Head covering?

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Hi,
I am also new here. I have recently - six weeks ago - returned to the Church after more than 45 years and am experiencing a great deal of ‘culture shock’ at all the changes that have taken place during that time. In fact, there is very little left that is familiar to me.

One thing I am having struggles with is covering my head whenever I go to Church. As I live outside the United States in a Moslem country where nearly all women wear veils, it is normal for me. What is odd is going to Mass and being the only woman in the entire church who is wearing one…😊 …
When I first went to Mass I was with a Moslem friend and we were both the only ones who were covered.

Last week, I went to the vernacular Mass and the priest did not know me as he was not my confessor. I was ‘carded’ :o at the altar when I went up to receive Communion. I was asked in three different languages - none of them my native tongue but, fortunately, I understood them all - if I were Catholic. I answered ‘Yes’ in English and the priest gave me the Host. There were people in the pews around me who seemed surprised that I was going up to the altar.

Now I am wondering what to do. The thought of uncovering my head at Mass is unthinkable to me. Yet culturally, these women who attend Mass must feel that by not covering their heads they are indicating that they are Christians. I truly do not wish to draw attention to myself and yet in my heart I feel that it is almost sacreligious not to cover my head. I grew up in a very traditional environment and never went to church without a veil.

Soon I shall be moving to the U.S. and from what I am reading here, shall again be facing the question of the appropriateness of wearing a veil to Mass.

Will I indeed be thought odd or distracting if I am dressed nicely, modestly and veiled? 🤷
 
Hello,

Well, coming late to this thread, but I thought I’d comment anyway.

I’m in the process of converting, and I cover all of the time. I don’t do it in a big, flashy way, I just wear a large scarf over my hair all the time in public, and a slightly smaller, cotton one at home (so if it gets dirty I don’t worry about it as much). The only people who have ever commented were the people that I know at work, and that’s since died down. I attend Mass weekly, and if there’ve been any stares, I’ve not noticed them.

When I first felt drawn to do it, I did question it, wondering whether it would be drawing too much attention to myself, etc. But I read, somewhere on this board actually, that if it was something you felt God called you to do, then what difference did it make what other people thought of you? And that helped me a lot. In my mind, the church has left it as a personal decision, and so long as I’m not doing it showily, people should just be able to ignore it.

Thanks,
Amber
 
Hi akelios,

I was very impressed with the person who emerged through your post. By ‘Junior Member’ here I guess that means you are a teenager?
All I ever did as a teenager was to be difficult with those around me. 😊

We are really blessed to have the choice left up to us whether or not to veil. Moslem women must do it whether they wish to or not. I see them struggling down the city streets swathed completely in black in the summer heat and I wonder how they can stand it.

Because we are not required to veil, the gesture means so much more when we do. For me, personally, I have always thought of it as creating my own private space. I feel less distracted by others when I am praying in church, for example. My veils are usually long oblong-shaped ones which I wear over my head and around my shoulders. I can bring them down to the sides of my face so that I cannot see what is around me.

Something happens to me that makes me pause and reflect in that inner world which the veil creates around me. Maybe I slow down a little bit more…become more inwardly focused.

I also feel connected in a soft, feminine way with Mother Mary. She too lived in the country where I live now and she wore a veil.

Sometimes I wear it for protection from unwanted glances. Sometimes to blend in with the women around me.

You impress me with your own naturalness and ability to look beyond what others may see or think. This gives me courage also! I am so glad I posted my considerations here.

I shall remember you in my prayers so that your conversion is sweet for you. I know that you will now have the awareness of God’s love to guide you on your own life journey. I know what it means NOT to have that and you are indeed blessed.

Joy!
klara
 
Klara,

Heh. No, the ‘Junior Member’ has more to do with how long you’ve been a member and how many posts you make. I’m 26. :cool:
Oh, to be a teen and know what I know now. I’d have saved myself a lot a headaches.

I think, if I were required to wear the veil? I wouldn’t appreciate it as I do. I would obey, but I think it might lose something for me.

Like you, I can use the veil to create some private space for myself. Even when I’m not wearing it down, (I sometimes use the scarf to create a kind of snood, keeping it all tied up away from my face), I’ve noticed that people tend to talk less around me in the Church.

Thank you, and I will pray that your decision over wearing the veil or not is easier for you. You’re certainly not alone.

-Amber
 
You bring up some interesting points - and thanks to Derwin James who gave the Biblical quote, so we were clear on it.

I wear a head covering because that’s the way it was before the changes years ago. Women wouldn’t dare walk in (if they had nothing on their heads) without maybe a Kleenex, which, of course, looked silly. My thoughts have been that the head covering is a sign of reverence - perhaps started when women never left their homes without their hair / head covered.

But in opposition to Derwin, it’s not a matter of whether you feel bitterness towards the Church that should dictate wearing or not wearing a head covering. You do, however, - if you strongly believe in wearing one - stand your ground even if in a Church where women don’t wear them. You are showing reverence to God in doing so and must not let others make you feel uncomfortable for doing so. It’s not a matter of following the crowd - it’s a matter of conscience and reverence.
 
I am writing this as a person who was around in the days when one of the main ways to tell the difference between Catholics and Protestants (not counting traditionally Black churches–I did not know about them at the time) is that Catholic women never entered a church without some type of head covering. That head covering could range from a hankerchief pinned in the hair in an emergency to a hat. There were very few veils worn, at least where I lived. Mostly we wore hats or a scarf. While my mother easily wore a hat, it was difficult to find one that fit my face. If you look at any of the vintage clothing stores, you will find that most hats of the 1960’s were very high crowned to accomodate the hairstyles of the time. Have you seen pictures of peasants wearing scarves on their head? Again, it was not necessarily a flattering look.
Of course, the purpose of wearing a head covering in church was not to attract attention from the opposite sex.

Another thing to consider from that time period is that women wore hats if they needed to go to court for any reason. A woman was not considered completely dressed until she put on her white gloves. It is gradually that these ways of dressing disappeared.

In the 1970’s, narrow scarves became fashionable. These scarves could be worn around the waist. around the neck, or around a long pony tail. They could also be worn around the head, hairband style. I have seen this hairband style coming back. It can be found at Claire’s, actually attached to a hairband. As a young woman of 16, this style would definitely not draw undue attention.
I do like chapel veils, not really seen much before the mid sixties. I recently bought a beret. So, yes, there are options that will not draw undue attention.
As a lector and EMCH, I do not wear any type of head covering on the altar for the reason initially raised. I do not want to draw undue attention to myself. I have started letting my hair grow again. I braid it and put it up for Sundays and any other time that I want to look professional. Perhaps, that is the best way to look at it. Dressing professionally is like dressing in our Sunday best. Does God deserve any less?
 
rpp said:
As a man, I find women who wear head covering at mass to be more, well, feminine. That is not to say that women who do not wear them are less feminine. Rather the head covering proclaims their femininity to all. I find it, somehow, attractive.

It is an optional devotion of course. But one with a very long tradition.

I recall hearing, but I do not know if it is true, that at St. Peters in Rome, women are still required to wear head coverings at Mass. Does anyone know if this is true?
Click to expand...
No, a head covering is no longer required at St. Peter’s, nor are skits. Women are requried to wear classical cuts in clothing, short or long sleeves, long slacks or skirts. The head covering has been suspended.

If the head covering were still in place, half of the women religioius who work at the Vatican wouldn’t have jobs. Many women religious no longer wear a veil.

Of course, head coverings for men was abolished a long time ago, except for bishops and men religious whose orders wear a scull cap or a hood.

Fraternally,

JR 🙂
 
I found one reply (sorry, I can’t recall who it was) which was interesting - that the Ark of the Covenant was veiled. Very interesting. Hats are great when the weather dictates. But a chapel veil is really one of several things to my mind:
(1) culturally, in some countries it’s a head covering of choice;
(2) dressy;
(3) convenient. In other words, for those who might complain that a hat ruins their hairdo - a veil is lightweight AND it can folded up and put away after leaving Church. Think of it as the most convenient and compact choice.👍
 
I am sure you are long gone by now, but I hope you have followed your heart in the acting decision. You may not be aware but in particular the more t"traditional orders" what Mother Superior says gos. So if you really wanted to be an actor, she would assign you to the kitchen to teach you humility.
As for the head covering, yes the men would surely want your head covered also to teach you that you are not quite as good as they are.;
Hope you have chosen a free and unfettered life.
 
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