Having AWFUL nightmares

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keri6789

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I have been having awful nightmares for a few months now. They started after my ex-boyfriend came by one night and started banging on my windows. I haven’t had any problems in months but I still have these awful nightmares. I probably have them 3 or 4 times a week. This is the nightmare:

I’m laying in bed sleeping when I wake up because I have that someone is watching me feeling. I open my eyes and there is someone standing in the doorway of my bedroom. I try to act like I don’t see them and slowly reach for my cell phone and then the person in the door smiles at me and then I wake up.

Its terrifying. When I wake up I’m sweating and my heart is pounding. Does anyone have any suggestions about what I can do to help stop these nightmares? I know I’m safe. I check my windows and doors all the time to make sure they are locked. I pray every night for safety during the night. I’ve even prayed that please let this be a nightmare free night. I just need some sleep without this nightmare. Once I have it, I’m up all night long. I have to turn on all the lights in my apartment to get my heart to stop pounding. Any suggestions at all would be great.

Thanks!
 
Oh, sweetie! I feel for you! Your subconscious mind still feels very vulnerable. I think that will keep up until you actually do something to alter the status quo. Have you tried to file a police report? Just the act of doing that and having it on file somewhere may give your unconscious mind the ability to relax. Your brain has unfinished business with what occurred.

If you put in an alarm system at the windows that may help. You have to actually do something that will allow your mind to sleep while you do. Buy a dog? Deep down you do not feel safe. Until you fix that the nightmares will continue.

I would suggest that if you do talk to the police, you send the ex a note letting him know you have alerted police to his behavior. That way he will know he didn’t get away with that crazy behavior. And you will know he knows.

But if you don’t feel comfortable having contact with him, maybe if you call your local SAFEPLACE and talk to a phone counselor about it. This is all about you finding a way to take charge of your own safety and feeling like you are in control.

I’m so sorry. No one deserves nightmares like that. :mad:
 
keri6789 said:
I have been having awful nightmares for a few months now. They started after my ex-boyfriend came by one night and started banging on my windows. I haven’t had any problems in months but I still have these awful nightmares. I probably have them 3 or 4 times a week. This is the nightmare:

I’m laying in bed sleeping when I wake up because I have that someone is watching me feeling. I open my eyes and there is someone standing in the doorway of my bedroom. I try to act like I don’t see them and slowly reach for my cell phone and then the person in the door smiles at me and then I wake up.

Its terrifying. When I wake up I’m sweating and my heart is pounding. Does anyone have any suggestions about what I can do to help stop these nightmares? I know I’m safe. I check my windows and doors all the time to make sure they are locked. I pray every night for safety during the night. I’ve even prayed that please let this be a nightmare free night. I just need some sleep without this nightmare. Once I have it, I’m up all night long. I have to turn on all the lights in my apartment to get my heart to stop pounding. Any suggestions at all would be great.

Thanks!
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Sounds like you are suffering from some anxiety.

I think rationally you know that it is not likely that this ex-boyfriend or anyone else is going to be trying to break into your apartment. It’s been enough time from that episode that it is unlikely he is going to turn up on your doorstep or your window again. Really taking ordinary precautions like locking your doors and windows and verifying who is at the door before you answer it are all you really need to do. The trick is in finding the peace to accept that that is all that you need to do.

I find a lot of peace in going to adoration and praying the rosary. I have a restraining order against my ex-husband. He gives me plenty of grief, but has basically respected the restraining order and kept his distance, with just a couple of exceptions. I really don’t worry about him or anyone else breaking in. I just take reasonable precautions, and then whatever is going to happen is going to happen. I know in the end God will see me through it.

If despite everything you try, you can’t find that peace, you might want to talk to a psychologist and be evaluated for your anxiety. Sometimes anxiety can be a very real medical problem.
 
I studied dreams as part of a school project. Have you tried writing it down when you wake up? That can help you become aware that you’re only dreaming when you’re having that nightmare.

See, I used to have this horrofying dream of Freddy Krugger chasing me trying to kill me, and I had this dream for many, many years (at least 12). My biological dad made us watch these movies because my older sister wanted to watch them, so we watched them as a “family” (bio dad, his wife, his kid, and my sister, brother and I) when we went to visit him on vacation. :eek: I was about 5 when I saw those horrible movies (not suitable for a child, now I laugh at how cheezy they are). What helped me get thru it was this report. I tried to understand psychologically what happens to your mind and actually made myself aware it was a dream. Then, time came for a class presentation, and used a movie scene from one of those Nighmare on Elm St movies and that was the last time I had that nightmare. It’s been 8 yrs.

If you do decide to read up on dreaming, be very careful. I only did the psychological part of them. They can be part of the occult and get you places you don’t want to go to.

From what you said, your mind isn’t at peace because of your ex-b/f banging on your window. You need to deal with that, it could be the plain and simple solution of that. Taking charge and becoming aware of things helps. Your subconscious mind is telling you something, that something might be what Liberanosamalo said, file a police report.
 
keri6789 said:
I have been having awful nightmares for a few months now. They started after my ex-boyfriend came by one night and started banging on my windows. I haven’t had any problems in months but I still have these awful nightmares. I probably have them 3 or 4 times a week. This is the nightmare:

I’m laying in bed sleeping when I wake up because I have that someone is watching me feeling. I open my eyes and there is someone standing in the doorway of my bedroom. I try to act like I don’t see them and slowly reach for my cell phone and then the person in the door smiles at me and then I wake up.

Its terrifying. When I wake up I’m sweating and my heart is pounding. Does anyone have any suggestions about what I can do to help stop these nightmares? I know I’m safe. I check my windows and doors all the time to make sure they are locked. I pray every night for safety during the night. I’ve even prayed that please let this be a nightmare free night. I just need some sleep without this nightmare. Once I have it, I’m up all night long. I have to turn on all the lights in my apartment to get my heart to stop pounding. Any suggestions at all would be great.

Thanks!
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pray to Jesus the minute you wake up say, Jesus I trust in You! keep repeating it until you feel calm. and then if your inclined, say the Chaplet of Divine Mercy. it does work. trust in Jesus, and offer it up to Him.
 
Hi Keri,

Sorry to hear about your nightmares. May I ask, is this ex-boyfriend still bothering you? I don’t mean knocking at the window necessarily… I mean unwanted phone calls, emails, drive by’s… Is he harassing you in some way?

I hope you don’t mind the question. I’m a pretty stereotypical Italian American guy with three sisters, (and a few unfortunate experiences) so I can’t help but ask. I suspect he is still troubling you somehow… I hope I’m wrong.
 
keri6789 said:
I know I’m safe. I check my windows and doors all the time to make sure they are locked. I pray every night for safety during the night.
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Hi Keri, I may be coming out of left field, but personally I think the reason why you’re having these nightmares is the fact that you do not feel that you’re safe. That’s why you still check your windows and doors every night, and pray for safety. If you truly felt safe, you wouldn’t feel the need to do that.

So my advice would be to address the issues that bother you during the day time, so that they don’t haunt you at night, in your dreams. These nightmares are not going to go away, until you let go of your fears.

I don’t know if those fears are still justified. If there’s valid and real reason why you’re still holding onto those fears, then I’d see to have those resolved first. Otherwise, if these fears are purely psychological, then I’d consider seeing a psychiatrist, because it is obviously affecting you very much, so much so that it appears to be interfering with your daily life.

Keep in mind, though, that I’m no expert on this matter, so I would suggest that you talk to someone that you can trust and who has expertise in this area. Maybe talk to your priest, and he can perhaps help you himself or recommend to you someone who can.

Anyway, I hope it works out for you! Trust yourself and trust God, and you shall have peace.
 
Conciliar said:
Hi Keri,

Sorry to hear about your nightmares. May I ask, is this ex-boyfriend still bothering you? I don’t mean knocking at the window necessarily… I mean unwanted phone calls, emails, drive by’s… Is he harassing you in some way?

I hope you don’t mind the question. I’m a pretty stereotypical Italian American guy with three sisters, (and a few unfortunate experiences) so I can’t help but ask. I suspect he is still troubling you somehow… I hope I’m wrong.
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I am not having any more problems with him. I made it crystal clear that I want nothing to do with him and to never contact me again or I would call the police.
 
I think speaking to priest is in order here. it might help if he can counsel you. don’t forget to say, Jesus I trust in You!
 
TraditionalCath said:
I think speaking to priest is in order here. it might help if he can counsel you. don’t forget to say, Jesus I trust in You!
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I’m sure they have people come talk to them about all types of problems. I guess I feel embarrassed to be having nighmares like this.
 
keri6789 said:
I’m sure they have people come talk to them about all types of problems. I guess I feel embarrassed to be having nighmares like this.
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don’t feel embarrassed about having nightmares. i myself had suffered nightmares for years off an on. although at that time, i was not a practicing Catholic, a therapist gave me help. if i had been in the church, i would’ve gone to a priest instead. a priest will understand. consider this, when your speaking with a priest, do not forget he represents Christ Himself. so let that be a source of encouragement to you. yes, my therapist helped me alot. and so did lifestyle changes.
i no longer suffer nightmares.
 
Hi Keri. Sorry about your nightmares. One poster here hit the nail on the head. Your subconsious has some unfinished business she is trying to tell you.

I’ve been where you are now and I got some great advice from a therapist that worked.

Before you go to sleep you need to talk to your subconsious. Tell her that you do not understand the meanings of the dreams. Can she change them in some way. Also tell her that you are safe now. There is nothing left to fear.

I know this really sounds way out there but it works.
 
Keri, the previous posters have given you great advice. May I try with some that’s just a bit outside?

Somehow over the years (I’m in my sixties), I have developed the ability to control my dreams. I would say I can do it about 3/4 of the time. Try to think in advance of alternate paths for the dream to take – for instance, instead of reaching for the phone in the dream, say, “OK, he’s here again.” and have the police jump out from behind the door, anything like that. Maybe make the guy not be scary.

OK, I said it was far out. I hope it helps.
 
Well I tend to dream about what’s ever on my mind at the time. Like if I just watched a movie that usually what I dream about and so on. May try reading before you retire. It great for calming your nerves. I would pray as well. 😉
 
Oh Keri, I am so sorry that you are having these nightmares. I don’t have any advice for I rarely get nightmares. I will offer you what I can give you and that is my prayers. I will keep you in prayer every night before I go to bed and ask the Lord to give you peaceful sleep with no nightmares. The fear times I do get nightmares, I do what someone suggested and that is repeat the name of Jesus. I think they suggested the Divine Mercy Chaplet and that would work also and maybe you will fall asleep as you pray it, giving you peace.

You will be in my nightly prayers and I hope it helps you. Let us know if they go away. I really hope they do for your sake and for your peace.
 
I will pray for you,fear is not GOD,but GOD,calms storms,
FEAR NOT FOR GOD IS WITH YOU…Like elishias friend
they was chased up a mountain by a mighty number of enemy,
Elishia went to SLEEP,but his friend was very frieghtened! He looked and seen tourches as far as he could see down below in the night.He kept waken up elishia,elshia had enough and ask GOD TO OPEN HIS FRIENDS EYES,GOD DID,everywhere he
looked in the sky was arch angels,too many to count,too many to guess.They both went to sleep.By mourning all the enemy was destroyed or ran away!! GOD NEVER LEAVES YOU ALONE
once your in his palm nothing can pluck you out! PRAY that he
opens your eyes. GOD BLESS YOU
 
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