about them or a not so good feeling or aversion to them. To make a long story short, the thoughts that came to my mind in the meditations seemed to predominately relate to the lay state or vocation and which I felt pretty good about. On the other hand, thoughts pertaining to the religious life I seemed to feel a kind of aversion for. The priest told me that if God wants us to do something such as discerning a vocation, for the Ignatian exercises are for trying to discern God’s will for us at that time we do them, He will give you a desire for it which you will feel good about for we desire and love something because it seems good to us. It makes sense that if God is calling some person to the religious life or priesthood, for example, He will give that person a desire for it, a love for it. God doesn’t force somebody to enter religious life who has no desire for it and who may even have an aversion for it. So, in my case and at the time I went through the Ignatian exercises, it was discerned with the help of the priest directing me, that God was not calling me to the religious state at least at that time.