Have you ever regretted your words or a conversation?

[Marybeloved]

I still didn’t say that very well. I do apologize. The mere mention of that show just prompted a negative reaction. Your thread is not comparable to that show, not even close, and I didn’t mean to give that impression. Again, I am sorry for my negative reaction within your thread to the mention of that show.

Actually, my complaint was not directed at you but at the person who made the comparison- You just made me realize what was being said in that post by your comments. But thank you for the apology.

In any case, I’ve requested the Moderator to change the Title of the thread. If that doesn’t happen then I’ll consider starting another one with a better worded Title.

 

[SwizzleStick]

Actually, my complaint was not directed at you but at the person who made the comparison- You just made me realize what was being said in that post by your comments. But thank you for the apology.

In any case, I’ve requested the Moderator to change the Title of the thread. If that doesn’t happen then I’ll consider starting another one with a better worded Title.

Thank you for being so gracious to my immediate gut reaction to the reference to the Jerry Springer show.

Perhaps a new title or new thread would be the best way to go.

 

[Pfaffenhoffen]

I feel the same sentiments.

Some memories and hurts are best forgotten and more importantly forgiven.

Sadly though its true we often hurt the ones we love most mostly out of personal pride.

We are totally different in temperament and tastes.
It took us 25 years to know each other.
It was well worth all the suffering for what we have got now…

 

[Katie966]

I’ve seen people ask if others are going/have gone through stuff that’s embarrassing too-not just asking advice about something that has happened to them. And sometimes “sharing” also helps rid of baggage. I’ve recently gone through a nasty period where such things have happened and I don’t know if that relationship will ever go back to the way it was, so I thought about asking the same here.

It certainly isn’t just “curiosity” but humans often want to know if others have done similar things and how they sorted it/changed themselves through it in the end.

If you were to give any details about what happened, maybe people would say “Oh I’ve done/said that so many times, and this is how we dealt with it” but asking people to post about such personal and hurtful things that are in the past, without doing the same yourself, I don’t think is going to get you much of a response. Ask for prayers, ask for advice, ask for encouragement, ask for similar experiences…but most people are not going to want to randomly post private experiences that they have since worked out and left in the past.

 

[Marybeloved]

If you were to give any details about what happened, maybe people would say “Oh I’ve done/said that so many times, and this is how we dealt with it” but asking people to post about such personal and hurtful things that are in the past, without doing the same yourself, I don’t think is going to get you much of a response. Ask for prayers, ask for advice, ask for encouragement, ask for similar experiences…but most people are not going to want to randomly post private experiences that they have since worked out and left in the past.

Well,basically, an argument ensued about how best to care for an ill family member. One member wanted to give him supplements the other considered dangerous and the first one was doing it in secret without consulting the Doctor or getting agreement from other members. So the latter threw out the supplements when they found out and when the first discovered, an all out war literally broke out.

There were horrible accusations thrown around about wanting to kill/starve the sick family member and even horrible, horrible insinuations about perverse (incestuous) relations, all because of what they disagreed bout. Apologies have issued from the party that hurled these obscenities, but I feel like the damage that happened is so, so deep- I really don’t know if things will ever go back to normal- I really, really don’t.

PS:- For the avoidance of doubts, I did not hurl the obscenities.

 

[runwaymodel]

Yeah…Share, please!!

What was the fight about? Who started it? Was it worth it?

Also, How did you make up (if you did) and how did it change how you related afterwards?

Good post, OP. It is a gentle reminder that I could still use a lot of improvement.
I am a bit ashamed to say that I am quite stubborn, so I mostly always start an arguement over little things (I guess its my way of taking out my stress or frustrations—thats what I assume, anyway).
I can’t recall the last time I apologized first, even when it was my fault, because I didn’t want to ‘give in’. Luckily my family members (or friends) know how hard headed I can be and they are the ones who break the ice, but its really not fair for me to do that to them. Quite ridiculous when you think about it. Our relationship is never affected by it. Sure it may be awkward for that day but for the most part its ‘forgive and forget’, though I can’t say how others would react because some people do tend to hold grudges depending on the severity of the discussion. And no, Marybeloved, the arguement is never worth it. Sometimes I wish I would just keep my mouth shut. I will definitely consider doing that next time.

 

[TheRealJuliane]

Well,basically, an argument ensued about how best to care for an ill family member. One member wanted to give him supplements the other considered dangerous and the first one was doing it in secret without consulting the Doctor or getting agreement from other members. So the latter threw out the supplements when they found out and when the first discovered, an all out war literally broke out.

There were horrible accusations thrown around about wanting to kill/starve the sick family member and even horrible, horrible insinuations about perverse (incestuous) relations, all because of what they disagreed bout. Apologies have issued from the party that hurled these obscenities, but I feel like the damage that happened is so, so deep- I really don’t know if things will ever go back to normal- I really, really don’t.

PS:- For the avoidance of doubts, I did not hurl the obscenities.

Wow. Holy moly. Well, I can understand your distress. These things can surface in that kind of situation. It’s not indicative of much other than the stress people are under, although it can seem as if everyone involved has lost their mind. Of course it was wrong of that family member to be giving supplements without medical permission - that’s a boundary violation. If that person believes that he or she has the medical background needed to heal the ill relative, they are seriously deluded, of course.

And in those tense situations, the worst in people comes out.

I don’t fight well, usually. I’ve called my son all sorts of things, in the heat of the moment. I’ve screamed, yelled, cried, been hysterical, none of which was helpful in the least. I finally learned to close my mouth and try to walk away without getting drawn into the drama, but that was after so many mistakes…It is indeed, hard to heal after so many horrible events. Amends can be made, but the memories live on…Just as I alluded to earlier - when my husband has said something cruel or thoughtless, I never forget it. I’ve actually considered making a scrapbook of these things and then destroying it, in an effort to purge them from my mind.

I suggest praying a novena for all of your relatives. Also do adoration, and light candles for them.