Head Covering at TLM vs NO Mass

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DJgang

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I do not want to beat a dead horse…however, I have searched threads on this forum about head coverings, most are debates or women supporting each other. I imagine this may turn into a debate, but I really have something that has been bothering me, especially after this morning.

This morning, I attended the Solemn High Mass at The Shrine of the Most Blessed Sacrament in Hanceville, AL…I wore a head covering.

About a month back, I attended a NO Mass at the Shrine, I wore a head covering. However, this NO Mass did have Latin…🤷

At both of these Masses I saw women who also attend my parish church. They, too, were wearing head coverings at the Shrine…

However…none of us wear a covering at the parish church’s NO Mass…

Why is this?

On the way home, I kept telling myself…this just doesn’t make sense. Our Lord is in the same Blessed Sacrament no matter what kind of Mass we are attending. Why are women so hesitate to cover at the NO Mass?

So, to reinterate…why are women covering at TLMs and not NO Masses…I’m not pointing fingers…I’m one of them…are you? Are you not?

Like I said, I’m pointing a finger at myself. I don’t want to just wear a head covering where it’s acceptable and where it is not…that’s not a devotion, that’s just submitting to peer pressure. I’m a grown woman, and I need to decide if I’m being called to cover my head and if I am, well, I should cover at all Masses that I attend and if I am not…then I shouldn’t cover at all the Masses I attend.

Pray for me.

This may seem just a little stupid, but it really is on my heart.

God bless.
 
I cover my head a the EF Mass I attend once a month. About a third of the women there do as well.

At my own parish (OF), I do not cover my head. To do so would call undue attention to myself IMO, since the only other people with veils are very young girls.

It’s a personal devotion for me. It has less to do with “peer pressure” as with context.
 
Corki said:
I cover my head a the EF Mass I attend once a month. About a third of the women there do as well.

At my own parish (OF), I do not cover my head. To do so would call undue attention to myself IMO, since the only other people with veils are very young girls.

It’s a personal devotion for me. It has less to do with “peer pressure” as with context.
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I don’t know if peer pressure was the best choice of words, that’s just what felt right as I was writing the thread.

Please explain to me EF and OF…I’m sorry, I don’t understand.
 
Jesus is present in either Mass - I cover my head when ever I’m in His presence. I’m not sure why some women pick and choose. He is no MORE present at the TLM than He is at the NO.

Sorry - I have no idea why someone who feels called to this devotion would feel it is not important at any given Mass or Adoration. Christ is there - regardless.

🤷

~Liza
 
lizaanne said:
Jesus is present in either Mass - I cover my head when ever I’m in His presence. I’m not sure why some women pick and choose. He is no MORE present at the TLM than He is at the NO.

Sorry - I have no idea why someone who feels called to this devotion would feel it is not important at any given Mass or Adoration. Christ is there - regardless.

🤷

~Liza
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Liza - that is what hit me like a ton of bricks on my drive home. Thanks for posting.
 
Maybe is the fear of being seen as trying to be better than others in the NO Mass.

I’ve been debating the head covering issue myself, but have not yet made up my mind… another thing for my SD when he comes back from vacation…

Here are my issues pro/con (only my humble personal opinions):

(1) I want to wear one, because sometimes the sheer miracle of the Mass impacts me so much, that I think head covering is the only appropiate think to do in the presence of the Divine…

(2) If you have to wear a headcovering to meet the Pope, why isn’t required to meet the Lord of Lords?

(3) I think ladies that use them look beautiful

(4) I want to do it in honor and imitation of our lady. I am sure she wears hers at every Mass. - Actually our parish had a statue of Mary unveiled and it always bothered me - now it has been replaced.

(5) I want to do it so I get less distracted during Mass and to help me focus on the Holy.

(6) I do not wear one for fear that someone may look at me and think that I am trying to “look Holy” - especially since I am anything but - funny thought since I never think that of the ladies I see wearing them.

(7) I do not wear one because I fear vanity (see #3)

So I am really torn on this issue, but like you, if I were to go to the TLM at our cathedral, I know would go buy one ASAP and put it on - confusing to me too…

God bless
 
I wear at both the traditional latin Mass and the Novus Ordo. I do it at both because they are the same Holy Sacrifice of the Mass. I just made sense to me. Usually the Novus Ordo is the only form of the Mass I have. When I travel I also do it. No one has ever given me a hard time about it. If it has bothered anyone, they haven’t told me about it. If I stand out, or it calls attention to myself, that is nothing that I am aiming for. I put it in God’s hand to guide me.
 
(7) I do not wear one because I fear vanity (see #3)
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As far as the fear of vanity. I believe most people are naturally attracted to holiness. Holiness is beauty. The veil is a symbol of holiness and gives glory to God when a woman wears it for Him. I had an older usher at my church tell me I looked beautiful in the veil. I was embarrased at first, but I knew in my heart he meant it in the purest sense. I just said thank you.
Sometimes I fear looking scary with my veil on. I try to smile to the children so they don't think I am a witch or something. No one has given me a hard time about it. In that way I have been blessed.
 
I try to cover my head at both. Though my mantilla is white and pretty and I worry about it being a distraction at NO since no one wears anything on their head there. Sometimes at the NO I will just wear a scarf.

It is so hard to be humble, when others look at you and think you’re trying to somehow show off. But that is their problem, not ours.

Something I need to pray about as well, and very good points OP!
 
I can certainly understand the apprehension of wearing one for the first time. If we were still going to our previous parish I don’t think I ever would have - it’s just too intimidating there for some reason that is hard to explain.

Once we started going to Assumption Grotto every bit of that apprehension just melted away. Not only because there are many many women and young girls who cover their heads there for all Masses, but because it just felt RIGHT. Now the first time I decided to cover my head at Mass I was a total wreck! I didn’t have a chapel veil of any sort, so I started by wearing a large silk scarf over my head and tied in back under my long hair. It actually looked very Middle Eastern. I was extremely uncomfortable like this, but my very strong feeling of needing to cover my head in the presence of God was stronger and helped me get through it. Then my first chapel veil arrived in the mail and after that I’ve felt perfectly comfortable wearing it no matter where we go to Mass or adoration. Well - I will confess - if we go to our previous parish I will wear a hat. :o I’m still not quite there yet with that parish.

But now that I’ve been covering my head for several months now I feel comfortable wearing it at funerals as well, something that was a huge anxiety for me the first time I did it. Funerals can be touchy things. The first one I went to with a covered head was for the mother of a co-worker (very Catholic family). The husband of the deceased’s daughter came to me after the Mass and was just shocked and impressed that anyone even did that anymore! I felt very humbled somehow, and a bit embarassed actually. But I was glad to be a good witness to this devotion.

So - what this all means is - just do it. The first time may have you sweating bullets. But after awhile it will be as natural as crossing yourself, and you will feel totally undressed without your head covered before our Lord. 👍

~Liza
 
I once thought about starting to wear a headcovering, even though we never go anywhere but NO masses. It seemed like a good devotion and very Biblical. But when I thought about it, isn’t the point of the headcovering to say something like,“Don’t look at me, look at Him.”? In our (very small country) parish, nobody wears anything on their head.
It seems to me that I would be drawing attention towards myself and not away. It would have exactly the opposite effect of what I would want.

For now I am going to skip the headcovering. If the Church ever decides again that women should wear headcoverings, I will embrace the practice whole-heartedly. I just don’t want to bring any extra attention to myself.

God Bless
Joyful_1
 
DJgang said:
I
So, to reinterate…why are women covering at TLMs and not NO Masses…I’m not pointing fingers…I’m one of them…are you? Are you not?

s.
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just erased 3 draft replies for lack of charity, in fact, I’m out of here. even speculating on the motives of women who do not comply with self-imposed rules of others in an area that is NOT a Church discipline strikes me as a waste of time so I think I will go hang out at the Water Cooler for a while, or better yet, non-Catholic religions, where the climate is more salubrious.
 
I have recently in the last few months started wearing a headcovering to my NO Mass. I did it as a response to what I felt was an interior urge from the Holy Spirit. I wear a lace kerchief like this one



I began wearing it as a sign of obedience to what I discerned as a call from God. I figured if it is my imagination, but I honored it as a desire of God, then He would be pleased. And, if it is a desire of God, then I must be obedient.

I agree that wearing a headcovering is a devotional practice, so there is no compulsion to wear it. I still feel awkward about wearing it at my parish where very few women wear one. I also think, most people at my parish don’t even know of the tradition, so they probably think I’m just having lots of bad hair days.

I resisted the “call” to wear a headcovering for several months for the same reason many have said–the feeling that I would be calling attention to myself. But, when praying about it in Adoration, I found that it was an issue between Jesus and I and not concerning anyone else.

I doubt anyone really cares. Most moms are more concerned with the behavior of their children next to them. And, I find that some women’s hair do’s and clothes distract me as much as a kerchief might for someone else. I’m not that recollected at Mass 😦 . In fact, sometimes, since I’m very nearsighted, I just take off my glasses so I don’t notice anyone else. Others *are *recollected and involved in the Mass.

If you feel that it is pleasing to God to wear a headcovering, just wear one. I don’t think that this very simple act of devotion deserves all the mental anguish that I gave it before I submitted.
 
And the answer, DJ, is -

TLM - why are you wearing head covering? Do they ask for it or do you know the reason why?
N.O. - whether or not they ask for it, if I’m in NO (which isn’t often of late), I try to wear one anyway.

By the way - the next question is this:
TLM? Do you kneel at the beginning of the Offertory? (i.e. “Sanctus, Sanctus, Sanctus”, etc.

If so, do you still do it in N.O.?
 
Women covering their head at Mass, has more to do with culture than holiness.

I few weeks ago I was watching an EWTN Mass on TV. I saw a woman wearing what literally looked like a doily for furniture. She didn’t look holy at all, but looked ridiculous.

Wear head covering out of humilty, not because you’ll feel that people will not see you as being holy.

Jim
 
Conservative said:
And the answer, DJ, is -

TLM - why are you wearing head covering? Do they ask for it or do you know the reason why?
N.O. - whether or not they ask for it, if I’m in NO (which isn’t often of late), I try to wear one anyway.

By the way - the next question is this:
TLM? Do you kneel at the beginning of the Offertory? (i.e. “Sanctus, Sanctus, Sanctus”, etc.

If so, do you still do it in N.O.?
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TLM - I’ve only attend one and that was Saturday morning. I’ve been wanting to head cover and felt this was my chance to see if it felt right to me, and it did. No, no one asked for it…however, if you go to the Shrine often you will see that most of the ladies cover, even during adoration.

So…this TLM and one other NO Mass at the Shrine I covered. Again, feeling like everyone was accepting of it and that I could see/feel if it was right for me.

The Santus…I think we stood…I’m trying to remember, again that was my one and only…

At my parish NO Mass…we stand.
 
leonie said:
I have recently in the last few months started wearing a headcovering to my NO Mass. I did it as a response to what I felt was an interior urge from the Holy Spirit. I wear a lace kerchief like this one

http://i80.photobucket.com/albums/j188/tobdrake/Devorah_VioletTwoDesignMimkhatah2.jpg

I began wearing it as a sign of obedience to what I discerned as a call from God. I figured if it is my imagination, but I honored it as a desire of God, then He would be pleased. And, if it is a desire of God, then I must be obedient.

I agree that wearing a headcovering is a devotional practice, so there is no compulsion to wear it. I still feel awkward about wearing it at my parish where very few women wear one. I also think, most people at my parish don’t even know of the tradition, so they probably think I’m just having lots of bad hair days.

I resisted the “call” to wear a headcovering for several months for the same reason many have said–the feeling that I would be calling attention to myself. But, when praying about it in Adoration, I found that it was an issue between Jesus and I and not concerning anyone else.

I doubt anyone really cares. Most moms are more concerned with the behavior of their children next to them. And, I find that some women’s hair do’s and clothes distract me as much as a kerchief might for someone else. I’m not that recollected at Mass 😦 . In fact, sometimes, since I’m very nearsighted, I just take off my glasses so I don’t notice anyone else. Others *are *recollected and involved in the Mass.

If you feel that it is pleasing to God to wear a headcovering, just wear one. I don’t think that this very simple act of devotion deserves all the mental anguish that I gave it before I submitted.
Click to expand...
The Jewish headcoverings are beautiful.
 
Good question. I too wear a veil at the TLM but not at the NO. I guess I do that because I personally don’t feel called to cover or that women should wear a veil. I wear a veil at the TLM, hmm, I guess as a nod to tradition and as a courtesy to those attending who do feel that it is a ‘should.’ The best I can come up with is that I also dress up for the opera/symphony/etc. If I didn’t, I’d still be seated and nothing would change for the performers or other audience members, but it is just what is done and therefore respectful to do.
 
puzzleannie said:
just erased 3 draft replies for lack of charity, in fact, I’m out of here. even speculating on the motives of women who do not comply with self-imposed rules of others in an area that is NOT a Church discipline strikes me as a waste of time so I think I will go hang out at the Water Cooler for a while, or better yet, non-Catholic religions, where the climate is more salubrious.
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Why do you even bother with reading these threads when they always seem to get you so upset? Just stay away and save yourself the frustration of having to type and erase three uncharitable responses. It’s just not worth it, and frankly I think it detracts from a very nice discussion that we have been having with other women who DO practice this devotion.

~Liza
 
DJgang said:
TLM - …

The Santus…I think we stood…I’m trying to remember, again that was my one and only…

At my parish NO Mass…we stand.
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The reason I asked about kneeling during the ‘Sanctus’ is that I’ve heard that during the “Holy, Holy, Holy” (i.e. ‘Sanctus’) - even the angels get down on bended knee. I don’t recall who I heard said this - or where they got it from - but it gives a person pause.
 
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