Have you ever felt like walking away from the whole thing?

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suupah said:
Maybe if the priests job was more performance based it would be better. I have seen some priests that just drive people away from God and his church and I don’t understand 1. why they want to be priests and 2. How they are allowed to remain in a role that is SO vital to the future of the church.

My real grievance is the way they spend money. Not so much their homilies and personalities or conduct. EVERY parish (i move a lot so there have been many) i have been involved in spends their money on all the wrong things. Very little is spent on Catechesis and liturgy. Those are the foundations or pillars of the future.
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have you thought about volunteering for a position on Parish Council where you maybe able to have a positive influence on how the money is spent or have you already tried this.

Pray for the Priest and the Parish Coucil
 
suupah said:
My real grievance is the way they spend money. Not so much their homilies and personalities or conduct. EVERY parish (i move a lot so there have been many) i have been involved in spends their money on all the wrong things. Very little is spent on Catechesis and liturgy. Those are the foundations or pillars of the future.
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As far as I know, how the money is spent is decided by the financial council along with the pastor. Unless one is in the financial council, no one else really knows how budgets are allocated.
 
Priests are not meant to be perfect or even inspired by the Holy Spirit. Priests are just people who have been given authority by bishops (as in priests with more authority but no more guarantee to be inspired by the Holy Spirit) to manage a parish. See where I’m going here? Expecting priests to be holier or more inspired or less egoistic deep down in their hearts than laypeople are going to get us disillusioned with the whole thing. Furthermore, perhaps God chose a person to be a priest not so much because he is better but because he can make others better in one way or other. You never know…
 
1ladybug said:
have you thought about volunteering for a position on Parish Council where you maybe able to have a positive influence on how the money is spent or have you already tried this.

Pray for the Priest and the Parish Coucil
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I have a very erratic schedule travel wise so i find it hard to do anything regularly even mass. But i have thought about it
 
At times I can feel like walking away but not because of what The Church actually is and what She proclaims and teaches, but those words keep coming to me of St. Peter “Where shall we go, Lord, Thou hast the words of eternal life”. If I ask of life and all it contains to be a bed of roses…I ask the impossible. There is another Gospel phrase that keeps coming to mind “the pearl of great price”.

While feelings are important and gifted to human nature by God and as such gifts to be treasured, at times they are not good guides at all to reality other than my own personal interior reality…hence, at times, feelings are a personal and subjective reaction to reality. And these quite personal subjective feelings can have diverse causes also very personal and unique to that person.

Another poster in this thread pointed out that the feeling like walking away can be temptation …and a good observation I thought.

Blessings and regards…barb:)
 
InLight247 said:
As far as I know, how the money is spent is decided by the financial council along with the pastor. Unless one is in the financial council, no one else really knows how budgets are allocated.
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The buck stops with the administrator ie the pastor who takes suggestions from the council.

But bad music and poor formation seems to be an epidemic problem in most parishes that I have been to. Even the ones with huge collections and fancy buildings.
 
Closed parishes: They are not leaving the Christian Faith, in their minds, they are leaving the Catholic Church because of their Parish closing. Those and others who still have their parishes, the complainants may have kids who have fallen away, and, I think the newly divorced. These are some of the folk who think about walking away. Everyone is right about praying. Imagine, when people say they pray but get that they get no response from God. Another thing is when people wonder about who God it. I think that what you are asking about is the feeling which amounts to falling away in our hearts, not actually walking away from the Faith. Those closed parishes are blamed on shortages of Priests, and the shortages of Priests are blamed on the fact that Priests cannot marry, and so that is a round robin, as the shortage of Priests depend on Faith and families, and, hopefully/often a strong Catholic upbringing.
ohioszo said:
It makes one want to give up and join them too, in sympathy … because obviously we are not feeling their pain enough! These people don’t even have the Gospel in their heart, but, are focusing on the rules and their personal lives, ungrateful for what God has done for them in their lives when they loved and obeyed Him at one time.
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suupah said:
The buck stops with the administrator ie the pastor who takes suggestions from the council.

But bad music and poor formation seems to be an epidemic problem in most parishes that I have been to. Even the ones with huge collections and fancy buildings.
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That is not as true as you think. I serve as a Pastoral Council member as well as the chair person of Evangelization Commission of our parish. The only annual budget I know is for the commission I am in charge of. I would not know how much money is allocated to faith formation or any other commission. When you complained about too little money is budgeted for certain area, what are you based on? Unless you see the overall financial budget for every area, and compare the notes, you could not know the fact. If you did not see all the figures on the paper, how did you draw your conclusion?

The Pastor who is in charge of the parish has the best interest of the parish in mind. He is not performing as a tyrant. When I have to ask for increase of the commission budget, the pastor tells me to see financial council chair. The financial council chair and I discuss the ministry need, and he makes the decision.

As for the Pastoral Council, we meet monthly, pray together and discuss any concerns and things going on in the parish. The Pastoral Council is really a prayer group, a consultative body.
Here is what on our website:
Prior to Vatican Council II, authority, power and leadership in the Catholic Church had been vested principally in the clergy, with little or no power in the hands of the laity. The Council sought to rectify this injustice through the implementation of a conciliar process, which eventually became known as the Parish Pastoral Council. The Parish Pastoral Council is an institution that brings together lay people, religious, and the ordained, who, together with their pastors, work jointly to build the parish as a living Christian community.” The Parish Pastoral Council is a consultative body, which unites laity and clergy in a community of prayer, leadership, service and pastoral planning.
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All Pastoral Council meetings are open to everyone in the parish who wishes to attend. If you have concerns, you don’t have to be a Council member to have your voice heard. Just go to the next Council meeting and give your (name removed by moderator)ut.

We, as laity, should always contribute more and complain less.
Instead of being turned of by things that may not be as the way you think, pray for your pastor and parish. After all, church is not the building, church is not the pastor, church is not the bishop………. Church is the body of Christ that includes the pastor, the bishop, and the laity, and the laity is the majority who has collective responsibilities.
 
I was feeling pretty bad this morning. No consolation, a sense of isolation from my peers and also of a purposeless existence, with feelings of guilt and so on. I was ready to give up when I felt this deep peace come over me. This happens when I need it and I am restored. Thanks be to God.
 
InLight247 said:
That is not as true as you think. I serve as a Pastoral Council member as well as the chair person of Evangelization Commission of our parish. The only annual budget I know is for the commission I am in charge of. I would not know how much money is allocated to faith formation or any other commission. When you complained about too little money is budgeted for certain area, what are you based on? Unless you see the overall financial budget for every area, and compare the notes, you could not know the fact. If you did not see all the figures on the paper, how did you draw your conclusion?

The Pastor who is in charge of the parish has the best interest of the parish in mind. He is not performing as a tyrant. When I have to ask for increase of the commission budget, the pastor tells me to see financial council chair. The financial council chair and I discuss the ministry need, and he makes the decision.

As for the Pastoral Council, we meet monthly, pray together and discuss any concerns and things going on in the parish. The Pastoral Council is really a prayer group, a consultative body.
Here is what on our website:

All Pastoral Council meetings are open to everyone in the parish who wishes to attend. If you have concerns, you don’t have to be a Council member to have your voice heard. Just go to the next Council meeting and give your (name removed by moderator)ut.

We, as laity, should always contribute more and complain less.
Instead of being turned of by things that may not be as the way you think, pray for your pastor and parish. After all, church is not the building, church is not the pastor, church is not the bishop………. Church is the body of Christ that includes the pastor, the bishop, and the laity, and the laity is the majority who has collective responsibilities.
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I am not attacking you here. I just know what I see. And what I see is very ornate beautiful churches (many of them new) with very poor extra liturgical activities like formation and continuing catechesis. I was at one of these churches taht was brand new and very nice. I wound up teaching confirmation after being a revert of only 2 months. That is not quality at all. The fact of the matter is they only paid two staffers part time and everyone else was volunteering. The find plenty of money to buy the finest art work and build a multi million dollar complex but can’t seem to find any to create a really solid religious ed program. The priorities are sickening. I can’t contribute in blind trust to my church when i see that.

This is what I have noticed at the 12 Parishes I have been involved in over the past five years. And yes I move a lot.

Every parish I get invovled in I try to get right in the middle of stuff As I am hungry to learn. But I have been dissappointed every time and all i ever get is “why don’t you get something started”

For one I have a very busy full time career that has me traveling all the time and for two I am not qualified. For three It is the churches Job it is their very vocation. i am but a sheep.

Rant over
 
Have you checked out any of the religious orders in your area. We have a group of Sisters here who one evening a month and one Saturday afternoon a month from October to May lead a class. The evening last year was on the Eucharist. They don;t push their order or its charims as we are all older adults and many are couples.

I also attend seminars that are being offered by the Dioceese Center or other Parishes in the city. Check with the education chairperson for your dioceese and watch for buletins on boards or in dioceesen newsletters. Please excuse my spelling. I know that it is horrible.
 
Many times I’ve felt like walking away from the whole thing, but I’ve found that those are usually the times when I need it the most. Jesus felt like walking away from the cross, but He didn’t. Job felt like cursing God, but He didn’t. I guess I’ve kind of come to the conclusion that anything Satan intends for bad, God can use for something good - if only we let him.
 
suupah said:
Every parish I get invovled in I try to get right in the middle of stuff As I am hungry to learn. But I have been dissappointed every time and all i ever get is “why don’t you get something started”

For one I have a very busy full time career that has me traveling all the time and for two I am not qualified. For three It is the churches Job it is their very vocation. i am but a sheep.

Rant over
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It is true the priests have vocations to fulfill. Parish priests are very busy. Their schedules are usually fully packed.

Like I mentioned earlier, the church is you and I. Most of the ministries in church are done by volunteers. That’s the way it should be. All commission chairs,members, pastoral council members, and CCD teachers are volunteers. My parish’s faith formation program have 170 volunteers to teach 750 students. It has to be done by volunteers.

I have a busy professional career too, but I try to do my best to contribute. We must have the concept that our parish is our church family. When we are dealing with family, we just do whatever we can to help. We don’t calculate how much we do, how much others do, we just do. I believe that is what the Lord wants of us.
 
I agree with Inlight247. In our Archdioceese everything is done by volunteers. RCIA, all catechism classes for children, Music Liturgy, preparation of the Altar for Sunday, Holy days, funerals weddings etc, decorating the church, cleaning the Altar cloths, altar servers and priests garments/vestments, visiting the sick and shut ins and taking them communion. Since coming back to the church in Nov 2005 I have been an RCIA sponsor attending RCIA classes every Sunday for Sept to June for an hour the last two years, and last year taught the section on You are called to be Holy. I am also on the Baptismal team and been a parish sponsor twice. Last summer I was asked to be a extra ordinary minister for Holy Communion and to help ring the patients at the nursing home down to the chapel for Mass and then to do the readings at that mass one Saturday morning a month. My parish is an older parish where some younger families have moved in. I at 57 years the youngest volunteer except for the Altar Servers and the Childrens Liturgy. We have a parish supper as a fund raiser in June and it was all 70 and 80 years olds working in the kitchen and serving. Everything for the church costs so much just because it is for a church it seems. It cost $50,000.00 to do the roof a couple of years ago I am told and this spring it developed a leak. We also need new carpet arround the Altar which is going to cost $1300.00 and that is with some of the men in the parish doing the instalation. Taking in $4000.00 a month in the collection plate just doesn’t cover it all. So we use volunteers wherever we can.
 
Thanks for sharing, Ladybug!
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Our parish is the same way, all the activities you mentioned are done by volunteers, and that’s the way it should be.
Even with so many volunteers, our priests are still so busy. I know it as a fact because I usually stop by at the church after work for adoration, and they often are still in the office. Sometimes I see my pastor come back to his office at 6:00 or 7:00 o’clock for evening appointments. The laity has to correct their unreasonable expectation that our priests should do as much as possible and get involved in different ministries in the parish. The church includes clergy and laity. The church is you and I. Priests are doing as much as possible. How about you and I?

If one is doing nothing, one had better complain nothing.
Even one is doing a lot, one still should complain nothing.
After all, we should say to the Lord that “I am your useless servant; I simply did what I was supposed to do.”
 
When the original poster said “…ever felt like…”, I’d like to say yes. But it was just a feeling.
Being a member of one parish and having employment at another parish has taught me a lot. With a merger coming down where I worked, and two of everyone going to end up only one, people really became something else… all fighting for their survival. When it come down to the wire, I left, and my counter-part in the other parish took over my duties. The way it happened was fairly illegal (as far as legalities go outside of the Church). So much so, I wrote a letter to the ArchBishop. He wrote back saying “Sometimes the flock strays.” This reminded me of the Humanness of us Humans, myself included. So, now I am more involved in my home parish, as is my wife, and the grandkids, doing what and where we can.
I have seen a parishes operation from the inside while being a part of it and now understand it is really the business side at that point. But I much more like the friendliness and cooperation of all parties on the volunteer side of things, getting things organized and accomplished while having fun and friendliness. And yes, the Parish is the People, not the structure, or the finances.
This was a 4 year education and I’m glad the Good Lord saw fit to have me go through it… a very good Priority setter.
Feeling were all over the map, and I felt them all… but there was something deep inside that was very stable through it all, I just can’t put my finger on it (Hmm).
 
Yes, but I won’t. Though he slay me, yet shall I trust him.

Also, God is so much better than anything else. And the Church is the greatest thing since sliced bread it my book.
 
Look at it this way

If a believer is wrong, nobody will ever know. If a nonbeliever is wrong, he has hell to pay.
 
iaskquestions said:
Jesus said to the twelve, “Do you also wish to go away?” Simon Peter answered him, “Lord, to whom shall we go? You have the words of eternal life; and we have believed, and have come to know, that you are the Holy One of God.” (John 6:67-69)
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Yup, momentarily (by the Grace of God), but certainly. The above quote from St. John comes to me at those times (my guardian angel is kept on his/her? toes). Priests and bishops are people with an even greater amount of temptations and, especially as we are in need of vocations, extremely, extremely busy. Their hectic life does not often allow them to spend as much time with Him in prayer or in front of the Blessed Sacrament as would be ideal to help them fight off all the temptations to which they are privy. I truly believe that we not only need to pray fervently for vocations but also to pray constantly for existing priests and bishops - we are our brother’s keeper, afterall.

My :twocents:
 
suupah said:
At any point during your spiritual life, have you ever felt like walking away from the whole thing? Just dropping it completely?
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I did. I stood in a shower room at a nursing home I used to work for and begged God to ‘let me go’ because I could not handle the burden he asked me to bear.

I soon after found neo-paganism and my life became an experiment in suffering and misery.

I do not believe spiritually inclined people can walk away from it all, not without replacing it with something less. God’s requirements for us are minor compared to the suffering we bring upon ourselves. Actually, a lot of what we lay at God’s door is our own doing anyway. The difference between doing it with him than without is that he gives us strength to carry on. Left on our own, we suffer much worse than was ever necessary.
 
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